We Did It You Guys!

i'm so confused rn, can you explain the goncharov thing?? i get off tumblr for five minutes

(This post will be kept pinned & periodically updated until 28 Nov)

Lmaoooo

Nah I getchu. So this post has been circulating for like a year:

[Image ID:
A screenshot of a Tumblr post. The OP is by @zootycoon with a cat-eared computer icon. At the top is a close-up of a white person holding up a black hightop sneaker tongue to display the label. In an all-caps font like a movie poster, the sewn on label reads:
“<in black>THE GREATEST MAFIAMOVIE EVER MADE
<in red> MARTIN SCORSESE PRESENTS
<in black, bold> GONCHATOV
<black subtext> DOMENICO PROCACCI PRODUCTION
A FILM BY NATTED JWHJ0715 ABOUT THE NAPLES MAFIA”
The body of the text reads:
“i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck”
The reblog below it is from @loseremo with a green fruit icon. The addition is simply a screenshot of a comment from dark mode from @abandonedambition with a trans flag Azrael head icon. It reads:
“this idiot hasn’t seen goncharov” /End ID]

Link to post.

But yesterday, it had inspired someone to do this:

[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post by @beelzeebub with a white, brown-haired person wearing round shades as their icon. The post is a very convincing mock-up of a 1970’s mafioso film, with most of the details taken from the original shoe. The featured actors listed at the top are Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Gene Hackman, and Harvey Keitel.
The title is riddled with bullet holes and reads in all caps:
[in black] MARTIN SCORSESE PRESENTS
[in red] GONCHAROV
[subtext, black] A FILM BY MAYYEO JWHJ O715
The quote off to the side is in red, and reads in all caps: WINTER COMES TO NAPLES.
The body of the poster features a pink gradient sky. On the right is a landscape of block apartments; to left is a far off shot of whar looks like Saint Basil’s Cathedral.
The main figure is a white man with slicked back brown hair and a trimmed mustache in an overcoat, holding a submachine gun (Robert De Niro). Around him, going clockwise, is a white man with short, unstyled hair and an eyepatch over his left eye (Harvey Keitel); a man with black hair and a black tuxedo holding an unidentified object (John Cazale); a white man with dark brown hair in a grey suit with red vest and tie, smoking (Al Pacino); a white man with a full brown mustache wearing a Soviet ushanka and a heavy grey coat, holding a handgun (Gene Hackman); and a blonde white woman (Cybil Shepherd) wearing a light grey fur coat and red lipstick. In front of the characters and bordering the bottom of the poster is a black line partially on fire, with an unidentifiable civilian car up in flames.
Below this is a quote reading, in all caps:
[In black]“THE GREATEST MAFIA MOVIE EVER MADE.”
[In red]A DOMENICO PROCACCI PRODUCTION
The film credits read as follows:
Robert De Niro as “Lo Straniero/Goncharov” Al Pacino as “Mario Ambrosini” Harvey Keitel as “Andrey ‘The Banker’ Daddano” Gene Hackman as “Valery Michailov” John Cazale as “Joseph 'Ice Pick Joe’ Morelli” and Cybil Shepherd as “Katya”
Written by MATTEO JWHJ0715 Produced by DOMENICO PROCACCI Directed by MARTIN SCORSESE Production Services by BEELZ
Below this fabricated and convincingly aged movie poster, the post reads:
Goncharov (1973) dir. Martin Scorsese
[In italics] “The greatsst mafia movie (n)ever made.” /End ID]

Link to post.

Next thing I knew there were fake Letterboxed reviews.

Goncharov moodboards. Really good ones.

[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post by user @fircyk with a statue head as their icon. The post reads:
“goncharov (1973) was just. ok let’s put robert de niro, cybill shepherd and al pacino in a fucked up murderous love triangle in italy. /End ID]

Link to post.

Meta analysis. So many fake meta essays. Disturbingly good ones. And of course the memes. (Edit: HAVE I SAID THIS SHIT IS DISTURBING)

As you can see, the myth just started to grow, characters and ships and tropes being added one after the other, almost bizzarely without contradiction, until there was enough of shape to the whole thing for people to start posting fanfic about it on AO3. "No beta we die like ice-pick Joe" is already a tag.

