She Left Me In November,

Ruthless

My heart aches as you walk near

You, who've once taken everything I held dear

You have some nerve to come to me

When you made certain to ruin who I could be

Are you here to gloat, parade your victory?

I want to go, but you won't set me free

And I'm tired, I have nothing left to give

I wish you wouldn't come back once you leave.

Hoping

I wonder if I flit through your mind

If there are times you still try to find

Me, in those songs, those places

If in your life, I left some spaces

For you part me with a void, an aching in my soul

The face I look for in the crowd, the name I try to howl

Or maybe you don't even remember

The girl you've given a hasty farewell that chilly December.

Afloat

I'm in a perpetual state of numbness

Forgotten how to feel, how to be

I only have my pen as a witness

Stranded in this strange, bleak sea

I have been alone in this boat for so long

Plugging holes with paper

Coldness seeping to the pages and my bones

My oars swallowed by the water

Maybe I'd let this sink in the deeps below

Release the burdens of sorrow

And I'll be free, unencumbered by tomorrow.

What I Hate Most

Often I wonder if I'll ever hear your voice again

'Cause I can no longer remember its sound, its tone

I can only feel the warmth it brings when it rains

The way it made my heart skips, the way it chilled my bones

I wonder if you still laugh the same

If my soul, your singing can still tame

'Cause all I have now is a dusty memory

One that's leaving me, leaving me slowly

So here I am, still hoping against it all

That you'll one day give me call

That once again, I'll feel that honey dripping in my ears

Just so I can be reminded, there's someone real behind these tears.

I watch the pebble skips in the water

As my heart flips, flips, flips

The ghost of your touch, my knees waver

And I weep, weep, weep.

I float, empty, a husk

In solitude, I bask

Don't let me, don't let me drown

Fill this void and anchor me down.

Will you ever come back?

i don't know how i can describe you

you're like my guardian angel who suddenly flew

leaving me overwhelmed by your greatness

since then, looking for you became my quest

you became my anchor to the real world

in the midst of coals, you became my gold

i hold on to you with everything i have

i lay at your feet all that i love

you made me happy like i thought i'd never be

in my own tiny prison, you set me free

right then, i thought something might last

but as i turn around, you became my past

as i sat there, feeling numb

i ask myself, how i can be so dumb?

that i have never realized, you were there only for a season

that you only came to teach me a painful lesson.

-D.G. Gir// 04/04/2018