Eve!Alastor AU With Fallen!Adam AU

the thing is that childhood doesn't just end when you turn 18 or when you turn 21. it's going to end dozens of times over. your childhood pet will die. actors you loved in movies you watched as a kid will die. your grandparents will die, and then your parents will die. it's going to end dozens and dozens of times and all you can do is let it. all you can do is stand in the middle of the grocery store and stare at freezers full of microwave pizza because you've suddenly been seized by the memory of what it felt like to have a pizza party on the last day of school before summer break. which is another ending in and of itself

Whoever is threatening Harry is about to learn ‘an object in motion, stays in motion unless acted upon by another force’ via a sleep deprived, nicotine addicted professor, with homicidal tendencies.

danny's the most 'guy who can't leave well enough alone' ever

On a less serious note, Vox is an unrepentant simp and when all of Hell finds out Alastor was Eve, he is practically foaming at the mouth.

Vox, ecstatic: To think Alastor was the first woman! The mother of all humanity!

Valentino, teasing: To think Vox has a mommy kink.

Velvette, done with both of them: Says the man writing a B-movie script about Eve right now.

Eve Reincarnation!AU

*He/she/they pronouns for Eve

Eve was bored. Heaven's wonders could only entertain her for so long. And she was sick of the pity and condescension.

For all that Lucifer was damned to the hell he created for his actions, he at least had Lilith with him to bare the burden.

She was not so lucky. Adam would sooner die a second death than take accountability. And the angels regarded her alone with mixed pity and suspicion.

Adam thrived in heaven, but it stifled her like nothing else. Eternal peace was stagnant; she missed Earth and eagerly watched the planet and her descendents antics with curiosity.

It was her who first put forth the idea of reincarnation. But Sera, bewildered by her desire to leave heaven and wary of having her alive after her first fuckup (honestly, eat one fruit and they never let you forget it!), dismissed her.

It was just her luck that Adam, who ran his mouth faster than his brain could keep up, bragged about getting the Seraphim to agree to his yearly hell extermination where her request had been rejected.

And wasn't it just grand that it was supposed to be a secret? Wouldn't it be a shame for that to get out, right, Sera?

Her reincarnation request was approved. She was the first and only soul to be granted this. Per her request, heaven would be barred from viewing or interfering with her new life.

And it was wonderful! They had a new life, a new name, a new gender! And no one to hold them back and say 'remember the apple, Eve?'

Then they died. And back to heaven they went, unknowing of their past life as Eve. Until Sera accousted them before they'd even made it through the gate.

Sera conjured a glowing white apple and offered it to them. Their curiosity had followed them to this next life so they accepted and the Seraphim smiled sardonically and said, 'Welcome back Eve.'

But they. weren't. EVE! Not anymore. Or at least they were not JUST eve.

But being the only soul to reincarnate, the angels just didn't understand that. Nor would Sera care to, she allowed Adam and Eve's requests only if she could ignore the consequences.

The human who once was Eve, decided to reincarnate again. Anything to escape their dreary eternity in heaven.

And then he died. And Sera offered him the apple, said, 'Welcome back Eve' and on and on the cycle continued.

He tried to lead his next few lifetimes into sin, maybe in hell they'd get at least some of the excitement she'd loved from Earth.

She had no clue how she kept getting into heaven. Over the course of several different lives, they'd committed all sorts of sins. And yet it never stuck.

So they struck a deal, and in his next life, she finally got what she'd been craving.

Eternal Entertainment.

Welcome to hell, Alastor.

i personally need 'em to team up real bad

I will read a thousand fics with this trope. It’s hilarious every single time. My favorite has to be Dermabrasion by pennydaniels

have a silly drabble since I’m still unsure if the tags work properly yet ~

The idea of adult Dabi actually meeting Shoto is so insanly funny to me, like;

Dabi’s had Shoto built up as this perfect Enji 2.0 in his head his whole life, a cocky little shit who’s insanly powerful and pretty and popular and better than him in any way, and god he hates him for it!

But, they somehow meet, and somehow they have to work together for something, (let’s say it’s a league as vigilantes au or smt), and Dabi is like, side-eyeing him super hard, being short and harsh towards him, expecting Shoto to do the same, but no

Sweet, dense Shoto doesn’t even pick up on it, he’s just like

«yes, yes, I heard you are my brother and I must say it is nice you are not dead after all, now, shall we do what we need to do?»

and Dabi is just like…

«is this motherfucker being funny? is he trying me???»

Shoto is, of course, just doing his thing, and Dabi slowly realizes as they go, and while they do the mission they’re supposed to, Dabi is slowly coming to terms with the fact that he’s spent the last 16-17 years feeling threatened by this unaware little bean of a boy, and it is leading him to a full blown existentional crisis.