[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post by user @hanniecat922, featuring a white person with fluffy hair steepling their fingers. The post reads:
"Say what you want about Ice Pick Joe, but we stan a guy who:
1. Knows what he wants to do (stab ppl)
2. Knows how he wants to do it (with an ice pick).
Best character in Goncharov (1973) by far. Y'all can fight me about it.
The tags at the bottom read:
#goncharov1973 #goncharov (1973) #goncharov #john cazale /End ID]

Link to post.

It was hilarious in the beginning, but the way it's developed within less than a day, kind of like it's being willed into existence, is freaking me out a bit. We're toying with powers beyond our comprehension. 😂😂😂

[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post by user @grazdan with a swirling galaxy as their icon. The post starts with a faked news screenshot, supposedly panning down the (still very false) Goncharov (1973) movie poster. It is supposedly being broadcast live, with a breaking news title is cut off, partially reading:
"GONCHAROV II: KATYA’S REVENGE” IN …“
The time is 16:06. The scrolling news bar at the bottom reads:
"ELON MUSK FOUND DEAD IN A DUMPSTER AFTER PROCLAIMING HE WILL BUY TUMBLR.C …”
Below this fake “screenshot”, the post reads in all caps:
“OH MY GOD YOU GUYS SCORCESE IS FINALLY DOING IT AFTER 49 years!!!!!!” /End ID]

Link to post.

Of course, there could be an ulterior motive as well.

IMAGE 6
[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post by @notsolstice with a wailing ghost gremlin as their icon. The post reads:
“are we welcoming new users to this website by posting abput the 1973 hit martin scorsese presents goncharov the greatest mafia movie ever made or is that just a coincidence.”
The tags below read:
#gunshots are all fine and well but sometimes a bagpipe rehearsal works even better #that bagpipe’s name? goncharov (1973) #unreality
/End ID]

Link to post (tags mine).

Edit: guys, please tag these posts "unreality" so people with disassociation issues can filter them out (not this one, this is an explainer). <3

----------------------------------------------

Edit 2: Aparently the boots in the original post are actually referring to a movie called Gomorrah that came out in 2008, directed by Mateo Garrone, based on the Scampia Feud. And other people had also been making posts about the fake movie for a while before the poster took off.

found by @thepotch

[Image description: a sepia-toned, vintage looking movie poster.
<headline in bold black letters> "THE GREATEST MAFIA MOVIE EVER MADE."
<small font> – Stephen Schaefer, Boston Herald.
MARTIN SCORSESE PRESENTS
<huge font>GOMORRAH
<smaller impact font, names in red> A DOMENICO PROCACCI PRODUCTION + A FILM BY MATTEO GARRONE BASED ON THE BEST SELLING EXPOSÉ BY ROBERTO SAVIANO ABOUT THE NAPLES MAFIA
The poster is dominated by a man wearing only speedo and sneakers, carrying a large handgun, facing away from the viewer, walking into what seems like a stark, desert landscape, head bowed. 
<In smaller text below, to the right side of the poster> OFFICIAL ENTRY
ITALY BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM ACADEMY AWARDS 2008
<beside that, encircled in a laurel wreath> WINNER GRAND PRIX CANNES FILM FESTIVAL 2008
<names in capitals in print worn almost too light to see>TONI SERVILLO, GIANFELICE IMPARATO, MARIA NAZIONALE, SALVATORE CATANTALUPO,  GIGIO MORRA, SALVATORE ABRUZZESE, MARCO MACOR, CIRO PETRONE, CARMINE PATERNOSTER
IFC FILMS presents a FANDANGO production in collaboration with RAI CINEMA
<Smaller almost incipherable text lists credits for story, screenplay, director>
<bottom text>Produced with the support of Ministero per i beni culturali e ambientali – Departmente dello Specttacolo
Developed with the support of the Media Programme of the European Community 
Based on the novel GOMORRAH by ROBERTO SAVIANO
Poblished in US by Farrar Straus & [unclear]
[tiny logos of the various studios involved]/End ID]

Edit 3: Explainer: why did those boots have this movie on them anyway?

Edit 4: Alt text added to all images courtesy of @valentineish ❤️

Edit 5: Turns out tumblr has done this kind of thing before. Nine years in this hell place and I had to have "Squiddles" and penis smp explained in the replies.

