Humans Are Space Orcs

Humans are space orcs (2)

It seems like you guys liked the space orcs post-

Alien *over coms*: Your ship is pinpointed, and you are targeted, you can stop or we may have to use excessive force to dock.

Humans *over coms*: We will file a police report! This will not go unknown. If you dock without permission, we might put this on your permanent record

Aliens : All it takes is one shot and your entire system goes now, red-tape is of no concern!

Humans :  Who told you that?- It doesn’t matter. According to A-B5.6 we will be notifying you of our departure

Aliens : Humans, silly ones. So worried about red-tape.

Aliens: *Shoot a missile to the thrusters*

Humans: *Ship slows down to a halt*

*The Alien’s ship docks on the human ship*

*In the Alien ship*

Alien Commander: Why isn’t the dock opening? I demand answers!

A1: Well- I think I know the issue-

Alien Commander: Well, what are you waiting for! Lead me to the issue

A2: *Leads him to a wide glass panel overlooking the human ship*

The shields of the flicker from light blue to a dark blue with white text overlaid.

System.S0x073SXE has crashed

Overriding SYSTEM account

Device DIV0348.637.dock(1.94) has stopped

Device DIV0845378.637.Athrust(6.27) has stopped

Device DIV03458.637.Bthrust(7.24) has stopped

Restarting System. S0x073SXE.bUP.Athurst

Restarting System. S0x073SXE.bUP.Bthrust

The dock, thruster A and B fall away from the humans ship

2 new thrusters the show up were thruster A and B show up with yellow paint and green text saying “Backup Thruster”

Alien *over coms*: What happened?

Humans *over coms*: Have you every heard of modularity, the power to throw away part as we see fit! We can remove up 95% of our ship and it will still work just fine! However, one hit to any part of yours you render you unable to perform!

Aliens : *…* Why haven’t we thought about this before?

MY FIRST HUMANS ARE WIERD/SPACE ORCS POST (made entirely by me)

so you know about humans protecting their family, friends, and ect. But they also protect anything they grow an affection to. Animals, Fish, even Things that aren't able to feel, grow or move! (Rocks lmao)

So here's my story.

Rehaans door slides open. All of the crewmates turn to see he’s holding a black hairy carnivore.

Lisa: Oh my god they’re so cute!

Alex: YOOO CAT

Qatàa and Ztrè seem to be horrified by the sight of it and demand Rehaan to not let the beast off his arms. As a stubborn person he is, he gently lets the cat on the floor, and it starts walking towards them. The aliens shriek in fear and quickly rushes behind the other humans for protection.

Rehaan laughs as he walks to the cat and starts petting it.

Rehaan: aww you’re so cute

He says while gently patting their head. Suddenly Qwàtz comes out of his room and sees it.

All of the crewmates dislike Qwàtz after he continuously annoy every one of the humans in hopes for them to reconsider staying on the ship. He looks at us, then moves his eyes to the hairy furball now staring at him with their bright yellow eyes.

Qwàts: What kind of ugly beast did you bring to the ship now? Disgusting!

Rehaans anger starts building up, as his eyes widen in furiosity.

Rehaan: You call my cat ugly one more time and i’l-

Qwàts: Kill you? I’ve heard that from you and your.. ‘’friends’’ a million times already. It is starting to bore me.

Qwàts walks past the crewmates and shoves Rehaan out of the way, hitting the cat with his tentacle and sending it almost across the room on impact. Rehaan and the crewmates gasp in horror as they run towards the cat that has now gottan back on their feet and is hissing at Qwats.

And that’s when Rehaans last thread snaps. He tackles Qwàts and sends him to the ground. When Ztrè and Qatàa garbs Rehaan, Qwàts is already covering his face in fear, trembling.

Rehaan: Fucking deserved it.

Rehaan gently pushes the two other away from him and sprints towards his cat.

Alex: They’re totally fine. There is only a small bruise because they hit the floor, but overall no broken bones.

Qwàtz quickly stands up.

Qwàtz: Amazing!

Rehaan and the rest turns to him, confused.

Sara: What do you mean amazing?! You kicked the poor cat!

She yells furiously.

Qwàtz: So not only does humans protect their own kind if threatened or attacked, but also will protect everything they grow an affection to!

Rehaan: …So you tried to get an answer to a question you could just ask us about, but rather made us feel horrible for weeks?

Qwàtz: I mean I why not? I wished to try out something new to see how you guys response to it. I did not mean any harm, and i did not intend to damage your …

Rehaan: Cat

Qwàtz: Cat. But yea Qatàa made me do it since we were playing something called truth or da-

Rehaan: YOU MOTHERFU-

And that’s how Qatàa ended up getting a black eye

*Applause*

I hope you guys enjoyed it.

