Lift Confessions (Roger Taylor X Female!Reader)

Lift Confessions (Roger Taylor x Female!Reader)

Author’s Note: Okay so hello! This is my first piece of writing, so I guess you could say I’m fairly new to this whole writing thing. I’ll get used to it though, hopefully. I really hope you enjoy this. Comments and requests are appreciated!

Summary: You and Queen’s drummer Roger Taylor do not get along, and it’s unclear why until one night when the both of you are found stuck in a broken lift, alone together. 

(This can be read as either BoRhap!Roger, or real Roger. It’s all completely up to you)

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of Alcohol/ Intoxication, Smoking, Mild Self-Harm (?), Panic attacks, Break-Ups, Etc.

I would rate this fic T just because of the swearing and subject matter.

If you want to read the prequel, you can find it here

He was the one person you hated the most. 

 Why did you have to get stuck in a lift together now? 

 You had been Brian May's best friend since high school. After graduation, the both of you had unfortunately gone your separate ways.

 You'd reconnected a handful of years after university, only to discover that Brian joined a band as a guitarist. The band, according to him, was "not half bad". That band was Smile, which later on became Queen.

 You befriended the frontman, Freddie Mercury, faster than it took for you to introduce yourselves to one another. Not only did he enjoy your company, but your generosity when it came to willingly helping them set up, and pack up their sets when you attended their small pub gigs.

 You did it so many times that it just became a norm for you to tag along with the band in order to be of assistance to them. That was also how you ended up becoming a "full-time roadie" for the band, as John Deacon liked to put it.

 One of your most important jobs, according to Brian, was not just to manage their coordination and placement on stage, but to follow them around like a lost puppy, all day, everyday. Although the guitarist insisted your presence everywhere was beneficial to your work, as well as theirs, Freddie told you at a later date that Brian just really liked having you around again.

 All of the boys liked having you around.

 All except for him. 

 You could see him, Roger Taylor, the drummer of Queen, forcibly laugh, and shake his head from the corner of your eye; and before he opened his big mouth to start complaining like always, you raised your finger up.

 "One word, Meddows, and I will strangle you." 

 "It was your fault, y/l/n!"

 "How so?!"

 "You pressed the buttons last!" What a weak argument. "I should have taken the fucking stairs like everyone else."

 It was clear Freddie, Brian, and John took the stairs to narrowly avoid the arguing between you and the hot-headed blond. Even when there were others around, it was hard for the both of you not to bitch at one another.

 You didn't even understand why you two chose to ride the lift down together. Neither of you ever complained about it, though... you had noticed, however, that it was becoming a rather common occurrence.

 You assumed it was better to ride the lift with Roger, and suffer for a handful of seconds rather than having to endure a long, dreadful walk down the stairs with him, anyways.

 You reached out, and tried the open door button, like you had moments before. It didn't do anything. You hit the button again. And again. And again.

 "Don't expect shit to change, y/n! Jesus Christ--"

 "Do you have any other bright ideas, Car-Fucker?" Your words were cold as you turned to stare down the blond who'd retreated to the back corner of the lift.

 Roger's mouth twitched threateningly, and you turned back to the refusing doors. You huffed, and hit the call button before moving to sit at the very opposite of Roger in the lift.

 He watched as you sat yourself on the floor, and cross your arms over your chest.

 "Take a photo. It'll last longer."

 He simply shook his head, leaning himself against the wall and staring at the yellow light in the ceiling.

 "... Bitch."

 "Dick."

 And then there was silence.

 Roger spent nearly ten minutes staring at either the wall in front of him or the ceiling light, and you picked at the dirt underneath your fingernails.

 There was something very uncomfortable about the lift's silence. It was so odd to be in the same room as Roger and not be verbally attacking him the entire time, and vice versa.

 Roger, after standing against the wall for about five minutes more, moved to the button panel next to the door. You opened your mouth, in preparation to ask him what he was doing, but when he began to mash the open door, and call button, and then kicking the steel doors as hard as he could afterwards, you knew very well not to piss him off.

 You had never physically attacked one another, and today was not going to be the day that reality would change.

