Babygirl The Way You Forsake Your Happiness On Your Relentless Quest To Vengeance, Your Complicated Relationship

meals i eat on a $50/week grocery budget

I am a PhD student living on a stipend of under $18,000 per academic year, and I have a grocery budget of $50 per week to feed myself and my dog. I typically buy groceries once a month, where I spend under $200 at Costco, and fill in the gaps with $50 or less at Fred Meyer (a PNW Kroger brand) or Walmart (the bane of my existence). The final prices average to $50 per week.

The first trick is to look for building blocks you can buy in bulk instead of thinking about recipes individually. Spices, canned goods, meat, produce. Costco and Sams Club are good, but take advantage of the bulk prices and lack of member fee at Smart & Final instead if there’s one in your area.

If you're buying spinach and tomatoes for pasta, think about adding other salad ingredients to finish off that spinach package. If you're buying a package of shredded pork for sliders, consider using the leftovers for street tacos.

I also try and utilize all my leftovers. If I only need a small portion of a red onion for a recipe, I'll use the rest to make pickled red onions and try to think of something that will use them in the next couple weeks. A lot of my dog safe produce waste—strawberry tops, cucumber ends, carrot skins—go to my dog as an easy reward. (Reminder that if it’s rotten and you wouldn’t eat it, you probably shouldn’t be feeding it to your dog, either.)

The second trick is to utilize your freezer. Freeze produce close to it's expiration date, find a recipe for it where the texture won't matter. Freeze meat until you're ready to use it to prevent it dying a sad, stinky death in the hidden depths of the meat drawer. Sometimes I'll cook an extra big batch of something with the intent of freezing half of some of the components to be used at a later time (the chicken in the pita pockets is the same as the chicken in the meal prep bowls, but I don't like having them in the same week). I also keep a few backup meals in the freezer just in case I get Big Sick and don't feel like cooking for a while.

The third trick is to reject brand loyalty. Your new lord and savior is "what's on sale" and "store brand". As someone who regularly had access to both the high price and budget options of the foods I like, there are plenty of types of food where there's no discernible difference in quality between price points.

The building blocks I keep in my house are:

Chicken breast.

If you don’t like handling raw meat (or don’t have the equipment to cook it) I highly recommend the Costco rotisserie chicken instead. It’s a large chicken and it’s under $7 for the whole thing (at least where I live in AK) and it’s already cooked! There’s plenty of meat on it and if you’re into DIY stuff you can use the carcass to make your own chicken broth.

Ground beef (I like 85:15)

Broths/stocks (i like to keep beef, chicken, and vegetable on hand)

Eggs

Rotel cans (there is more than one flavor and I find them convenient)

Canned pumpkin purée (I keep this on hand year round to give to my dog in the event of digestion issues, but it has plenty of other uses)

Tomato paste

Black beans (they're cheaper dried and bagged, but canned is fine if you dont have the time or energy for bean prep)

Chickpeas (they're cheaper dried and bagged, but canned is fine if you dont have the time or energy for bean prep)

Lentils (split lentils are more expensive but they cook way faster)

Onions

Carrots (these double as dog treats)

Garlic

Sweet potatoes (also can be dog treats) or russet potatoes when sweet potatoes aren’t in season

Parsley (I have it growing in my kitchen)

Basil (also growing in my kitchen)

Cilantro (additionally growing in my kitchen)

Green onions (growing in my kitchen)

Butter, margarine, olive oil

Flour

Baking soda and baking powder

Brown and white sugar

Noodles (whichever shape is on sale when I'm buying)

Top ramen packets (for the stove)

Sandwich bread

Bread crumbs (I make these using the heels of bread from my sandwich bread or leftover buns when the meat to bun ratio doesn't add up)

Single serving oatmeal packets

Rice (I buy the 10 lb bag from the grocery store which lasts me about a year...)

