also i feel like batman is too paranoid not to teach his kids to use a gun just in case
"erm actually Batman didn't teach any of his Robins how to handle a gun—" absolutely NOT. In Alfred Pennyworth's household? Don't make me laugh. Every single one of those kids have perfect trigger discipline.
Tim, 36 hours of sleep driving like a madman on Gotham roads: FUCKING MOVE. SLOW MOTHER FUCKER WHAT ARE YOU- OH YEAH? JUST WONDER TO THE RIGHT WITHOUT SIGNALLING WHY DONT YA? MAYBE NEXT TIME JUST DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND CRASH INTO THAT GODDAMN TRUCK THATS BACKING OUT THAT YOU DIDNT EVEN BOTHER TO GODDAMN SEE-
Damian, just wanting to get to school since Alfred couldn’t drive him: I assure you these imbeciles are not worth your anger Dra-
Tim: I SWEAR IF ANYONE CUTS ME OFF ONE MORE TIME.
*Gets cut off*
Tim: ALRIGHT BITCHES. I WARNED YOU.
Damian, screaming: DRAKE. STOP THIS INSTANT. DRAKE. YOU ARE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD-
nothing funnier to me than when AI does math wrong. like I get why it happens, it's a language model that's treating the numbers you feed it as words rather than integers and then giving you an answer based on how those words typically appear in a block of text instead of actually performing a calculation. but the one thing computers are genuinely incredible at. you fucked up a perfectly good calculator is what you did, look at it it's got hallucinations
i beat myself up for not knowing enough about my special interests a lot but then i remember the average person off the street has no idea what the carboniferous is and i feel better
'People are panicking about AI tools the same way they did when the calculator was invented, stop worrying' cannot stress enough the calculator did not forcibly pervade every aspect of our lives, has such a low error rate it's a statistical anomaly when it does happen, isn't built on mass plagiarism, and does not obliterate the fucking environment when you use it. Be so fucking serious right now
minimum wage needs to be $1000 an hour. rent needs to be $10. groceries need to be $2 total. and i need a back massage that ends in me getting my back blown the Hell out
Tim Drake, about trying to convince Batman to not almost kill criminals and himself:
things jon missed while stalking his colleagues:
the fact that sasha had been half lined up for gertrude's job and how that would be a pretty good murder motive
the discrepancy between elias's hiring in 1991 and how he said he was working as a filing clerk in 1972
tim's brother's mysterious disappearance/death directly preceding his change in careers
martin's real age and literally any of his academic or employment history
conclusion: he's bad at this <3
Joker dies bcs during his big dramatic speech of the day he tries to be be all insane and funny by pretending to shoot himself in the head with his BANG! flag gun but he fucks up getting distracted by flirting with Batman and mixes up his guns and he shoots himself in the face in front of the bats. Jason, who was being bodily held back from shooting him himself by Bruce and Dick for the past 15 minutes, laughs so hard he fractures a rib and has to be carried back to the batmobile
sexual attraction? you mean the thing that killed romeo and juliet?