The Empyrean As Shitposts (OS Edition)

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(ʘ‿ʘ✿) “what you say ‘bout me”

(ʘ‿ʘ)ノ✿ “hold my flower”

Rosegarden, Cinderella, and Fairytale Romance

0r Why I Will Eat My Glass Slipper if Oscar and Ruby Don't Dance by the End of the Show

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Part of Ruby's arc in v9 is realizing that the ideals and dreams she had as a (younger) child are too ambitious and unrealistic. That life, huntresses, herself… they can't be like the fairytales.

It is a very big lesson to learn but, much like all things in RWBY, there is a push for nuance. Weiss and Blake even have called out in show that those storybook morals are too simplistic or black and white. Ruby is overwhelmed and breaking under the weight of her burdens and is being given the opportunity to either keep trudging on until it destroys her, or leave all of it behind.

But what about a secret hidden third option? Can she not leave Ruby Rose behind, not become someone entirely new, but rather… Choose to be the version of Ruby Rose she wants to be on purpose? And not as a result of other people's pressures or expectations that she's internalized for too long?

The point I'm trying to make here is that she can admit that holding herself to the impossible standard of an untouchable hero that always wins in the end isn't sustainable, but still find the intersection of fairytale and reality.

Now how does this tie in to RG? For that, I want to talk about two things:

The other canon romance plots in show

One of Ruby's smaller/more subtle 'allusions'

Of the three other big relationships in the show, each one's confession seems to fall into a very specific 'theme' (I understand I am generalizing/simplifying a bit but bare with me):

Arkos is rooted in tragedy: Pyrrha's death

2. Renora is rooted in reality: A two volume long conflict that ends in them acknowledging their feelings, talking it out, and agreeing to be patient with each other.

3. Bumbleby is rooted in a literal fairytale: A pocket dimension created specifically in the Ever After to push them into smooching (and y'know... confessing)

Rosegarden is currently in the tragedy stage. Constant separation over and over again leading up to Oscar being left in Remnant thinking she's dead and Ruby stuck in the Ever After not knowing how much time is passing back home and if he'll even be there when she gets back.

Reality we've seen for them a lot in how down to earth they are with each other. The constant quiet support. Oscar seeing past the pedestal, past the ideal, straight through to Ruby. Ruby seeing past the merge and seeing him fully as just Oscar.

But how do we tie the fairytale into it when Oscar isn't in Ever After to give them that storybook magic? Well, we go back to the earlier mentioned subtle allusion for Ruby: Cinderella.

NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. "But Chai!! We already have a very clear allusion to that character!!!"

Okay yes, but Ruby is a mirror to Cinder. We've seen it in their arcs as primary antagonists to each other, we've seen it in their costume designs with the parting of their hair and similar colour schemes. Cinder Fall, Ruby Rose (as in to rise). They are two sides of one coin.

Back at the dance in v2, Ruby arrives and is left alone by her friends. She isn't wearing glass slippers, but there is a whole lot of focus on how uncomfortable her shoes are.

She leaves the dance early after not having fun and runs into Cinder. And when the clock strikes midnight and the spell is broken? Cinder is at the dance in her pretty dress with Mercury and Ruby is back in the tower getting one of, if not the first big reality check(s) of the series.

This situation is teased by Oz in the episode prior with his little conversation with Ruby:

Ozpin: Not enjoying yourself? Ruby: Oh, no aha, everything's fine. I'm just not much of a... dance-y pantsy... dance-y girl. Ozpin: Well you can't spend your entire life on the battlefield, even if you may want to. Ruby: Yeah that lesson's been floating around a lot lately. Ozpin: If you think about it, fighting and dancing aren't so different. Two partners interlocked. Heh, although one wrong room on the ballroom merely leads to a swollen foot. Ruby:Or a twisted ankle Ozpin: It's not every day that friends are able to come together like this. Time has a way of testing our bonds. But it's nights like these that can help keep them stronger than ever. Nights like these are ones we'll never forget.

