Does She Talk Back Just So I’ll Punish Her? We’ll Never Know.

BDSM Links And Resources

I thought I would update the list of BDSM links and resources I posted a while ago, as some links were no longer working and I had several new ones to add, including a list of books. These should be particularly helpful to those who are new to BDSM and looking to explore D/s relationships, as the best way to go about that is to first read everything you can and then read even more! Not only will this allow you to educate yourself, help keep you safe and avoid any potential mistakes or regrets, but also the more you understand something, the less intimidating it will seem.

If you have anything to add, please don’t hesitate to let me know and I will update this list, in particular if there any books that a submissive might find helpful or informative, as most of the books I have read or included are intended for Dominants.

Note: For the sake of consistency and readability, I have used capitals throughout this document and have not used lower case when referring to submissives or slaves.

Websites:

Babygirls ‘n’ Daddy Doms: Website dedicated to littles, babygirls and Daddy Doms, with a lot of useful information on the subject.

Collarme: A free BDSM dating website and community, that is probably the most popular and a better option than the commercial alternatives.

DS Arts: Academy of DS Arts, fairly self explanatory.

Evil Monk: Ambrosio’s BDSM Website, featuring many useful articles.

Fetlife: An online BDSM community that I would highly recommend and which is perhaps best described as Facebook for the kinky, allowing users to create a profile, publish photos or writing and join interest groups where you can ask questions.

Kink Academy: An online resource with many educational and instructional videos on various aspects of BDSM, although users must pay a small fee to access all of the content.

Submissive Guide: As the name suggests, this is an online resource for submissives.

The Iron Gate: A general BDSM online resource, with many aticles, essays and even stories on the subject.

Dating and Relationships:

10 Principles For Healthy 24/7 D/s And M/s (Source: sexgeek.wordpress.com)

Difference of Dynamics in BDSM (Source: the-little-kitten.tumblr.com)

Finding Your Dominant (Source: asubmissivesjourney.com)

How To Find A Partner (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 3 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

So You Want Your Boyfriend To Dominate You (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

So Your Girlfriend Wants You To Dominate Her (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

The Unfortunate But Common Misconceptions About DD/lg Relationships (Source: a-lolitas-life.tumblr.com)

Play:

Consent Is Mandatory And Non-Negotiable (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

Food Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

How (and Why) To Go Down On Your Submissive (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

Initial Steps Into Orgasm on Command Training (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Rules and Tasks for Building Confidence (Source: themostdangerousplaything.tumblr.com)

Tools of Consent in BDSM (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Training in D/s - Why? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - How? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - Thoughts And Concerns (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Wax Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

Safety:

Basics Of Safe, Sane And Consensual Power Exchange (Source: Molly Devon / the-iron-gate.com)

Common Sense (Source: Sean R. Powell / the-iron-gate.com)

Emotional Safety (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Offline/Online BDSM Safety Rules (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Ouch Is Not A Safe Word: Safe Words, Limits, and Scene Protocol (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Rules For Meeting Strangers (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Safewords and Safesigns 101 (Source: kinkology.tumblr.com)

S.S.C. VS R.A.C.K. (Source: Justin Medlin / the-iron-gate.com)

Checklists, Communication and Negotiation:

BDSM Play Partner Check List (Source: Sovereign House / the-iron-gate.com)

BDSM Scene Negotiations (Source: daddyvinnie.tumblr.com)

Can I Get That In Writing: Basics of Negotiations (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Communication (Source: submissivesupportgroup.tumblr.com)

If I Ever See Another Checklist I Will Scream: An Extremely Thorough Play Checklist (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Negotiation Forms (Source: Jay Wiseman, SM 101: A Realistic Introduction / greenerypress.com)

What Are Negotiations Good For? (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare:

Aftercare for submissives (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Dominants (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Switches (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Emergency Self-Administered Aftercare (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Sub Drop (Source: David Williams / subshelpingsubs.tripod.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare (Source: desires-of-a-domimant-man.tumblr.com)

Dominance and Dominants:

A Dominant is NOT… (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dom (Source: Washington Sexuality University / the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dominant (Source: cherhatton.tumblr.com)

An Open Letter To A Novice Dom (Source: evilmonk.org)

Qualities of A Successful Dominant (Source: Polly Peachum / the-iron-gate.com)

Daddy Doms: They’re Not What You Think (Source: edenfantasys.com)

Domination for Nice Guys (Source: Franklin Veaux / the-iron-gate.com)

