Really Enjoying All The Videos Muslims Have Been Posting Of Their Cats Looking Like This

this ups the ante quite a bit. a change in perspective

What are your biggest pet peeves in fics

My biggest pet peeve is, hands down, fandom’s portrayal of the first war, which is almost never portrayed as violent and terrible as the details we get about it in canon. Most importantly:

The First War started in 1970.

Not 1975 or 1976. Certainly not 1978. 1970. This means the war was raging the entire time the Marauders were at Hogwarts, and that they entered Hogwarts a year into the war. It lasted 11 whole years. The whole point is that the First War was much worse than the Second War.

I’ve seen people say things like “The Marauders era is boring because nothing really happens until their later years until the war starts and/or heats up” and say it like it’s complete fact and not something fans completely made up. The idea that the war only “heats up” after Snape’s Worst Memory is so universally accepted despite all evidence to the contrary.

(I’ve also seen claims that the only murders/war crimes committed during the first war were the few explicitly named in the text, which is, again… truly embarrassing analysis.)

The reason fandom has come up with this narrative is entirely to fit the Snape vs. Marauders “bullying” angle. It usually goes like this: Sirius and James were bullies for 5 years, until - conveniently and magically - the war started to “heat up” and get more serious 6th year or sometimes 7th year and therefore they matured (especially James, though the idea of Sirius maturing after the Prank is also common in fic). It provides a neat little coming of age arc for the Marauders, one that does not actually exist in canon.

Because, believe it or not, Voldemort was not going to adjust the trajectory of his war to fit this narrative.

On the pro-Marauders side who still see them as bullies, the fandom can’t reconcile the idea of the war being serious and the Marauders not being serious about it and instead spending their time bullying others. But the war was already heated up, and the Marauders were already serious about the war by SWM - because the Marauders attacks on Snape and others was them being serious about the war, because it wasn’t bullying, it was vigilante justice.

On the Snape fan side, to portray Snape as a victim of bullying, they have to pretend that he's the only person capable of being victimized in the whole entire wizarding world, and people actually being murdered and tortured conflicts with that narrative.

I can buy that the war took a few years to heat up, I doubt it went to daily murders and tortures immediately, but I think a war would not take 6-7 years to escalate. I would guess it heated up sometime the Marauders 2nd year or 3rd year, at latest.

(I often see so many Order deaths happening in late war, per Moody, used at evidence that the war only escalated then, but the Order is tiny and doesn’t represent the casualties in the rest of the population)

Evidence towards the fact that the war was very heated up already by the time of SWM is that Lily calls Voldemort “You Know Who” in her conversation with Snape outside the Gryffindor common room - which means that by that time Voldemort has spread enough terror that people are afraid to say his name.

Also, remember this is already a very violent society. The fact that some pureblood families murder Muggles for fun (Muggle hunting) is apparently an open secret, they murder house elves, and I’ve said before that I think pureblood society practices honor killings which are at least somewhat legally sanctioned (i.e. Merope’s situation).

So a few occasional murders is not going to shake them and is not what this society is going to consider a war.

More evidence is how much the violence has escalated at Hogwarts. Death Eater students are regularly and openly torturing students with Dark Magic "for a laugh" and not being expelled, which is something that doesn't even happen in canon era - the closest we get is Draco cursing Katie Bell by accident, during a specific secret mission, and unlike with Mulciber and Mary Macdonald, no one knows who the culprit even is, so they don’t have the option to expel him. Similarly we have Snape using Sectumsempra so often at Hogwarts that it became known as his specialty and not being expelled, despite it being a near-fatal torture curse.

This fic captures what the atmosphere at Hogwarts would’ve been like really well:

"Did that kind of thing happen a lot in Hogwarts?" Hermione asked, tone oddly flat. "In the seventies?"