 "What a load of fucking bullocks," Roger's voice shook, and his shoulders heavily rose and fell with his chest. He pounded his fist one more time against the door before pacing back to his original spot against the wall. You watched him sit on the floor, and after realizing you were watching him, he crossed his arms like you had before.

 "Take a photo. It'll last longer."

 The mock made you even more uncomfortable. Not because he quoted the bitchy line you used beforehand, no.

 Something about him not only seemed irritated, but anxious... And it struck an unpleasant nerve in you.

 You had never seen the Roger Taylor unnerved in your life... and you didn't like it.

 Roger's gaze was now on his hands, which he'd resided to wringing in his lap. His right foot tapped rapidly on the lift's floor, as if he was getting more restless as time ticked by.

 Soon enough, the drummer was back on his feet, pacing towards the button panel and pressing the call button over and over, like it was the only thing he knew how to do.

 "... Rog--"

 "Come on, open up!" Roger began to slap the lift's doors with the palm of his hand, his pleads strained with distress. Sooner than later, he tore himself away from the panel to sit back on the floor. His movements were quick, and only then could you see the panic in his glassy eyes.

 That's when you realized it.

 Roger was claustrophobic.

 You could see him looking at the lift's walls as if they were way too close for his liking. His feet began to tap against the floor like before, and he swallowed thickly before squeezing his eyes shut.

 "Open up," you could hear the blond whisper to no one in particular. He brought his legs up to his chest, and buried his face into his knees.

 "Oh god, get me the fuck outta here."

 Considering the situation, Roger must have really thought his song about his "love for cars" was strong enough to be on the B-side of Bohemian Rhapsody if he was willing to sit in a tight cupboard for hours until Freddie agreed to cooperate with his wishes.

 But seeing Roger shake in his panic made you feel sick, and even though you felt unwillingly sympathetic towards him, you also felt like you were compelled to do something.

 When Roger lifted his head up next, you were relocated, right next to him, your brows furrowed with-- as much as you hated to admit-- worry.

 "Take some deep breaths. Can you do that for me, Roger?"

 When he didn't answer, and his silent tears spilled over his waterlines, you sighed, and slowly reached out to rest your hand on his shaking shoulder.

 "I'll breathe with you. Okay? Just breathe in..." you took a deep breath in through your nose, watching as Roger began to cooperate. As he did this, you rubbed his shoulder comfortingly. 

 "... And out."

 You both exhaled through your mouths, although his came out shakily. You could feel the smallest of smiles on your lips, and you nodded your head in approval.

 "Good. Do that a few more times, Rog."

 Roger slowly drew in, and released some deep breaths, like you had asked. You found relief to see the distress physically cease from his being. A few minutes passed, and after Roger had calmed down, he rubbed at his eyes with the pads of his hands.

 "... You gonna be good, Meddows?"

 His gaze moved to your face, and his eyes narrowed as he stared into your own. He opened his mouth, and closed it. He did it a handful of times before frowning, and clenching his jaw.

 "... Why are you being nice to me all of a sudden?"

 His question wasn't meant to be condescending; even you knew that. Honestly, if you were Roger, you would have been asking the same question.

 The tone in his voice was soft... which threw you off guard. You hadn't heard Roger speak in such a gentle manner towards you for... a very long time. You felt like you were talking to a different person entirely.

 "I..."

 Roger raised his eyebrow expectantly, and that made you hesitate even more. He was listening to you.

 He never listened to you.

 "I was..."

 You stopped again.

 You didn't know whether or not you wanted to tell him the truth. If you told him you felt sympathy for him, you feared it'd only inflate his already-large ego, and he wouldn't be grateful for your actions at all.

 "... I could hear your mumbling as clear as day over there." You decided to go the harsher route.

 "I wanted the noise to stop."

 Roger's eyebrows lowered, and he opened his mouth as if to speak...

 But no words came out. 

 You sighed again, and shifted to a kneeling position in order to pull yourself back up to your feet, but once you were halfway up, Roger suddenly grabbed your elbow, and gently pulled you back down to the floor.

 You landed next to the drummer with a thud, and you stared quizzically at the hand cuffing your appendage.

 Your eyes moved from Roger's now soft grip on your arm, to his face, your eyebrows lowering in confusion. Your stare was enough to ask the question you were thinking. 'What?'

