Im Just Imagining The Amazement On The Boy's Faces When They Learn That Humans Can Smell Rain Long Before

Do you think demons crack their joints?

It was a lazy, rainy evening in the Devildom. An oddly calm one. The residents of the House of Lamentation were gathered in the living room, mainly because that's where you were.

Beelzebub and Mammon were snacking and watching Leviathan play his handheld game. Asmodeus was browsing a magazine, Satan was browsing a book, and Lucifer was texting with Barbatos.

Belphegor had been dozing off on your shoulder for a while. It was hard to move under the demon's weight. You had been stuck in the same pose browsing your D.D.D. until he finally shifted, leaning back into the couch. You seized the opportunity to roll your shoulders and take a much needed stretch.

You lifted your arms. It felt great. Crack.

"What was that?" Satan asked, glancing up from his book.

"Beel probably sat on a chip," Mammon said. Levi snorted, too busy to take his eyes off the game but in agreement with Mammon for once.

"It wasn't me." Beelzebub stood up to prove his innocence, revealing no food under him.

"It was me," you said. "Just my back."

"Hon, what?" "Your what?" Asmodeus and Lucifer spoke at the same time, and both gave you a concerned look.

"My back? I just cracked it."

The demons sprung out of their seats like you had just cursed them. Levi's game system fell to the carpet. Since he was already standing, Beelzebub strode over and pulled the back of your shirt up, asking "does it hurt?"

Startled, you pulled the front of your shirt down for modesty. "Woah, hello? Excuse me? Uh, what?"

While everyone gathered to stare at your back, Belphegor was stirred awake. "What's going on?"

He went to lean on your shoulder again, but Mammon swatted him away. "Hey! Can't ya see they're injured?" he growled. Belphegor huffed at him, deciding instead to help hold your shirt up.

"Poor thing!" Asmo cooed. With one hand he grabbed your wrist, and with the other he made a peace sign. "Look at me, how many fingers am I holding up?"

"I'm fine. Everybody just chill." Despite your insistence, the panic had already set in and nobody was listening to you.

Leviathan was shaking. "T-that's not good, right? Humans aren't supposed to make those kind of sounds." He was covering his eyes with his hands squeamishly but peeking through his fingers to stare anyway. "A doctor! Are there any human doctors? Should we call Solomon?"

"Yes, somebody call Solomon," Lucifer commanded. "Where did the crack occur?" He started gently prodding around your spine, making you squirm.

Satan tried to bump Lucifer's hand away from you while placing himself in Lucifer's spot. "Can't you see they don't like that? You're making it worse."

"Deep breaths," Mammon instructed you, breathing deeply in and out. He seemed on the brink of hyperventilation himself.

Lucifer refused to budge, but Satan persisted. He was now also poking you. "The damage isn't visible yet, but there could be internal bleeding. You have to lay down."

Belphegor scooted over to make more room, despite your protest of "I'm not going to move, nothing is wrong."

Asmodeus managed to already get Solomon on the phone. You couldn't hear him over Asmo's worried shrieks but knew he had to be laughing. Solomon was not going to let you forget this incident.

Beel, Lucifer, and Satan moved to try and pick you up but enough was enough. "I said I'm fine!! Everybody stay!"

The seven went crashing to the floor, finally allowing you to cover up. "I am fine! I'm fine! See!" You stood up dramatically and grabbed Asmo's D.D.D. to apologize to a snickering Solomon.

The demons were annoyed and concerned as they tried to pick themselves up. "If you're so fine, then explain that noise," Satan said.

"Humans just do that from time to time."

wake up babe, hua cheng saying "as you wish" in the new tgcf dub episode just dropped

Humans Are Confusing

Alright. First time posting an actual anything on Tumblr, so let's see how this goes. Ran into a post on here recently and haven't been able to get it out of my mind since, so I kinda wanna ramble.

I like to think that in the Obey Me universe, humans and demons are just Built Different when compared to each other. I also like to think that demons don't truly know a lot about humans. They think they do, or that humans are easy to predict/understand. But there are wrong and having Solomon and Mc around just proves it to them.

Again. Humans and demons are built different. I like to think about the possibility of the human body/mind being able to do things a demons body/mind could never and that absolutely snaps the brothers' minds. So I have thought of a few things I could make funny scenarios out of.

Cracking Bones:

Humans crack all sorts of bones and joints all the time. I know I sure do, mainly my back, fingers and neck. Well, so do Solomon and Mc. They both do it all the time, especially Solomon, and neither thought anything of it when they first started staying in the Devildom. Neither knew that demons can't crack their bones.