“Yes," Sirius said after a long moment. "It did. There were times when it was pretty much open warfare in the halls and on the grounds, between the students everyone knew were on Voldemort's side and the ones who opposed him, or whose families did... I was talking to Pomfrey about it the other day, she says you lot get yourself hexed as often in a few months as our generation used to in a week. And people attacked pets or destroyed belongings all the time. It was one reason a lot of students hid being muggleborn."

There’s the inability to extrapolate from canon details, fandom often portraying the First War like it’s just 30 Death Eaters on one side and 20 Order members on the other.

For example, if a mere ~30 Death Eaters are already committing daily murders in HBP during the Second War, how much violence do you think an army of ~500+ DEs (Sirius says the DEs that came back in GoF is literally nothing to how large Voldemort’s armies were in the First War; Remus says the Order was outnumbered 20 to 1) was committing? Similarly, based on the statistics given in HBP (by February Ron says he’s literally lost count of how many students have lost relatives), by SWM a substantial amount of the student body would’ve had families murdered by Death Eaters (and therefore the students cheering James and Sirius on in SWM is obviously because they hate Snape for being a proto-Death Eater and not for being poor 🙄). There may have even been students themselves that were killed over breaks.

This lines up with Sirius's description of the war:

“You’re scared for yourself, and your family, and your friends. Every week, news comes of more deaths, more disappearances, more torturing... the Ministry of Magic’s in disarray, they don’t know what to do, they’re trying to keep everything hidden from the Muggles, but meanwhile, Muggles are dying too. Terror everywhere... panic... confusion... that’s how it used to be."

There are lots of similar passages about the war, I’m not going to quote all of them, but I suggest people actually pay attention to those details, as well as stuff during the Second War that would apply to the first.

The same thing applies as fandom portraying teenage Death Eaters as only joining once they graduate, when canon indicates they would be Marked at 16, but that’s for another meta.

It’s Mother’s Day coming up, so I’m thinking of all the women in my life and all the awesome roles they play (mothers, non-mothers, and never-mothers alike).

http://everythingisgoingtobeokcomic.com/well-behaved-women

Hi! First off. I love your blog and how you write about James and Sirius they are✨everything✨

But, I was wondering what your views and opinions are on each of their individual relationships with Remus and Peter.

Firstly thank you! It’s my mission to put more j/s out into the world so I’m glad my particular brand of it resonates with other enjoyers <3 I love this question but unfortunately various deadlines and then me just being a messy, inconcise writer have delayed it to the two months mark 💀 so hopefully you’re still interested & it was worth the wait! I’ve edited it to death and it’s still this long so buckle in & multiple apologies 

~

The little that we do know of James and Remus’ friendship gives the impression of a really genuine, nurturing, trusting one, and helps to bridge that gap between the arrogant bully we see in SWM and the good guy Sirius and Remus tell us that James becomes later. James supported Remus financially post-Hogwarts, became an Animagus for him, and then there’s the “furry little problem” comment that Remus bursts out laughing at and looks “slightly more cheerful” at the memory of. 

I think that one line says a lot about James and Remus and establishes a shared sense of humour. It’s a very “raised by older parents” thing of James to say, it’s weirdly gentle and tactful from someone who doesn’t show that in any of the memories we see of him but it’s also quite light and optimistic about Remus’ “little problem” as something they can solve together. James, like Remus, probably spent a lot of his childhood with his parents so I think they’d both have had quiet evenings in by the Wireless with biscuits and hot chocolate before bed and homemade jumpers and grandad slippers so despite James being very loud and Remus not knowing how to really interact with other kids despite wanting to, they would ‘get’ each other on a home life level that would bridge the difference in wealth and with the werewolf thing.

I think that James makes Remus feel more normal and his brand of carefree, casual, cocksure acceptance would make him Remus’ main source of support in terms of friends. The time that Remus knows James (meeting him in first year to James’ death) directly correlates with the happiest, most stable time in his life. When James dies he has lost all of his friends and James’ financial support so James is a literal stabilising force in his life, so James would have been Remus’ go-to when he wanted to talk serious werewolf stuff. I see James plopping down next to Remus on his bed being like “talk to me, I’m listening” and Remus finding it easy to open up that way. They’d be familiar enough to have little in-jokes that are just the two of them whereas I think Remus and Sirius wouldn’t have that closeness. (Not a j/s post but I also like to think of Remus just giving James this wry eye-contact re:Sirius like ‘lol u got it bad’ and James being all ???!!! back at him).

