Arches National Park, Utah photo: Elliot McGucken
They should make a new Batman vs Superman with the new Batman and Superman but instead of fighting they make out sloppy styl- WHAT! WHO SAID THAT?! WHO SAID THAT?
On a Gotham Rooftop somewhere overlooking a rouge fight
Deathstroke: the fuck are you doing up here
Mini stalker Tim drake, holding a camera: just trying to get a good shot, Mister!
Deathstoke: what a coincidence.
*gun cocking sound*
Bruce, who has a problem expressing emotions because he was teased for them in school as the "crazy Wayne kid"
Bruce, who used to clutch Alfred at night and wet himself due to his nightmares.
Bruce, who got flashbacks till his mid-twenties everytime he walked down an alley.
Bruce, who would hug a weeping Dick Grayson and stay with him until the night terrors were over, humming a soft lullaby that Bruce's mother sang for him
Bruce, who hardened his mouth and his life to keep the anger in check after Jason, because he knew if he didn't every criminal would pay.
Bruce, who sees Damian chopping up shrubbery and thinks "I was far worse as a child inside, it's a good thing he's letting it out"
Bruce, who can't walk by a homeless child in the street without calling his special Wayne Foundation liaison (who he keeps on speed dial) and asking her to find "one more spot"
Bruce, who sees Selina petting kittens and robbing the rich and thinks "if I could have had a life with her, that would have been nice"
Bruce, who looks at Cass' x-rays and sees her knit bones and swears to god he will break the bones of whoever's responsible for her upbringing
Bruce, who gives Tim projects that he himself can do faster because he sees attention-starved Tim trying to please him
Bruce, who looks at Clark smiling and thinks of what he can buy for his birthday to make him smile just like that.
Bruce to his parents in their graves after not being able to catch a criminal: I'm sorry. I've failed you. I'll try harder.
People who don't know Bruce: why is that man so unfeeling.
Bad DC writers: idk just that way i guess
Bruce going to the park and realizing he has an extra kid
Bruce: hey boys, come get some cupcakes! *opening the package he bought earlier at the store* here, Dick, I know you like chocolate—here, Jason, that’s funfetti, here, Kid, this one’s—wait Dick, Jason, and Kid: *stare up at him innocently* Bruce: *slowly relinquishes the cupcake to Kid* uh . . . Who is this? Jason: *nonchalantly* oh, this is Tim. Our brother. Bruce: *chokes, immediately wondering if he somehow missed that Jason or Dick had a brother* your what— Jason: our brother? Bruce: *coughs* that’s what I thought you said, but that doesn’t clear anything u- Tim: *adorably* mister? Are you their dad? Jason: yeah, he is. Tim: *hugs Bruce* Bruce: Bruce: *looks to Dick and narrows his eyes, still holding into Tim* you Planned This, you little demon Dick: oh absolutely *fist bumps Jason* Jason: so can we keep him? Bruce: he’s a child, not a dog- Tim: *still hugging Bruce* mister, this cupcake is delicious! I don’t get any sweets at home, mama says it’ll make me too fat for the press Bruce: *immediately* nope, he’s ours now
Izuku saw some terrible things on that battlefield....
Duke and Jason have been banned from being anywhere near each other in costume because the arguments they will break out into is both too intense and too distracting for patrol. Everyone thinks they're serious but after the first 10-20 times they do it for the love of the game.
Duke: Shut the fuck up.
Jason: You shut the fuck up.
Duke: Zombie
Jason: Flashlight
Duke: That's why the joker still alive
Jason: That's why the joker did what he did to ya mom.
Duke: Nigga where ya mom at? Dea—
Bruce over the comms who, along with the entire bat family has been listening to entire thing: Signal, Red Hood! SPERATE! NOW!
They are now giggling as dick and cass drag them apart.
Dick : so yeah, we should definitely- oh hey jason, do you want to join us? We were planning to go to the movies-
Jason, who's looking down at his phone, walking past them,
Jason : maby another time, dad.
Dick :
Tim :
Damian :
Duke :
Jason, just walking off, leaving them baffled.
Duke : ..what just happend?
Dick : oh no..do I.. look like bruce?..
Tim who's being frantic : did he even notice that he called you- wait what? How-
Damian : does todd think...
Duke : is this normal? Did this happen before?!
Tim : ...no. sure, dick is a great older brother but none of us ever called him dad..
Damian : I'm sure todd ment to say dick, but misspoke..
Dick : do I look like b?!!!
Jason, who recently found out that dick tried to adopt him, and now to mess with bruce, calling dick dad and B gramps.