Crab >:)

Recruit in need of medical assistance!

Ahhh yessss the canonically impossible interaction between the resistance and Chell, I love that

(Also I noticed that I forgot the black mesa logo on Alyx' shirt only after posting this, so let's just pretend it's there- )

ULYSSES DIES AT DAWN! AT LEAST, THAT’S THE WORD ON THE STREET FROM THOSE WHAT SAW WHAT WENT DOWN AT CALYPSO’S. NOW LISTEN UP, 'CAUSE WE’VE GOT A LABYRINTHINE TWISTED TASK OF A TALE TO TELL, AND IF YOU DON’T KEEP UP, YOU MIGHT GET LOST. FIRST, TO UNDERSTAND HOW THIS ALL GOES DOWN, YOU’VE GOT TO KNOW A LITTLE ABOUT THE PLANET WE’RE TALKING OF. SEE, ON THIS PLANET, THERE WAS A CITY, GRIM OLD CITY, SORT OF PLACE THE RAIN BEATS DOWN LIKE COFFIN NAILS AND THE AIR WAFTS WITH THE CIGARETTE STENCH OF BETRAYAL. MY KIND OF TOWN. NOW THIS CITY, GRIM OLD CITY, IT STARTS TO GROW. AND WHEN IT MEETS WITH OTHER TOWNS, OTHER CITIES, IT TAKES THEM INTO ITSELF, ABSORBS THEM, UNTIL SOON ENOUGH THERE’S NO LAND LEFT, SO THE CITY SPREADS OUTWARDS INTO THE SEA, AND WHEN THERE’S NO SEA LEFT, THE CITY SPREADS UPWARDS INTO THE SKY, AND WHEN THERE IS NO SKY LEFT… IT BURROWS INWARDS. LIKE A CANCER INTO THE BOWELS OF THE PLANET. AND EVENTUALLY, THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE CITY. AND SO GENERATIONS LIVE AND GENERATIONS DIE IN THE WARRENS AND THE TUNNELS AND EVEN THE LOWER LEVELS OF THE SURFACE, AND THEY NEVER SEE THE SUN. AND IT’S IN ONE OF THE DEEPEST, MOST SECRET OF THESE TUNNELS WE MEET OUR HERO. GOES BY THE NAME OF ULYSSES. CURRENTLY BEATEN, BATTERED, BLOODY. UNBOWED. SPITS OUT A MOUTHFUL OF TEETH AND DISDAIN AND LOOKS UP TO SEE FOUR OF THE MEANEST BASTARDS OF THE MEANEST STREETS OF THE MEANEST PARTS OF THE CITY. ALL IMMACULATELY TURNED OUT IN PINSTRIPES. WE’LL CALL THEM THE SUITS. YOU MIGHT ASK HOW THINGS CAME TO SUCH A PASS—I KNOW ULYSSES IS. WELL, IT STARTED IN A BAR, AS THESE THINGS SO OFTEN DO. CALYPSO’S—A RUN DOWN OLD GIN JOINT, PAYS ITS MONEY TO DIONYSUS—OUR HERO SLUMPED OVER A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY, TRYING TO DROWN ENOUGH SORROWS TO CHOKE A HORSE. AND ONE HORSE IN PARTICULAR.

[ID: Two people. One of them has an arm wrapped around the other's shoulder and is shouting and gesturing. The other one stares off expressionless. End ID]

I keep telling y'all I love this meme

blowing them up with my mind

This clip 😭😭😭🩷

going to sleep & by sleep. heh. well. let's just say. phone in bed

Screaming crying throwing up etc.

I had a dream a while ago that I was walking down a winding road in a forest in the middle of the night and there were several signs along the road. One of them had a picture of Dr house on it and it said “are you gay” and there were two buttons underneath labeled yes and no. And if you pressed the yes button a fire hose would spray at you

This is exactly what it looked like

call