OTOH I see Sirius and Remus’ friendship as more distant and a friendship of two halves. On the one hand there’s a consistent mutual respect.  Remus includes Sirius in his praise of him - “your father and Sirius were the best in the school at whatever they did” - and Sirius evidently regards Remus more highly than Peter because he engages and jokes with him in SWM which shows a shared sense of humour. I think Sirius would respect Remus’ magical abilities as being close to his and James’ in the same way that he doesn’t respect Peter for his lack of relative magical ability. I think a lot of their discussions would about wizarding politics and the technical possibilities of magic so they’d probably get on quite well with the Marauder’s Map project (but also lol at Sirius being like “Remus, just let me do it, I know what I’m doing and I’m quicker” and taking over and Remus going all mutinous). However, Sirius also rebuffs Remus’ attempts to engage in SWM, showing an element of impatience and a sense of tension, instability and misunderstanding to their friendship (more on this in a separate post bc this one is Long).

A big thing for me that inhibits me from reading Sirius and Remus as particularly close is the mutual distrust and suspicion of the other as a traitor. I have always thought that this was a gradual thing that built up over years. To suspect a friend of ten years of being a spy is huge so I think the prank intensified and maybe accelerated it but it wasn’t the origin of the breakdown in trust. Notably it was a spy in the Order, not a spy just out of the Marauders, yet both Sirius and Remus suspected each other out of everyone else. I think that the tension would be unspoken but mutually felt and it would come from fundamental differences like their different backgrounds, and on Remus’ end a resentment of Sirius’ freedom to be reckless and impulsive and get nothing more than a detention for it when Remus being reckless could lead to dangerous consequnces (even though that didn’t really stop him being reckless on several occasions). 

I also feel like Sirius would have a more clinical, less tactful, though still very supportive, approach to Remus’ lycanthropy and he’d discuss werewolf issues from an intellectual/social/political perspective rather than really engaging with Remus’ experience (at least until he actually sees him transform) which might seem dismissive to Remus. I also think that Remus would question Sirius’ support because of the Black family’s reputation, enough so that when the prank happens that background suspicion would be vindicated. It’s said a lot that Sirius would never have sent Snape to the Shack if it was James who were the werewolf, and that’s an important distinction between James and Sirius’ close relationship & Sirius and Remus’ more neutral and separated friendship.

At the same time there must be genuine friendship there somewhere because they reunite very easily in the Shrieking Shack, hugging like brothers and calling each other “old friend” and they sense/assume capability to kill Peter and the desire for revenge in each other which suggests that they know each other well. I do think that a lot of that comes from the adrenaline of the situation, and that the combination of relief, familiarity, nostalgia, revenge, desperation, grief, etc, would heighten that joy at being reunited. I think that they experience those emotions alongside each other rather than because of each other, routed through James and their experience of knowing and losing him rather than an especial attachment to each other specifically, though. Their joint venture of avenging James positions him as a central touchstone in their friendship. When Harry goes to them for reassurance after SWM, they’re both just remembering James and Sirius’ acknowledgement of Remus is all about separating him from himself and James. The main thing they have in common is James, imo. The discovery of Peter as the traitor removes the main internal conflict of their friendship, as well as external conflicts (i.e. impending war, Harry’s chaotic life) superceding any personality differences or annoyances. 

