First Post

Throwback to the time I spent a lot of money on a gift to Sen's little sister... I really hope she liked it (´;ω;｀)

Would you enjoy a gift like this?

In the ring again

Trying to refresh again, let's see how sustainable it is like this.

God I hope it is. It's hard to live

look upon your sins

Need your favourite vegetable

And thoughts on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS)

carrot

kinda based

lol I really thought I was going to get in trouble with my parents for a bit but it was just turned into a life lesson jesus chris t that was a trip 

i am done with life for a little bit thank you very much please let me live out the rest of this week with nothing but hugs and cuddles it’s what I really need thank you

-Caramel

oof

I suppose I’ve just had the most unproductive weekend I’ve ever experienced. AP exams are closing in as well. A ton of schoolwork to do while the year closes in, a dying personal life, not mentioning the fact that I’m probably in trouble when it comes to extracurriculars. Missed some important harp stuff, so I’ll need to talk to my teacher about that.

Spilled my guts out to a friend over the past two days with little to no reaction, too, so I guess there’s that wonderful thing too. :/

Whenever I think it’s not possible to fall lower than this I end up surprising myself. Guess I should really just suck it up though. All this depressing stuff has been ruining my life and future, and I’ve done nothing to stop it.

Can’t really feel bad for myself anymore. This sucks. Maybe I am depressed, but I guess that’d be searching for excuses to inexcusable behavior. I should stop lying.

Whatever happened to determination?

First day in a life between lives

I’m in a really great mood today! I left my house- it felt really weird to be leaving while not completely integrated into either my old or new personality yet. Going out with friends, it felt similar to how I used to feel being dragged out, but more enjoyable- and somehow, brighter?

Not much cleaning has been done today, but I’ve still got ten days to get my new life together! I should probably get some more cleaning done before I go to bed, so that’s what I’m off to do once I’m done writing this post.

One more thing I’ve done that I’m really proud of- I’ve shown my blog to one of my closest friends!! It feels so good to have told someone else about my new life/personality, and I hope that having someone know about it will keep me on track and accomplishing my dreams!! Oh hello avocado friend :))))))

I’ll post again tomorrow, or maybe sometime tonight before I sleep. For now though, I’m leaving today feeling so accomplished! 

<3 Caramel

Calibrating

So far in the school year, things have been alright- balancing the APs I’m in has taken some time, but overall, things seem just fine.

I’m still trying to make a proper schedule for myself to follow, finding a lot of trouble when trying to actually stick to it. Maybe I just need motivation? Feels like I’m trying to get ahold of all this too late. It’s alright, though- at least I didn’t leave this until university.

My blog’s been looking pretty blank recently. In my free time, I’m thinking of adding a little gallery and maybe a music player? 

I’ll see if I can actually put something of this sort into my blog sometime soon- but no promises, especially since I’m still not sure how to manage my time TT

<3Caramel

Heart

I keep considering getting into writing. Ever since I was little, it’s been a thing that my sister and I have been decent at. She’s gone full send already, working on getting her book published- but I feel like I’d do better in multimedia projects.

You know, things with spacing, aura, timing? Instead of trusting your reader not to speed through and not feel a single thing.

Augh, whatever- it’s always been an option, and I guess it’ll stay that way. More of a skill than a job in this world anyways.

Maybe there's something in the air, maybe I'm sick, stressed, or just plain old lazy— but I can't seem to get myself to work these days. I sat by my desk all afternoon and evening today, but could barely get any work done at all.

My first final is tomorrow... are things really going to be okay..? I'd like to say I need a break, but what would the break be from? It's not like I've made enough progress on anything yet.

I wish it were spring or summer again, when I could go wherever I wanted with my friends. I miss taking the train.

Dissonance

Got left alone at the mall today but strangely I feel better, I just did the AP exam today and cried in an underground parking lot until my voice hurt but honestly I feel better than I did a couple days ago