The first time Mc cracked their back when stretching, every brothers head whipped towards them. Upon seeing that that sound came from Mc, horror settled in. And even more shock occurred when Solomon, who was nearby, said "Nice. Sounded like that felt good." and Mc, who they all expected to suddenly fall to the floor or something, simply straightened themself and said "Yep. Been needing to do that for a while now." and walked out of the room completely fine. No one knew what the hell just happened.

Demons can't do that. That sounded like a bone fucking breaking so how in the Devildom is Mc okay?!?!

Still in a shock, Mc came back in and noticed the brothers' state. They asked Solomon what was up and he had no clue. So they asked. Only Lucifer was able to shake himself our of his stupor enough to ask the question.

And this left Mc and Solomon both very confused. "Can you guys not do that?" and all the brothers frantically shook there heads. With a chuckle, Solomon explained that humans could simply move their bones and joints in a way that resulted in a cracking sound. It was something that actually resulted in relief, in pressure being taken off those points.

Then he promptly stood up and swung his torso, multiple cracking sounds filling the room from his back and then he bent his fingers one by one, each motion resulting in another crack. Then he walked up to Mc and they both left the room, completely fine. Asmo almost passed out that day.

And now all the demons and angels have a short panic whenever Mc or Solomon crack something until they remember that it's apparently normal for them.

The need for socialization:

Demons can and have gone centuries alone. Whether it was self-induced or a punishment, they will be fine in the long run. Hell, even some of the brothers can go a couple months without socializing (Levi and Belphie) and have no problems. Isolation is no life threatening thing for them. But it is for humans.

The brothers never knew what could happen to a human left isolated for too long until Mc and Solomon started talking about is to each other. It was a long conversation about the effects and risks of it.

Humans can develop physical and mental disease and illness from isolation. Heart problems, depression, mental decline, hallucinations, extreme anxiety, increased blood pressure, even insanity.

Why? Could humans not just...be okay? Why would they get all these problems if they isolated for so long? That doesn't happen to demons, or even angels. So, they started asking questions, all of which made Mc and Solomon realize how these topics, which are sort of common knowledge among humans, are very much unknown to the people of the other realms

And so they explained. Explained how humans were built to be social, to depend on each other physically and mentally. While they are capable of surviving alone for a while, or even a whole lifetime, they will still develop problems. Isolation can literally alter the brain chemistry of a human. They brought up the fact that Mc doesn't like to be alone for too long, getting lonely and too far into their own head when they get ignored. The fact that Solomon, who has gone dangerously long without contact, finds the subtle ways to latch himself onto people or goes somewhere with lot of people and lets himself be with them, to feed off their energy and be human again.

Let's just say that, after this conversation, everyone made an effort to no longer ignore Mc or Solomon for too long.

(I may find more of these ideas so stay tuned?)

Solphisto ACTUAL marital divorce arc is the funniest thing. If you have the time could you please draw Solomon as that one shot of Peter B Parker cryinf in the shower 😭

"i miss my wife, spiderkid. i miss him a lot"

i really like the idea of ik and solomon taking a break from the villain-hero i'm-gonna-experiment-on-you thing so that ik can help him with his broken marriage sbfbffbfj

The apprentices and Olruggio when they find out Qifrey is a tree

Physical Human things that freak Demons out

Musings

Humans have more endurance/Stamina and flexibility and general hardiness than either Angels or Demons. Sure Angels and Demons are super fast, super strong and magic, but I think the average human walking could outdistance a demon walking at the same pace. (Humans are pursuit predators after all)

As for hardiness, yeah humans are easy to kill - however, if they don’t die they survive a whole hell of a lot, some of which would actually kill a demon)

IE Humans can survive losing limbs but its basically fatal to demons and angels. Humans can also get their limbs re-attached, but once a Demon or Angel looses a limb, it’s pretty much gone except in the most ideal of circumstances. (Their physiology makes it extremely complex and difficult, magic or otherwise to reattach)

This is mostly going to be about Demon reactions, because I think that Angels have either had enough exposure that they’re chill about it, or they’re able to keep their composure. Luke may be taken aback at first, but after you and Simeon explain that humans can just do that, he thinks it’s cool!

Headcannons for this are the Human introducing Just Dance or something and just winning by default bc no one else can do the moves, even if the MC has limited mobility or strength. Or them doing super mundane things like reaching behind them or twisting their back to look over. I also think Humans have more fluid motion than Angels or Demons bc of the flexibility and also bc we are full of fluid lol. Not necessarily graceful - just fluid. I also think we have a winder range of motion in general, like our joints

This is a continuation of the flexibility thing - Levi may stream occasionally and one time the MC was on the stream (accidentally or invited ect) and they give Levi a thumbs up and the chat and Levi absolutely lose their minds (doubly so for a hitchhikers thumb) because Demons don’t have as wide a range of motion.

