Trying To Wrap My Brain Around The Fact That I Will Never Be In A Fairytale.
trying to wrap my brain around the fact that i will never be in a fairytale.
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Set Up | Sirius Black, Remus Lupin.
Pairings: Sirius X fem!reader Remus X fem!reader.
Summary: in which you’re in love with Sirius, but he sets you up with his friend.
Word count: 2.8k
Warnings: mentions of sex, kissing.
Note: if you guys want a second part to this please let me know, and maybe things I could add to the plot. Thank you thank you!
You were seated on the great hall's breakfast table, looking out for your best friend who you haven’t seen the entirety of yesterday and you’ve grown a little worried to say the least.
With a sandwich in hand you assumed he had other business to attend to.
You and Sirius were a little different on certain aspects and one of them is the fact that he’s interested in every girl that breathes, and you were interested in him.
You’ve always found yourself daydreaming about it until you’ve come to the conclusion that it could never happen, you weren’t on Sirius’s radar, and as much as it hurt, you still wanted to accept it.
The table shook as you looked up to see Sirius ahead of you, his hair perfectly put together, his black curls falling into his smudged eyes from an eyeliner.
“Morning.” Sirius smirked, you blinked at him before he took out a cigarette and lit it, hiding it beneath the table because smoking isn’t allowed in school and he knew that.
You scoffed, coughing a little from the smell catching up to your nose. “Where have you been?” You asked, your eyes roaming down to the shirt he was wearing, a white one with many buttons undone, his red and golden tie hanging around his neck as he blew the smoke in your face.
“Awh someone’s acting like my mother.” He smirked before your smile dropped, you knew his relationship with his mother, and it wasn’t exactly a pleasant one.
You shifted in your seat uncomfortably “Oh, so I’m being compared to walburga now.”
“Babe, relax.. I meant a mother, doesn’t mean my mother specifically.. you’re in a mood.” Sirius took another drag off his cigarette.
“Since when do you smoke this early?” You asked, a little baffled, you weren’t into smokers at all and you hated how much he smoked. “What’s with the interrogation?”
“I just want to know, I didn’t see you yesterday.” You asked, crossing your arms. “Well, that’s what I’m here for, I need to tell you about last night.” Sirius squished his cigarette down on your used plate before he licked his lips, his finger moving his hair away from his face, his smile undeniably bright and you hated it.
“What about last night? Banged a hot girl, the usual?” You scoffed before he giggled nodding. “That’s exactly what happened, ah she’s absolutely stunning.” He continued, making you roll your eyes as you placed your chin in your palm, trying to tolerate this conversation at all.
“I’d say, she’s the best so far.” Sirius smirked, searching through your eyes, waiting for your response as you couldn’t help but let out a bitter laugh. “You rank how good they are?” You asked as Sirius nodded eagerly.
“Not going to lie, so far so good, and they can’t complain.. I surely bring the best to the table that they scream in pleasure every time.”
Your eyes widened at that, taking a deep breath before pursing your lips in amusement. “Then I’m sure they won't complain.” You said, dropping your sandwich, losing your appetite from this conversation.
Not disgust, maybe jealousy is more like it, it still burns your heart every time you hear about it. They get to have him and you don’t.
Sirius was staring at you, probably thinking of something, something terrible before he started talking. “What did you do last night?” He asked, his fingertips tapping on the table in front of you. “Just napped.” You laughed, shrugging, you were waiting for him to hang out but as soon as he didn’t show up you just succumbed to your bed and fell asleep.
Sirius’s eyes narrowed, their cold gray burning into yours before he spoke again after a moment of silence. “You know, I think I should set you up.. with someone.” He crossed his arms as he spoke firmly. “What?”
“Come on, you heard me! Napping? That’s absolutely boring, you and this specific guy I have in mind would totally hit it off.. maybe even sleep together.” Sirius chuckled, his tone was a bit too enthusiastic for your liking as your heart sank, your eyes blinking at his words.
“Sirius, no.” You quickly dismissed it, you couldn’t just do it. You weren’t like that, you weren’t like him.. he’s the one you wanted.. not any other bloke he might set you up with.