He teases that the dance is special. That Ruby should get to enjoy it because life has a funny way of creeping up quickly on these things. That these moments are rare and should be treasured... and he's proven right almost immediately.

Every other person in the cast got a dance - or something close to it - that night. Blake and Yang. Blake and Sun. Weiss lost her date 'cause Neptune's a goof, but they still got to sit down and talk. Jaune and Pyrrha had a moment on the balcony before he went to grab a dress and they all danced together. Ren and Nora. Penny even danced with one of her guards. Glynda and Ironwood too!!

But our hero didn't get one. All she got was a fight.

And see, this is where I think the 'fairytale' comes in. Ruby's had her reality check. Time and time and time again that fairytale spell has been broken. She is going through a metamorphosis throughout v9 to become a newly actualized version of herself, or at least find the start of the path that brings her there. But when she returns to Remnant what is waiting for her? More war. More fighting. More responsibility as being this symbol of hope and a leader for everyone. But part of her arc is learning to share her burdens with others. And the person that has consistently tried to do that with her without her asking for it, has been Oscar. Oscar, who is currently in Vacuo with who knows how much time passing wrestling with the knowledge that Ruby, the rest of her team, and Jaune are very likely dead. Oscar, who is now bearing the weight of this world saving mission without her there.

All I'm trying to say is that a celebration of sorts with a redemption dance, quite possibly in Vacuo, isn't entirely off the table. In fact I'd argue it's been teased since the very start, especially considering just how often they are posed as if they are asking each other to dance.

Also to go back to something Ozpin said "fighting and dancing aren't so different"... One of Oscar and Ruby's first scenes together, they are sparring in front of a sunset and they can't stop smiling at each other. They're just having so much fun with it.

Also their premiere moments in volumes 6, 7, and 9 are all RG in a fight of some kind. The first two Ruby is saving him from Grimm. The latter Ruby is being attacked by Neo's illusion of him. In volume 8, we don't get that. But we do get these two moments which also count for something (especially because dances and hugs are also quite similar in some ways):

There are going to be very high emotions when RWBYJ return to Remnant and what better way to celebrate that they are still alive than a party (and if not then, then after the war is over... but hopefully not THAT long). Where they can just 'dance and laugh and love… and just live'. Even for just a moment because who knows what the next will bring.

Ruby in v2 wasn't really a dance-y pantsy kind of girl... but post-v9 Ruby? She gets to choose the kind of girl she wants to be. Just the knight? Or maybe the princess too, even just for on day. And I think if anyone is going to offer her a chance to try it out, it's going to be her Little Prince.

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I love these normal kids with their very normal knees a very normal amount. I love how their respective 'specialness' makes them the perfect match for each other because it means they can be 'normal' together. That is all ty for listening. RG canon okay byeeeeee~

Beautiful

You know that conversation you can have with Emmrich where he asks what your plans are for your body when you die?

I think Arsinoë accidentally horrified him. Not by clinging to non-Nevarran ideals about cremation, but by telling him she never thought anyone would care that much one way or the other.

She would be dead, so she wouldn't care. And honestly, a majority of compradi die as Fledglings without graduating; she thinks their bodies were probably burned (since you have to do something with bodies) but they certainly don't have funerals, so it certainly wasn't worth worrying about then.

Emmrich interjects, trying to wrangle his own shock long enough to point out that she's not a Fledgling now, so surely...?

Well if she dies now, Arsinoë all but shrugs, it would depend on the circumstances, wouldn't it? She isn't someone important like a Talon or the scion of an established Crow family. She certainly isn't Caterina Dellamorte, who warrants something verging on a State Funeral.

If she died, there is still a non-zero chance it would be at another Crow's hands, in which case it's anyone's guess what happens after.