 "... What even went wrong between us, y/n?"

 That was a question you were not expecting to hear.

 "... Excuse me?"

 "You heard me."

 You pursed your lips, and looked back down at Roger's hand, which was still planted at your joint.

 "I don't even know why you and I even started fighting," he confessed gently.

 After a beat, as if he had been thinking about doing this beforehand, his fingers began to glide down the length of your forearm. Very slowly.

 For the first time in your feud, you let Roger touch you. The contact, although minimal, brought an ironic sense of comfort to you.

 "I just woke up one morning... and it was like we'd hated each other since birth..."

 Roger watched himself trace mindless patterns slowly over the back of your hand once his fingertips reached it.

 You would have been repulsed by his actions if he would have been doing this minutes beforehand; but now... you honestly didn't want him to stop.

 "We hit it off the day we met... why did that have to change?"

 You could hear your heart beating hard, and loud, and fast against your rib cage, which was an issue since Roger's voice was barely even a whisper.

 The blood rush in your ears only grew more intense when Roger unexpectedly, yet slowly, curled his warm fingers around your own. Even if you wanted to pull away from Roger, you didn't think you had the strength to move.

 "... You don't remember what happened... do you?" 

You asked, just as quietly as he had. At the response, Roger's gaze moved up to meet yours, his face branded with confusion.

 "I don't." 

 "You were shitfaced. No wonder you don't remember..."

 You finally pulled your hand away from Roger's touch, and the fingers that were once keeping yours warm hovered in the air for a moment.

 The blond eventually dropped his hand in his lap, pursing his lips, and silently waiting for you to continue your explanation. With a sigh, you continued. 

"Remember Steven?" The name made the corner of Roger's mouth twitch unpleasantly. 

 "How could I forget him?" he said tightly. 

Your stomach sank at Roger's tone, and you took a deep breath or two as a natural remedy for your mild nausea.

 "... Why do you think you haven't seen him in, what, two years?" 

 Roger's cold gaze softened, and he parted his lips after putting two and two together.

 "You two--" 

 "He left me," you finished. Roger ran his tongue over his teeth before hollowing out his cheeks in thought.

 "... What's this have to do with me, though?" 

 "We were hanging out at that one pub you guys met me in. You were doing a gig that particular night, and I was helping you guys pack up." Roger tried his best to remember the night that ended your friendship. 

 The night that birthed your rivalry.

 "The last time I remember you ever being nice to me, I went to get you a drink from the bar..." Roger's face twisted. He was clearly bothered that he couldn't remember much about that night.

 "You got blackout drunk," you reminded the drummer with a tight-lipped smile. "... you offered to buy me one drink, but one turned into five, and God knows how many for you." Roger then smiled the slightest bit, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand. That did sound like him.

 "And at some point in the night, I went out for a smoke... I think Brian called Steven to come and pick me up."

 Roger's mouth twitched again, and he nodded his head slowly after his smile completely disappeared again. 

"... alright."

 "You stumbled out of the pub at some point. Sat down on the curb right next to me..." The entire night was coming back to you, almost as if it were a film you hadn't seen in years, but just the mention of a scene or two had you remembering every little detail about it. You could have recapped the whole night to Roger; everything that happened in blunt detail. In times like this, you were glad to have the gift among few that allowed you to easily remember things while under the influence.

 And in times like this, you were a little disheartened that Roger was not one of those people.

 "... You were getting a little clingy. Physically." You laughed a little, your eyes trained on the loose dirt on the lift's floor. You didn't want to see the look on Roger's face from then until the end of your recollection.

 "Shocked me, really, seeing as you're very much a "hands off" kinda guy when it comes to romantic stuff. You had your arm around me, your head on my shoulder..." You took a deep breath, and cleared your throat awkwardly. Following this was a strained huff of laughter. 

"... Then you kissed me."

 It was hard to keep your eyes off Roger's face in that moment, especially since he didn't say anything in response. You hoped to God the blond believed you, and didn't think you were trying to make a joke out of this whole situation. But knowing Roger, if he had suspected this to be a joke, he would have called you out on it already. 

