Poolverine Is Actually Hilarious If You Think About It. Take Wolverine, The Man Who Is Used As A Weapon

“why do you ship them? I thought the ship wasn’t canon?” bro we’re talking about fictional characters, who don’t actually exist in real life, from a media that focuses solely on fictional events that are not real either. so what if these two made-up characters didn’t kiss in their source material? they have lots of nasty gay sex on archive of our own and thousands of novel length slow burn enemies to lovers fics written about them. the fanon content at this point far exceeds the whole canonical franchise. the problem isn’t “it’s not canon” the problem is that you don’t allow yourself to let go of canon and enjoy the wonder of fan contents that are just as good / valid

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Can I have a smutty dictionary? Or a list of smutty words?

Sure! Now, this is definitely incomplete; these are the ones I use most often. If you have any to add, please do!

“The Smut Writer’s Dictionary”

Arousal/Anticipation

hot

warm

burn

ache

heat

swell

red/pink flush

roil

dizzy

foggy

rush of [heat, for example]

heavy

heady

intoxicating

thick [air/atmosphere]

thrum

ignite

desire

pulse quickened

tempt

tantalizing

throb

excite

prickle

tingle

turn on

What People Look Like

disheveled

blissed out

eyes glazed over

eyes rolled back in head

flushed

sweaty

glistening

mouth open

eyes closed

General Movement

clutch

crawl

slap

swat

smack

nuzzle

fidget

squirm

fast

slow

lift

fold

embrace

melt into/against

bend

shove

wiggle

wriggle

tuck

glide

clenching/unclenching

General Touching

caress

graze

brush

stimulate

flick

massage

skim

drag

shiver

goosebumps

flutter

grope

fondle

pet

pleasure [as in: pleasured himself]

nudge

stroke

feather-light

tease

probe

wander

knead

capture

grip

Kissing/Rimming

suck

bite 

nibble

lick

slide

wet

flick tongue at/against

bite

bury [his face] in

ravish

dip [tongue into]

weave lips together

capture [his] lips

press a kiss against

drop a kiss to [body part]

Noises

grunt

growl

moan

groan

sigh

breath hitching

gasp

sharp intake of breath

exhale

cry

keen

whimper

whine

hoarse

ragged

garbled

strangled

croak

shout

Verbs for Speaking

breathe

whisper

sigh

gasp

groan

moan

grunt

growl

order

snap

spat

cry

murmur

mumble

beg

whimper

whine

croak

Preparation

finger

open [himself] up

work [himself] open

pump [fingers/toy] in and out

spread

shove

slick/slicken

lubed [himself] up

Blow Job

lick

suck

envelop

wet

mouth at [something]

slobber

dripping

flick tongue at/against

blow

drool

Hand Job/Masturbation

pump

twist

squeeze

rub

fondle

cup

stroke

palm

tap

grip

Dry Humping

grind

rub

rock

hump

roll hips together/against

Fucking

push in

press in/against

slide in

breach

pop in

bury [himself] in/into/inside

in to the hilt

penetrate

sink down on

split open

tight

fill

roll

thrust

drive

pound

rock

bounce

buck

slam

meld

frantic

fuse

pace [fast or slow, for example]

clench

grind

Orgasm/Words for Feeling Pleasure

come/cum

climax

peak

topple over

fall over

tumble over

let go

spill

contract

convulse

writhe

quiver

shiver

shudder

shoot

tremble

ejaculate

pulse

pulsate

twitch

arch [his back]

blissed out

spasm

burst

reeling

throb

tremor

ecstasy

swallow

shockwaves

release

spurt

jerk

Taste

tangy

sweet

bitter

salty

Smell

musky

heady

intoxicating

tangy

sweet

Cooldown/Cleanup

sticky

sweaty

glistening

chest heaving

wipe

dab

wash

spent

soften

flagged [as in: his cock flagged]

fulfilled

satisfied

left reeling

cuddle

snuggle

plaster [as in: plastered themselves together OR plastered to each other’s side]

flop around

boneless

limp

Words to Describe Cock

cock

dick

shaft

tip

ridge

hard

firm

glisten

thick

length

red

flushed

engorged

throbbing

quivering

twitching

Words to Describe Feelings/Touches/Movements/Sensations

gentle

soft

rough

hard

fervid 

feverish

fervor

passionate

vulnerable

exposed

sensual

silky

fleeting

prickle

tingle

tender

warm

electric

spark

Misc. Smutty Words and Phrases

with abandon

need

want

overcome

erupt in [goosebumps, for example]

pliant

viscous

erotic

long for

yearn

yield

urge

bloom [as in: color bloomed across his cheeks]

intimate

relax

vigorous

thrill

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”you can just make an oc” you dont understand anything. the character needs to mutate naturally until unrecognizable. like all evolutionary processes it takes time. you can’t force it or it doesn’t take. you must endure weird ooc thematically discordant versions of a guy until they bud off into beautiful new life. have patience

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"I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy" nah fuck that I would. Actually if I could choose to have any superpower, I'd want the power to make people feel whatever I've felt at any point of my life, at my choice. Someone mildly inconveniences me, I'm letting them have 30 minutes of being five years old and trying to learn how to cry silently because you know nobody's coming to help you and if someone hears you, they're coming to make it worse. Fuck you and your eyebrows.

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"i'm gonna love you despite you" oh my GODDDDD SUCK HIS DICK ALREADY

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I need a day between every day to recover from the day before

Sir, that’s my emotional support unrealistic romantic delusion

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not now kitten, daddy has to write strange self indulgent fan fiction.

Can I just say this weird social media push of "girl cat boy cat" pisses me off there was this girl i overheard who was petting a cat who was showing her a lot of love and talking about adopting her but when she found out she was a girl cat she was like "I don't like girl cats" like what the fuck are we doing misogyny against cats now

what if I just started UNDERthinking things

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