If she dies honorably fulfilling a contract, then Viago might feel obligated to do something if he isn't pissed off at her failure and she's isn't still in Exile. He's her mentor, so probably he would manage at least a small pyre. Maybe even a flower or two for the flames if he's letting himself feel sentimental. Teia would probably be there because Viago was.

But just as often, when a contract goes wrong, there's no time to go back for the body. The mark get ahold of it, or whoever's left on the contract has to focus on survival rather than the dignity of a corpse that can't feel any of it.

But really, none of that would matter to Arsinoë, would it? She'd be off wherever dead souls end up going, or maybe in oblivion, who knows. She doesn't have any family to be horrified by her corpse unless you count Viago, who is Fifth Talon, has bigger things to worry about, and will get over it.

But anyway, why do you ask, Emmrich?

Emmrich is too aghast to answer clearly at that point because every single point of Arsinoë's answer goes so deeply against everything that is ingrained in him as part of the Mourn Watch, from the belief that a corpse just doesn't matter to her sincere belief that no one would care enough about her for any particular mourning rights.

And the thing is Emmrich does care. It's his professional duty to care, but he's also become fond of his young friend and he cannot handle imagining that she could die on this mission or the next and potentially receive no rites at all.

Cue Emmrich starting to plan how he's going to have Rook interred in the Grand Necropolis when the time comes. It may involve some string pulling, especially if (hopefully) she dies not on this mission but in the distant future, and even more so if he precedes her and has to leave the job in one of his colleague's hands. But Maker help him, there will be a plan and her death will be respected.

When it comes to light, Neve is uncertain and a little weirded out, but also a little offended by all this. She's fallen in love with Rook, but even before that, the respect between them would have warranted a pyre and Arsinoë's name on the Wall of Light if there was no one else to arrange things. Is this why she's never asked about what happened after Varric-

Lucanis is horrified by the idea of Arsinoë as one of the spirit-possessed skeletons in the Necropolis or one of the jewel-eyed skulls in its many niches; he snaps at Emmrich about Nevarran obsession and respecting Rook as Antivan.

Emmrich refuses to budge. She expected the Crows to do nothing for her. She deserves better, deserves to be remembered, even if she isn't Nevarran.

Lucanis seems fully stunned by the idea that Rook believed this in the first place, given Viago's attachment. Given Lucanis's own growing feelings. Emmrich does soften a little bit when he sees that Lucanis truly didn't realize, but he also doesn't fully divert his plans.

Gathering a grave-dowry is normally left to a lover or family member if the deceased was themselves unable, and Emmrich is neither. But needs must, and though his friend now seems attached to Neve and Lucanis, hearts can be fickle. A plan is better. So he puts away small things here or there, eyes which of Rook's enchanted rings and amulets she seems to favor just in case.

It almost helps him live with the knowledge that Arsinoë believed she would die unmourned. Almost.

the fact that we only have “herculean task” and “sisyphean task” feels so limiting. so here’s a few more tasks for your repertoire

icarian task: when you have a task you know you’re going to fail at anyways, so why not have some fun with it before it all comes crashing down

cassandrean task: when you have to deal with people you KNOW won’t listen to you, despite having accurate information, and having to watch them fumble about when you told them the solution from the start (most often witnessed in customer service)

feel free to chime in i ran out of ideas much faster than i anticipated

The movie Wicked is proof that any source material can be vastly improved by simply making the intense female friendship much gayer + the mutual male love interest both wildly bisexual and lowkey down to just be their third

Something I love about M!iK and don't really see be often talked about is the morals of the story.

Shonen stories usually have to work under the same story restrictions of "power of friendship" and "we can accomplish anything by never giving up!", and while MIK certainly has that, I adore the way they twist it.

Yes, both tropes are present but taken to their absolute extreme. Power of friendship? Ok, here's a huge cast of characters who are all in some level Extremely Possesive of eachother. Never give up on your dreams? Alright, the cast are literal demons who feed on desire.

