Natalia Dyer
Why do I find it so hard to break away from IR porn? I have a beautiful Asian girlfriend who I love. I have no intentions of being cucked and I don't want her to know about my habits, but no other porn besides porn with Black men fucking other women or hlwoneb Humiliating white men like me and comparing me to BBC gets me off. Why is that? Is there a way to break off from this sort of mentality? I went an entire week without porn but then saw a gorgeous white girl walking down the street with a black guy (average height probably even shorter than me) and it set me off and I went back binging porn again. The cycle feels so defeating every time I relapse.
It's a bit like asking how you can stop yourself from liking chocolate (the real chocolate, not the metaphorical one). It just so happens that eating chocolate makes you feel good, so now that you've gotten a taste for it at some point long ago, the idea of eating chocolate will always appeal to you. You can distract and restrain yourself and not eat chocolate all day, but you'll never not like thinking about chocolate.
The interracial aesthetic is quite like that. For various cultural, historical and just purely aesthetic reasons which I've touched on here previously, Black-white sexual pairings and Black man / white woman pairings in particular are irresistible to watch. Thinking about them releases just the right pleasure chemicals in your brain, as does chocolate. And now that you've gotten a taste for it, you'll never not like thinking about it.
As you already discovered though, this isn't just a porn phenomenon, you increasingly see it IRL as well and you will inevitably encounter these thoughts again, even if you try to abstain from porn completely.
So I would suggest, instead of being a masochist about it and going through binge-relapse cycles, why not accept that this is something you like thinking about, have your private fun with it if you don't want to involve your gf, and don't be neurotic about it anymore? I imagine you can keep yourself from eating chocolate all day, so I trust that you will also be able to stop obsessive porn consumption once you're more comfortable with yourself.
And why shouldn't you be comfortable? Imagining Black men having sex with the women you find attractive might be a little unusual (though increasingly less so) and scratch your masculine pride, but once you're over that minor hangup, it's just hot and a source of reliable pleasure for you. So make use of this year's pride month, come out to yourself as an afrosexual and stop feeling bad about it.
Would you let the girl who friend zoned you fuck on your bed?
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