Convenience also plays a big part in their post-PoA friendship. They’re a mutually beneficial, easily accessible source of familiarity and nostalgia for each other, a parallel reminder of James and their youth when they were both happier. Things like “lie low at Lupin’s” and Remus living at Grimmauld Place are measures of convenience rather than closeness when scrutinised. Grimmauld Place is Order HQ and Remus is single and unemployed, obviously he’s going to choose to be around people and have free food and shelter (plus Tonks is there a lot). Before that Sirius that lives in a cave eating rats even though he probably could live with Remus because at this point it’s not widely known that he’s an Animagus but he doesn’t. (Would Remus even want him there?)

It doesn’t seem like they’re in touch at all until then either? Dangerous, etc etc, but these are supposedly the kids who snuck around school as animals undetected for years and one of them has escaped Azkaban so it would have been feasible to be in contact if they’d wanted to. It’s also significant to me that Sirius didn’t leave Remus anything in his will despite him struggling financially (vs James actively helping Remus out) and Remus is like..fine after he dies. It’s understandable because they were separated for longer than they initially knew each other. They were obviously friends, but different and more distant in comparison to their individual friendships with James. It all culminates for me in a friendship that is based on a shared youth, on the memory of freedom, on love for a mutual friend, on existing in the same place at the same time, on mutual respect for magical ability, on curiosity for the constraints of magic, on holding the same values but still being fundamentally different people.

I don’t think that the Marauders were a particularly equal group anyway but with Peter specifically I think it was more an illusion of equality and inclusion that James and Sirius think is ‘enough’ for Peter but that Peter finds it lacking. James and Sirius definitely don’t view him as equal with Remus, but they also spare him from the kind of bullying we see Snape get, despite Snape being more capable and logically worthy of their respect (were he not interested in dark magic or ugly, I guess).

I think that James and Peter’s friendship was the most mutually transactional. Peter’s inclusion in the group was social security for him first and foremost and James’ ego also got stroked a lot from having Peter around. James would pat himself on the back for being friends with someone like Peter lmao. All we see of James and Peter’s dynamic is James saying to Peter: “How thick are you, Wormtail?” and Peter openly adoring James when he plays with the Snitch and James lapping it up. Despite the derision and harshness, Peter actively feeds James’ ego, which isn’t a sustainable dynamic for a genuine friendship and it clearly irritates Sirius. I think that’s more Peter performing a role for his own continued benefit rather than him being stupid enough to not notice that James is being a dick though.

The combination of Peter’s capabilities being underestimated by his friends and James’ sense of duty and love towards his friends would foster a lowkey mentor/pupil, big brother/little brother dynamic but it would boost James’ ego while treating Peter as less intelligent than he actually was. I’m sure Peter benefited from it (Animagus transformations) but I can see James playing into it more heavily than necessary. However James and Peter are the two with the most typical childhoods and upbringings, so I think it would be an easy casual one-on-one dynamic, they’d have a lot of common experiences, a lot of the same reference points that Remus missed out on and Sirius’ family didn’t approve of that would make them feel close but they’re just opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of confidence, wit, popularity that beyond that I don’t think they’d have a lot in common except their shared high opinion of James (!) and there would be a lot of James talking at Peter and Peter agreeing. I don’t think Peter would be that into Quidditch beyond maybe the glory of it and James overlooks this with Sirius and understands why Remus isn’t into it but with Peter he’s like how what why ?? 

Ultimately unequal but I think James has that ability to make you feel like you’re the only person in the world when it’s a one-on-one thing and that would be something that Peter would strive for all the time but never quite get. I definitely think that James thinks he loves Wormtail but whether he actually does or treats him like he does is an entirely different thing.

With Sirius, we only see him treat Peter with contempt and I don’t think it’s oversimplification to accept this basically at surface level. I don’t think Sirius ever really respected Peter and generally regarded him as weak. Even Sirius’ irritation at James showing off with the Snitch is diverted through Peter in a way designed to humiliate Peter and relieve James of responsibility and to distance James from Sirius' reproach whilst giving Peter the full force of it and I think that shows how disposable and irrelevant he was to Sirius. (It’s not that far off some of the comments he makes about Snape and Kreacher.) 

