★ Hey Francois ★

TOH except the characters are replaced by my failed Google searches

mythologizing abuse as this horrible thing that only evil, malicious Abusers do to Innocent Victims is a really, really dangerous way of thinking. You have to recognize that anyone is capable of causing harm, and that it is possible to address it and improve as a person after hurting someone.

This idea that harm is an Evil Act that comes from Bad People, or makes someone a Bad Person is a black and white framing that makes it incredibly difficult to actually address harm, and actually winds up protecting abusers.

Because that's just not how it works. It's not an accurate model of reality. So subscribing to it gives you some dangerous blind spots; you won't be looking for signs of abuse or harm from someone you believe to be a Good Person, and the people around you are very likely to be afraid to actually communicate with you when a line is crossed for fear of being made out to be a Bad Person.

Abuse is something you do, not something you are. It has nothing to do with who the individuals are, it's a description of the impact certain kinds of actions have on someone else. The idea that believing something bad or doing something hurtful defines something intrinsic to the person in question creates an environment where it is impossible to grow or change into someone who no longer does those things or believes those ideas; you've condemned that person as someone Inherently Bad, what's the point of trying to improve if nobody will give them the benefit of the doubt?

And, more to the point of what I want to get across here, thinking like this is unbelievably stressful. It puts you on constant eggshells forever - cross the wrong line, and you mark yourself as A Bad Person, someone deserving of punishment, vitriol, rejection, every and any hostility one might see fit to throw at you. It's fucking terrifying, you wind up believing that any mistake could be your undoing, that you have to do no wrong, have to convince others that you've done no wrong, that you're a Good Person, not someone who hurts others.

But that's the thing. Nobody's perfect, it's impossible to be. You can't know everything before it happens, you'll never have all the context for something before having to make a decision. Inevitably, you will cross a line, violate a boundary, realize something you were taught about the world is actually bigotry, and that you never questioned it until now. And you will have to reconcile with that. You need to be prepared to face that reality, again and again, at any moment, for the rest of your life.

Far more often than anyone wants to admit, abuse isn't a product of malice or hatred, it's a byproduct of someone well-intentioned who for one reason or another has a mental block keeping them from prioritizing someone else's needs and wellbeing as necessary. They behave in ways that hurt and shut down their victim because they can't wrap their head around the fact that that's what's going on, that they're hurting someone. Or if they do, they don't believe that there's a way to avoid it, or fix it, or change.

The mythologized model of the Evil Abuser who hurts the Innocent Victim because they're a Bad Person is more likely to create that exact kind of mental block than it is to protect anyone from harm. It makes every mistake the end, a personal apocalypse that collapses the situation around your feelings rather than addressing the harm done. It's dangerous.

Let go of the idea of Good People and Bad People. We're all just people, and we're gonna hurt each other sometimes. It doesn't need to be anything more than that. You can apologize, and try to change. You can be imperfect and still worth loving. If someone asserts otherwise, that says more about them than it does about you.

tbh in some cases calling my projects "wips" kinda feels like a joke, because it implies that it's actually "in progress" rather than being a thing that plagues my brain every once in a while.

We have 30 days until the National Environmental Policy Act (NEPA) laws are rescinded. This is the 50-year bedrock of American conservation. Normally, these actions take years but the administration has provided 30 days for public comment gutting clean water and clean air. Drop what you’re doing, before you make any more calls or read any more social media posts, please populate the Federal Register with dissent.

A. Go to https://www.federalregister.gov/documents/2025/02/25/2025-03014/removal-of-national-environmental-policy-act-implementing-regulations

B. Click on the green rectangle in the upper right corner ("SUBMIT A PUBLIC COMMENT") .

C. Fill in your comment, and info at the bottom, and SUBMIT COMMENT.

living with gluten-free diet is like no it's ok don't worry about me I can manage

but then looking like this when someone else asks if there are any gluten free options before you can even mention it

Boy went (and still is going) through it

One of the most beautiful things TOH has done is these three these beautiful Blight siblings

When we meet Edric and Emira we see their relationship with Amity is strain at best toxic at worse and I'll forever blame Odaliea for it

This woman pitted her children against each other and made sure the three were always against each other in some shape or form

Always referring Edric and Emira as the twins, always tying them together and making it seem as they are one instead of two separate individuals

{Emiras fear of being stuck with Edric forever showed that her biggest fear was never being seen as her own person which could have caused resentment and anger towards her brother}

Edric had seen himself as burden and someone who was always messing up and doubted himself a lot

Amity was put a lot of pressure by her mother but I have the feeling that she also purposely shown more love towards the twins {referring them to adorable scoundrels in front of Amity and them never getting into trouble} to keep them further apart

Lost in Language we saw how Edric and Emira wanted to teach Amity a lesson by threatening her with her diary while Amity was always telling on Edric and Emira its moments like this that gave us a small look at how Odealia treated them.

In a way Odealia convinced them that in order to have either a) her approval or b) to not be punished they had to find a way to hurt the other so the other will be okay

And yet, and yet the twins saw the error of their ways they apologized to Amity, they still do so because they felt guilty for hurting her

Amity began to care and worry for her siblings and we begin to see how much they love and care for each other.

Emira encouraging Amity to try the spell and giving her a pep talk showing her little sister she had confidence in her

The twins helping Amity and Luz with Grom, Amity and her siblings spending time together outside of Luz Edric and Emira sneaking them in the factory

hell we see Emira doing her hair {for me that was huge because for me my hair is important and only allow people i trust to touch it so seeing Emira and Amity have that moment it meant a lot to me} and Edric in her room but also giving her advice.

Edric and Emira helping Amity with the brawl and even getting mad at their dad when he wouldn't let Amity help him etc.

Edric and Emira coming to terms that they can have their own identity without losing the other that they can still be twins but be seen as their own person

The Blight siblings could have hated each other could've spent the entire show tolerating each other and only interacting the way most media siblings do making snarky remarks to each other hating on each other and only having moments when it was convenient to the plot

Odealia could've succeeded in making sure these three hated each other that they didn't interacted as much and kept putting up with one another but she didn't instead we got three siblings who put their differences aside acknowledge their wrong doings, apologized for it, and in the end got a sibling relationship that is built on mutual trust respect and above all love.

Edric Emria and Amity have come so far and grown so much the three have a beautiful bond one that they themselves were able to save and create something beautiful

OH MY TITAN THIS IS PERFECT

Emira: Why are there three golden retrievers in your bedroom?

Edric: They're golden retrievers. They retrieve gold. They'll help me retrieve the golden guard. This is a flawless plan.