MC like twists in their seat to look at Barbatos one day while at the Demon Castle and Diavolo panics inside and almost instinctually casts some healing magic - but MC seems fine? Oh! Interesting, he’d like to learn more.

Satan and MC go on a walk one day and by the end of the walk Satan is astounded at how much stamina humans have. His usual walk (one that tires him out reliably) didn’t have as much of an effect.

This would still happen if the MC needed mobility aids too, and might not happen with walking but would happen with other things. They might be able to work with their hands for longer or something similar.

If the MC is an athlete, I don’t think they would be able to outspeed anybody at all but I do think that them being able to outdistance people is a thing. Like they run with Beel one time and though Beel is way faster, after a few loops or after the route is finished  he’s unable to go any more, but the MC can still run. (I think out of the brothers, Levi and Beel have the most stamina, I also think Levi is the fastest swimmer, and Asmo is the most flexible)

One day Lucifer comes home to MC lying upside -down on the couch, their spine bent backwards, their head close to the ground, and their legs over the back - and he let out the most high pitched shriek MC had ever heard. They were just chilling, stretching a bit, really.

Belphegor loves how flexible MC is and how they’re built. It’s comfy and he can experience cuddles in new ways. Plus it’s fun to see the others freak out when the MC does things, though sometimes he’s…unnerved to say the least.

Asmo delights in watching how MC moves, and not just in a lustful way. He loves to watch you and notice little things about you.

Beel likes to move with you - walking, running, swimming, dancing, even handiwork, he likes to do it with you. Its a way for him to connect with you in a special way, doing physical activity together. (Not just sports and athletics but like, literally anything)

Satan is fascinated by new things, and wants to learn. This means, that he’s fascinated by and wants to learn about you! In any way possible. He thinks the way you move is super fascinating, doubly so because it’s you. He’ll ask you do do certain movements and tricks with your body in order to a) learn more about you (and humans in general, but mostly you) and b) see you move in fun ways. Additionally - this has some potential for the anti-Lucifer League

Levi is honestly in awe of how dexterous you are - even if the mc has limited mobility in their hands, you can still do some things with the buttons on the controller that he just cannot do. (Like, he can do normal videogaming motions, but he can’t do ones humans can that involve stretching their hands out, or curling their fingers to hit some buttons) It fills him with awe, and at first he’s full of envy, but then things change. He’ll watch you playing, and sometimes might ask for help if he’s having trouble with some maneuvers

Mammon straight up uses you as a distraction, but also  it backfires because it distracts him as well. RIP his schemes

Barbatos is thoroughly amused, both in the reactions of others and in the things you do to illicit those reactions,

The key shortcut of "windows key" and "." held together has changed my life

like

emoji access? supremely powerful 🙂💖

But

Kaomoji ?

The year is 2013 and I am unstoppable ヾ(•ω•`)o o(*￣▽￣*)ブo(*°▽°*)o

Can't stop thinking about the brothers calling MC "master" since that new teaser trailer came out. The game is called "One Master to Rule Them All." It's always been called that. This massive potential has been right in front of our eyes the whole time.

Lucifer, who only uses it in private when he's feeling particularly devilish. He wraps his arms around you, looks you right in the eye, and asks, "how does my master feel today, hmm?"

Mammon, who has an empty wallet and the urge to gamble: "Maaaster! Can I borrow some cash? I can, right? I'm your first, after all. I'll just take it from your wallet."

Leviathan, who wants to go to an anime collab cafe but is too anxious to go alone, so he begs you: "Please! Master! It's only open this week and I just have to collect all 24 limited edition cafe coasters! It'll be easier if we go together!"

Satan, who catches you when you stumble and jokingly asks, "are you okay, master?" He likes seeing the little sparks of wrath in your eyes that mirror his own.

Asmodeus, who thinks the word is hot and enjoys your reaction when he comes to steal you away from other people by saying "hey! I need to speak with my master. I'll be borrowing them for a while. I'm sure you don't mind."

Beelzebub, who hungrily stares at the food in the fridge with your name on it. He knows he needs to butter you up to have any chance of success: "Hey master, are you gonna eat that?"

Belphegor, who uses it at the most unexpected times. He texts the group chat, "does anyone know where our master is? I can't find them." It sets off a long chain of messages. "Master's not in their bedroom?" "Master? Haven't seen 'em." "Did you try yelling 'master!' and seeing if they respond?" "I saw master getting something to drink about an hour ago." "Master, are you reading our messages? I know you are." "I can't believe master is ignoring us." Several crying emoji are sent in quick succession.

