Found This In The Comments Of Shaun's Latest Video On Andrew Tate, In Which He Talks Pretty Extensively

*hears a foreign language i don’t speak*

me: *sobbing* it’s beautiful i must learn it

People who act aggressive and negative as fuck and then when you’re like “hey can you stop” they’re like “I’m going through some stuff 🥺🥺🥺” like damn dude that’s crazy me too - for example right now I’m going through YOUR behavior.

so women are supposed to grin and bear the books, the comics, the movies, the plays, the tv shows, the stories, the sci-fi, the translated ancient poems, the fucking millennia of men writing about their self inserts torturing women and it being declared as High Art by other men, we’re supposed to read it in our free time, study it in classrooms, include their styles in our own writing, accept their cultural influence as natural, watch it in the cinema, write about it, talk about it, accept it, aspire it, but men can’t tolerate three seconds of female wish fulfilment of a woman snapping the wrist of a creep without feeling personally kicked in the balls.

Silco X vampire reader

Send me a NSFW headcanon and I'll write a 5 sentence ficlet about it

Trans Silco for this one (Uses terms dick, cunt and slit)

-

When your mouth leaves his cunt, the whine he gives is glorious, full of need and want, without even having your bite, as you've grown to taste him without even needing to nibble.

But sometimes you still like to, as you move your mouth to his thigh, while you raise a hand to rub over his dick, enjoying the curse. Your teeth sink in and his back arches off the bed, much to your amusement.

"Easy beloved," you purr, with a lap to the small cut you've made, watching him twitch and his slit leak, gushing out more of that wonderful taste, "I'll eat you again soon."

To your surprise, he glares down at you, canting his hips and bringing them back to your face, and the boldness only encourages you to dip your tongue into his folds once more, much to his loud affirming pleasure.

Real Penguins Make Do - BTAS Oswald Cobblepot x Reader

Summary: You decide to bring a new toy into the bedroom. Oswald is more than happy to oblige. GN reader. (The title is from a joke on the Arkham Discord)

Word Count: 2.3k (I'm so sorry)

Warnings: Ovipositors, slight breeding kink, dom/sub dynamics, dom!reader, Oswald's trust issues

It never failed to amaze you how authoritarian Oswald was in his day-to-day life juxtaposed against how, frankly, needy he was when alone with you.

Oswald's whole body shuddered beneath you, even without having been touched, and you thought to yourself, not for the first time, how lucky you were to get to see him like this. With his poise and dignity stripped away, leaving him bare and raw and open. Only you would ever know how touch-starved he truly was, how he'd preen under the smallest scraps of affection.

"Such a sweet boy..." Your voice was barely above a murmur and you gently touched his cheek, smiling at how his head subtly tilted into your palm. His eyes were already soft and glassy as he looked up at you with that lovestruck grin that always appeared when you held him like this.

"And what do you have planned for us tonight, my turtledove?" You could tell how hard he was trying to retain his usual smooth, collected tone, but the tremor in his voice was unmistakable.

"And ruin the surprise? You'll find out as we go."

And, god, that worked exactly as you had hoped. All the air escaped his lungs in a reverent 'oh' as his pupils dilated.

"W-well," he swallowed thickly, "I am yours to do with what you will."

"Mm, I already knew that." You twisted your fingers into his hair and pulled, relishing the drawn-out whine that you elicited. As much as you loved cradling him in your arms like this, you did have a plan to get to. "Alright, pretty boy, I want you on the bed, legs spread."

Oswald nearly tripped over his own feet in his rush to obey.

Once situated, he looked over at where you were standing, brow furrowed in confusion. You were holding what he could only assume was a sex toy, but the shape was unlike any he had ever seen before. The length didn't seem terribly intimidating, no more than six inches, but the thought of how girthy knot at the base and the little bumps that covered it would feel inside of him made Oswald whimper and unconsciously rub his thighs together. The strange part, though, was the hole in the tip that seemed to go all the way down the toy and the clamshell container you held in your other hand.

Still, the fact that Oswald had no idea what he was looking at only made him impossibly harder. He hadn't requested this. You were bringing this into the bedroom entirely of your own volition, because you wanted to use it on him, and that thought alone made Oswald dizzy.

At this point, he was convinced that there was almost nothing he wouldn't eagerly let you do to him. While he had gotten a lot better about it over the course of your relationship, there would always be some lingering doubts as to whether you were only with him to use him, or worse, out of pity. So, if you wanted to do something that normally wouldn't interest him, that only made it all the more appealing. He could know with certainty that you were doing it for yourself, and that, no matter how hard it was to imagine, he was desired.