Sirius rolled his eyes. “Can you just let me introduce him to you first? He’s quite good looking, isn’t that what you’ve always told me that’s important in your dream guy?” Sirius took your hand in his and squeezed it.
“But— Sirius.. I don’t know..”
“Isn’t it? He’s very good looking, can you please just see the guy first? Then you can refuse it.” Sirius stood up, not wanting to waste any time.
“Wait— Sirius, now?” You stood up with him as he nodded, taking a hold of your forearm. “Just say hi to him, maybe he’d be blessed to swipe that v card up.” Sirius giggled, making you cringe.
“Ew, please don’t say that, it sounds weird.” You followed him. “You know I absolutely hate you for this but sure, I’m a little curious now.”
“You won’t hate me once you see him, he is a total catch.” Sirius walked ahead of you as you rolled your eyes, your heart sinking the more you walked.
You were both standing in front of the library, Sirius holding your arms. “Wait here, I’ll fetch him really quick.” Sirius smiled, his white teeth flashing as you sighed, more worried than curious.
“Wait! How are you so sure he’d like me? Have you ever asked him? Do you even know him?” You rambled as Sirius tutted, shaking his head. “You’re overthinking this too much! Yes, I know him, he’s one of my best mates, just relax.. okay? You can always turn him down.. not that I’d let you.”
“I really have no choice, do I?”
“Nope.
You sighed and nodded. “Fine, go ahead and fetch him, don’t be long.” You placed your hand on his shoulder and pushed him inside the room before he yelped and made his way inside the library and you leaned against the wall, your heart was in your stomach at this point as you kicked at your feet.
The thing you caught yourself thinking of was, would you consider it? Sirius’s friend? Would you even be willing to just get over him like that? Did you even want to? Maybe you’d try and give this guy a chance but wouldn’t you hurt him? Thinking of someone else that wasn’t him? It wasn’t fair.. maybe you were also hoping Sirius’s friend would turn you down so things go back to normal and you don’t have to hurt anyone.
You were too caught up in your thoughts before you heard footsteps nearing the exit, where you stood, you quickly stood straight and fixed your hair, taking a deep breath.
Sirius was in view now, laughing at something his friend said before the much taller guy was in frame, looking down at Sirius with a smile on his scarred face.
Your jaw dropped, your eyes blinking, your throat drying, your heart pounding as his warm brown eyes fell on you. “Well, this is Remus Lupin, my best mate, the one I’ve told you about.” Sirius shook his friend's shoulder.
You were not going to lie, you didn’t expect someone this handsome, you didn’t know if you wanted to run and hide or scold Sirius for not telling you how exactly good looking his friend was, Remus.
“Uh.. yeah— hi, Remus..” you raised your hand to the taller guy, Remus did the same, taking your hand in his as you couldn’t help but stare, his hands were scarred as well, but he was insanely stunning as you managed to tell him your name.
Sirius smiled excitedly at you before he turned to his friend. “She’s the one I’ve been telling you about.”
“Really? Well it’s nice to finally meet you, Sirius never stops talking about you.” Remus started talking as you couldn’t help but notice his accent, it was different from yours and Sirius and you didn’t know what to think of it.
You grinned, flustered from head to toe. “I hope it’s all good things.”
“Oh yeah, definitely.. no need to worry.” Remus smiled, leaning against the frame, looking down at you as your eyes glanced at Sirius as he was holding back his laughter.
Making a mental note on murdering him later. “Well, now that that’s out of the way, I’ll get going.. have a good time— and use a condom.” Sirius walked away leaving you there with Remus, your face flushing at the last thing he said, avoiding eye contact.
“So.. would you like to walk with me?” Remus offered, his brownish blonde hair catching the sunlight, he was absolutely breathtaking and you felt like none of this was fair. “Yeah, sure.”
You and Remus walked together for what seems like hours, you got to know him, his favorite color, his favorite food, his favorite smell, his favorite flower, the books he reads, books he recommended to you, books he said he’d let you borrow, he was an absolute Angel and for a second, you completely forgot how hopeless you felt for Sirius.
It was two weeks later as you were hurrying in having some food in your system before Sirius popped up from behind you. “Morning!”
