This is literally the plot of Megamind
You are kidnapped by the villain regularly, but you’re starting to look forward to it. You know they won’t hurt you, and are simply being dramatic. It also doesn’t help that you are the only person they ever kidnap. This time, the hero doesn’t bother trying to save you.
Beautiful. Beautiful.
Those tags~
@proshipper-on-ship thank you for the Dick & Dan idea you added to my other post, please enjoy some of the fall out your comment resulted in haha
“So,” Bruce tried, looking hesitantly pleased at the surprisingly light atmosphere around the table. “Anything new and exciting going on with anyone?”
There was a smattering of answers from around the table. Jason didn’t offer anything - which wasn’t surprising, that he was even there and largely not starting a fight was more than enough as far as Dick was concerned - but with some ribbing from Steph, Tim eventually admitted to finally asking that boy he’d been interested in out. Dick joined in on teasing his little brother - and even Jay gave, for him, some gentle ribbing over finally getting the balls to do something, eh Timberland? - while very carefully avoiding mentioning his own sorta-kinda thing with Dan in Bludhaven. He’d deal with his siblings making him miserable and embarrassed over it all when he actually scored a date with him thanks very much.
Things were going good.
And then Damian cleared his throat, looking imperious and uninterested at the same time as he waited for everyone to turn to look at him.
“I have an announcement on an alteration to my personal life.” He declared, chin up and looking like he was already over this whole family-bonding-time thing, which was fair. Damian had gotten better over the years, but he was still not exactly the cute and cuddly little brother. Dick still had the scar from the last time he tried to hug Dami without warning a year ago and got stabbed for the effort. Still, he was sharing, willingly even! That’s progress!
At the head of the table Bruce tilted his head, looking as cautiously hopeful as Dick felt over the youngest Wayne actually offering to share something personal. “Have you decided on what college you want to go to then?”
“No.” Dami dismissed easily, without more than a glance in Bruce’s direction. “Night and I have decided to take some time to travel before continuing any further schooling.”
Huh, honestly, Dick was kinda surprised. With how much of a perfectionist Dami was, he’d thought he’d throw himself into college with the same ferocious, competitive drive he did everything else. But then again, if Elle Nightingale was going to be taking a gap year or two, it wasn’t as if it was that much of a surprise that Dami would go and join her.
The two gremlins had been practically inseparable since they were twelve and discovered a shared love of stabbing people and adopting every animal they see. If Dami’s best friend was going to go gallivanting across the world like she always dreamed of doing, Dick couldn’t actually be that surprised that Dami would be going with her.
Dick took a sip of his drink as Dami opened his mouth to continue with what was probably going to be to most people the world’s most harrowing game of “how many incredibly dangerous animals can we see before we end up dead on our gap year” that the two demons were undoubtedly planning.
He regretted taking that sip almost immediately as Damian said, “Night and I took our marital vows yesterday. She sends her regrets that she was unable to join us for family dinner tonight.”
Predictably, the room broke out into utter chaos.
Dick choked on his drink, spraying across the table and splattering Babs with a shower of wine. She didn’t even seem to notice, dropping her own glass as she snapped her head over to stare at Damian, the sound of breaking glass and a deep red stain pooling across the table following as she did. At the end of the table, Jay made a noise like a dying goose as the samosa he’d just popped in his mouth threatened to kill him. Cass, perhaps the most outwardly calm at the proclamation, only stared with wide eyes at her younger brother as she hit Jason on the back in an attempt to make sure he didn’t die.
Dick could practically hear the old shrieking AOL dial up noise that was Tim’s brain attempting to process what his little brother had just said, while sitting next to him Steph gave a small shriek of you what? Duke’s head was on a swivel, eyes darting from Damian, to another family member, to Damian and back again as if unsure who to even look at in the moment.
Bruce just…stared, frozen in place, face caught in the most open look of shock Dick thinks the man has ever shown in his life.
—
Damian sniffed and cast a caustic look towards - of all people - Jason, “Unlike some people, I share my good news with the family in a timely manner.”
Jay sputtered, “You know what, fuck you! Fine, you want me to share the news?” Jay snapped his head towards the rest of them. “Jazz is pregnant, baby is due next month on the sixth. Baby shower’s next weekend at Robinson Park, show up or don’t, I really don’t give a fuck.”
Or maybe he was just going to try to kill them with a heart attack.
“What the fuck?!”
“Language!”
“Who the fuck is Jazz?!”
“Language!”
“Night’s elder sister and guardian, Drake, keep up. You should know this, you’re dating her brother.”
“I’m what?”
“And Grayson is having flirtations with her other brother.”
“Dan is Elle’s older brother? Wait - how do you know about that?”
“Todd and I are in the Nightingale family group chat. We have endured far too much waxing poet about your posterior over the past months.”
“Why do they all have variations of the same name? Who gives all their children the same name?”
“He likes my ass?”
“Oh my god, bigger picture Dick, focus.”
“Seriously, do they all have the same name outside of the older sister? I feel like we need to acknowledge they all have the same name.”
