Hey :D Can You Do The Crush Thing On INFJ Please?

Hey :D can you do the crush thing on INFJ please?

Generally speaking, INFJs do not handle crushes very gracefully. The combination of Ni-Fe-Ti will often make them overthink things and inferior Se makes them blind to the realities of the situation. Mature INFJs who are more in touch with Fe/Se will trust their intuitions and, as a result, be more bold to pursue crushes even if they feel some anxiety about the outcome; they will feel confident in their own ability to deal with whatever happens. Less mature INFJs who are more aligned with Ni/Ti would probably have low self-esteem and a much stronger fear of getting hurt/rejected. They could get stuck endlessly analyzing or obsessing about the “truth” of the situation, never reaching any conclusion because there are simply too many unknowns. This can leave them paralyzed and torn between the fear of missing out and the lack of confidence to take action. They might unconsciously fill the void of knowledge by idealizing the crush, only to end up incredibly disappointed when the person/situation does not match their expectations. INFJs value privacy and can tend towards secrecy because Ni has a natural inclination towards self-protection and managing consequences. Compared to other inexpressive/introverted types, INFJs generally possess a greater capacity for masking emotional turmoil, so their “poker face” is often impenetrable; Fe prevents them from disturbing the status quo and they can utilize Ti to harden or detach themselves. This makes it easy for them to hide their true feelings and suffer alone in silence. As a result, it is not unusual for INFJs to miss the opportunity to start a new relationship because, by the time they feel prepared enough to take action, the other person is already beyond reach.

From the other person’s perspective: Mature INFJs will send out more obvious signals, but less mature ones can be extremely subtle because they need to proceed as slowly as possible in order to manage any anxiety. They will find opportunities to be near you or chat with you. The more anxious ones will investigate you from a distance or through mutual friends. They will want to know all about you, your family, your past, your future goals, your inner most thoughts, etc. They will try and take advantage of every chance to know you more deeply without being too obvious. However, it is important to note that people often feel drawn to INFJs because they are generally helpful people and very good listeners who can carry on quite lengthy conversations without ever sharing anything about themselves. Thus, it would be important to make sure that their interest in you is for personal reasons and not motivated by a selfless desire to help you out with some problem/issue. Generally speaking, INFJs are not so outgoing as to want to know everything about everyone, so if they take a keen interest in you for reasons that are not entirely obvious, it is usually a good sign. Mature INFJs generally appreciate honesty and the courage to be vulnerable, so you should probably just be direct with them if you are unsure about how they feel. No matter how they feel, they will likely discuss and process all your feelings with you until both parties feel a sense of closure. However, less mature INFJs can be defensive, oversensitive, and easily overwhelmed, so proceed with caution where they are concerned because there is a possibility that you could get door-slammed. It is probably a good idea to form a close friendship with an INFJ (by getting to know them better) before pursuing anything romantic because many of them take a serious and long term view of relationships. They want a lasting and deep connection which requires some time to build up trust and understanding, so it is usually not a good idea to try and push or rush an INFJ into anything.

More Posts from Ace-with-anxiety and Others

ace-with-anxiety

6 years ago

Anyone else relate to these ace moods?

1) thinking you just have really high standards

2) thinking you have a very specific type which you haven’t found yet

3) thinking other people are joking

4) not realizing the song was about sex

5) thinking movies and tv are over dramatizing it

6) thinking movie and tv is accurate but like how???

7) not knowing which one it is

8) wondering when you’ll turn out to be gay

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ace-with-anxiety

5 years ago

I have no idea what we did, but the Travelers fandom has been blessed with the most amazing male characters. David, Trevor, and Philip are such wonderful people, the amount of generosity, care and kindness the have for others melts my heart and brings me to tears. Each and every episode further proves how awesome they are and it is a wonderful thing to see on a TV show.

And the ladies are such badasses and so smart and skillful, they floor me, especially Carly.

Going in, I didn’t think this show was anything special, but boy, was I wrong! I’m so glad I gave it a chance. I honestly hope it will get renewed for S3

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ace-with-anxiety

4 years ago

Just Gifted Kid™ things:

when you find yourself constantly censoring your own intelligence because in middle school everyone thought you were stuck up so maybe if you try to be Relatable™ people will like you.

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ace-with-anxiety

8 years ago

Life things are tiring.

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ace-with-anxiety

5 years ago

Hey, do you have any ace klaus headcanons? I just found out someone I knew and liked doesn’t believe aces experience oppression and it’s bumming me out, so I would really like some validation. If you don’t want to that’s fine.

I’m so sorry :( That really sucks. People suck!

I actually wrote a whole story that can be found right here just for ace Klaus.

And I will make some more just for you:

AKA. The “What if Klaus was ace sequel.”

