Hello, Yes, I Did Not Watch The Show And I Still Get Peer Pressured Into Stuff.

Just remembered a dream I had last night.

(+18 mentions, be warned)

So, the dream was about Gru and the minions, right? So, Gru was making the minions build a new place, and for some weird reason every few minutes while in the base, Gru would close his eyes and the next thing I knew he's half naked and a bunch of minions are opening his legs for another minion to enter him... Yea.... It was a weird dream....

Have fun with the mental image!!

some favorite moments from orv read :)c

Radioactive Hero (but not really) au

Danny moves to Gotham, hear him out! There's really good jobs there that pay through the nose and the cost of living is cheap!

Plus, the city is riddled with heroes and vilains! It's so easy to slip under the radar!

Unfortunately, there are so many civilian casualties. Like, all the time. Even in Metropolis!

So Danny, for his first year in Gotham, opens small portals to the Far Frozen and gets schooled on being a field medic. None of his powers can really be used for healing, but they can make people feel better. He just has to be careful to be as far removed from the Phantom moniker as possible, so he can't use any obvious powers.

He gets a bit of a reputation in Gotham; a small time hero of the people, for the people. A hero not invested in fighting, but in dragging civilians away from the danger. He doesn't even have a moniker; people are too busy arguing over the best one for him.

So while aliens are attacking both Metropolis and Gotham, Danny is out in full kit; a gas mask to hide his face, all black, repurposed kevlar from the vests the GCPD did not properly dispose of, no identifying markers.

But one of the clean up crews notices something insanely worrying; the geiger counter they have to point at alien spaceship parts? Yeah. Yeah, it's going off when they point it at the new small-time hero.

That hero's power is radioactivity. Holy shit. It's not at a level that will hurt people, but when he's dodging through fighting the level goes up.

The clean up crew concludes and shares via Twitter that the medic-hero is only a danger to others if he gets too stressed.

Word spreads fast, and pretty soon the absolute second Danny shows up on a scene, all fighting stops.

After all, no one wants to piss off the living Nuclear Bomb.

Basically, Danny's ghost-everything sets off Geiger counters, and now absolutely everyone is convinced that the medic-themed hero only refuses to fight because his meta power is just...being radioactive.

But he isn't.

So now, because it's the perfect cover and completely disassociated from Phantom, he has to play along and pretend like yes; that is his power.

"Special delivery!" Shouted a boy, who should not be here at all speeding towards them on a hoverboard. Easily dodging the attacks that flew at him due to his sudden entrance with tricks and teases of "Miss me!" or "Even my dad can shoot better than that!"

Regardless, he came to a quick stop before the Flash, rummaged around in his pocket and throwing something into the air that quickly became a green shield that looked like a Lantern contruct but yet not quite.

"Fenton-made Ghost Shield Generator, or GSG for short." The kid shrugged, quickly reaching into his fanny pack and pulling out a full box of takeout that shouldn't have been able to full in there, warm and ready, and held it out to the Flash. "Usually, I would charge extra for it, but you can have it on the house!"

Flash and the boy exchanged their goods, food for money that the boy swiftly counted through. Unconcerned that he's one a battlefield while Flash ate his food.

"I might order from you again, honestly." Flash said, and the boy gave him a smile. "Please do! It's not every day we get someone from the League as a customer! Oh right!" The boy dug around in his pocket for something, pulling out a glowing green sticky note and putting onto the Flash's forehead.

Who didn't take any offense to the action, only letting out a confused gesture towards it.

"Something about warning you about something in the future, I don't know really." The boy shrugged, adjusting his stance on his hoverboard and hitting a button with his foot. "All his sticky notes are really cryptic though, cause he's just like that."

The GSG dropped into the boy's hand, staring at it for a moment before throwing it over to the Flash. "Eh, you can keep that. I can just ask my parents for another one anyway." He sped off, giving the hero a wave as he cackled while dodging more attacks. "Keep up the great work!"

Then he disappeared into a green portal, which closed behind him as quickly as it opened.

Shazam x PJO

I wanna make a Shazam x Percy Jackson crossover where basically Billy as the Gods champion + living in DCU

so is super chill as he arrives in PJO world

Zeus absolutey adores his champion as his sponsers do.

Billy is basically BAMF because Hera and the other gods who do no know Billy are like that one meme

Daddy?

uhh...Okay!

Billy is there's now and the Demigods are very confused on why everyone is being so respectful\

I really just want this fanfic to be Billy BAMF and chill

and Demigods confused and jealous

DPxDC More Shit Fae!Danny Has Said While Living With Waynes

Dick, opening his arms wide and going for a hug: hey, Danny!