This is a relationship Sirius would have had to work really hard at. Peter is the friend he is always irritated at and is mentally like "god just go away just fuck off". Sometimes he'd be like "aw he's not that bad I should be easier on him" but he mostly never is. Sirius likes Peter most as a rat, unironically, because for Sirius that’s probably when he sees the most potential in Peter. The way Peter works so hard to please James (and James’ acceptance of his attention) would irritate Sirius. Sirius loves James and makes a lot of allowances for him but he would find Peter’s sucking up degrading and embarrassing and think less of him for it, like “I like James more than you but you don’t see me pissing myself over him”. 

Peter I think was scared of Sirius, because of Sirius just being openly hostile but also because of his family. Peter would suck up to Sirius in the same way he did James but it doesn’t work on Sirius and Peter is like “well idk how to act then” so he’s constantly trying to find ways to get Sirius to like him and falling short so eventually he plays into Sirius’ underestimation of him (very successfully, clearly). I think Sirius’ whole “nobody would suspect him because he’s so stupid” sentiment grew in hindsight but existed somewhat at the time of choosing Peter as Secret Keeper. Sirius would never knowingly do something that he thought would even slightly risk James' safety so I completely believe that he trusted Peter and believed in a vague mutual understanding of friendship despite his lack of patience and respect for him. 

(Sorry this is SO FUCKING LONG, esp the Sirius & Remus bit bc I always feel I have to justify that one more, plus there’s way more in-text stuff for them. Once again ty for the ask! <3 Loved answering it, hate myself for being inarticulate but oh well)

tell me lily and Snape didn't invent new magical drug potions while smoking (gilly)weed in moaning myrtle's bathroom and I won't believe you

thinking about how in gof, sirius says “ever since i found out snape was teaching here, i’ve wondered why dumbledore hired him” and goes onto explain how snape was famous for the dark arts at school and part of a slytherin gang that all turned out to be death eaters (who we later find out were attacking students with dark magic). so he’s one of the only people to immediately be like “why the fuck is dumbledore letting snape teach children”. then says that as far he knows snape was never even accused of being a death eater but many of them were never caught. but when ron keeps insisting that snape must be a death eater, sirius disagrees and reasons it out, because he doesn’t think it makes sense based on the facts, and also because: “there’s still the fact that dumbledore trusts snape, and i know dumbledore trusts where a lot of other people wouldn’t, but i just can’t see him letting snape teach at hogwarts if he’d ever worked for voldemort.” (so even while questioning dumbles, sirius clearly still has way too much faith in him. which makes everything in ootp extra infuriating). anyways, sirius was willing to give snape the benefit of the doubt on being a death eater, like, he’s perfectly capable of being rational about snape and not jumping to conclusions despite his hatred of him!

and then at the end of gof he finds out that snape WAS in fact a death eater, and sirius has no proof or reason to believe that snape has actually changed, all he has to work off of is that Dumbledore Trusts Snape, even though all sirius knows is that snape literally tried to hand him (and remus) to the fucking dementors and outed remus, and witnessed snape going unhinged at his godson and two other teenagers in the same scene.

and now he has to work alongside snape knowing that he apparently paid no consequences for his death eater past, wasn’t even so much as accused of being one (not unlike lucius malfoy and karkaroff and the others who did deals with the ministry and clearly haven’t changed their ways, who sirius shows bitterness towards in gof) while sirius was branded as one by the ministry and the whole wizarding world and unjustly imprisoned for it for 12 years without even getting a trial.

and snape is constantly taunting him about the fact that he can’t leave the house and help the order because of the world STILL thinking that sirius is a death eater and murderer because of that very same unjust imprisonment that the fascist hate group snape joined directly fucking caused, and snape the actual former death eater is able to do these things and live freely because he got away with it all. and he might complain about it but sirius still puts up with all of that for months along with all the other shit he has to deal with in ootp.