Oat milk (it's shelf stable to reduce food waste)

Coconut milk (also shelf stable)

Vanilla yogurt (big tub)

Greek yogurt (big tub)

Frozen fruit mix (these double as dog treats)

Most of the building blocks are purchased in bulk when I can. I will get a new package of whatever is running out when necessary. My entire spice cabinet is the store brand spices (almost, there've been a few fancy spice gifts recently). You can get nice herbs and spices from Walmart's Great Value brand. My food is no less delicious for it.

Breakfast:

Oatmeal. I get mine in the bulk 52 pack from costco and eat two packets at once. I would get the big canister instead, but I’m not very good at flavoring them when they come that way and it generally just makes me sad instead

Currently (sept 2024) working on big canister DIY oatmeal and overnight oats. Will report back when I manage something that isn't terrible :)

Store brand bagel with store brand cream cheese (Philadelphia is eggspensive)

Eggo waffles+peanut butter. I get the bulk 72(?) pack from costco, because they're leagues better than store brand toaster waffles and also significantly cheaper than buying freezer waffles of any kind in any smaller package. Make a little sandwich+enjoy.

Outside Breakfast: This is what I eat if I'm going to do Outside Work, like field sampling or ice climbing or hiking to the top of Mt. Healy

I Live In A Place Where Fruit Doesn't Grow Smoothie: utilizes yogurt, plant milk, frozen fruit mix. If I end up with extra I put it on a lick mat for my dog.

Breakfast tacos: utilizes egg, and leftover produce and leftover tortillas from taquito, quesadilla, or pulled pork taco recipes.

Home fries and egg: utilizes potato, onion, egg

Leftovers Egg Sandwich: utilizes egg, leftover meat (like lunchmeat or other thin sliced meat) and leftover produce or sauce, and leftover bread

Lunch:

Greek chicken meal prep boxes: utilizes chicken, greek yogurt, rice, onion, garlic

Chickpea and lentil roasted red pepper soup+grilled cheese: utilizes chickpeas and lentils, sandwich bread (vegetarian/vegan)

Black bean quesadilla: utilizes black beans, onion, cilantro (vegetarian)

Black bean taquitos: utilizes black beans, onion, garlic, cilantro, rice (vegan, requires a blender/food processor)

Chicken sandwich + roasted red pepper soup

Sausage pasta: utilizes noodles, onion, garlic

Pita pockets: utilizes chicken, yogurt, cilantro

Smashed chickpea avocado sandwich: utilizes chickpeas, cilantro, rotel (vegan!)

Dinner:

Chick(en)pea Curry: utilizes chicken, chickpeas, rotel, onions, garlic, cilantro, rice (omitting chicken makes it vegan)

Mac and cheese: utilizes noodles, breadcrumbs (vegetarian)

Mom's goulash: utilizes onion, garlic, ground beef, noodles,

White chicken chili: utilizes chicken broth, chicken, onion, garlic

Fire sick soup: utilizes chicken, carrots, garlic, onion, chicken broth (SPICY)

Magic sick soup: utilizes chicken, carrots, onion, garlic, veggie broth

Darn Good Chili: utilizes ground beef, tomato paste, black beans, onion

Sheet pan chicken fajitas: utilizes chicken, onion, garlic

Coconut ginger carrot soup+garlic bread: utilizes carrot (vegan)

Chicken tortilla soup: utilizes leftover chicken from sheet pan fajitas, onion, garlic, chicken broth

Moms meatloaf: utilizes ground beef, rotel, breadcrumbs, egg

Carnitas tacos: utilizes rice, black beans, onions, cilantro. I commit the crime of buying the preshredded pork from Costco, because I hate shredding meat by hand and don’t have a mixer to do it for me. I like to pair this with a mango peach habanero salsa. (SPICY)

Pumpkin pasta sauce: utilizes noodles, onion, garlic,

Snacks:

Vanilla yogurt + granola: both of these are store brand. Walmart makes surprisingly decent (and decently priced, at that) granola

Veggies + hummus: I eat most of my veggies raw like this. Costco sells bulk hummus but I don’t love how much extra packaging their produce comes with. If time, energy or prep space are a problem for you, you can buy precut veggies but let it be known that those no longer qualify as a budget item.