Solomon and Barbatos, who witness the brothers doing this on occasion. Solomon turns to the latter and says, "You never call me your master. Want to give it a try?"

Barbatos looks at him with barely repressed revulsion. "I only have one master, and that is the Young Master. If you ever make such a joke again I will have you tried in court for lese-majeste."

ITS WISDOM SAGA TIME!!!!!!

BG3 Companion's reactions to Tav being much younger than they thought

Trying out a new format kinda, let me know if it works, please

Lae’zel is the baby at 20/23 ish but for this Tav is around age 16/17 making them the baby 

Astarion: He didn't really care to know your age when you first met, but as you ventured forth he could tell you where inexperienced, an amazing leader, but you had no idea what you were doing. “How long have you been doing this, adventuring this darling?” He asked watching as you tried in vain to unlock a chest. “Oh well… Im only sixteen so not that long? When we met up really.” He stared into space for a moment, taking in his fearless leader, who was in fact a child. “Well thats… reassuring?” He said carefully moving you to the side so he could pick the lock for you. 

Trust me you wouldn't live down the. “Does the baby need help?” Jokes

No one is getting within arm's length of you though

#his baby *cough* his meal ticket *cough, cough*

Gale: The poor guy has a lot on his mind *and in it*. Forgive him that he really didn't think about figuring out how old you are. “Gale how old were you when you found out you could use magic?” Gale looked up at you watching you playing around with Minor Illusion. “I was about seventeen when Mystra first contacted me.” He said thinking for a moment. “Ohhh that means I’ll be a better wizard than you!” He chuckled hearing You tease him. “You can't be that young.” He jested, his face deadpanning when you admitted you were almost seventeen. 

Giving him PTSD from when he first met Mystra

He feeds you first 

Feels so guilty about you going to get him magical artifacts

Halsin:  Oh he knew, He is over three hundred but he ain't dumb. When you broke him out of Jail he was protective of you, seeing a kid leading and protecting a group of adults broke his heart. “Tav, please rest.” He said softly as he let you sit down. “I have the watch tonight, please get some sleep.” He’s a papa bear. You get hurt, he's there. Can't reach something? Halsins is helping lift you up. He lets you have your respect as a leader but he is always there to be a shoulder to lean on or your own personal Jiminy cricket. 

Guard Dog privileges

Will let you sleep on him

Will not let you in the sheresses caress

Jaheira: Mama knew, when you first pulled up to Last Light she swore she saw one of her kids running up to her. “Cub have you eaten?” She’s already going mama mode seeing you haven't slept or eaten. She tears Halsin a new one for not helping you more with Art Cullagh. After the Last Light is attacked and you are standing by her side helping protect her people she feels proud of the next generation and those who are leading it.

She licks her thumb and cleans your face without thinking of it

Teaches you how to haggle

Feels so sorry for you and the trials you must face

Karlach: The baby girl had no idea, she just knows it's fun to rage with you. During a particularly deep rage section, she was surprised when you started to cry. “Soldier?” She asks having to stop herself from hugging and burning you. “I-I’m just scared Karlach.” She listened to you feeling her own tears forming. “I’m not even eighteen, but… Everyone depends on me.” Gods she wanted to hug you, she was raging for you, and because she couldn't hug you. 

She works 10x harder to cool down her heart, not just for her, but so she can hold you

Lets you hug Clive as long as you need

Knows how you feel from being shoved into Zariel’s arms at age fifteen

Lae’zel: She doesn't care, You are old enough to hold a sword. In fact your young age and leadership skills just makes her impressed. “I will help train you to fight like a true warrior, not like the teeth-ling.” She does in fact start training you. Dear gods save you, shes got you running laps before the sun comes up.

Proud older sister

Has her own special *violent* way for praising you

Talks about when shes a general of Vlakith and you will be her right-hand

Shadowheart: She and Lae’zel were at each other's throats again when you blew up at them. “You two are fighting like teenagers! And I’m sixteen!” She felt like she got hit by a bag of bricks, you were sixteen, but you had pulled her from the nautiloid, and fought with her out of the hells. “You can't be sixteen.” She said chuckling softly in disbelief, hearing you confirm when you were born she definitely needed some wine to get over that.

Don't know how to act around you

Will give you little candies

Mom said I have to take you with me vibes

Wyll: He found out talking about his pact with you. “Yes, I was seventeen when I signed my pact, but I do not regret it.” He said taking a drink from his goblet. “Man I'm almost seventeen, I wonder what I’ll be like when I'm your age.” Have you ever seen someone shoot wine out their nose? Now you have.

Gets very protective when Mizora shows up

Big brother mode

Piggy back rides when you are tired