Oswald was wrenched from his thoughts by your hand settling gently on his thigh, and he couldn't help but gasp softly at the touch. God, he must look so pathetic like this, and yet, he couldn't find it in himself to care.

"Ozzy?" You set the clamshell down on the bed so that you could hold the toy in both hands. "Do you know what this is?"

Oswald shook his head, eyes widening as he took in the sight properly. It was even more intimidating up close, and he had to bite his cheek to keep from moaning out loud.

"You can touch it, if you'd like. It's called an ovipositor." He tentatively reached out to touch the bumpy surface, and you smiled before opening the clamshell. Inside were yellow, translucent eggs. "These are made from gelatin. That way they'll dissolve if they get stuck."

"Get... stuck..." Oswald looked between the eggs and the toy as it slowly dawned on him what it was designed to do. A shiver ran down his spine and he squirmed in place. "Oh, lord have mercy..."

You snickered at his reaction, but he was too dazed to care. You squeezed his hand lightly to pull him out of it. "Colour, baby?"

His eyes flicked up to meet yours and he swallowed, nodding once. "Green. Very green."

You brought his hand up to your lips and kissed his fused knuckles gently, smiling at how his already red face turned nearly purple in embarrassment. "Alright. Don't hesitate to tell me if it's too much, okay?"

Oswald nodded, breath quickening as you nudged his legs apart once again. He heard the squelch of lube being squeezed onto your fingers, but even with that warning, he still jolted when he felt your fingers press against his hole.

"Please..." he whispered, though what he was begging for, he wasn't sure.

You smiled down at him, and Oswald had to close his eyes to keep from swooning. As always, he opened up beautifully for you, eagerly accepting your fingers as his hole readily stretched to take more, as though he had been made for this. You'd mentioned that last bit more than once before, and even as he hit your shoulder indignantly in response, his cock invariably betrayed him.

Now, though, you decided to spare him the teasing, and he was silently grateful for it. He was already showing you far more vulnerability than he'd be comfortable with were it anyone else. Still, that didn't stop him from arching his back with a soft wheeze when he felt your fingers brush against his prostate.

His eyes opened a fraction, still heavily lidded, and he looked up at you with an embarrassing squeak. His eyes flicked down to the toy in your hands and he licked his lips in anticipation.

"You ready, honey?" Your voice pierced through his haze like an arrow and he sucked in a breath. He waited for a moment before answering, wanting to drink in every moment, every soft gaze and kind word, until they drowned the ghosts of his past in their sacchirine flood.

He was not, however, a patient man, so it was only a few seconds before he was nodding frantically, biting his lip until a metallic tang burst on his tongue. He knew how pathetic he must look, how ashamed he ought to be, and yet, with you, he couldn't bring himself to care. Need washed over him like an oppressive cloak and his mind could only repeat you, you, you in a broken prayer.

Slowly, (far more slowly than Oswald would have liked, and yet, the strange tenderness of it could make him cry), you began to inch the toy into him. It started off easy. Most of the toy was smooth and gently tapered, so it slid into him with little resistance, and for a moment, he allowed himself to relax.

Then he reached the knot. The toy doubled in girth at the base, and Oswald threw his head back against the pillow with a soft thump, choking on his own spit. The bumps were tantalizingly prominent, and he swore he could count every single one of them as they dragged along his inner walls. His hands scrambled for purchase on the sheets and he keened helplessly, his hips twitching and writhing of their own accord, only to cause the toy to shift inside of him and repeat the cycle all over again.

Once he had taken it in to hilt, you stopped, allowing him to get used to the new sensations. By this point, he was babbling incoherently and his chest was red and splotchy from arousal. You smiled down at him and cupped his cheek in your hand, and he leaned into it without even seeming to realize it.

"Colour, Ozzy?"

His forehead crinkled in dismay at having to try to get something coherent to leave his mouth, but he managed a weak, "G-green..."

You smiled your approval, and Oswald felt like he was flying. Then the toy began to move.

The sounds leaving Oswald's lips as you fucked him with the ovipositor were absolutely broken, and it took him a moment to even realize they were coming from himself. It was all too much, far too much, and yet if you stopped, he thought he might die. The toy plunged deep inside if him, but the knot was what really broke him. It slid in and out, stretching his hole to the limit and then suddenly releasing it in rapid succession. It was so fast, so brutal, and yet the dramatic texture ensured that he felt everything. Squeals that he would surely be embarrassed by later fell freely from his throat and he alternated between begging for you to slow down and fuck him harder. You did neither. You took him at the pace you wanted, and when your free hand held his hips in a bruising grasp to stop them from moving, he could only moan.