Tortilla chip + salsa/guacamole: costco sells all of these items in bulk at very cheap. One 3 pack of guac and a tub of salsa gets me through one whole bag of tortilla chips.

Ramen + egg: this is what I eat when it's too late for lunch but too early for dinner and I'm starving

Granola + chocolate chip: I guess this is just a deconstructed granola bar but it’s a 3:1 granola:chocolate ratio

Other stuff:

DIY spices

Fancy herb butter

Sweet potato dog treats

Non-Budget items

Coconut brownies (spruced up Ghirardelli box brownies, recipe stolen from a professor at my university)

Dads Goulash

Lomo Saltado

I don't currently feel like doing the math for these, but I do actually only spend roughly $50 a week on groceries. (Currently the underlined ones are the ones I have a full linked recipe posted for, which I work on in my spare time).

Additional notes: I don’t really do the whole calorie counting thing, but I do try to eat at least one serving of a food from each major food group a day as a way to naturally enforce variety and balance out my diet.

the end of the semester is here!

its nearing the end of my first year of college, and i take my final exam in 2 days, so today was a day of productivity

took out trash started a new book cleaned the bathroom studied finished the final paper took an exam organized my playlist registered for summer classes

Sylvia Plath, aged 22, in a letter to Ann Davidow-Goodman (dated Tuesday, 23 November 1954)

THINGS WRITERS SHOULD DO TODAY: 

Write 

Straighten their backs 

Celebrate their victories 

Write anything 

Take the empty cups out of their rooms 

Seriously. Stop overthinking and just write 

How many times do I have to tell society that I'm most productive at 2am

Why Originality in Writing Isn't Always Possible

I was writing for years before I encountered a problem with writing as a whole—that most ideas have already been published.

When someone first told me that though, they said it like, "You'll never think of something that hasn't already been written."

The phrasing makes it sound like all story ideas are a waste of your time. I began spiraling. I researched every short story I'd ever written. I looked up books similar or identical to other books I loved.

Turns out, that person was right.

Sort of.

New Ideas Are Old News

Think about how long humanity has existed. Think about the many experiences that generations have shared—love, loss, happiness, adventure, self-growth, your coming-of-age years.

Story ideas inspired by whatever you go through in life have likely already been lived or thought of, given the trillions of people who have walked this planet and interacted with each other.

BUT

Originality Doesn't Only Come From Ideas

This is what I wish someone had told me back when I was spiraling.

I'll say it again for those in the back—

Originality Doesn't Only Come From Ideas

It also comes from your voice and your perspective!

Voice can feel tricky to grasp when you're starting out as a writer. Everyone can throw a few words on a page. How do you know what your voice sounds like and if readers will respond well to it?

Imagine two friends going on a trip. They do everything together. They sit on the beach, they eat lunch at a restaurant, and watch a movie before heading home. Then they each journal about their day in notebooks.

Those entries would look nothing alike! One friend might relax on the beach and feel so at peace that they take a nap, while another gets sunburned easily and hides under their umbrella with a scowl. Both ultimately enjoyed their day for different reasons. The beach lover got time by the ocean and the other friend who liked the beach much less fell in love with a new dish at the restaurant because they're a foodie.

You'll also frame your stories differently than any other writer. Like accents change the way every person speaks out loud, writers structure sentences and describe things/events/emotions very differently.

These may seem like insignificant details that set stories apart, but they make all the difference.

Think about Homer’s Odyssey. Circe is a minor character in the long tale and basically gets about a minute of the reader's time before Odysseus moves on to the next phase of his journey home. In Madeline Miller's Circe, the goddess becomes the main character and the ultimate portrayal of fear, rage, hurt and healing that are universally experienced but are especially true to the female experience.

Both stories follow the same timeline, so readers don't pick them up to necessarily get surprised by something Brand New to Literature™. Instead, they read direct retellings to learn from the characters in new ways, live momentarily through someone else's eyes, and bond over another aspect of the human experience.