"You actually cut me off during a conversation with it..." You frowned again, your fingers moving to clasp together in your lap. You shook your head, and huffed another sarcastic laugh.

 "And I was with Steven at the time. I-- I knew it was wrong for that to happen... But I kissed you back."

 Your fingers began to curl in at the memory, and you watched as your fingernails began to press harshly against the skin of the knuckles on your opposite hand. 

 "And Steven-- he fucking showed up at the worst of times! He showed up while we were sucking face, and I had to spend the rest of my night fighting with him!" 

You hadn't noticed your calm tone had blossomed into a shout. Even when you shot up to your feet, bounded towards the steel doors to the lift, and kicked them as hard as you could, you couldn't tell how scary you'd become.

 You listened to the sound of the door's assault ricochet through the elevator shaft, and you dropped your tense shoulders when nothing could be heard anymore.

 Roger said nothing.

 The people who may or may not have been outside the lift said nothing.

 You said nothing.

... You said nothing for a very long time.

 And when you did, your tone was miserable, and your voice was full of tears.

 "I told h-him I l-loved him! I s-started to believe it l-less and less with every time I s-said it...!" You peered through your tears at Roger's disfigured reflection in the lift's door. Even though your back was to him, he still watched you as if you were facing him. You took a few deep breaths to relax yourself, and when you decided you'd spent enough time calming down, you spoke again, in a better-controlled tone. 

 "He ended things. He told me you could have me."

 You frowned, crossing your heavy arms over your chest. 

"... He said it like I was some kind of toy he was just tossing away."

 You opened your mouth, but hesitated with your next words. 

"... I couldn't help but blame you at first, for everything that happened." A pause.

 "And then I blamed the both of us... I blamed us for a very long time."

 You finally turned to look at Roger, who was staring at you with empty eyes. When he still didn't respond, you continued.

 "Months after the separation... and my pointing of fingers... I knew I fucked up. You were my friend, and just because we kissed while we were drunk, our friendship was sacrificed to make me feel better about myself."

 You swallowed thickly, your eyes surveying his to see if he was going to say anything yet.

 Nothing.

 "I realized it was me who tore us apart. And when I finally came to terms with myself, I thought it was too late, and you could never forgive me." 

 One of Roger's eyebrows slowly raised, and you shifted from one foot to the other. 

 "All this time I'd pretended to hate you because you hate me. I was too scared to ever apologize because I feared rejection..." You looked around the lift, and pinched your bottom lip between your teeth.

 "... And here we are, now. You know what happened, and..." you rested your eyes on Roger one more time. "... I just want you to know that I forgive you. And... I'm so sorry, Roger."

 The blond's eyes softened, and he shifted a little to sit up straighter against the wall.

 "... C'mere," he finally spoke.

 After a pause, you uncrossed your arms, and moved to sit next to Roger again. He gestured down to your hand with his eyes, and you raised it up, to which he took in his own grasp.

 The physical affection shocked you, even if Roger had been doing this with you minutes prior. The touching was just so unlike him, even if he were doing this with someone he genuinely liked.

 "... God, y/n I don't even know where to begin..."

 "... Begin?" You questioned, to which Roger nodded his head.

 "My Doll, I never hated you. The distancing was a charade. I've lied to myself every day for the last two years. I told myself I never cared about you, and I don't love you. I thought that was what you wanted. I kept it up. I never believed it; those lies. I never could. You're just too... special."

 You watched with an open mouth and big round eyes as Roger raised your hand to his mouth and pressed a tender kiss to your knuckles. He then opened your hand and slowly kissed the tips of your fingers, his glossy blue eyes watching your face as his lips made contact with your skin. 

 "Roger..." 

 "My Doll, I have been in love with you since the moment I set eyes on you, and I never stopped."

 Your heart pounded in your chest. You feared it was loud enough that Roger could hear it.

 While his one hand held onto yours, his other hovered just above your waist. His eyes moved from his free hand to your eyes. You granted him permission to touch you with a small, single nod. At the signal, Roger's fingers gently settled onto your clothed skin, and he squeezed your hand.

 "Steven made me so goddamn jealous, y/n. How much I wanted to be him when he'd pick you up after our gigs, holding the car door for you like you were a princess. How I desperately wanted an oversized rain jacket so during pouring days I could offer you space in my arms and warm you up until we got somewhere dry..."