Shoto, however. just thinks they had a nice time together ☺️🥰

But I’ve heard people questioning if Snape was really traumatized by SWM. At first I had no idea what they were on about. How could Snape not be traumatized? Why are you even questioning this? But I figured what they meant was: why doesn’t Snape act the way I know traumatized characters to act? Why isn’t he having flashbacks or breaking down when being exposed to his triggers? 

Snape’s trauma is the angry aggressive kind. Snape’s trauma can be mistaken for a “grudge”. Because it’s not what people understand trauma to be.

In HBP, Harry was trying to crucio Snape and do all this other stuff, and Snape was so unbothered by it. But the moment Snape noticed Harry was about to cast levicorpus on him, Snape completely lost his shit. Below was Snape’s response to Harry trying to cast levicorpus on him.

“No, Potter!” screamed Snape. There was a loud BANG and Harry was soaring backward, hitting the ground hard again, and this time his wand flew out of his hand.

This is Snape’s response to Harry trying to crucio him. Literally torture him.

But Snape parried the curse,

Like a casual “whatever”. Yeah Harry got knocked off his feet, but he didn’t go soaring backwards like he did when Snape responded to Harry’s levicorpus.

During occlumency lessons Snape manhandled Harry and threw him out of the room, after seeing Harry watching James Potter humiliate him.

I shouldn’t have to add disclaimers to my post, disclaimers should be givens. But unfortunately we haven’t reached that point yet.

Disclaimer: I don’t approve of Snape hurting Harry more than what he had to (Snape still had to defend himself in HBP) and I don’t approve of Snape physically hurting Harry in Snape’s Worst Memory chapter. 

I’m not saying that Snape’s way of expressing his trauma is okay. He needed therapy to help him learn to deal with and express his trauma in a less problematic way. The point is that Snape’s trauma is overlooked and lessened. Snape’s PTSD is called a “grudge.” 

Snape had a grudge against James Potter vs Snape was still traumatized by James Potter.

James’ change.

I will always maintain that James changed for the better. I won’t argue my point, because I’m not here to convince you that James changed.

There seems to be this “unspoken” “implied” message that because James changed, the damage he did to Snape doesn’t count anymore. Okay yeah James hurt Snape, but James changed, why can’t Snape just get over it?

I have zero problem with the idea of James changing. He grew as a character, happens to be morally grey, and actually has the capacity for good? Not a problem with me. He changed? Great.

If people spoke about James’ change like he fits in with one of the themes in HP, that people can change for the better.

But unfortunately James’ change isn’t spoken about like that. James’ change is treated like some sort of band aid to slap on Snape’s trauma. 

I am okay with James changing if we’re speaking about James’ overall character, as well as his character development. But, if a post is specifically about Snape’s trauma, then I don’t care how much James changed, and I don’t think “but James changed” should be slapped on any original post talking about the very real post traumatic stress disorder that Snape has because of James and Sirius’ bullying him for years. 

I was wondering for the longest time why some Snape fans were so salty over the idea of James changing. So the fuck what if he did change? Why is the very idea of James changing a bad thing? Why is it so hurtful? My response to James’ changing was “meh cool.” Like I’m not jumping up and down in joy over it, but I don’t find the idea of James changing personally offensive. 

But now I get why even the POSSIBILITY of James having changed is personally offensive for people. When we hear the statement James changed, it’s hardly ever on an original post. It’s nearly always some Snape anti James stan coming onto a post (that is appropriately tagged) talking about Snape’s PTSD and they come onto that post and say “but James changed.” As in yeah but whatever about the emotional pain Snape had to suffer from years later, yeah but whatever about his triggers because James changed.

“James changed” has become a symbol for dismissing Snape’s PTSD.

I now understand why people take “James changed” so personally, as if someone went up to them and slapped them across the face. 

Very much inspired by that Valentine Pin-Up Alastor merch where the only significant change is him having his bow-tie unclipped.

Anyway, happy valentine day sike, it's Aro week and we are begrudgingly going on dates to help our friends with their heist.

Why not both? Rumple's already The Beast and The Crocodile, whats an anthropomorphic duck on top of all that?

Bonus points if all the kids he makes deals for become part of his family, I mean the McDuck clan family tree is already complicated it'd fit right in with OUAT.

once upon a time au where everything is the same except instead of rumpelstiltskin, mr gold is actually revealed to be scrooge mcduck.

DP x DC prompt #189

You know those prompts where Danny refuses to enter Red Hood's territory because he knows not to enter a ghosts territory? Yeah, this is the opposite.

Batman sends a few of the Batfam to Amity Park to investigate the ghost sightings. When they get there, however, Jason refuses to step into the town due to some instinctual feeling he has.