Danny, looking him in the eyes without blinking: did you know that centuries ago fae really liked to crawl inside human bodies and use them as nests? I heard human insides are really warm and squishy.

Dick, sweating, frozen in place: ...no?..

Danny, smiling and cheerfully jumping to hug Dick: I didn't either!

Jason, because he is feeling adventurous today: I have a question. Where do Fae come from?

Danny: Ah, so B hadn't had the Talk with you yet, what a shame. So when a woman and a man love each other very much-

Damian: Enough of your foolish jokes, I do not wish to hear the sex talk from you. To answer your question, Todd, Fae come from the dreams.

Jason, deadpan: ...really?

Danny, very awkwardly: Um. Dami. Brother to my soul. I'm so sorry.

Damian: What?

Danny: I told you we come from dreams only because you were four. That's not actually how it works. We just fuck.

Duke, narrowing his eyes at Danny suspiciously: So, for the past week and a half, I've been having this recurring dream about you eating my brain with a fork like spaghetti. I was wondering, is it, like, a you thing or a me thing?

Danny, very offended: Duke! Not every weird thing that happens in this house is my fault! That is very rude of you!

Cass, after Duke had apologized profusely and left: You.

Danny, rolling his eyes: Yeah, okay, I did do that. In my defense, his fear tastes like the perfect greasy cheeseburger, and I have to get my fair share of junk food somehow.

Cass: >:(

Danny: Okay, I'll stop. Eventually.

Bruce, in his nth attempt at gaining information from Danny: How do you know if someone is a Fae or not?

Danny: Throw a fish at them.

Bruce: ????

Danny, not even looking up from his phone: Fish are scared of the Fae. So if you throw a fish at someone and the fish gets scared, they are Fae.

Gotham Rogues a week later: We have no idea why Batman keeps throwing guppies at us, but we collectively suspect his new child is to blame.

Danny: Oh, I'm forbidden to enjoy caraoke nights.

Steph, who suggested he join: What? Why? Is it some kind of punishment for the pizza incident?

Tim: No, it's because if he starts singing, we all lose our grip on reality.

Damian: And our dignity.

Danny: They mean they start dancing whether they want it or not, and I have videos to prove it. Wanna see Jason twerking? Or I have one with Tim and Bruce waltzing through the manor.

Steph, as everyone else bemoans their fate: With great pleasure.

| <- prev | next ? |

@violet-foxe

“Welcome to BatBurger. Home of the BatBurger. How may I take your order?”

“With a smile of course!” The Joker cackled as he pulled out a canister and threw it at the cashier.

“Nuh-uh.” The cashier deadpans before throwing the canister back.

“The fuck you mean ‘Nuh-uh’?” Joker yelled throwing the canister back.

“Don’t wanna.” The cashier replied while smacking the canister out of the air and directly into the Joker's hand.

“Why you little!” The Joker threw the canister on the ground and lunged at the cashier.

🕐🕑🕒🕓🕔🕕🕖

“And what happened after that?” Commissioner Gorden asked the young man in front of him.

“He tripped.” The young man said with a shrug.

“Uh-huh.” Gorden hummed as he looked over where the body bag was being pulled out of the restaurant. “And the holes?”

“I guess the canister finally went off. It's such a shame really. I didn’t even get to deliver a decent punchline.”

“Right… And what was your name again?”

“Oh, it’s Danny. Danny Fenton. But you won’t be able to find me if you look me up.” The young man, Danny, said with a shit-eating grin.

“You know you’re not supposed to admit to going by a fake identity right?” Gordan asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Ya, but it is my real name. You just won’t be able to find it.” Danny said as he shifted his gaze to the shadowed figgier in the nearby alleyway. “Not even you, Big Bat. But you're free to try.”

“Hn.” Batman grunted before stepping back further into the shadows and disappearing.

“Why do I feel like you are about to be… and he’s gone. Why do I even bother?” Gordan sighed as he looked away from where the Bat vanished and back to where Danny was supposed to be. He grumbled as he put his notebook away and started for his car. His car, that now had a little green sticky note on it.

A few glimpses into Danny and Billy's lives.

Marvel: *bursts into the Hall of Justice* Phantom! You destroyed our children?!

Danny: Yes, I did.

Justice League: *shocked silence*

Marvel: Why?!

Danny: They were dead, I didn't want them to rot before my eyes.

Marvel: I could have brought them back to life!