“Can we go back to the fact that Damian got married? To Elle? Yesterday? How did you even do that without anyone knowing?
“Dr. Nightingale is a notary.”
“…Dr. Nightingale as in the woman Bruce is investigating Dr. Nightingale?”
“Okay but the name thing? Please tell me you’re not naming the baby some variation of the name Daniel.”
“If the gremlins get their way it will be. Do you know how many lists we’ve made that they keep sabotaging?”
“So you have Dan’s number? Could you give it to me?”
“Jesus Christ, Dick I’m begging you.”
“Why did you guys even get married?”
“For the diplomatic immunity.”
“You don’t have diplomatic immunity.”
“I do now.”
“What does that mean?”
Reblogged to save haha beautiful
Phantom accidentally turned Darkseid into a 4 inch long gecko and-not realizing this is an evil god- kidnapped him and is keeping him in an enclosure in his bedroom.
It gives Jazz the creeps but she just chalked it up to the angry scowl the thing always had.
Everyone is looking for Phantom for different reasons but no one knows who he is or where to find him. Darkseid is stuck as a lizard and is trying really hard not to bond with this scrawny 14 year old-and failing.
Aka lizard Darkseid being defeated "power of love and friendship" style. Thats it. Thats the post.
Aaaaaaaaaaaah I’m dying I will cherish this to my last day thank you very much. If you continue it (maybe on ao3??) I will be eternally grateful. If you don’t I will also be eternally grateful for the story it’s so gooood.
I love seeing Danny Phantom showing up and being like ‘don’t ask too many questions but John Constantine I own your soul. All of it. Lmao sucks to suck bitch’, and he’s usually all Ghost King Full Regalia as he does it, at least in front of the Justice League, but consider—
He just shows up as Danny Fenton.
“yeah I got bored and collected the pieces like Pokémon. Gotta catch ‘em all” says the 5’2 teen who looks like a stiff breeze could trip him. He denies being a sorcerer, or a magician, concedes he’s maybe psychic but mostly he’s just…. The kid of two mad scientists—who have a basement lab where they opened a portal to what he SAYS is not hell but no one is frankly CONVINCED, by the way—and he hasn’t decided what to do with Constantine yet besides getting Danny into some r rated horror movies, but figures he should tell the dude probably.
“What’d you even trade for some of his soul contracts?”
“Don’t worry about it”
They worry about it
John Constantine: *whimpers*
The Batfam: Uh, should we… do something about this??
Constantine: *casts a spell. Ineffectively. Whimpers again.*
Damian: Tt. I have already contacted Alfred to prepare an enclosure.
Constantine, literally throwing the book at Little Baby Man, nothing sticking: *visible crisis* This isn’t a great sign.
The Batfam, watching this foot long creature cause mass property damage, cultists screaming and bleeding: Can we do something else?
Constantine: Alright I’m out. Call me if you make it mad and I might be able to divert it from destroying the universe. Might.
The Batfam: *panic and concern*
A group of cultists have procured all that is neccessary to bring forth their lord, the real lord, the Undying Ruler of All Things Dead, King of The Infinite Realms, so he shall bring forth a new future of fear and destruction. They will have a world anew, remade in their deity's image.
"Rise!" screams their illustrious leader. "Rise, oh Great One!"
The summoning circle glows an unearthly green, to the point it becomes blinding. Black smoke rises behind the light, then a figure starts to be seen through the fog. He has arrived.
The smoke clears, and the Cult of Pariah the Dark get a full view of the being they have summoned.
They see a... small... worm creature...?
Oh those poor, poor fools. They know not of the dangers they have unleashed. They stand, unwittingly staring at the harbringer of their demise, for they have not summoned Pariah Dark, oh no, no, no, no, no, no. That entity, despite his destructive nature, can be reasoned with. The being they summoned cannot.
The Little Baby Man stares back, a smirk from ear to ear and eyes wide. He lounges at them.
They never stood a chance.
Ok ok but. This person *cough Ra’s cough* is not an idiot. They decide to test this so-called “immortality” by crushing the snail.
Well, it.. doesn’t perish… but it certainly dies, and now there’s a ghost snail inching through the air towards him and nothing will stop it.
And so Danny gets kidnapped by this frootloop another time, except now it’s as Fenton, and this guy wants him to contain the snail.
…UNFORTUNATE
Danny gets summoned by [Insert DC character here] and they ask for immortality. And while Danny might look like a giant regal ancient-looking king with a cape made of the fabric of reality and a body made of space, he is still a teenager, so he accepts.
[Insert DC character here] is about to offer there soul or firstborn child, but Danny stops them and instead picks up a random snail, whispers some ancient, unbreakable magic on the snail, and tells [Insert DC character here] that the snail is immortal, always knows where they are, will always follow the quickest past to you, and if it touches them, they will instantly die. Danny puts the snail on the ground and vanishes, leaving them to there fate.
this is a glorious crack fic idea. I. I am in awe
Danny, causally being Peak Mad Scientist, would absolutely be Bat adoption (or Batkid romance?) bait. But. But. The Sirens would be all over this. Maybe the Rogues (some of them) too, depending on their moral orientation.
