Since Side Order, I've Been Treating Pearlina As De Facto Canon, As Have Many. What I Want To Know Now

Pearl: *Accidentally bumps into Marina* Pearl: *trying to decide between "Are you okay" and "I'm sorry"* Pearl: ARE YOU F%#KING SORRY??? Marina: *distressed and confused girlfriend noises*

Captain- I have feelings for you!

8- ??

Captain- Not telling which ones though!

8-???????

Marie- Hiya champ, how was school today?

Captain- Okay haha get your jokes out now.

Shiver- So cranky.

Marie- You want a juice box and some string cheese?

Captain- Do you actually have that?

(Halloween)

Callie- Are you Thor?

Pearl- No, I’m five.

Neo3- BOO!

Captain- 

Neo3- :’(

Captain- aaAH!

Captain- I lost my son, can I make an announcement?

8- Sure! 

Captain*over the intercom*- Agent 4……. Goodbye you little shit.

Pearl- Okay okay, let’s make this easier. I WONT TAKE YOU HEAD AND SMASH IT AGAINST THE-

Marie- Okay! Okay P, let’s cool down. I’ll take over.

Captain- *walks in the room* 

*fighting, crashing, other bad noises*

Captain- FOUR!

Agent4- Three! Hi!

Agent4- *gets punched*

Captain- FOUR! WHAT DID YOU DO I WAS KICKED OUT FOR THREE HOURS!

Agent4- All is forgiven you’re the leader again welcome back!

(HC that Agent 4 still calls Captain “Three”)

Marie- Awww it’s too bad I can’t play my violin while I drive.

Agent4 & Captain- >:(

Captain- We can’t just rush in there! We need a plan.

Neo3- Why?

Captain- Hey, I wanted to say-

Agent4- you don’t have to apologize.

Captain- I wasn’t going to.

Agent4- Oh.

Agent4- Good!

Agent4- Pish posh and tut tut my good man.

Neo3- ………

Neo3- HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO HIDE IN THE WOODS THERES NO DOORS

Agent4- We could climb a tree?

Neo3- THATS THE FIRST PLACE HE’S GONNA LOOK! Could be burrow? Do animals burrow in the wild?!

Agent4- I DONT KNOW IVE NEVER BEEN IN THE WILD BEFORE! Have you?!

Neo3- Uhhhh… does jersey count?

Agent4- Is this seat taken?

Captain- No.

Agent4- Cool. *goes to sit down*

Captain- what are you doing?

Agent4- Sitting?

Captain- Uhuh yeah no. Yeah you can’t do that.

Agent4- You said it wasn’t taken?

Captain- Yeah and let’s keep it that way!

Captain- Vape? No, it’s a 3D printed dragon that’s made of roses! I’d like to give this to someone for Valentine’s Day but unfortunately, I live a life of crushing loneliness that spirals me further and further everyday into a deep dark pit of depression, making me think that I may never find love and I’m gonna die alone.

8- I got you chocolates.

Callie- USE THOSE MUSSELS YOU WORKED SO HARD FOR

Neo3- He stopped working out last week

Callie- Why’d he stop- WHY’D YOU STOP WORKING OUT?

Captain(from afar)- I WAS SAD!

Frye- Like a footless chicken

Marie- the phrase is “like a headless chicken”

Frye- How would a headless chicken run around its headless

Marie- how would a footless chicken run around its footless?

Frye- why are you asking me all the questions I don’t know I’m not the chicken!

Agent4: Sure is dark in here.

Neo3:

Agent4: I'm not scared or anything.

Neo3:

Agent4: I mean, who's scared of the dark these days? Not me. Nope.

Neo3: Do you want me to hold your hand?

Agent4:

Agent4: Yes please.

BigMan- Ay. Ay ay. (You enter the dungeon. On the far side of the room there is a door.)

Agent4- Can I seduce the door?

BigMan- Ay. (No you cannot.)

Shiver- Can I seduce the door?

BigMan- Ay. (Also no.)

Captain- Can I punch Four?

BigMan- Ay, ay ay. (Uh, Agent 4 you take four damage.)

Agent4- I transform into a beaver.

BigMan- Ay… ay. (You… do that.)

Agent4- Now can I seduce the door?

BigMan- AY. AY. (STILL. NO.)

Captain- I punch Four again.

BigMan- Ay. (Three more damage.)

Agent8- Can I fight the door?

BigMan- AY! (NO!)

Marie- Uh, I also would like to fight the door?

BigMan- Ay ay. (No one can fight the door.)

Pearl- I FIGHT THE DOOR.

BigMan- Ay. (You lose.)

Pearl- I FIGHT YOU.

BigMan- Ay, ay. (Pearl, take a walk.)

Marie- Is the door dead or alive?

BigMan- Ay… ay. (It’s… a door.)

Marie- Can I enslave it’s soul?

BigMan- Ay… (How would you…)

Marie-

BigMan-

BigMan- Ay! (No!)

Agent8- Can I build a better door?

BigMan- Ay? (Do you want to build a better door?)

Agent8- I acquire lumber from the surrounding forest.

BigMan- Ay, ay ay. (Okay, you do that.)

Frye- Is the door locked?

BigMan- Ay. (No.)

Frye- I open the door.

BigMan- Ay, ay ay. (You do so, inside is a small treasure chest.)

Shiver- I SEDUCE THE TREASURE CHEST!

BigMan- AY!!! (NO!!!)

This A Friendship Almost Too Romantic — Submitted by nemethos-deamon

#7FB8B3 #B8DBC4 #FFD1BA #FFAB91 #CC8C3D #D1AF4F

Zane: "on a scale from 'damn daniel' to 'fre sha vaca do', how are you feeling?"

Jay: "in between 'it’s an avocado, thanks' and 'how did you defeat Captain America', but as a solid answer i would say 'i don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger'. how about you, Cole?"

Cole: "probably 'road work ahead' "

Kai: "i speak many languages, and this is not one of them."

Papers of Homelessness - Chapter 1

A/N: first chapter!!! so excited. don’t forget to comment your thoughts ^^

warnings: violence.

enjoy~

edited 10/02/2017

NEXT

“Okay, I’m heading out!” You called from the door just as you walked through it and closed it, hearing the muffled ‘stay safe’ your mother called from behind the now closed door. Rolling your eyes, you pulled on a jacket and took off to the street, turning left into the more deserted part of the city.

So okay… you’re not supposed to take this route, but it’s a real shortcut and you have never been in danger throughout the year you have been using it.

Your mother was just being paranoid as usual.

Keep reading

Sorry for the long post and the rough, off-model sketches. But post-apocalyptic ROTTMNT has its talons deep in my heart and I have to get it off my chest. There will be more. And it will be painful. I apologize in advance. Also FYI: this is is when they’re in their early 30’s.

NEXT

LEGO - Rubber Duck 

A little title card for the next chapter…. The first pages of Ch 2 will be posted this Saturday (7/21)! Which I only just now realized is during the Inkling VS Octo Splatfest? How….fitting LMAO