Hon I Can't Believe No One Had Asked This But Can I Have Some Crack Nsfw With The Admirals? And Van Augur

Hon I can't believe no one had asked this but can I have some crack nsfw with the admirals? And Van augur pretty please? Make them as funny as possible I s2g I love your writings so much bless you

I’M GONNA SCREAM ILOVE YOU!

(ah yes, the VanAugur. The vondle angst. The Vroom Afternoon. The Vehicle Assblast.)

Akainu:

Thought it wouldbe sexy for some little Boss/Secretary roleplay. But ended upscolding his partner for breaking important company rules with anhour long lecture. That was not sexy at all.

Probably caughtsheets on fire once.

You know whenyou’re about to relax/sleep and you had forgotten to do something, soyou just kind of JOLT violently? Akainu does that. Akainu does thatwhile he’s doing the backwards, parallel parking, beta test tango.It’s not fun, at all. (And then you have to deal with him screaming“THE PAPERWORK.”)

Aokiji:

“There’s no needto be ice cold right now.” “Fifteen seconds away from stranglingyou.”

Can hold the mostcasual conversations in bed. Just talking about his day while he’snailing away, NBD.

His partner pulledhis hair and they had to stop and brush it out. You think he takescare of his hair? No. No he doesn’t.

Kizaru:

Lights his dickup. It’s a rave party in his pants.

He left hissunglasses on once during the entirety of the act. They didn’t evenshift from their spot at all.

Kizaru lovesbragging about his sex life to Akainu and Akainu alone. Why? BecauseAkainu’s a prude who gets dumped after two dates (probably.)

Fujitora:

Partner asked himto talk dirty once and he FROZE. “U-Uhm… I think, though notreally, you might have misbehaved?”

He’s made a dadjoke while balls deep in his partner. You’re welcome.

Literally so sweetI can’t even make crack hcs. Like, this man would stop and get hispartner lunch if they vaguely mentioned it.

Van Augur:

I know I’vementioned that he has terrible aim. But come on, Augur, on the walls?The walls???

Everyone thinks heknows what he’s doing, but honestly he just wings it. Tell no one,it’s his secret. His shame (besides his weird hat.)

His partner triedto take off his weird glasses/goggles and had to spend way too muchtime figuring out if they were proper glasses or goggles.

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ɴᴀᴍᴇ:  Kuro ᴀʟɪᴀs (ɴɪᴄᴋɴᴀᴍᴇs): Man of a Thousand Plans, Black Cat. ɢᴇɴᴅᴇʀ: Male. ᴀɢᴇ: 34 ᴅᴀᴛᴇ ᴏғ ʙɪʀᴛʜ: April 22nd sᴘᴏᴋᴇɴ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇs: English. ᴏᴄᴄᴜᴘᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: Hermit/Traveler/Occasional odd job ᴄʀɪᴍɪɴᴀʟ ʀᴇᴄᴏʀᴅ: Copious amounts of murder, pillaging, resisting arrest, Faking his own death. ᴅɪsᴏʀᴅᴇʀs: Dissociative identity disorder ᴇʏᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ: Hazel. ʜᴀɪʀ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ: Black. ʜᴇɪɢʜᴛ: 6′3 ( 190.5 cm ) sᴄᴀʀs: Small faded cuts on the sides of his thighs/ forearms from first learning to use his Cat Claws, perhaps a cut on his left side just above his hip. ʙᴜʀɴs: None. ᴏᴠᴇʀᴡᴇɪɢʜᴛ: No. ᴜɴᴅᴇʀᴡᴇɪɢʜᴛ: Yes. ғᴏᴏᴅ: Anything he can get his hands on that isn’t revolting to him, fish and milk are among his favorite. ʜᴀᴅ sᴇx: Yes. ʜᴀᴅ sᴇx ɪɴ ᴘᴜʙʟɪᴄ: No. ɢᴏᴛᴛᴇɴ ᴘʀᴇɢɴᴀɴᴛ: ᴋɪssᴇᴅ ᴀ ʙᴏʏ: Yes. ᴋɪssᴇᴅ ᴀ ɢɪʀʟ: Yes. ɢᴏᴛᴛᴇɴ ᴛᴀᴛᴛᴏᴏs: No. ɢᴏᴛᴛᴇɴ ᴘɪᴇʀᴄɪɴɢs: No. sᴍᴏᴋᴇᴅ/ᴅʀᴀɴᴋ/ᴅᴏɴᴇ ᴅʀᴜɢs: No/Yes/No. ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇɴ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ: No. ʙᴇᴇɴ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ: No. ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ sᴜʀɢᴇʀʏ: No. sᴛᴀʏᴇᴅ ᴜᴘ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴛʜᴀɴ 24 ʜᴏᴜʀs: Yes. ᴀ ᴠɪʀɢɪɴ: No. ᴀ ᴄᴜᴅᴅʟᴇʀ: sometimes ᴀ ᴋɪssᴇʀ: when the moment is right. sᴄᴀʀᴇᴅ ᴇᴀsɪʟʏ: No. ᴊᴇᴀʟᴏᴜs ᴇᴀsɪʟʏ: Yes. ᴛʀᴜsᴛᴡᴏʀᴛʜʏ: No. sɪɴɢʟᴇ: Yes except for certain verses ᴄᴏɴsɪᴅᴇʀᴇᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ: Yes. ʜᴀʀᴍᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍsᴇʟᴠᴇs: Yes. ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴏғ sᴜɪᴄɪᴅᴇ: Rarely ᴀᴛᴛᴇᴍᴘᴛᴇᴅ sᴜɪᴄɪᴅᴇ: Once perhaps. ғᴇᴀʀs: Being regarded as entirely worthless, spiders, having no purpose. sɪʙʟɪɴɢs: None that he knows of or cares. ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛs: Both were pirates, deceased. ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ: None other than having a litter in one verse dfhljsl ᴘᴇᴛ(s): various (stray) cats he adopted