Klaus returned home from Vietnam heartbroken. All he wanted was a long bath and to forget everything about the last year except the sound of Dave’s voice.

Then some weird shit happened with the apocalypse but that kind of sorted itself out.

In the end their family was left in a big empty house together just like when they were kids.

He kind of expected them all to fuck off again like when they were kids. But no one left. Allison returned in between filming for her movies. Five had nowhere else to go. Vanya was there more often than not just to hang out. And even Diego started sleeping in the mansion, claiming it was for no other reason than the beds were better than the gym’s.

It was with Diego who Klaus started bonding with the most. Diego talked about Eudora. Klaus talked about Dave.

And it was during one of these bonding sessions (crying sessions) that Klaus said to his brother that Dave’s was only person who never forced Klaus into sex.

DIEGO FLIPPED THE FUCK OUT.

“What do you mean force you?”

“Show me where these fuckers are I’ll stab them to death.”

“Fine I’ll ask Five to psychologically scar them if you won’t let me kill them!”

When Klaus finally calmed Diego down enough to explain, he told his brother that he never actually wanted sex, it was just that sex was the easiest way to get a roof over his head on cold nights and food in his belly and drugs in his system.

When Klaus was done explaining it all, including how amazing and perfect Dave is (was,) Diego said slowly, “Klaus do you think you’re asexual?”

To which Klaus replied “What’s asexual?”

And then that’s when Diego started explaining that Klaus was not broken or abnormal or weird.

Asexuality is completely and utterly okay.

And in the future there would be hours of looking up more about asexuality, learning about the ace spectrum, and of finding groups in the city where Klaus would meet close friends.

But that night there was just two Diego telling Klaus that he would never let anyone touch him again.

Except of course when Dave’s ghost wanted to give Klaus cuddles.

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ace-with-anxiety

8 years ago

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ace-with-anxiety

4 years ago

shoutout to all the “gifted kids”

who now have depression and/or anxiety, are probably adhd but dont know bc they were never diagnosed bc they just assumed that was part of being “gifted”, have a crippling fear of rejection and not being good enough, struggle to learn new skills bc if they arent perfect the first time then whats the point, and hide all of their self doubt with memes

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ace-with-anxiety

7 years ago

Dad!Tony putting a heater in his spider son’s suit is just aslfajakjdla

Like he seriously brainstormed every possible situation and put something in the spidey suit to counter it.

“Never know when we’ll have a mission in sub-zero temperatures, gotta make sure my son stays warm.”

“Never know when he might have the urge to jump off a plane (like a problematic super solider i know) better make sure he has a parachute.”

*Thinks up every single problematic thing that may occur* “Oop, gotta make sure he has a web for this, and a web for that, and a web that can do this, I’m pretty sure real webs don’t actually do this, but he might need it anyways…”

*Over 500 combinations later*

“Do you think that’s enough Fri? Actually don’t answer that, my spider-son can never have too much.”

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ace-with-anxiety

6 years ago

how I empathise

I have what I would call hyperempathy.

This means, I will empathise with anything and everything and I can’t control it.

In order to understand how someone or something might feel in any given situation, my brain will simulate the situation in myself and create emotions that would most logically stem from that experience.

For example, I empathise most strongly with the feelings of those who are just about to die, kill themselves, or be killed. Death is a funny thing to empathise with. It’s hard for me to understand, in a way, so I suppose that is why I empathise most strongly with it.

So, if I read about someone being violently murdered or a group of people being massacred, I feel what they might have felt. Fear, anger, panic, pain. I can feel it. Sometimes I feel it so strongly, I start to panic or my anxiety will latch onto it and kick me into depression or other low moods.

Sometimes, I’ll feel ill if I empathise too strongly for too long.

Remember how some people will throw up after witnessing something traumatic? I’ll feel like that. I won’t throw up, because my body hasn’t been pushed to that edge, but I’ll feel subtle effects.

This makes it very hard for me to read books or history with great detail on killing. I can’t turn it off.

Another thing I empathise with strongly is the emotions of others, including my family and close friends. Their emotions influence mine very strongly and if they mention feeling anxious or hurt, I’ll feel that as well.

Sometimes, when it’s bad enough, I’ll be able to hold myself together long enough to help calm them down, but then I’ll need someone to help calm me down as well.

Empathy is a strange thing for me. It controls a lot of what I feel and even though I’d like it to stop in some situations, it continues to affect me. I’m not trying to be rude and I’m certainly not attempting to fake my understanding of something that has happened to someone else. I just love and feel so strongly for others, wanting them to be happy or feel alright that when they don’t, I need to understand why and the only way I can is by replicating what I imagine their emotions to be in myself.

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ace-with-anxiety

8 years ago