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Democrats: alright we finally did it, Trumps been impeached. Time for a trial in the-

Republicans: lol yeah about that trial. It’s not gonna be fair or anything, we’ve already made up our minds and there’s gonna be like, 0 witnesses

Democrats: oh? Ok then. If that’s the case then I guess we’ll just hold on to these *pockets articles of impeachment*

Republicans:

V.E. Schwab’s advice on creating memorable characters.

Between Zoom birthday parties and three-hour House Party hangs, people are finding new ways to stay connected with their loved ones while practicing safe physical distancing. Tumblr Creatr Jennifer Xiao (@jxiaoo) has a few new ideas for friends to stay #TogetherWithYou if you’re feeling particularly adventurous. 

I’m crying

the sexual tension between two racists on national television is really extreme in this white house today

by sad_yeehaw

“I have an announcement to make,” Tony said, getting up from his chair and shushing everyone around him. He was situated at one head of the table, and some of the avengers noticed the empty spot to his left, but didn’t question it. “Tonight is a very special Avengers Family Dinner™, since we have a new member joining us. Underoos, please come out of wherever you’re hiding, please.”

When Mr. Stark finished his sentence, Peter did a backflip off the ceiling where he was hiding, and landed behind Tony, making a few people jump. His mentor smiled and stepped to the side, pushing the teenager in front for everybody to see.

He was a bit intimidated by the amount of eyes on him, but he still needed to introduce himself. He swallowed hard and started talking.

“Um… Hi, everyone. I’m Peter Parker, but you might know me as Spider-man.”

or

peter is invited to the avengers family dinner, which is pretty eventful, to say the least.

Words: 790, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of the spiderling meets the rest of the team

Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M, Multi

Characters: Peter Parker, May Parker (Spider-Man), Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, James “Bucky” Barnes, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, Thor (Marvel), Wanda Maximoff, Loki (Marvel), Shuri (Marvel), T'Challa (Marvel), Vision (Marvel), Sam Wilson (Marvel), Scott Lang, Hope Van Dyne, James “Rhodey” Rhodes

Relationships: James “Bucky” Barnes/Steve Rogers, Bruce Banner/Thor, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Steve Rogers, James “Bucky” Barnes & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Natasha Romanov, Peter Parker & Thor, Loki & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Shuri, Bruce Banner & Peter Parker, Clint Barton & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Vision, Wanda Maximoff & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Sam Wilson, Peter Parker & Pepper Potts, May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker, Scott Lang & Peter Parker, Scott Lang/Hope Van Dyne, Peter Parker & Hope Van Dyne, Peter Parker & T'Challa, Peter Parker & James “Rhodey” Rhodes

Additional Tags: woah that was too many relationships and characters, that took me a while, whatever, okay, this is the first fanfic i have written since 2015, when i wrote shit on wattpad, Hopefully it isn’t too bad, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker’s Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Parent Tony Stark, morgan doesn’t exist bc i can’t write small children, I’m Sorry, Precious Peter Parker, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, BAMF Natasha Romanov, BAMF Peter Parker, BAMF Bucky Barnes, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Spider-Man: Far From Home Compliant, i can’t tag, How Do I Tag, this is gonna be bad oof, tony nat and loki are alive because i said so

D:

you ever see a post that just fucks you up a little?

OH MY GOD

Can you hear me sobbing

Tony: *rollerblading into Stephen’s office wearing sunglasses and holding a pina colada* Stephen you’re not gonna fucking believe this!

As an American I can in fact say that America does not exist

it is literally almost 2am and im sitting here being scared of the united states like what the fuck there are so many people there!!!!! and they're all just speaking with their american accent like hello??? how do you not just laugh all the time. americans wake up and go to their american jobs and american schools that's so fucking weird. i imagine it as a fake place because it's where everywhere on tv is.

AH MY SON

GAMER SHIGARAKI GAMER SHIGARAKI AKSHKJASGKDJHGA