I'll Be Honest With You I Hate The Whole Influencer Culture. A Lot Of Them Deserve Their Platform, But

that is sweet. i don't have any sort of hope that i'll ever make it big enough to join the MCU, but if it ever does happen i'll owe all of that to you for being my biggest hype man. it is a nice dream to transform into a superhero, though. right? i loved how fear was the first spin-off of the series, and it was original and it showed the decline of civilization, which after the original series you got to see a little more of the story. everything beyond that is just trash. i love jeffrey, lauren, and everyone involved in the spin-off's at the moment, but at what point do you realize you are just slinging shit at this point? i'll even repay you with a lead spot if my script ever makes it to film. been working real hard on my debut project, so if it ever see's the light of day i'm calling you first.

you say that, but let’s be real — the day marvel doesn’t notice you is the day they've failed. you’ve got that aussie fire, the screen presence that could silence a whole comic-con hall, and let’s not forget — deadly creatures recognize their own. if netflix is your playground, then marvel should be sending flowers and fan mail just for the chance to get in line. and yeah, you’re right again — it’s heartbreaking when these stories that meant something start to feel like conveyor belt content. the walking dead was lightning in a bottle at one point, and then suddenly it became “how many spin-offs can we throw at the wall before people notice it’s the same formula with new haircuts?” it’s exhausting watching something that once felt epic turn into an obligation. i hope they pull it together too. i really do. if we get the next spidey script and it feels like that, like something with soul again? i’ll know someone in the room actually cared. and trust me, if that day comes — i’ll be fighting to make sure your name ends up on that cast list. hell might freeze over, but maybe that’s just what we need to wake the industry up.

fighting for tickets with ticketmaster is a pain. you almost have to have the best luck in the world to beat out the resellers. i wish they would put a stop to that, but alas that is the way of the world. someone is always out to get someone, or try and profit off of someone else's success. congrats on the tour, though! i know the world has been itching for another gaga tour, myself included. oh man— i just recently saw sabrina carpenter in concert and that was such an amazing experience. i just love her. i also just scored tickets for me and my dad to see metallica this summer for his fathers day gift, so i'm pretty excited for that as well. he's been a huge metallica fan for sometime.

I'm kind of losing my mind over how my TikTok notifications are blowing up since I announced that I'd be touring MAYHEM and people have been able to get tickets. Or not get tickets. It's never a perfect process and someone's always inevitably disappointed not to make it, but I'm so excited to sing and dance with those that did win the Ticketmaster war. All of that said, what's been your favorite concert experience – it could have been as a child, teen, or more recently... I wanna know! Anyone still touring that I just have to see? @hfrpstarters

debnamcarey: the worst thing that could ever happen in television history. 😭 @.icygurlsaweetie

icygurlsaweetie: girl.....what happened? 👀 @DebnamCarey

girl, if you want to try pilates then let me know. i have this adorable studio that i go to and the ladies who teach it are the best. they snatched my waist so quick. exactly. i don't know what's going on, but if you need someone to vent to then i'm here. odds are i've probably been in the same boat as you, so we can swap war stories.

i think i should try pilates because i have been seeing people's results and they look fantastic. yeah i've been eating and drinking them today, but tomorrow it's back to the gym and working on my businesses. can't let one thing stop me from working on what i love.

alycia: you have and will always be my favorite muse. am i? please tell me you got rid of all the ones where i've just woken up and my hairs a mess. if those ever got out my reputation would be ruined. ☺️ you always know what to say to me to make me feel like the most beautiful girl in the room. alycia: been looking for something fun to do and exploring an unknown city with you sounds like the best way to spend my off time. you had me sold at balcony view. could think of a million things to do on that balcony with you. 😝

Jamie: You're going to make me blush, darling. Though I feel pretty good knowing that you've got so many photos of me on your phone, I can say the same about you on my phone. And we both know I'd much rather look at you too, since you always look stunning. Jamie: It's never too bold for you to show up, love, because you know I always want to see you. And seeing the sights of Prague sounds a lot better with you anyway, it would have been boring if I'd done it alone. I'll be seeing you soon then, and I'll send you my hotel information. I think you'll enjoy the place I'm staying in, the view from the balcony is pretty amazing.