then he’s told that snape has to teach harry occlumency, and makes sure to sit with harry rather than letting snape talk to him alone, and is apparently the ONLY one to question this clearly terrible stupid ass decision and ask why dumbledore can’t teach him instead. yeah sirius starts off with a petty comment or two but harry even looks to sirius to intervene on his behalf, and sirius does. sirius calmly and firmly warns snape not to use occlumency lessons to give harry a hard time, to which snape responds by insulting not only his fifteen year old godson but his dead best friend, that voldemort, who snape WORKED FOR, literally murdered, to sirius’s face. OF COURSE SIRIUS IS GONNA LOSE IT. ANYONE WOULD. and the first thing sirius says is “i don’t care if dumbledore thinks you’ve reformed, i know better” and refers to snape being lucius malfoy’s lapdog bc he knows they were fellow death eater buddies at hogwarts and during the war, like wow i wonder why sirius would have doubts about snape’s loyalties, especially after what he just said??!? this is not an example of sirius’s supposed ~crazy uncontrollable temper~, any normal person would want to throw down at something like that, personally i think sirius showed an impressive amount of self control for managing to wait that long to try to hex snape. AND he makes sure to give harry the mirrors specifically so harry can contact him if snape treats him badly, because that’s all sirius can do at that point when he’s powerless and his input is being completely ignored.

anyways it’s truly a tragedy that sirius never even got to find out that snape was the death eater who told voldemort about the prophecy, i think sirius deserved to know and go completely unhinged at snape!!! as was his right!!!!!

"who radicalized you" ever since i was a child i wanted other people to be treated nicely and fairly because i didnt understand why theyd deserve otherwise and it fills me with disgust seeing how people treat their fellow human beings sometimes

i love this bit sm in deathly hallows bc they were all so sad and yk scared that seeing hermione being "back to normal" in a way made them both smile at the normality.

ps. a little before this harry points out that hermione was so focused in what was happening in the moment and debating with ron that she forgot she was mad at ron and harry also was relieved by that lmao by boi loves them both sm i wanna cry.

this book has so many tiny moments like this that i love sm.

Can’t wait for the Dean fic! Can we as a collective acknowledge that Dean and Ginny got together very shortly after she dumped Michael. That means he must’ve been flirting with her while they were still together. Dean ‘steal your girl’ Thomas

Dean Thomas when he sees Ginny giving Michael Corner the time of day:

Dean has rizz it’s canon soooo I had to drop a sneak peek of him in action 👀

First DA meeting back after Christmas, he’d asked how her dad was doing. She’d let him know the good news in her typical Ginny way, quick joke, shut down need for further questions (‘he’s doing alright. Not dead, that’s the main thing. What’s a couple of snake bites between friends?’) But he’d wanted to keep her there, keep chatting before she drifted back over to the Ravenclaws, so had pressed it a bit, asked if they’d spent the holidays between Devon and St Mungo’s. Whenever he’d pictured wizard hospital, it’d been a bit like an episode of Casualty but with more owls, and when he’d pictured Devon it was the proper seaside, like when his primary school did that trip to Southampton and his mate Liam threw that crisp packet at a seagull. Of course, then his brain had conjured up Ginny on a beach, bikini, licking something. There’d been something extra daring about imagining it when she’d been right there, chatting to him, her boyfriend stood five yards away, chatting with all the other Ravenclaws who wouldn’t know a good laugh if it hit them round the face.

‘Oh, we weren’t in Devon in the end,’ she’d said. ‘We ended up staying in London.’

‘Really? D’you have family in London, or something?’ We could’ve met up, he’d thought. Imagined taking her - somewhere. Wherever people take girls — he’d have to ask one of his cousins. Maybe go central, or use that Christmas money from his auntie to take her to the cinema or the good chicken shop in Forest Gate, hold her hand on the bus. He’d glanced over at Michael, who’d started eyeing the two of them suspiciously from over by the crash dummy, and resisted the urge to wave.