“Oh, hi! Good morning.” You said, swallowing the last bit of your apple juice. “What’s that?” Sirius asked, looking at the book in your hand. “Oh, it’s a book Remus lent to me.”
“Remus?” Sirius asked, and you nodded. Confused as to why you couldn’t read his expression. “So.. did he bone you?” Sirius smirked, sitting up, as if waiting for you to agree.
“Gosh, Sirius.. no he didn’t! We’re friends, not all of us are horn dogs like you.” You shook your head as Sirius laughed. “The main reason I set you up with him is to sleep with him, not borrow books from him.” Sirius shook his head as if he’s so disappointed.
“Why Sirius, I’m sorry for disappointing you, but I can’t sleep with him.”
“Why not? You got a disease or something?” Sirius joked as you rolled your eyes. “He’s my friend, and I don’t think he’s interested in me that way, so you might as well stop asking if I slept with him every two days.” You scrunched your nose up at him as he rolls his eyes groaning.
“Boring.” He got up. “But wait.. you said he’s your friend, is that the only excuse for you?”
“Why does this interest you?” You looked up at him, his gray eyes coldly staring into yours as he shrugged. “All I heard were excuses, forget sleeping with him, why don’t you maybe date him? Or whatever that is.” Sirius asked as you felt a tug at your heart. “I’m not looking for a relationship, right now.. or ever.”
“But why? I know I’m not the best person at these things but you seem to have built walls around you and no one dares to cross them.. is there a reason? Or do you just love isolation so badly?”
You sighed. “I’m not discussing this with you.”
“Why not?”
“It’s complicated! I’m complicated..” you sighed, rubbing your face, hating where this conversation was going.
“I don’t know what you think of yourself, but don’t hurt Remus just because.” He started as you scoffed in disbelief, as if he wasn’t the one doing all this elaborate nonsense just to get you to put yourself out there not even bothering to ask if you really wanted this from the start.
“No, you don’t get to say that.” You shook your head as he walked closer to you, his glance a little confused. “You’re the one who introduced me to him, now you’re worried about his feelings?”
“Of course I’m worried about his feelings, and yours too.. I really don’t want either of you to get hurt! How is that wrong?”
“Forget it Sirius.. I’m not talking about this.” You picked your things up and went on your way, not looking back, but knowing Sirius, he was probably confused and you were so tired of explaining it all, you wanted someone to just understand.
It was late as you had sneaked out of your dorm to get a breath of fresh air, get away from it all.
You walked down the steps to find a familiar sandy brown hair seated down the stairs as you cleared your throat. “Go away!” Remus angrily shouted, making you flinch before he turned around and saw you, his expression softening, an apologetic expression replacing it.
“Sorry.. you alright?” You asked, walking down the steps to sit next to him. “Yeah.. I thought you were those obnoxious head boys.” Remus looked away from you, his eyes looking more tired than you’ve ever seen them before, his hair falling into his eyes. “Are you okay, though?” Remus began as it was too quiet, which you enjoyed.
“Yeah.. I guess, I don’t know.” You shook your head, placing your elbows on your knees. “You can talk to me, you know?” Remus offered, edging closer to you.
“I had an argument with Sirius earlier, and he was being an idiot.. it just got to me.” You took a deep breath at the memory. “Sirius? You guys are close, though.” He said, and you could have sworn he sounded a bit bitter.
“We are, but.. sometimes I think other things matter to him more than I do.” You continued, your eyes reaching up to look at the boy in front of you, his brown eyes twinkling in the moonlight, he really was breathtaking.
“Other things like what?” Remus softly spoke, his scarred hand going to move his hair away from his eyes, not breaking eye contact, he seemed interested and it warmed your heart.
“Like girls, and sex.” You shook your head in disbelief at how you sounded, but it was true. “You like him, don’t you?” Remus interrupted, it’s like he saw right through you. Your heart sank but you nodded. “I hate that I do.. I hate it more than anything.”
“You know that’s not true, you love him, and you love that you love him.. and it’s obvious because you’ve never done anything about us hanging out.. I thought you agreed to go out with me to Sirius right? But you didn’t, you love him too much to give me a chance, is that right?” Remus asked as you felt like his words were a hammer to your chest, he was aware of everything and you couldn’t hate yourself more.