alycia: likewise. i feel like working on a new album is special update worthy. i bet all the fans are super excited about that after you've all sort of done your own thing for a while. i'm sure it's gonna be amazing, and i can't wait to hear whatever you guys cook up. not a whole lot on my end. i've just been a busy little bee work wise. i think the newest, biggest news i've gotten so far is that i've been cast in the new godzilla vs. kong film.

luke: aye, good to hear from you. i'm good and the family is good. don't really have any special updates except that i'm working on the next 5SOS album. should be dropping that sometime in the later year/next year. what about you? what's happening in your world?

i do hope to have kids someday. i never gave it much thought until recently, but the more i witness my friends starting and expanding their families, it really has me thinking about that for myself. i do hope that i don't birth little terrors, but i suppose if i do have little chuckies, i'll love them just the same. it's the nature of this business, unfortunately, but it's also the most exciting part? it helps me not remain complacent, and i always fight for the next job. thank you! if you and oliver are up to it when it premieres, i would love for you both to be there. i want all of my favorite people in attendance for the big moment. i think that is a very natural way to feel, but sometimes the best things happen to us when we least expect it. he might still be young and a family may not have been on his radar at the moment, but i'm a firm believer that when you find the right person none of that matters. the way he talks about you, you are definitely his person. you already know that i'm going to be there! i'm trying my best to win title of the best auntie, so i gotta start while the little bean is still in the womb. you are right. i guess i just want to find someone so i can grow old with them. i don't want half of my life to be over before i find it. that's fair— but i'm gonna keep an eye out for that diamond ring instagram post.

i really did. they're spectacular kids. i lucked out but i highly doubt that your little ones, if you choose to have any, will be monsters! they will definitely test your patience, i'll promise you that one. but i can't see them being awful. i bet it was! that's a lot of pressure to have on anyone, not knowing when their next job is going to show up if at all. but i am so happy that you have something to do and look forward to! it's definitely going to be a fantastic time for you, i'm sure! i am looking forward to seeing it as soon as it comes out! i did, it was wonderful! you really did shine so bright in that role. so i just want you to know that all of your hard work paid off. i know that, i knew in the back of my mind that he wouldn't head for the hills but i didn't want him to feel like he absolutely had to stay if he didn't want to. he's still young and there is plenty of time for him to have a whole life and a family down the road, all of this was very quick and i didn't want him to feel like he was losing a huge portion of his life. but i am extremely happy that he's going to stick around and we're both excited to find out what our little slice of bread is going to be next month! i really do hope that you'll come to the gender reveal party! i know Oliver would just be so upset if you didn't. i won't say that i've been burned but i really just wasn't looking to get back into the dating world after my divorce and so it took me a bit longer to get back out there. i'm glad that i did though. you're still young yourself, i know i talk about this like we all aren't around the same age but there is always time. one of my friend's grandmothers remarried at like sixty. so there is always time to find your true love. i won't jump to weddings just yet. how about we get this little piece of toast out of me first and then we'll jump into that one.

i knew you were the right person for the job. i think if i twist this script into a rom com, you'd be the perfect boyfriend to sweep some lady off of her feet. the type that the audience roots for the entire time. thank you so much! i am still buzzing about landing the role. i had no idea when i auditioned that i would even make the cut. i was going against some pretty big names for that role, so being among the few who were picked— it's legendary. plus i do get to go toe to toe with titans— and hopefully i'm the one working with godzilla, and not against him. i did. walking away was difficult, and i didn't have much going for me job wise, so it was a huge risk. fear was a constant paycheck and i was taking a huge leap of faith on myself, but it worked out well in my favor. i appreciate you, more than you know. your friendship has meant so much to me. ha— i'll just tell them to put you in the next one. i have connections with them now.

you know i’m ride or die — opening scene, closing credits, hell, i’d even be that guy who gets resurrected in the post-credits scene if that’s what it takes. i’m committed. but seriously, i’m holding you to that promise. this character? no dying off early. he’s sticking around until the end, making it count with a slow-motion walk to insert epic finale here. we’re talking legendary status. and hey, godzilla vs. kong? that’s next-level cool. you get to go toe-to-toe with radioactive titans, and i’m honestly just waiting to see what kind of destruction you bring to the screen. talk about an iconic moment — forget the MCU, this is where the real action’s at. you’re gonna crush it. i can already see you owning that role and being the one everyone remembers when the credits roll. i feel you on all of that. when something starts losing its authenticity, it’s hard to stay invested. you’re right — alicia deserved way more than what they were handing out. there’s a point where you just have to step back and go, “i’m worth more than this.” you saw that and walked away, and that takes guts. if it ever gets to the point where they realize they messed up and bring that fire back, they’ll owe you an apology for not recognizing the potential when it was staring them right in the face. but hey, if you ever need a sounding board, or just someone to send you the most ridiculous motivational messages when you're feeling like you’re in the trenches, i’m here. honestly, I’m so glad to be cheering you on — don’t ever forget that you’re gonna go far. and if i ever start getting jealous of your epic godzilla vs. kong role, i’ll just blame it on the radioactive fallout.