"You're such a good boy. Taking it so well for me," you cooed, your gentle tone juxtaposed painfully against what you were doing, "Do you want me to pump you full of eggs, baby? Want me to breed you?"

And fuck, he never stood a chance, did he?

Oswald was too lost in his own pleasure to respond verbally, but he nodded desperately, and you noted the way he squirmed with every word. You smirked as you realized you may have awoken something in him.

"Yeah? You want to carry my eggs for me? Incubate them just like a real penguin?"

Okay, maybe that last part was a little silly, and you snorted internally, but Oswald didn't seem to notice. His eyes were glazed over and hazy and could only whimper in response, reaching up to cling to your shoulders with trembling hands.

You lined one of the gelatin eggs up with the ovipositor and pushed it down the tube. Oswald cried out and kicked his legs frenetically. He could feel the egg as a lump inside the toy slowly working its way to the tip, as though it were pulsating. When the egg popped out the tip, he felt it slide in deep as his hole swallowed it down greedily. Vaguely, your comment about the potential for the eggs getting stuck echoed in his mind, and he moaned at the thought.

One by one, you pushed the eggs through the ovipositor slowly, watching him writhe and gasp with every one. By the time you were lining up the last egg, tears were blurring his vision. He felt so full, in ways that he had never experienced before, and he was holding his orgasm back by his fingernails.

"P-please... please... I-I need..."

You smiled at his incohesive prattling and bent down to kiss his forehead, noting how he whined just as sharply at the affection as if you had grabbed his dick.

"Just one more, Ozzy. Just take one more egg and you can cum. Think you can do that for me?" you said gently, running your free hand through his hair. You were getting it greasy with lube, but with how much he was sweating at this point, it didn't seem to matter much.

His breath was quivering and he looked on the verge of weeping, but he nodded meekly in response.

"Good boy."

The praise sent a shudder down his spine, and it took all of his concentration to hold back as he felt the slow movement of the egg inside of the toy working its way into him. He looked absolutely wreaked, and as soon as he felt the soft pop of the egg being pushed out of the toy, he screeched in white-hot pleasure and finally allowed his climax to overtake him. His whole body convulsed as he rode it out, almost looking as though he was being electrocuted, and you couldn't help but take hold of the toy to fuck him through it.

For Oswald, the next several minutes were an exhausted blur, and the next thing he knew, he had been cleaned off with a wet towel and was curled up against your chest. He clung to you with slow, shuddering breaths and slowly looked up to meet your gaze.

"Good?"

He nodded his assent and hid his face in your shoulder once again. "Mm. Very good." His voice was hoarse, and he found himself being gently pulled away from you to have a water bottle held to his lips. He begrudgingly took a few sips, then returned to his prior position with a soft sigh.

"You did so well for me, my sweet boy," you said with a smile as you put the bottle back on the end table, then began to gently play with his hair, "I wasn't easy on you, but you took it so beautifully for me. I love seeing you come undone."

Oswald grumbled, vaguely embarrassed, but you could feel his smile against your skin.

"Hey, you know I love you, right?" You cupped his face in his hands and gently nudged his chin upwards so that your eyes met. His cheeks were red, but he looked content.

"I do," he agreed quietly, and that alone made your heart soar before he could even say it back. It had taken you ages to reach this point, to gently repair the trust that had been shattered by so many others before you. Still, your chest did warm as you heard his meek: "And I love you."

You ran your fingers along his cheekbones to his temples as you leaned forward to gently kiss the tip of his nose, torn between finding the broken gasp it elicited adorable or heartbreaking. Even with how far you've come, it would take far more for him to truly believe that he was worthy of love. You knew that. But until that day came, you'd just have to love him enough for the both of you.

Headcanons on what I imagine being in a poly relationship with Silco and Sevika would be like (SFW):

A/n: Forewarning that this is probably gonna be kinda cracky, I'm just having some fun. I will possibly make a N-SFW one if y'all say you want one, just lemme know 👀 anyways-

You probably met them as some sort of business associate of theirs. Maybe you’re another Chembaron, maybe you’re a talented gun for hire, or maybe you’re even a secretary. Who knows!