Edit 6: This post collects the Lore so far.

Edit 7: Lynda Carter (real one)/ earns more/ Tumblr cred.

Edit 8: Holy shit y'all we have the theme music. With sheet music. And it's on Spotify!

Edit 9: THERE IS A TRAILER WITH THE THEME MUSIC

----------------------------------------------

I made this post 18 hours after the movie poster went up. Closed edits 27 hours after first posting. So all of the above happened within 45 hours of the movie poster going up.

Edit 10: Google document live-compiling all the lore so far (Day 3)

Edit 11: Masterpost of Goncharov soundtracks (Day 3)

Edit 12: Entertainment news articles covering the Gonch-posting (real) (Contd from yday)

Edit 13: The music from the masterpost all compiled into a 31-minute original score with video edits on YouTube (edit: unfortunately taken down)

Edit 14: Staff's Goncharov art showcase for Tumblr Tuesday

As of closing on Day 3 there are 371 works in the AO3 tag.

-----

Updating with Day 3 shenanigans I missed yesterday:

Edit 15: Goncharov TV Tropes page

Edit 16: Ethics of Gonchposting

Important PSA 1 (how to reduce harm to Tumblr's neurodivergents)

Important PSA 2 (reality affirmation, anti-bullying)

Important PSA 3 (why you should stop trying to vandalise legit information sites)

Edit 17: Character lore from beezlebub whose poster they originated from

Edit 18: What we know about/ Director Matteo JWHJ0715 (#unreality)

Edit 19: Link to post with screenshotted and described NYT article (scroll down) and this golden exerpt from BuzzFeed: 💀

Screenshot of article reading: Tumblr user tsscat compiled a “Goncharov Lore Masterpost,” listing all the known theories and plot lines, which was edited to say “BUZZFEED DO NOT MINE THIS POST FOR CONTENT” at the top after BuzzFeed News requested to chat with them about it. So we’ll just link that here.

(alt text included)

End of Day 4 there are now 485 works in the Goncharov tag on AO3

----

Didn't get to update this on Day 5, so these are the Day 5 doings:

More trailers!

Trailer 1 (My favourite)

Trailer 2

Trailer 3

Trailer 4

I also just found out about the Goncharov Game Jam.

Website Logo: an icon of a basket with a video game controller inside it, beside which is written "itch.io"
Header:Goncharov Game Jam
Hosted by Autumn Chen
Center text: Submissions open from November 21st 2022 at 1:30 AM to December 5th 2022 at 1:30 PM
Submissions due in
<in separate counters>
9 days
11 hours
30 minutes
20 seconds
Big red button in the middle says "join jam"
/ID]

It appears this opened a day after after the meme took off.

Goncharov was first entered into Wikipedia between Day 4 and 5 (attempts to vandalise it with fake info don't count, incidentally – please knock that shit off) under List of Internet Phenomena. This was then expanded into its own Wikipedia page at the end of Day 5 because, according to the talk history: "the topic now meets the notability threshold for its own artice due to significant coverage in The New York Times and other sources cited." We're on Wikipedia, people!

And then we made The Guardian half a day later. So while the meme is definitely dying down to embers by now, it still stays winning.

YouTube channels with episodes on the meme:

InformOverlord (4:30)

Lessons in Meme Culture (2:43)

End of Day of 5 there were 511 works on AO3, and End of Day 6 (today) there are 556.

--

🚨BREAKING 🚨 from Martin Scorsese's daughter's TikTok (real actual)

tw: unreality:

We did it you guys!

Clarification: Francesca Scorcese asked her Dad about the meme and Martin played along. Please reblog this PSA to help Tumblr people with psychosis. Thanks.

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So during the Shibuya arc, where we get the official Pseudo-Geto reveal, we are treated to this scene.

SPOILERS For Jujutsu Kaisen, Chapter 91 And Jujutsu Kaisen 0, Chapter 4

This scene, which very clearly demonstrates that Geto can still control his own body - albeit very briefly, and to a very small extent. Something that seems to be influenced by Gojo, and also something that seems to take Pseudo-Geto by surprise.