you would be in even if you didn't make it past the opening scene? that's a real ride or die right there. i promise not to let whatever character you play kick the bucket too soon, or at all. he has to make it all the way to the closing credits. i never seen myself becoming a superhero. i always thought i'd standby and watch everyone get picked for marvel and i'd be the one on the sidelines with serious fomo. but one thing i do have that most of those mcu frequent flyers don't have is a brand new role in the latest godzilla versus kong film! i get to play around with large, radioactive titans. how's that for cool? oh— i've been calling fear out on their bullshit for years. it's a big reason as to why i walked away in the first place. i knew the story was no longer real and the effort in alicia's development just wasn't there anymore. she deserved better, and i would have rather her die than watch them run her into the ground. oh stop— you are the sweetest. i don't know what i would do without you.

alright, now i’m holding you to that — lead spot locked in. i don’t care if i’m playing a brooding anti-hero, a sarcastic sidekick, or a guy who dies five minutes in but makes it count — i’m in. and you better call me first, even if it’s just to cry happy tears over the phone when the script gets greenlit. honestly, i’d be honoured. and yeah, becoming a superhero? that’s the kind of childhood dream meets hollywood magic stuff that never really gets old. even putting the suit on for the first time… you feel like a kid who snuck into a candy store and somehow got hired to stay. it’s wild. as for fear, i totally agree — the early seasons had something raw to them, like you were witnessing the world fall apart in real time. it was clever, patient, and gave space for real character work. but now? yeah. feels like they’re just throwing extra toppings on a pizza that was cooked three seasons ago. at some point, you’ve got to stop dressing it up and admit the base is cold, you know? i love that you can see the beauty in the beginning and call out the mess when it turns. that’s the mark of a real storyteller. so don’t sell yourself short — the mcu would be lucky to have you. and if they don’t see that? their loss. netflix or not, you’ve got that spark — and i’ll be the loudest voice in the room reminding them of it.

those people don't matter. the only person that matters is you, and you've always treated me like i was the most important thing to you, and that means more to me than you will ever know. you made it very difficult not to fall in love with you, and let me tell you i tried not to. i was afraid i'd get hurt again, and i deprived myself of years of happiness because of that fear. i don't want that fear to define my future or my happiness anymore. i just know that i want you. if you will have me. that future that you see for yourself? i see it too. a beautiful gothic wedding, a couple of blonde haired, blue eyed babies that look just like you. it's very achievable, and i'm so willing to give you that life.

Yeah? I'm happy to hear that I've always made you feel like a queen when you're with me, darling, because that's how you should always feel. Plus, you know how much it pisses me off when I think about all the people that have treated you poorly or haven't treated you like you deserved to be treated. And you should never be made to feel like a last option, you know that, love. Well, I don't think the rest of the world would be ready if I showed up wearing nothing at all, darling, so we'll keep that for your eyes only. You're the best hype woman, there's no doubt about that, and you always make me feel more sure of myself. You love my ears? Though I approve of you thinking they're nibble-worthy, of course. I'd say the same for me, but I've not been lying to myself. I've known what I've felt for you, I just haven't felt like I could tell you because it would ruin things. And that's what I told myself, that I'd rather have you in whatever way I could than not have you at all, so I'd just shut up and take whatever you were willing to give. I just didn't think you saw me as anything more than your friend Jamie, who made you feel better sometimes, you know? But it makes me happy hearing I'm the person you always come to when you're happy or you get good news, and very happy I'm who you come to for comfort. You've been my person for years now, darling, that's something I've known and honestly accepted a while ago. I do the same thing when it comes to my future, and I'll admit I've been thinking about my future and settling down a lot, and you're who I see that with. Until now I just told myself it was an unachievable dream.