Danny: Darling, that's cheating.

Marvel: No, it's not. You could have at least let me say goodbye!

Danny: Honey, we've been through this a hundred times. You'll cry for a week again, and then you'll get new ones. And then you'll start all over again.

Billy and Danny were talking about their plants, which Billy was very persistent in growing, but they still died. The League doesn't know about this and looks at the two in shock. Since when does Marvel have children besides the five and Dani? Why are they DYING?! And why is the Phantom so calm about it?! And does Marvel really make babies again when the old ones die?! He's not innocent?! And wait... Marvel can resurrect people?! Batman's paranoia has increased many times over.

Danny and Billy: *loudly arguing in a long-extinct language*

Flash: What are they arguing about?

Voltage (Freddy): The usual quarrels of ordinary people. Marvel threatens to divorce the Phantom, who actively denies his guilt.

Flash: Wait! The Phantom and Marvel are married?!

Voltage: Yeah, about a year. I thought you knew. The Captain took a month off for his honeymoon then.

Hal: Kid, we didn't know anything about this! Cap didn't tell us anything!

Batman: What's the reason for the fight?

Voltage: Something about another custody battle. Don't pay attention. They can always quarrel over trifles, but then they always kiss. I advise you not to be near this moment. It's disgusting.

The League looks in shock at the already kissing Phantom and Marvel. The Voltage winces and flies away. The heroes exchange glances and slowly leave.

Marvel: *covered in black blood* Darling! Guess who's back from jail!

Danny: You work there. And you fought with Zonus again? Don't come near me, wash up.

Marvel: But I love you so much.

Danny: *hisses and flies away*

Marvel: *laughs and runs after him*

Superman: He fought with Zonus?

Ms. Marvel: He does. The New Gods are betting on them.

Superman: What?

Klarion: Ugh, I hate it when they do that.

Zatanna: Do they flirt a lot?

Klarion: Every damn time. I feel sick watching them.

Nightwing: Shit! They went horizontal! Everybody get out! Get out!

More on Lanterns and Marvel

See original post here: https://www.tumblr.com/moonlightcycle571/765612915343704064/lantern-corps-and-a-10-year-old-child-in-a-last

I talked about the Lantern list (a ranking of people who to this day refuse lantern offers) and having Billy Batson be number 1, and have Captain Marvel be number 2.

This would naturally attract the attention of Lantern Cores everywhere (like what do you mean they received offers from multiple lanterns multiple times), the space community (why does the Terra City of Fawcette have dominating spots) as well as the JL (Cap, why are you outclassed by a civilian from your own city).

I also fully believe Lois Lane is on the same boat as Billy Batson when it comes to Lantern offers. One does not jump off buildings or sneak into war zones without a great deal of will power and induce a great deal of fear. Lois Lane is definitely in the top 10.

Coincidentally, in the top 50, you will find Cat Grant, Vic Sage and surprisingly Vicki Vale (if she can make BATMAN shudder and be wary of her, she can make anyone fear her).

So it’s been accepted that journalists have a lot of will power, a lot of rage and can put the fear of god into you. Clark is not bitter that he’s not on the list, no sire. Never mind that Jimmy Olsen is in the Top 100.

Batman might want to study this phenomenon.

But anyways. One does not stay at the top without ridiculous numbers. As the only top 10 ers on earth, they have grown used to random rings trying to get them on space politics quests or whatnot.

So now imagine this: Lois Lane and Billy collab on a project. While they are speaking, random rings start to show up. Instinctively, both swat them away like flies while maintaining eye contact. They don’t realise what they are doing. Clark is having an aneurism.

At some point, they both realise that the other is swatting the rings away with the same nonchalance as the other. They immediately understand what’s up. The shit eating grin they both had made a bunch of yellow rings swarm around them.

Billy gets asked on why he doesn’t want to join the Green lanterns? Billy says it’s because he hates cops. Lois nods.

Hal cries himself to sleep that night.

Bonus:

Batman stalking a civilian named Batson who for some reason is number one in the Lanterns List, with an alarming amount of yellows.

Batman finds a black hair, blue eyes, orphan child.

Batman: Alfred call the guy

Bonus 2:

Nightwing, trying to meet his future maybe brother: Hi 👋

Billy, sees an authority figure in Blue that wields batons and electricity: …

Billy immediately kicks Nightwing while yelling ACAB

Billy runs away

Nightwing cries himself to sleep that night.

people who don't wear glasses are so weird like you just wake up and your eyes are pussy fresh??