Image Description: The "I Bring A Sort Of X Vibe To X That X Don't Really Like" Edited To Say "I Bring

In highschool I wrote a story about a middle-generation of stellar travelers. Their parents were born on earth and left as children, and the middle generation will not live long enough to see their destination. They live their entire lives on the ship and I wrote about them trying to find their place in everything. They will never know blue skies and warm beaches and open fields with warm breezes. They’ll never know birdsong or crickets or frogs. They’ll never hear the rain on the roof of a dreary day. I never could find the right way to end the story. I wanted it to be a happy ending, but I didn’t know how to do it.

I realize now that it was a book about me dealing with depression before I even knew it. Looking back at how blatant the projecting was, it’s obvious now. It wasn’t then.

In the story, the middle-generation people are lost. They’re apathetic. They’re just a placeholder. The only job they have is to keep the ship running, have kids, and die. As the middle generation of people began becoming adults, suicide rates were skyrocketing. Crime and drug rates were jumping. This generation was completely apathetic because they felt that they had no use.

In the story, a small group of people in the middle-generation create the Weather Project. They turn the ship into a terrarium. They make magnificent gardens and take the DNA of animals they took with them and recreate them and they make this cold, metal spaceship that they have to live their entire lives on into a home. They take what little they have and they break it and rearrange it into something beautiful. They take this radical idea and turn the ship into a wonderful jungle of trees and birds and sunshine.

And I realize now how much it reflects my state of mind as I transitioned from a child into an adult while dealing with depression. You always hear “it gets better” and “when you’re older things will be easier” and I was so sick of waiting for it to get better. I was in the middle-generation stage. And I was sick of it. I was so sick of waiting.

When I was in highschool I didn’t know how to end the story. I didn’t know how to have a happy ending. I didn’t have the life experience then to finish the story in a meaningful way. I didn’t know how to make it better for these middle-generation characters.

But now that I’m older, I’m learning. That if you sit and wait for things to get better, it never will. You have to take your life and break it apart and rearrange it into something beautiful. You have to make the cold metal ship into the garden that you deserve. You have to make your own meaning. You have to plant your own garden.

You have to teach yourself that being happy is not a radical idea.

it’s disability pride month so i want to talk about one of my least favorite stigmas around celiac disease

in lots of media, being gluten free is played as a joke or something someone is to be annoying/pretentious. the amount of times i’ve heard jokes like that is honestly disheartening.

it also doesn’t help with the general population’s belief that celiac disease/gluten sensitivities are not serious. i’ve been diagnosed with celiac disease for 3 years now, i’ve been gluten free for about 4, and it has substantially improved my quality of life. i can’t afford risking cross-contamination because it leaves me sick for days. nearly every time i have a reaction to gluten, it’s hard for me to even drink water the next day because my body is an absolute mess. i’m miserable and fatigued for days until my body heals. not to mention the long term effects that have left me unable to stand/walk around for extended periods of time because my joints are pretty weak.

being gluten free NEEDS to be taken seriously. it’s not a choice i’ve made because i’m hoping on the latest fad, its not a preference, it’s an autoimmune disorder.

ur future nurse is using chapgpt to glide thru school u better take care of urself

AsDAFSDGFHGD TWO DAYS LEFT OF PRIDE HERE YOU GO :D!!!!!

all my gender/sexuality hc as icons!!!

we got uh,, trans aro/ace Lloyd, bi demi Kai, mlm Cole, Bi wife Nya (<3), genderfluid (all pronouns) ace/bi Zane, trans lesbian Skylor, enby Morro (obviously :P), pan demi Pixal, bi trans Jay aaa..

...aaand ✨her✨(lesbian Harumi <33)

(read tags plz)

The Collector stumbles upon a regular mirror.

It reminds them of

Something

Having celiac/coeliac disease is so bizzare, like it's all casual that eating gluten will give me cancer or dissolve the inside of my intestine so it can't do anything and I'll starve to death even while feasting like a king like I'm in some kind of Lovecraftian horror... and then everywhere I turn people are making "hehe this person is sooooo annoying for being gluten free" jokes

Unhinged rant

So what if Mitsuri joined the Demon Slayer Corps to find love?

So did Zenitsu. Nezuko is all he can talk and think about. His first scene is him literally begging a girl to marry him.

Tengen constantly talks about his wives and his love for them. A love so great that it is the main driving force behind ALL of his major life decisions. He left his toxic family because of them, he joined the Corps because of them, he decided to retire and left the Corps because of them. He has stated how they're his main reason for living, and how he considers their wellbeing and importance above his.

Tamayo is Yushiro's entire world, so much so that he's content being absolutely devoted to this woman and her goals, even though he knows that she's still in love with her husband. He's just content with being by her side and supporting her in everything, even if it goes against his best interests.

Obanai literally teleported 3 feet because he got a letter from Mitsuri and proceeds to read it with the ferocity of a lovesick teen who just got a text back. He's shown to be utterly in love with her and cares about her wellbeing and comfort.

The main cause of Giyuu's depression is because Sabito, his first love, died! And one of the things that brings him out of it is the thought of making and giving Sanemi, his new crush, his favorite food.

Yorichii, the strongest character in KnY, just wanted to have a family with the love of his life, Uta. His very first proper introduction has him holding a baby, FOR SUCKS SAKE!! We don't even see his expression because the yearning was that deep! When a character in KnY is framed from the back, you know the emotion is strong.

Genya is always flustered and horny when he's in the same airspace as or even thinks about a girl.

Hakuji not only took care of Koyuki but loved her so much that it permeates through his BDA as Akaza even though his memory was wiped. His soul remembers and honors her even if his mind doesn't.

The main reason Gyutaro hated Uzui was because he's a chad and was getting hoes.

Shinjuro Rengoku had a decade-long crashout because Rika died.

But yea no, let's shit on this ONE female character for the crime of wanting love and a family. Just say you hate women and go.

Tw: ed + a bit of blood

his ed isn’t talked about enough :/

as someone who also has arfid I find it sad how little it’s talked about :(

The most basic thing to say ever but Lloyd’s childhood has affected him so heavily as he’s grown up. When he was trying to imitate his dad, back when he was “bad” and “evil,” he was totally alone. He was basically ostracized that entire time during and after Darkley’s. It was only after he got taken in by the team and becoming a “good guy,” the destined “green ninja” that he was given even a little bit of support and love. Which is like pretty good, right? He stops being a little menace and gets the support and the guidance he’s so desperately needed his whole life.

These early experiences completely inform his perspective on things though, maybe at a more subconscious level, I guess. I think it all gets interpreted in his brain like this: When I’m evil I’m sad and alone, and when I’m good I get to be safe and happy and stuff. Which again like, maybe those are the kind of associations you’d want to instill in a child. But Lloyd really, intensely does not want to be left alone again. And he feels the only way to ensure that this does not happen is to be as “good” as possible; pushing down any kind of bad feeling or impulse he might have. Lloyd feels like he has to be “perfect” or else everyone will leave him. And anytime he does end up losing someone he interprets it as him somehow not being good enough to save them/help them/whatever. Which is obviously illogical cuz he is just some guy at the end of the day and that means he’s gonna do things that are considered “bad” sometimes!!!! Its the abandonment issues + the perfectionism I’ve cracked it I’ve cracked what’s wrong with our boy (<<< is repeating what ppl have probably been saying forever)