 As Roger continued on, your eyes began to tear up. At first you assumed all of Roger's wishes had you missing Steven; but your heart knew that was wrong.

 You wanted these things to happen as much as Roger did.

 "What I would give to dance with you under a streetlight in the middle of the night like a cliché film," Roger let go of your hand, and reached up to curl a piece of loose hair around your ear. "Or what I would give to taste your strawberry-flavoured lip gloss I can smell from a room away." While he mentioned your lips, Roger didn't shy away from admiring your slightly opened mouth.

 He swallowed, and looked up to you, his eyelids falling ever so lightly as his hands found their way to your elbows, and the two of you found yourselves gravitating towards one another.

 "Y/n..."

 Your mouths were just inches from each other when the lift jolted, and it began to move down to the ground floor. You and Roger watched as the floor numbers became smaller and smaller, and you rose to your feet, offering a hand to Roger to help him up as well.

 He held your hand for a moment or so after he properly got to his feet, and he looked down at you. You returned his gaze, and he opened his mouth to speak.

 The lift's doors finally opened and a man in a maintenance outfit greeted you and Roger with a curt nod of his head and a twirl of his wrench. "Sorry 'bout that, kids. Lift's been actin' up lately. Thanks for bein' patient." He moved out of the way, and you and Roger left the building after thanking him.

 The two of you stepped out into the pouring rain, and you cursed.

 "After all that time, I forgot my helmet upstairs." You turned to make your way back into the studio, but Roger grabbed your hand. "Princess, you're not biking home in the rain. I'm taking you."

 You didn't argue. Roger unzipped his jacket and stretched it to the side. "There's room in this jacket for the both of us."

 You just grinned, and slipped into the area under his arm, and the both of you rushed to Roger's car while he did his very best to shield you from the elements. 

He opened the car door for you, and made sure you were in fine before closing the door and climbing in on his side. He blew hot air into his hands and rubbed his palms together, glancing over to you.

 You were looking out the window until you took notice of the vehicle's silence, and you turned to look at Roger, matching his toothy grin. You laughed and shook your head 

 "What?!"

 "I'm just so glad to have you back in my life."

 "I never left, Meddows," you teased.

 "You know what I mean." You reached over and grasped his hand, giving it a squeeze as he started the car. Before putting the car into drive, he glanced at you. "I'm glad too, Roger."

 The next little while was you directing Roger to your house as you listened to the music on the radio, Roger's thumb rubbing the back of your hand gently. You could tell he was enjoying your company, as did he with you. 

 Eventually, you told him which driveway to pull into, and Roger was almost reluctant to put his car into park. He didn't want to leave you just yet. 

 "Hey,"

 You looked at him with a tilted head, and you kissed the back of his hand, something you weren't expecting to do this morning when you greeted him with your regular insults. 

 "I just miss this," he explained, gesturing between the both of you.

 "I miss being near you, and touching you, and..." He stopped talking on his own, and he moved his eyes up to look into yours.

 "... D'ja wanna go to dinner, y/n?"

 Your face burned hot, but you never hesitated in nodding, trying your best to hold back a grin. Roger on the other hand, wasn't scared to show his teeth when he grinned. He smiled so much it looked like it hurt.

 "Brilliant," he exclaimed with an exhale. 

"How does Friday night sound? Seven o'clock. I'll take you to a really special place for a really special lady." He winked at you to which you laughed in reply. 

"That sounds perfect, Roger."

 He got out of the car, and opened your door in the pouring rain, offering you protection from the weather in his jacket again. After escorting you to the door, Roger watched as you unlocked your door. He shoved his hands in his pockets, and watched as you turned to look at him one last time.

 "Friday?"

 "Friday," you confirmed, leaning up, and kissing Roger's cheek. He rested his hand where you kissed him, and watched you leave with starstruck eyes, and a goofy smile on his lips. "Drive safe, Lover Boy."

 You closed the door to your place, and you leaned against the wall in the main hall. 

You were already impatient for seven o'clock Friday.

                                                                Author’s After-Notes: Let me know if you want a sequel. I’d be down to write some more