He Pretends To Be Too Tired To Walk To Get Batman To Carry Him To The Batmobile

*me, checking my own AO3 account to see if I have posted any new fic I’ve been waiting for yet*

me when my disabilities disable me:

okay but brucie wayne IS a single mom WHO DOES work two jobs who LOVES his kids and never stops!!! he has gentle hands AND a heart of a fighter!!! HE’S A SURVIVOR!!!

legitimately so scary that i just made a doctors appointment for 2025. you mean the far distant sci fi future 2025? you mean the pacific rim 2025? you mean i have to go to the doctor while giant robots are fighting the fucking kaiju? fuck all the way offfffffff

I haven't been in the fandom long, but I think I've noticed a trend...

I like some angst just as much as the next person but omg give this man a hug

Note: I am in no way saying I don't like angsty fanfictions (heck I have some pretty angsty head canons) I just find the sheer amount of them funny. And it just makes me wonder how (canon) Danny would react himself

I just wanted to make this clear that it's a joke- I always worry about my comics coming off the wrong way lol

i love high contrast photos of fruit floating threateningly in the night

Eddie, posting to Tiktok at three in the morning: I think it’s perfectly okay if you’re a restless sleeper or you sleepwalk. That’s fine. I just think you should have goals…that’s not leaving my house.

Eddie: That makes it sound like I kidnapped someone. I didn’t. It’s just… My husband has been walking around in a circle for the last fifteen minutes

Eddie: And I want to go to bed but I can’t until he does because he has this bad habit of escaping and ending up at a hospital…or the woods.

Eddie: And yeah, I’m glad he’s not trying to break my ribs or- *flinches in surprise when a hand is suddenly shoved in front of his face*

Eddie, eyes flickering off screen: …yes?

Steve, after a long pause: Six dollar

Eddie, who adores sleeptalking Steve: For what?

Steve: Book fair

Eddie: …I have never wanted to live in your brain more than I do right now.

advertisement should be illegal. this is based in the 3rd pillar of my belief system: leave me the fuck alone

"The next extermination would be something like this"

Ref: amphibia s2 the last episode

Batman: I don’t kill. It’s wrong.

Batman three minutes later putting on spiked brass knuckles: anyway did I ever tell you about how Superman is a much better person than me?