Circe is an incredible work of art. Your idea—whether it's a direct retelling, indirect retelling, or full of literary devices from previous works—can be incredible too.

How Do You Know Which Ideas Are Worth Writing?

If a story idea doesn't immediately make you jump for your computer or a pen/paper, is it worth writing? My best advice is to sit with it.

Some of my best work has come from stories that got to marinate. I put them in the back of my mind and thought about the characters or themes or plot when something sparked another idea. By the time I started typing, the story was more vivid than when I first though of it.

But also, I have probably twenty failed ideas for every story I've written.

Give yourself time to get to know your ideas. If they're worth your time, they'll sit with you too.

Listen to me: You get good at things by being bad at them. You learn by failing. You gain competency and a sense of mastery by failing at something many times and in many interesting ways.

The sooner you are able to laugh at your own failures, to enjoy the process of messing up, the easier life will be. Because you'll no longer be afraid of learning.

And once you're no longer afraid of failing, you can learn anything.

Huh, I didn't see that coming.

- Me writing a story written and outlined by me.

writers

art tips

don't call what you create "content". regardless of what it is. that's the devil talking. call it art, call it writing, call it music, call it analysis, call it editing, literally just call it what it is

I was going to put other things but oh my god please just don't call yourself a "content creator". you are a person you are making art / writing / music / etc you are an artist an author a musician

you are not an Image Generator For Clicks And Views. please. allow yourself to connect with your work by naming it properly and acknowledging yourself in kind

A Beginner’s Guide to Dark Academia

tips for the baby aesthete’s out there

academia

actually study! study the things you love, the things you like, the things you know nothing about — the pursuit of knowledge lasts a lifetime, and there is so much to learn

visit your professor’s office hours! it always helps to make yourself known to your teachers (i’ve been given grade bumps and had great conversations with my university lecturers)

avoid and check yourself for the pretension that can often accompany academia — it hurts no one to be kind and mindful

delve into the realm of philosophy (for starters: metaphysics, epistemology, aesthetics) it will broaden your mind

stay late at your university library studying (if you can do so safely, preferably with a friend). university campuses feel magical in the evening

style

wear darker, muted colours

plaid coats, pants, or skirts

button-up shirts (Peter Pan collars are a bonus)

turtlenecks

tie your hair with a bow

accessorise! a vintage watch adds sophistication to any outfit. try wearing it with a ring or three

practice good posture — standing tall creates an air of elegance, confidence, and if paired with the right amount of nonchalance, mystery

media

films

dead poets society

cracks

the dreamers

thoroughbreds

breathless (à bout de souffle)

cléo from 5 to 7 (cléo de 5 à 7)

handsome devil

tv shows

gilmore girls

chilling adventures of sabrina

black mirror

the good place

the politician

books

the secret history

the picture of dorian gray

the goldfinch

the line of beauty

persuasion

the collected poems of oscar wilde 

ovid’s metamorphoses

music

listen to classical music as you sleep/read/study

you can check out this dark academia playlist for inspiration

aesthetic activities (think of this as a little checklist to get you underway as a fledgling aesthete)

make yourself tea in pretty teacups (you can find plenty in secondhand stores!)

light candles in your bedroom, and read by candlelight 

dry flowers for your room/desk

explore secondhand bookstores for old, pretty editions of novels you may or may not have heard of

give handwritten letters to your lovers/friends/yourself

wake up before the sun rises to watch dawn break

brood during a thunderstorm, and write extravagant, flowery poetry on parchment

join a secret society

exist in the real, with your books and art, and your turtlenecks and plaid coats, as a mystery. social media can give too much of you away

host an unceasing bacchanal for you and your pals

I hope this serves as a nice little guide for some of you wanting to get more into the aesthetic! There’s no real right or wrong way to go about it, these are just my suggestions from my own experience and perception of and within the community. 

Enjoy, 

Juniper x