‘It’s a bit complicated,’ she’d said. Her smile was apologetic, curving its way out of her bottom lip. He’d wanted to ask more but didn’t know how, and her tone sounded final, so he’d dropped it. It would be ages til he’d learn what that smile meant — all cover, hiding things he’d had no hope of ever asking about. ‘Sorry to be cryptic.’

‘Nah,’ he’d said. ‘Keeping it mysterious, I like it.’

Little glint in her eye, mischief. ‘Well, you know. A girl’s got to keep her secrets close to her chest.’

‘Good place for them.’ Alright. Doing it? Yeah? Ok, he’s doing it: ‘Maybe I could have a look sometime.’

For a second he’d really thought he’d fucked it. But a new smile had crept up her face, then, like she’s intrigued, impressed, by the sheer audacity of it.

‘Ginny.’ Of course, then Corner had shown up, face like thunder, come to claim what’s his. ‘We’re pairing up, Harry’s just said. Thomas, you get your own partner, yeah?’

ginny weasley is as loyal as ron, as cool as bill, as funny as the twins, as fiery and protective as mrs weasley, as understanding and indifferent to other peoples’ opinions as mr weasley, as much of an animal lover as charlie, as stubborn as percy and they STILL gave her the personality of a wet rag in the films

Basically agree with all of this but damn, a 13 inch height difference is mad!

Canon Couples and the Random Heights I Assigned Them

Just because I recently re-read this post and it's on my mind. Here's what I think these canon couples' final heights came to be and some justifications behind my thought process, as well as some headcanons. Let's start with my OTP -

Harry (6'1") and Ginny (5'0")

I'm kinda obsessed with the idea that 17yo Harry being the same height as his 21yo deceased father would grow just a couple more inches

Ginny being 5ft fits with her being the noticeably "smallest one" in the DoM during OOTP and with Harry being able to easily look over her head during the infamous First Kiss scene in HBP, putting her head at chest height of Harry (as of HBP)

Ginny is the only one who knows about Harry's petty satisfaction when he ran into Draco Malfoy some years after the war and realized he had continued to grow and Malfoy hadn't

James (5'11") and Lily (5'8")

Because they're both tall enough to be considered "tall", but not the kind of tall that is shocking

Lily being 5'8" makes her tall enough to have to look down at 14yo Harry in the graveyard scene of GOF

Ron (6'5") and Hermione (5'8")

In order for Fred and George to be "shorter and stockier" than 14yo Ron, but still slightly over 6ft so as to shrink to 5'11" in DH, I have to assume Ron's final height came to be one that most people would put in the "Holy shit you're tall" category

I know I'm going to get shouted at for Hermione's height, because she's never described as particularly tall in the books HOWEVER she's never described as particularly short either, just shorter than Harry

This 9 inch height difference give Ron & Hermione the perfect height difference for Ron to comfortably rest his chin on her head without having to hunch over awkwardly like Harry does with Ginny, so I'm sticking to it

Arthur (5'11") and Molly (4'11")

I know the movies made Arthur short and round, but he was described as thin in the books and all the Weasley boys wind up being pretty tall, so they had to get that from somewhere.

Molly is consistently described as short and dumpy throughout the series, and while Ginny is often compared to Molly physically, I just like the idea that Ginny managed to grow that extra inch that Molly never did.

Draco (6'0") and Astoria (5'11")

we know in DH Draco was slightly taller than Harry at the Malfoy Manor scene (p.457, U.S. edition of DH), so if we assume the like linked post above that Harry was 5'11" during DH, then I'd put Draco at 6 foot.

we literally know nothing about Astoria (CC doesn't count), but I picked 5'11" because it is the curse of all tall women to wind up with men roughly the same height

Lucius (5'10") and Narcissa (5'10")

we know Harry and Narcissa are the same height in HBP, so I put her at 5'10"

correct me if I'm wrong, but Lucius is never described as particularly tall, while Narcissa is. And of course, tall for a woman is average for a man. I put Lucius to be around around the same height as Narcissa because I just don't see Lucius' personality allowing him to be with a woman taller than himself.

also, see the curse of tall women above