These two are always busy doing something, whether that’s paperwork for Silco or literally kicking ass for Sevika, so I really hope you can juggle whatever you have going on alongside the general work that’s done under the roof of the Last Drop.

I just know that their sleep schedules are fucking wack man. Part of me wants to say that it would make sense if they were more nocturnal, but we see both of them out and about (Like during the Chembaron meeting) during the daytime; I’ve come to the conclusion that they sleep when they can, and not at specific times. If they can only sleep for five hours until they need to be up for the next shipment, then they only sleep five hours, y’know?

I can see y’all taking (possibly midnight) lunch together whenever you can though. These two would probably not be seen dead in a public place to eat unless it was somewhere high-end, so the solution is usually takeout.

Silco may have you sit in on his chase in his office upstairs while he works so he can spend time with you. Sevika will typically barge in with a jug of something strong and flop down next to you before giving an irritated rundown of what happened on her mission to Silco. She will 100% pull you into her lap while she does this. 

Speaking of sitting in Sevika’s lap, she likes to have you there when she’s playing cards downstairs. If you look up during a game, sometimes you can see Silco watching over the both of you from the balcony. Just to make sure his partners aren’t starting any brawls. At least that’s what he says to y’all. Really it’s because he loves seeing you and her together, having a good time.

There is merit to the previously mentioned worry of you both starting a brawl. Let’s just say that there was a stern talking-to from Silco afterward. He was upset about how this would make the club’s reputation falter, and even more upset when he figured out that your reasoning was “He was cheating, I swear,” when he, in fact, was not. You and Sevika were both banished to the ‘guest room’ that was the pullout in the basement’s side room.

Most people in Zaun see the rumors of Silco being in a relationship with his Right-hand woman and the mysterious other partner as just that: a rumor. “Silco is a heartless, cold, manipulative,” blah blah blah they drone on and on. You feel like you and Sevika have come to know the man pretty well considering the fact that he was always so closed off with his thoughts, but he wore his emotions on his face beyond control. You can see the little smirks he gets when you say something snippy. You can see the shine of satisfaction when Sevika defends herself and those she cares for against anyone and anything that could possibly cause harm. You can see the love in his eyes when he looks at You, Sevika, and his daughter Jinx. 

Sevika is one who never wears her emotions on her sleeve unless absolutely certain that she was in safe company. She usually expresses herself with a glare over Silco’s shoulder or by pushing you behind her as a way of guarding you against possible danger. Hell, she even shows her love for you both by beating the shit out of some fuck that said something too far about either of you. Sevika of course would never outright say that you and Silco are hers in fear of all three of your safeties, but if you or Silco were to say that you both were hers, she would just get a shit-eating grin before puffing her chest in confidence. 

In public, Silco and Sevika kept their steady Boss to Right-Hand relationship, but behind closed doors, it was shoulder pats, praising each other’s accomplishments, and kisses galore. Their most common form of affection with one another was when Sevika would bend down from beside Silco’s seat while he would tilt his head up and meet her for a soft kiss before she would then stroll out of the office to her next job. The first time you saw this happen you did a double-take in shock. Without looking up from his paperwork, “Would you like one too, lovely?” he offered. It took you a good minute to decide that he was, in fact, being serious. You eagerly jumped on the sweet opportunity that he’d allowed you in on from that point onwards.

One perk of being the partner of the essential king of the undercity is that you get to live in luxury. You want it? You got it darling. It’s that simple. All you need to do is look at him and ask politely, and all he asks in return is your love and maybe your plans for the said thing you want. Honestly, he loves spoiling his partners in his wealth to a healthy extent. Once for helping him file a few papers, he bought you a new outfit in thanks. You of course tried to say that you didn’t need it, and he of course shut that down with a lift of an eyebrow and a reassuring statement that if he didn’t want to get you something, he wouldn’t. Sevika is not at all exempt from his spoiling when in the privacy of your collective room. She has suits and golden accessories for days. 

Material things aren’t the only thing that he spoils y’all with. He would be petty enough to rent out an entire restaurant for the three of you, more than once I might add, without breaking a sweat. Those nights are filled with copious amounts of alcohol, good food, and catching up with one another.

Sevika and Silco enjoy being on top of the food chain, and they’re taking you with them while they go. You are always being guarded either by Sevika herself or by having a lacky watching from a safe distance away to where you can’t see them. When you ask Silco about it, he says he has no idea what you’re talking about. It’s for your own good that he has at least one eye on you at all times when he or Sevika aren’t near. If you were to ever find out, it could go one of two ways: If you’re understanding and accepting of the guarding, then it will continue with your input on who you’d trust with guarding you specifically if you had a favorite lacky. If you weren’t alright with it, let’s be honest, it would still happen. Silco would just get stealthier eyes to watch you.

