For Those Of You With Anxiety

Voldy: TELL ME WHERE THE ORDER IS! IF YOU DARE LIE SO HELP ME I WILL MURDER YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY Sirius *thinking about how reg is dead, andromeda was previously disowned and therefore so is her family line, Narcissa is already married to Lucius and Bella has gone mad*:yeah yk mate i think they're at mcdonalds

sorry for thinking it’s hot when men are experiencing the worst torment of their life. as if it’s my fault

I need this man to kiss me like that. I need him to suck the soul out of me. (and a shit ton of other things that I cannot explain here because that would be very R18 and some of yall are minors.)

“I’ll just rest my eyes” is the biggest lie you’re going straight to snorkmimimi land

soooo today i learned that back in the early 90s, coca cola tried making this thing called “ok soda” as a marketing stunt to beat out pepsi since they had way more of a hold on the “younger/rebellious” generation at the time, and their way of doing that was naming it “ok soda” so that they could copyright the word “ok”, the most popular word in the world, and at the same time brand it as an…ironic soda??? like the whole thing with it was that they tried to brand ok soda as a counterculture soda but instead of making it about typical 90s RADICAL EXTREME!!! fodder the theme of it was uh. unsettling capitalist brutalist dystopia. instead of being bright and colorful the color scheme was only stark whites, grays and reds and the cans looked like this. bold shapes and labels stating ominous, robotic things with a figure always staring dead into you on the front, no coca cola branding on it at all.

sometimes there would be “prize cans” of this stuff where instead of having soda inside it there would be hats. and they didn’t sell this option in boxes by the way they just put prize cans in random vending machines. and put like 25 cents in it so hey. you could get an actual soda that isn’t just hats. maybe.

did i mention that this soda also had a fucking MANIFESTO??? because yeah it sure had that printed on some cans and it goes as follows

and there’s these things called “coincidences”, which… yeah it doesn’t make it sound any less ominous

and you might be wondering how the soda itself tastes like does it taste good? ok? well apparently it was just a regular “citric” tasting soda but somehow they fucked it up so bad that it was compared to “carbonated tree sap”, and instead of trying to make the drink taste better they included that it tasted like shit, INTO THE ADVERTISING SCHEME ITSELF. they would literally advertise that it tasted like ass as a part of the ironic marketing, no i am not kidding.

but if you thought that’s where it ended there’s one more curveball and without any exaggeration, you will not expect what i am about to tell you.

take a look at this guy.

this guy is the “face” of ok soda, as in he was printed on the most cans and technically served as a mascot of sorts for the entire thing. his face was a major part of the branding, and this design for the cans was one of if not the most common.

okay. cool. no issue there right?

take a guess on who this guy is based off of.

the artist’s coworker? a generic guy? the artist himself? a relative? some random reference model they hired?

CHARLES MANSON. YES, THIS IS REAL. MEANING FOR A BRIEF MOMENT IN TIME, CHARLES MANSON’S FACE WAS USED AS A MEANS TO SELL COCA COLA.

the lead artist himself has even come forward to say this is the case. and now you may be asking wait. how’d he do this? how’d he possibly get away with this, years after the crimes had been committed?

well according to him, it was simple. apparently none of the contracts he signed said anything against putting a mass murderer on the can. so. there’s THAT.

unfortunately or fortunately depending on how you look at it, ok soda never really caught on since *surprise surprise!* teens really don’t want to buy soda that looks like a brutalist art museum, and it never had a wide release so it was only a thing for like two years between 1993 and 1995. but from what i’ve heard there’s still people who are giving this soda a small modern following, collecting all the cans and merchandise and even coming up with stand in recipes for the soda formula itself.

so yeah! that was ok soda.

what the fuck

Always more dramatic writing, at this point it's more of a personnality trait than a funny quirk

It's a constant escalation

hello little disabled people in my phone. do yall have POTS? are you also queer? im wrote up a pretty short survey for yall to take to give some insight into POTS and its effects on queer bitches. ill be posting the anonymous results pretty regularly as i get new information in, so itll be fairly easy to stay updated on the results.

Google Docs

POTS in Transgender Patients

Studying the effects of POTS on natal sex and gender identity. Answers are anonymous.

no pressure to take the survey of course, i just like to conduct research in my spare time. plus im going on hormone replacement therapy and my mom and my fiance are worried about how it would affect my physical health.

theres also the "other" option for yalls assigned sex at birth, but its not for joke answers. be respectful.

bro it is 3 am for me i just woke up and amigops and technoblade on tribe nine???? dream talking about being queer on MAIN??? what is HAPPENING

Dracula voice: I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for my lawyer, his wife, his wife’s girlfriend, his wife’s girlfriend’s fiancé and their extra boyfriends the Cowboy and the doctor and the doctor’s thesis advisor who knows how to kill vampires for some reason!

I just want them to love each other in a very special way that cannon is. I want trobed to be canon