“I would have considered it, but I couldn’t hurt you like that.. I know me and Sirius are impossible, but you’re so good to me, I can’t waste that.”
“And you cared about hurting me more than.. more than maybe just giving me a chance? See what you think after how I could have treated you?” Remus edged closer and closer to you, his knee bumping into your thigh as he turned your face to his.
“But Remus—“
“Stop trying to spare my feelings, yes? I don’t care about that, I just know.. I have a feeling that you’re just scared, scared to give me a chance— not because of Sirius but because of you, what are you so afraid of?” Remus’s soft fingers went under your chin as you gulped.
Remus waited for a response but you couldn’t think of a proper answer, it all felt so vulnerable to utter, you like Remus, but you weren’t so sure of talking about such things just yet.
He caught on to your lack of response, not wanting to press you any further, but he wasn’t like Sirius, he waited, he cared.. Sirius only ever cared about himself, about whether you were there to listen to him or not.
“You love Sirius.. but you want to be with me, tell me I’m wrong and I’ll leave you be, stay friends, lend you my books whenever you like, tell me I’m right and I’ll treat you better than you could ever imagine, better than what Sirius could ever do.. I promise you that.” Remus stroked your bottom lip as he talked, his movement making your breath hitch in your throat, your knees weak and your heart pounding.
“You’re right..” you breathed out, his thumb parted your lips before he leaned in and kissed you, his lips so warm, so soft as you felt yourself getting lost in him, melting as his lips kissed you so intensely, his tongue licking your bottom lip as you parted your mouth further.
You were making out with a boy so beautiful, one that wants you, one that cares for you. So which will it be?
Taglist: @turvi @jamespottersdaisy @dancinglikeaballerina @junhuilvrrr @scottish-lover @jsjcue @thatdummy-girl
COFFEE, r. lupin
when you woke you could barely remember anything that happened the night before, let alone where you were. waking up in his bed. remus' bed. how did you even get there?
"morning." you heard from the door frame, remus holding two coffee mugs. you furrowed your brows "how?"
"take some advil and drink your coffee, then we'll talk." he said walking up to you and handing you a mug. "just how you like it."
you muttered a thanks before throwing two pills in your mouth and swallowing a gulp of coffee. the burning sensation running along your throat.
remus sat down next to you, sipping on his coffee before meeting your eye.
"what happened last night?" you said, trying to remember
"a lot." he said setting his coffee down and repositioning himself.
notes: another little drabble!! I'm just bored and want to test out more of my writing skills :)
Me on tumblr search bar looking for fics:
hmm..who am I going to be in love with today?
STARS, j. potter
"petal?" james whispered as he climbed into bed to see your eyes closed. he laid next to you, moving the pieces of hair out your face. "baby, can you wake up for me?" he asked before shaking you slightly. your eyes fluttering open to see him, a smile spread across your face. "hi jamie." you whispered.
"hi, love can you follow me please." he said sitting back up and running to the nearest window. "jamie, m'tired." you muttered, "i know, but it's really pretty, petal." his eyes drifting from the window to you. he watched as you sat up, whipping your eyes. you looked at james fast, before throwing the blanket off your warm body. you stood up stretching and walking to james. eyes slightly open and a yawn escaping your mouth. "look love, aren't they pretty tonight." he said making you look at the sky.
the stars shined bright above the other houses and trees. you could almost make out the constellations. "wow, they really are, jamie. they are beautiful." james stopped looking at the stars and started eyeing you up and down. "you are beautiful." he muttered quickly, making your head snap towards him. "jamie, i'm in pajamas." you said sarcastically, knowing he didn't care for those clothes. you could be covered in mud and he still wouldn't care. "so, does pajamas ruin your beauty? no. no it doesn't." he said before picking you up bridal style and throwing you on the bed. he planted a kiss against your lips before you moved to grab the blanket again. "ok, let's go to bed, petal." he watched as you got all comfy again.
"i love you, jamie" you said before turning to your side. "i love you too, petal good night." he said placing a kiss on your cheek before wrapping his arm around you.
notes: james potter owns my heart <3
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