So; custody battle! The Bats (and other heroes) are trying to adopt him, Lex Luthor wants him either dead or working for Lexcorp, the Rogues want an alliance with him, Ra’s has some pointed questions for him, and the Sirens think he’s the cutest wittle scientist ever—look at his schemes, Ives! Look at his style!
Danny isn’t entirely sure having an entire dimension trying to recruit him is that much better than his own trying to dissect him, but he’ll take it.
Inspired by this post. & design from @little-pondhead
I'd probably try to draw more later but for now, my brain is mush
This 'mad scientist' au has me in a chokehold. I wish nothing more than to run away with it and make a comic out of it. Danny deserves to be a gremlin in another universe and make it everyones problem.
I'd like to think that there's a day he just takes blueprints from Vlad and makes his own hoverboard and chills on it.
Imagine: Danny sitting on it with a bucket of popcorn as he watches the corrupt companies screech to high heaven to stop the program he installed and "WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE CANT STOP IT- NO I DON'T NEED THAT FILE GET RID OF- ITS UPLOADED ON THE INTERNET?!"
I see no way for this to go wrong
Sacrifice Danny to the goose
THE SACRIFICE MUST BE MADE ( @tourettesdog ‘s little baby man makes an appearance :) )
So cute and so smol
I don’t know why we’re drawing Danny as a little baby man but I’m down
Description under cut
Keep reading
Oooooooooooooooh yay
A DP x DC Crossover
Danny Fenton and Damian Wayne sibling AU
A ten year old leads a six year old through dark and ancient tunnels. *A secret,* the elder boy had called it, *a game*, the younger had understood. All games were secret, because if the purpose was less important than Mother considered the time to be they would get in trouble. Still, he memorized the paths they took. If they were caught, he could show that he could find the way back. That was a good skill.
"This way, Dami," his brother said, his voice soft, but far to loud in the silent tunnels. "We're almost free,"
"Free from what?"
"All of this." Danyal said with conviction, "I have a plan, we can be *normal."*
"W-what do you mean?" Stories of traitors and what happens so them stopped Damian in his tracks.
"Normal kids don't get in trouble for harmless games, Dami. It's not right. But I found a way, and we won't ever have to deal with it again."
A choice solidified. This was not a game. One did not need to be as skilled as their opponent when they had the element of suprise.
Damian was not a traitor.
He left Danyal in a growing pool of blood.
He found his way back to his mother, and he was never told that his brother's body was never found.
---
An exasperated barista called for the order with the legal maximum amount of caffeine.
Two people walked up to collect it.
The barista's eye twitched at the realization she had to make a second one of these, but read the name off the order and gave it to the boy who was not the regular.
The one with the drink gave a nod of solidarity to the one still waiting, and returned to his group.
The one without the drink did the same.
"Wow, can you believe someone else order's like Tim?" One of his brothers mused.
Damian looked over, and locked eyes with a ghost (Both literal and metaphorical). The coffee holder froze like prey uncertain if it had been noticed.
"Danyal?" Damian whispered and the rabbit had his permission to bolt.
"Wait!" But the other was already out the door, making his way into the crowd.
Damian vaulted over the table and gave chase.
His brothers sat stunned for a full two seconds before scrambling after him.
___
Idk if I plan on continuing, feel free to continue it yourself or use it as a prompt.
💕
Danny had plans okay? He had plans!?
He was going to meet with Lady Gotham and ask her permission for him to stay in Gotham before he excepted the acceptance letter to Gotham University. She couldn’t exactly say no due to him being of higher power in the Ghost Court but it would be rude of him to not ask. So that was the plan and it was a simple one that shouldn’t have gotten this screwed up.
Lady Gotham seemed to have a preference for rooftops and Danny wasn’t about to object to meeting her on one, him being in her domain and all. After she tells him it’s okay for him to chill in her city she disappeared quickly. When meeting with a domain or lair owner you get tunnel vision so you can only focus on the owner. Apparently it was a type of defense mechanism. Having home field advantage and all that jazz.
That being said Danny forgot he was on the edge of the roof facing the drop. He was already startled by coming back to himself when he heard someone softly land a few feet behind him. Turning around quickly he lost his footing on the slippery edge and decided this was embarrassing enough so he let gravity take hold and he fell.
He’s been thrown into enough building and has broken enough concrete with his back to know this fall won’t hurt him. When he hit the ground it felt more like he jumped on a hard bed. Not a pleasant feeling but it also doesn’t hurt. Danny just wasn’t expecting the person, who he now sees is Red Robin, who startled him to jump after him.
Laying there in a dirty alleyway after falling from a five story building isn’t his best move but it’s too late now. He laid still hopping Red Robin won’t fully notice him but of course he can never get what he wants.
Red Robin kneels down next to him and feels for a pulse Danny knows won’t be there. Red Robin says something he can’t quite catch into what he assumes is a com and then let’s out a quiet “shit” shaking his head. Danny opens his eyes and looks at him saying, “watch your language.”
He got a terrified screech in response.