How To Spot A Non Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Learning To Be A Dom (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

The Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Daddy Dom? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

What Makes A Good Dominant (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

What Should A Dominant Be (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Submission and Submissives:

10 Considerations For Inexperienced Subs (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

A Submissive Bill of Rights (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Creed (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Ethics (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Introduction To Submission (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

Learning to Trust Your Instincts (Source: bewildbetruebekinkybeyou.tumblr.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts- Part 2: Submissives/Slaves (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Some Rules For The Submissive (Source: daddylookingforhisbaby.tumblr.com)

Submissive Owner’s Manual (Source: youmadememe.tumblr.com)

Ten Tips For The Novice, Heterosexual submissive Woman (Source: Jay Wiseman / the-iron-gate.com)

Warning Signs for Submissives (Source: RC Bauer / the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Babygirl? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

Books:

BDSM: The Naked Truth by Dr Charley Ferrer

Dear Raven and Joshua: Questions and Answers About Master/Slave Relationships by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Devil in the Details I: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - The Master, The Slave, The Power by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details II: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Mastery Refine: The Issues, The Skills by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details III: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Sustainable Structure and Traning by LT Morrison

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame, Gloria Brame and Jon Jacobs

Living M/s: A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan and Dawn Williams

Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony by Robert Rubel

Protocols: A Variety of Views by Robert Rubel

Real Service by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Phillp Miller and Molly Devon

SM101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

The Control Book by Peter Masters

The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren

The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino

This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM by Peter Masters

Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina Parker

This is how the slave welcomes his Mistress

Chastity police

The matriarchy had taken over the world, women were in power, there was no men in any position of power, men had to be accompanied by their woman at all times and locked in chastity, only allowed to unlock it with the permission of their partner. Women no longer got catcalled on the street, women now shouted ‘slut’ at any man not dressed properly. Proper dress for each gender had swapped, women wore suits and men wore dresses and skirts and shorts that accentuated their asses.

It was a very sudden change and I still hadn’t managed to find myself a girlfriend to protect me, I got called slut on the way to work everyday and the girls in the office teased me about being single. However, I was still unlocked, which was a big no no in society today, any man over the age of 18 was to be locked until they found a woman, when the rules changed I was 21, so I locked my cock for work and unlocked it when I got home, my keys locked in a safe so no one found out I was allowed to relieve myself.

Until one Saturday morning I got caught unlocked, I got a knock on the door and I opened it to find a police officer at the door, without hesitation she grabbed my cock through my shorts. ‘That’s not a cage, I’m going to need you to step back into the house and hold your hands up in the air’ I did as I was told, I’d heard the brutal stories of what happened to unlocked men, spikes, castrations, viagra prescriptions etc. ‘You may call me Quinn and I’m locking this door behind me, you’re very lucky I found you and not someone else, they would’ve kicked you in the balls until they turned to mush by now, I’m going to search your house and see how bad the situation is’ I stood there petrified but a little relieved I still had my balls in tact.

‘Ok good news, I can see that you clearly follow the rules to some extent but you just unlock yourself at home, correct?’ ‘Yes ma’am’ ‘You’re very lucky I found you today, go to your room with me and undress for me’ we walked upstairs and I changed out of my clothes. ‘See that cage is way too big for a cock that size, I’m going to lock you in my personal cage’ ~click~ ‘and the reason I’m doing that is because I’m also single, and I think you’re quite fit and I’m going to ask you to be my boyfriend’ I looked her up and down and wow, she was beautiful, this had turned out better than expected ‘yes I’ll be your boyfriend’ ‘brilliant! Oh my mum will be so relieved I’ve been single for way too long, I miss being hit on by guys but I love the femdom aspect of life right now’ ‘omg same, like I don’t mind getting hit on by girls but some of them have turned into monsters’ oh what a relief she was somewhat normal in today’s crazy world, what a Saturday!

Quinn then pushed me onto my bed, handcuffed me to the frame, lifted her skirt and sat on my new cage, which was bulging from the small size and the prospect of this gorgeous new girlfriend. Quinn wasn’t wearing panties and started sliding her wet pussy over my cage, ‘now we’ve got this all cleared up, I still need to punish you for being unlocked ok?’ ‘Yes ma’am I understand’ Quinn then shoved my bralette in my mouth to gag me and continued to tease my cage, I moaned in ecstasy as she rubbed it in all the right places and then tried to shove it in her pussy and fuck my cage.