And - it should. Geto is dead. He isn't possessed, his soul isn't tainted - he is dead. He was killed by Gojo himself, far before Pseudo-Geto got his hands on the body. It makes absolutely no sense for Geto to resonate with Gojo's words because Geto is a person who isn't alive anymore.

And then, in JJK 0, we get the interesting case of Rika and Yuta.

It's assumed, at first, that Rika cursed Yuta, manifesting as a spirit after her death. In reality, it was Yuta who cursed Rika by refusing to let go of her. His overwhelming power didn't let her die properly, resulting in her transforming into a cursed spirit, all because he was unwilling to accept that she had died.

So... We know that those that die can be kept alive by powerful sorcerers. If a powerful sorcerer isn't willing to accept someone's death, their power may manifest them into a cursed spirit and keep them around.

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Social Issues that Help with Understanding Buddy Daddies

Here are some political, social, and cultural aspects of Japanese culture that I think is important to keep in mind when watching Buddy Daddies. Please note: this is a super long post, with lots of pictures. 

image
image

1. Human Trafficking - Slave Labor

In Episode One, we learn that Miri’s birth father was involved in labor based human trafficking involving Southeast Asian individuals. This is currently a very big issue in Japan, since Southeast Asian immigrants (among others) are viewed as a cheap labor option and usually experience slave labor like conditions.

From The United States Department of State website:

Men, women, and children from Northeast Asia, Southeast Asia, South Asia, Latin America, and Africa travel to Japan for employment or fraudulent marriage and are subjected to sex trafficking. Traffickers use fraudulent marriages between foreign women and Japanese men to facilitate the entry of women into Japan for sex trafficking in bars, clubs, brothels, and massage parlors. Traffickers keep victims in forced labor or commercial sex using debt-based coercion, threats of violence or deportation, blackmail, confiscation of passports and other documents, and other psychologically coercive methods.

image

2. Drugs in Japan

When I was living and working as an ALT in Japan, two ALTs (in a different district, but within the same company of my own), got caught with drugs. It was a big deal and ended up in the newspapers. The company I worked for had to do a lot of PR work with the elementary and junior high schools that they had contracts with, to ensure that the contracts would remain. As for me and the other ALTs? We had to sit through like five separate meetings within like two months about drugs and drug laws in Japan. 

The barebones takeaway is that, in Japan, weed is viewed as being on the same level as hardcore drugs. Charges can be steep and strict. Even just knowing that someone has drugs, and you don’t say anything to law enforcement about it, can get you in trouble. There is a grey area with drugs, which is stuff like bath salts and the like. Since the selling of things like that cannot be prohibited, so they are easily accessible to the public. 

Japan still has a very “90′s D.A.R.E.” approach to drugs. It’s catchphrase is 「ダメ。ゼッタイ。」or “No! Never.”

image

(Image from a Web Magazine called Nagasaki Press.)

When celebrities are caught with (what’s usually) weed, it can basically be the end of their careers, since recreational drug use of any kind (excluding alcohol, of course), is still negatively looked down upon in Japanese society. This is why it is still heavily left in the hands of the yakuza and drug kingpins, etc. Though there has been a recent increase in protests and ideology surrounding the idea of legalizing weed. Still, not much acceptance for recreational use is likely to come yet. However…

There may soon be some revision to the laws, which will allow for medical use:

Legislation changes scheduled for 2023

In 2021, the MHLW established an expert committee to review the Cannabis Control Act, and it is expected revisions will be proposed in a bill to be submitted in 2023. This will most likely allow for the use of medical cannabis. 2022/12/02

From: Euromonitor

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image

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image

(Image from the Japanese website: Nice Senior).

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And that’s talking about elementary school aged kids. For ones that are around Miri’s age, usually the parents (mostly mothers) will bring them by bike:

image

Or they will get picked up by a bus:

image

This one looks pretty boring in comparison to some others you might see though, like these:

image

(Image from the Hiyoshidai School Website)

Sometimes the daycare workers will also take them on little excursions outside using big strollers for the kids to travel around in:

image

(The image is obviously from a stock photo site called fotostock, but yeah, I’ve seen these before when I lived in Japan).

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Fics:

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artsyxabbyx - The Official Simp Blog
The Official Simp Blog

✨I’m 23✨ she/theyCosplayer, author, streamer/gamer, musician, horror junkie, anime enthusiast.

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