Be gay

Do crime

Thinking about a ship getting an absolute bully for their first human. The kind of human that knows most aliens are afraid of ‘death worlders’, the kind of human that knows where the line is and how far they can go before they get into trouble, and who they can intimidate to let them cross the line as they want.

Part of the crew is like “I knew humans were just as bad as I thought.” Human doesn’t care. Human represents the worst of humanity, but they’re necessary for the ship - they make themselves necessary, and are not afraid to put the rest of the crew at risk if their authority seems challenged.

And then, they get a new human, who is smaller than the first. The first human tries their usual tactics - and the second human breaks their nose. If they were on the ship itself, there’d be consequences, and the first human knows it. But the second human is not afraid to be labeled a troublemaker, and cause trouble for the first, they do. A fierce competition blooms between them, as the second human clearly attempts to muscle in on the first’s territory, despite everyone warning them not to. And as this goes on, the second human befriends the rest of the crew. They’re different than the first. They are kind, they are smart, they are loyal.

They are a death worlder.

During a shipment of endangered animals from another planet, the first human is mauled by the adults. The second human is injured trying to protect them, but to no avail, the first human is killed. Analysis revealed the first human was sprayed with a kind of pheromone that agitates the species - but there was no reason for the pheromone to have been released by the species. Something else is going on, and the captain know it. The second human, despite the clear trauma, accepts the interview.

After the interview ends, the captain turns off the official recording.

“Off the record,” they ask, “what really happened?”

The human swallows, closes their dark eyes.

“They were trying to steal the eggs,” they said. “I saw them - I heard them on a black line with a darkspace distributer.”

“Why didn’t you report it?”

“Not enough time. And I… I had a feeling they’d done it before.”

The captain waits. The human’s closed eyes water.

“You sprayed the pheromone on them,” the captain says.

The human nodded. “They were so busy with the eggs, they didn’t even notice.”

“But,” the captain says, “You tried to save them after.”

The human’s shoulders shake. “I did.” They sob. “I did. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, but I did it. I did it for all of you. I did it for us.”

The human cries.

No charges are filed. The crew would mutiny if their friend were charged with anything, though the captain finds some way to ease the moral strain on both their hands and the second human’s. Another human is brought on board to help with the strain of the first human’s loss. Thy are bright-eyed, clever fingered, sharp-witted, soft-hearted. It takes time to for the wounds caused by the first human - described as a bully by the humans, also ‘a real asshole!’ by the newest recruit - but now that they are gone, they can all recover, and move on.

The moral here? Humans are not always good, but they should never, ever be underestimated - when they claim a pack, they will protect it even from their own kind.

Sixth Fucking Sense Apparently

So humans have a funky little sixth sense for when someone/thing is looking at us and honestly wtf.

So an alien spy is trying to get human info getting progressively more concerned when the human they're tailing keeps looking around and acting like they know the alien is there. Maybe it's an alien species renowned for stealth and no other sentient in the galaxy had ever been able to spot them so at this point they're double checking themselves and going insane.

At this point the human's figured shit out and so they lead the alien into a trap much to Sneaky McSneakfuck's dismay and confusion.

So eventually humans hold a press conference about the whole stalker and the galactic federation or whatever it would be called is like:

GF: How in the dick shitting fuck did you know they were there??

Human: felt them watching me.

Gf: felt them fucking What.

A picture of Tarantula Nebula, also called 30 Doradus. The picture got taken on 22. August 2007 (my birthday)

Alien oc based off worm on a string

No but seriously, their capacious fur have me flinged to oblivion itself

Alien: why is Rehaan vibrating his legs so much? It's been an hour and he's still doing it. Isn't he exhausted?

Alex: nah, he has ADD, but I'm not sure why he moves a lot. He has told me it's fun and it makes him concentrate better, so why not let him

Alien: add? Add WHAT? CHEESE?

the process of transitioning has a lot of ups and downs. you will experience massive highs of euphoria and crushing lows of dysphoria as you change things about yourself. you will hate and love your new hair many times, you will be scared and excited by what hormone replacement therapy brings, you will be worried about how much you've changed yourself and if you can recognize the new person you see as yourself. you may struggle to adapt, you may accept everything gracefully as it comes, you may do a little of both. either way, it's okay to be affected by transition. it's okay to have highs and lows. it's okay to both love and hate what you're experiencing. it's okay to struggle, if you do. transition is hard, but it's worth it for those who want it.

I wanna try writing situations about humans are wierd, humans are space orcs and ect

Got any ideas? Because everything i come up with is already written down 🧍