And the best part is that this is openly encouraged by the story. The story is saying "Yes, be selfish! Chase what or who you want without any shame! Take what you love and guard it ferociously because it's YOURS and no one is allowed to harm it."

Iruma's character growth is not connected to "how much more powerful can he get?" Or "how much better of a person can he be?". He's already powerful and he's already a deeply good kid. His growth is explicitly about how much more demonic he can be.

How much more tightly can he hold onto his loved ones and his desires.

How much more selfish.

Just how refresing is it to read a story where gluttony is a virtue and a goal?

so every one in class 1A tired to say something nice to midoriya (largely failed. horribly. but moving on...) while bakugo said this;

bakugo compares midoriya to himself; he feels like they are now on the same wavelength because midoriya finally has power and is no longer the little quirkless nerd he has known all his life. (let's put aside for one moment that midoriya is infinitely stronger than bakugo and strength-wise they are nowhere near on the same level, like bakugo wants to delude himself they are.)

in bakugo's mind, you seemingly can't be powerful without being as insufferable, as crude and cruel, as narcissistic as him; you can't be powerful and not view every one else as simply an extra (or worse than an extra - the space midoriya used to occupy: quirkless and useless). and this may be as close as bakugo will ever get to admitting what he has done to midoriya, the tormet he has put him through. the closest he will ever come to a warped apology, that can never be considered as an apology.

maybe this is why, in the last chapter, he said that "when it comes to deku, i know him best" - it was about strength and power only. because clearly bakugo doesn't know anything about midoriya on an emotional level. he only sees midoriya - only sees people in general - in terms of their quirks, their power, and nothing else. nothing else could possibly matter about a person, where bakugo is concerned - that's why he can look at midoriya, a boy so fundamentally different from him, and see something akin to a mirror image of himself. (again: even speaking just in terms of power (everything else about them as people aside) this is deluded.)

this is also what creates confusion on the part of a reader because- really? how can you compare to you the boy you've abused basically all his life; the one who, despite you being his tormenter, jumped into a situation where he could have been killed all to try and save you, even though you told him to go jump off the roof and hope he gets reincarnated with a quirk barely a few hours before; who is literally sacrificing his happiness, his mind and sanity and even his fucking body, in continuous attempts to save and protect everybody he crosses paths with? who had so little in his miserable life - made miserable largely by you - in terms of human connection and kindness, who only recently has been able to receive all he probably never even dreamed to hope for.. and still! decided to let all he felt so blessed for go. selflessly. and no matter how much it must have broken his heart. feeling so grateful for the blessing he was allowed to hold, the light he was allowed to bask in for the less than a year that he spent at UA, that he decided to sacrifice all of it again and leave it all behind, just in hopes of being able to protect it all. oh my fucking god. midoriya, i am so sorry an ugly ass bastard like this dared to compare you to him. oh my god.

spoiler ahead :P 

Some more telanovela Rookanis ideas but now I'm thinking about Caterina who's made her peace with Rook staying in Lucanis life but still wants him to have a proper wife especially since its not like Lucanis or Rook have made any sort indication that they plan to get married anytime soon so it shouldn't be much of an issue to arrange a marriage for Lucanis while Rook stays as his mistress.

It's not like Caterina hasn't tried to arrange something for Lucanis before because she's been wanting great grandbabies to carry on the Dellamorte name for years but Lucanis simply never seemed interested. Now that Lucanis is with someone Caterina thinks there may be a chance for her to get him engaged to someone suitable for his station.

So Caterina starts reaching out to allied Houses and even some merchant princes to arrange something. Suddenly Villa Dellamorte is getting visits from different well bred girls to try their luck in catching the eye of the First Talon. It doesn't work at all. Lucanis politely refuses all their advances without even properly acknowledging their suits and even takes to making grand and public gestures of affection towards Rook in hopes of deterring them and assuring Rook that his heart still lies with her.

