I Want To Be So Kind It Echoes Backwards In Time And Undoes The Things That Hurt You. I Want To Be So

This world has a lot of awful stuff and if someone holding a stuffed animal helps them cope, let them hold a stuffed animal. It doesn’t matter how old they are or what gender they are.

Be unapologetically you. Sing in your car, dance in the grocery store, jump off the sidewalk. Do the things that make you happy.

Ed Sheeran and live (bad) country is not a combination I thought I’d hear in my life. And now I wish I hadn’t.

Jesus (God) can be my rock, but they have to be able to shake

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I'm just going to leave this here, because this woman said what I've been trying to articulate for ages much more effectively and succinctly than I've been able to

I was babysitting for my mom’s cousin and there were supposed to be a couple more kids than hers. I was not told I’d be looking after about 9 kids (fortunately 2 of them were old enough to mostly look after themselves) while the adults were outside having free time. I had only ever babysat my two cousins who were enough of a handful so adding five kids to the mix was a lot for me.

Anyway, one of my cousins and her three friends come in to the playroom. They are upset and two girls are crying. I get the story that they were playing with a microphone and there was a little bit of a fight over who got it next. One of them accidentally hit another with it. The other girls are saying it was on purpose. Eventually I am able to get the girl who was hit to calm down and get everyone but the girl who accidentally hit her friend to go downstairs for a bit. The last girl is crying and telling me it was an accident. I immediately tell her I believe her.

And guys, she looked at me like no one had ever said that to her. There are plenty of details from that night I don’t remember but I will never forget her face. I felt like I was the first adult (pseudo adult? I was like 19) to tell her that I believed her.

So don’t automatically assume kids are lying or anything. Or that they are upset for some stupid reason. Even if it is a stupid reason to you, it isn’t to the kid. They have a lot less life experience to pull from and their brains are still growing.

I sat with a crying second grader today. (The age range is outside my wheelhouse but I was the most convenient adult.) He was crying, the other adults said, because his brother took a phone he was playing on. “Phone addicted,” everybody said. “If he would get up and play games with the other kids he wouldn’t be crying.”

He told me everyone lets his brother take things from him because his brother is younger, and doesn’t know better. He told me he doesn’t want to play because he’s tired, he has too many extracurriculars this summer and can’t get good sleep because “everyone in my camper is so loud when I’m trying to sleep.” He’s exhausted and only eight. His mom’s an acquaintance and told me she and the kid’s father are going through a separation — mom and four kids left the house to stay in a camper.

But people will seriously not listen to kids crying over seemingly minor things because on the surface it looks like a tantrum. If kids are given the space to articulate themselves they often will.

If you are stuck,

Take a step back

Take a breath

Clear the board

And start again

Anyone else feel like life (especially in America) is like gambling in a rigged game. Like oh you have to pay $70 for each college application and even if you are a solid applicant at least 75% will reject you. Oh you want to apply to jobs. Well you need a cover letter that is specific for why you want to earn minimum wage at Starbucks and you better not put down that you need a job. We don’t want any one who isn’t committed to our corporate overlords. Oh you want to volunteer in a lab. Well not sure that you are the right fit for our lab right now. And don’t get me started on trying to get a response from potential PhD advisors that you email.

I’m just really tired.

When I can’t go to sleep because I’m thinking of things I need to do and my anxiety is too loud, I just tell myself that either I get up now and do something about it or I stop worrying about it. About 80% of the time, it works to help me fall asleep.