6 years ago

[moonwalks into your frickin' askbox] let's fluff it up some with nero and augur. also ANHSFB IM LOVE U!!!! - ya snake mum

(You’ve been hit by- You’ve been struck by- A smooth criminal!) Oh my gosh! HI SNAKE MUM! I love that you have brought more of my favorite weasel boy to me. (Also, I’d like it known that I just saw Van Augur smile in the show for the first time and I nearly died. He’s so much handsomer than I remember!)

Nero Fluff Headcanons:

Nero is a little prankster with his partner and loves when he can sneak up on them. He uses Shave to appear at their side with a quick kiss on the cheek. If his partner squeaks or jumps in surprise, he’ll be chuckling about it for the rest of the day.

He brings his partner with him whenever he goes shopping because he likes to have their opinion on what to choose. Plus, while they’re out, Nero likes to buy his partner nice things, especially hats and necklaces that go with his own.

Nero likes mental challenges, so every day, at lunch, he and his partner do the newspaper’s crossword together. He pulls their chairs up together and they spend at least an hour bickering playfully about what the right answer is.

Nero is a hopeless romantic at heart. Occasionally, when his partner is distracted from him, he will switch up how he surprises them by dipping them. He’ll smirk the whole time, but if his partner gives him a compliment, he’ll let them get up again.

Van Augur Headcanons:

Augur isn’t a morning person. Since he knows how tough it can be to get up, he brings his partner a cup of coffee, fixed the way they like best, every morning. 

While he seems like a serious person, when Augur and his partner are alone together, he likes to tease them. It’s usually about little quirks of their’s and he gives them a confident smirk when they try to find ways to tease him back. (Take a picture of his bed head. That’ll shut him up.)

When Augur’s in deep thought, he tends to zone out and stare at nothing in particular. When his partner’s near him though, he’ll run his hands through their hair and has a habit of pushing a strand behind their ear without thinking.

Augur’s hat may protect him somewhat from the rain, but his partner might be caught off guard during one of their walks. When this happens, Augur holds his arm over their head and uses his cape as a temporary umbrella for them. He doesn’t mind that he’s sopping wet afterwards and hurries them back to the ship to warm up.

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caribou1 - abel scratchmen
abel scratchmen

Hi, I'm Keira! I love talking, One Piece, anime, and my family.

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