Rook knows Lucanis loves her and only her, has no worries about their relationship, and knows this all has to be Caterina's doing. Still, Rook is actually pretty jealous and possessive and absoutley seething about this disrecpt to her, Lucanis, and their relationship. Rook manages to keep her cool about the sitation and let Lucanis handle the situation however he sees fit but snaps when one of Lucanis' suitors says some dumb shit about not minding Rook staying around as the mistress.

There's this banter between Neve and Emmrich about a charm seller in Tevinter that is scamming people with fake magical charms. Emmrich is appalled by the danger it represents to the public and suddenly the guy is seeing and hearing things and essentially just being haunted to hell and back. Well, pretty much anyone that comes around attempting to woo Lucanis goes home suffering many of the same symptoms. Seeing things out of the corner of their eye, voices whispering and laughing about their worst secrets and insecurities, their nights filled with unending nightmares.

Anyone tries to ask Rook about the sudden uptick in hauntings and Rook plays dumb. Comes up with some vapid excuse full of jargon that any actual necromancer would spot immediately and acts so concerned about the issue but she doesn’t crack and it’s a little scary just how well Rook is able to lie to everyone’s faces because if it weren’t incredibly obvious that Rook had to be the one behind the hauntings, they’d probably believe her. Teia resolves to never get on Rook’s bad side and Viago is pondering how best to create a hallucinogenic to simulate the effects because the way Rook has crippled whole Houses with fear is inspiring. Illario is suddenly doing a whole lot to try to to get into Rook’s good books and Rook is so off put by his behavior that’s she tells him to please stop and go back to being the bitch he is, she honestly likes him better that way.

Lucanis skirts around the issue with Rook and continues to try to assure her that he loves her and only her to which Rook responds that she knows and loves him too but that doesn’t mean she’s willing to sit idly by while people disrespect the depths of their love for each other which is about as close as to a confession Rook gives. Spite asks Rook about it too on a late night after Lucanis has gone to bed and Rook’s response to him is basically “yeah” and Spite lets out the most gleeful cackle Rook’s ever heard because he is delighted by her spiteful vengeance.

The hauntings start to taper off once Lucanis’ suitors stop coming around and the girl that started all this even came to Rook to beg her to make it all stop. Rook, still pretty pissed about her comments, continued to play dumb and essentially gaslit her the whole conversation but did stop the haunting a few days later because she’s not a monster and did feel a little bad the whole situation.

In the end Caterina’s scheme backfired horribly on her as it damaged her relationship with many of the houses she reached out for and strengthened Rook’s own position in the Crows because before she was generally seen as charming, affable, a little creepy due to the whole necromancer thing, and a bit foolish due to Rook’s willingness to make herself the butt of a joke but no one really took her seriously due to mismatch of her personality and reputation as a god killer so most of the Houses assumed her feats were exaggerated, now everyone is kinda terrified of Rook and what she can do. Whereas before people might have yielded to the former First Talon when she called in a favor, now they have to consider whether it would be worth it to cross scary necromancer Rook to do so. Rook basically ends up with a reputation amongst the Crows intimidating enough to match with the Demon of Vyrantium.

During and after this Rook probably gets a few letters from the Necropolis mostly from Emmrich, Myrna, and Vorgoth as they definitely heard about the uptick in hauntings in Antiva and every single one of those letter essentially amounted to asking Rook “really?” to which Rook replied “yes and I feel perfectly justified in doing so” but in more words and without ever outright admitting to her actions.

It’s also after all this that Lucanis officially asks Rook to marry him, something they had been holding off on because they wanted to spend some time finding their footing in their relationship before jumping into the craziness of planning a wedding. Lucanis doesn’t want anyone thinking he isn’t serious about Rook after everything that just happened and Rook gets her chance for revenge against Caterina because now she’s going to have to contend with Vorgoth in the wedding planning process. Vorgoth has been putting together a binder of all their wedding ideas for Rook for years and is very excited to finally be able to execute them.