At the end of the day, they would live, kill, and die for you if it meant that you’d return the sentiment. 

Masterlist

A masterlist of (most) I've left out some I'm not confident in/were mushed together through errors in the tumblr app. Reader is always gn unless stated otherwise in post

Oc Pronouns: X

OCS:

Quick Oc Intros - Lee, Host, Elliott (X)

Character Concepts - Yandere Incubus and Paralysis Demon - C.C, Verona (X)

Grand Prize: Yandere Show Host x Reader (Host intro) (X)

Host x Co-host reader (X)

Host Nsfw headcannons (X)

Host with flirty reader (X)

Lee headcannons (X)

Lee"s name (1)(2)(3)

Cutting your finger by Lee (X)

Cinema (Elliot Wiltshire intro) (X)

C.C (incubus) blurb (X)

C.C with anxious reader (X)

oc heights (X)

ocs with flustered reader headcannons (X)

oc's thought of starting a family (X)

oc's reaction if reader has a significant other (X)

ocs with a flirty reader (X)

Who would be willing to share an s/o (X)

which ocs are most willing to let their darling have a pet (X)

ocs react to the reader with the bubbly personality (X)

not writing descriptions for this (nsfw) (X)

how ocs kiss their darling (X)

Putting your hand on ocs thigh (X)

ocs with picky eater (X)

ocs with college student reader (X)

telling them you love them (X)

Mutli Part series:

Accidental Cult:

Starting the cult (X)

Your God gets jealous (X)

God lies to followers for worship (X)

Reader kills for their god (X)

Supernatural Harem Masterlist (X)

Supernatural Harem headcannons:

Baron(demon) nsfw (X)

Maddox (reaper) headcannons (X)

Alasdair (Gurdian Angel) (slight nsfw) (X)

Petting Alasdair"s wings (X)

harem with reader that cant swim (X)

kissing the harem a good morning (X)

harem with reader that likes to lay on their chest (X

painting the harems nails (X)

Alasdair true form (X)

harem stealing your clothes (X)

reader trapped on earth after death (X)

Jeremiah (priest) with angel reader (X)(2)(3)(4)

Misc:

Hurt: Male masochistic yandere bully x shy reader (X)

Opposites: violent male yandere x quiet reader (X)

Male yandere doll maker x doll reader (X)

Submissive male yandere x healer reader (X)

Beast: Male yandere x monster reader (X)

Show time: male yandere show host x reader (X)

Yandere Naga squeezing reader as a punishment (X)

Male yandere x crime boss reader (X)

Male yandere x delinquent reader (X)

Male yandere x superhuman reader (X)

Yandere male delinquent x reader (X)

Male servant yandere x Vampire s/o (X)

Male yandere x touch starved reader (X)

Forgiveness: Yandere cult x god reader (X) (2)

Male yandere fighter x healer reader (X)

yandere god taking interest in a cult member reader (X)

yandere God of death x reader (X)

Touch starved male yandere x supernatural reader (X)

The Beast's pet: yandere male x werewolf reader (X)

yandere supernatural creature x reader (X)

male yandere x vampire reader (X)

male yandere x crime boss reader (X)

Chase: male yandere x monster reader (X)

Pumpkin Carving: Yandere demon x reader (X)

My Guardian Angel: Yandere x reader (X)

Pretty Face: Yandere x serial killer reader blurb (X)

Symbiosis: Mutualism - Yandere cult x genderless deity reader (X) (2)

male yandere x shapeshifter reader (nsfw) (X)

Yandere male spider hybrid (X)

Male yandere x serial killer reader (nsfw) (X)

Yandere naga (X)

yandere husband X monster reader (X)

yandere merman x pirate captain reader (X)

male yandere exorcist x ghoul reader (X)

Masochistic Male Yandere x Friendly Sadistic Reader (X)

Yandere husband x Psychic Reader (X)

Flowers By Your Grave: Unnamed Male Yandere x Reader (X)

yandere male crime boss x male priest reader (X)

Fandom works:

Kai Satou - yttd (X)

Sullivan - Obsolete Dream (X)

Sal - Wadanohara (X)

Maekami - Obsolete Dream (X)

Masochistic Pro hero Hitoshi Shinso (X)

Masochistic Dabi (X)