Heartwarming Meeting

Random Dungeons & Dragons (and other fantasy tabletop RPG) resource #137: reasons why the party can’t buy the thing – roll 1d20 or choose:

Local regulations require anyone who wishes to buy or sell the item or service in question to obtain the personal approval of a particular political or religious leader. How’s your schmoozing?

Local regulations require anyone who wishes to buy or sell the item or service in question to obtain permission from a particular bureaucratic institution and adhere to a complicated and onerous set of rules; the punishment for flouting them is severe.

A powerful regional organisation (guild, cult, mercantile concern, etc.) wields an absolute monopoly over the item or service in question. Dealing with them may be risky, or – particularly for lawful or good parties – pose sticky ethical quandaries.

The item or service in question can’t legally be provided to the party in particular, and anyone who does so will face considerable censure. What obscure law or taboo have they run afoul of?

The item or service in question is entirely prohibited by a local bylaw, religious taboo, or regional curse, forcing merchants and providers underground. There’s probably a story there.

The item or service in question is entirely prohibited by recent edict of the local ruler, and merchants and providers who deal in it have found themselves newly outlawed. There’s definitely a story there!

The merchant or provider lives somewhere extraordinarily inconvenient and keeps odd hours. Making the purchase may be easy enough, but being in a position to make it will be a challenge.

The merchant or provider is itinerant and travels a circuit of several communities. Maybe the locals know their next destination?

The merchant or provider will only deal with members of a particular guild, cult, or social club. Can the party get a member to act as a go-between, or will they need to obtain (or fake) membership themselves?

The merchant or provider requires an introduction or letter of reference from an existing customer before they’ll deal with the party. Who are their existing customers? Good question!

The merchant or provider refuses to accept gold, and wants a particular item or service in exchange. What are they after?

The merchant or provider hates the party’s guts for some unspecified reason, and refuses to deal with them. Persuasion or intimidation may be in order, but push it too far and the authorities will end up involved.

The entire local supply has been stolen by monsters or bandits (for goods) or the local provider(s) have been kidnapped by the same (for services). If the party wants to buy, a rescue mission is in order.

The entire local supply has been confiscated by the ruler (for goods) or the local provider(s) have been conscripted (for services). As above, but with more awkward explanations if the party gets caught.

A wealthy private individual bought up the entire local supply (for goods) or hired the local provider(s) for a long-term project (for services) shortly before the party arrived. Will they be willing to share?

A band of rival adventurers bought up the entire local supply (for goods) or hired the local provider(s) for a long-term project (for services) shortly before the party arrived. Are they after the same goal?

The item or service in question is readily available, but the merchant or provider proves to be a skilled con artist, confused ghost or mischievous fae. Can the party catch them in the act, or will they be obliged to give chase to get their money back once the deception comes to light?

The item or service in question is readily available, but the items carry strange magical quirks (for goods) or the provider is a magic-user with eccentric new ideas they’re just itching to put into practice (for services). Is it worth the hassle?

The local community obtains the item or service in question in an unconventional and typically magical fashion; for example, a party in need of weapons finds that the village has no weaponsmith, but in the foothills outside of town lies a grove where swords grow on trees, guarded by an ill-tempered but sleepy manticore.

The merchant or provider is powerful monster, who deals in strange coin. How did this arrangement come to pass?

The preceding entries are arranged into subtables so you can target specific types of inconveniences with suitable rolls, as follows:

Legal barrier: roll 1d6

Annoying or inconvenient provider: roll 1d6+6

Someone else has it: roll 1d4+12

The weird stuff: roll 1d4+16

Cats have toe beans cuz if they had regular beans it would be really uncomfortable

I didn’t want to make this post but I was pressured into it by my friends. Enjoy.

we as humans are always learning

Hes a cute lil boi

Beanut

[Meme] LEGO CITY BEIJING (1989)

stop everything, this is bitty doing research for his thesis

there's more lmao, unhinged bitty energy

*Freezes time*

*Changes nothing except doing this to a random young child*

Kevin had a bad day