After an hour of teasing she got up, ‘I found dildos in my search of your room, but there was nothing bigger than 5 inches, and we can’t be having that on my watch’ I looked down to see an 8 inch strapon as she covered it in lube. ‘I’m going to break your virginity with a bang, we’re not stopping until that cage squirts some cum’ my cock twitched with arousal and Quinn gave me a smirk as she strapped on the massive cock around her waist. She lifted up my legs and handcuffed them to the frame over my head so that I was folded almost in half, she then pushed the tip into my ass so that it adjusted to the size. ‘Just the tip!’ She joked before slamming her cock into my ass.

Quinn fucked me hard, I screamed in pain at first but she knew better, she kept applying lube and kept fucking me until soon I was moaning, god this felt good, the bed slammed into my wall as her pelvis slammed into my ass, she was going balls deep with every thrust. Sending waves of spasms up my arse, after an hour of solid fucking she pulled out, I let out a gasp and a moan ‘oh does your naughty ass miss my cock already?’ Quinn teased me, knowing I was her Bitch now and that this was the best thing that could’ve come out of getting caught, I nodded enthusiastically. Quinn uncuffed me from the bed and grabbed my balls, squeezing them just enough for me to know she won’t hesitate to squeeze harder, ‘I’ve uncuffed you because I want to change positions so you can enjoy this more, but know that if you take this opportunity to leave, I will call the police and they will likely chop your dick and balls off in the street, and then whip your ass until it bleeds for good measure’ ‘I promise you I will never leave, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me Quinn’ she was flattered and blushed as she said ‘well wasn’t that smooth, but adorable, now get on all fours I want to make your cage cum’

Quinn fucked me for the next 3 hours until I came, squirting it all over the bed, she made me lick it up and swallow, so that I knew my place. ‘Stay here I’ll be right back’ she left my house and walked to her car and came back with a bag, she tied a 9 inch vibrating dildo to the chair by the tv in the lounge and said ‘I’m going to go finish my patrol now, I want you to sit and watch tv on that dildo until I’m back, I’m going to go back to my flat after work and move out, your house is way nicer, got it babe?’ ‘Yes ma’am thank you ma’am’ ‘oh and you should call me Missy from now on’ ‘Yes Missy’ she smiled as I sat down on the huge cock that was now attached to my armchair.

Quinn left and after 5 hours she came back with all her stuff, I got up to help ‘uh uh, nope, your stay there sweetie I’m making some changes with this house I won’t be a second’ I waited another half hour for Quinn to come back, she let me leave the dildo and come upstairs to see what she’d done, my wardrobe was now full of her clothes and mine were laid on the bed, there was a range of dildos suctioned to the shower wall, there was chains attached the the posts of the bed, and above the bed there was a range of dildos hung above it, the one she’d used on my arse this morning was the 3rd out of 10, the largest being a 15 inch cock. I stared at it in terror ‘don’t worry babe we’ll work up to that one, now some of your lingerie and clothes are cute, but I want you to be sexy, so tomorrow we’re going shopping to get you some more stuff, and then probably throw this lot away’ I nodded in agreement, my clothes were considered conservative nowadays, I’d be wearing the garter and stockings, as well as the bra and panties I already wore, and probably some tighter clothing to show off my cage.

The week after Quinn moved in was a big wake up call, she didn’t make me cum again, instead I made her cum in every way imaginable, at work on Monday I showed up in my black satin pencil shirt, and a white silk blouse that showed off the red lingerie I was wearing underneath, the girls in my office wolf whistled and asked about my new woman, me and Quinn had devised a much harsher story than what actually happened and the office girls approved, congratulating me on finding a woman to put me in my place, before smacking my arse and sending me back to work. After work Quinn made me fuck her with the strapon most days so that I didn’t have to unlock my cage, I was getting used to chastity but the next Saturday Quinn had other plans.

I woke up on Saturday chained to the bed, my cock unlocked and fully erect, ‘morning Bitch, your cock is huge!’ ‘Thanks missy’ ‘now I’ve unlocked you just to see what’s it’s like but whilst we’re here..’ and she started stroking my cock, I was gagged and moaned in approval, she continued to stroke my cock until I was almost there, for about 30 minutes and then she stopped, pinching my cock so I couldn’t cum, she smiled a wicked smile at me, waiting for me to stop, and then continued stroking, Quinn continued this, edging me over and over again, the time between pinches quickly went from 30 minutes to 30 seconds, as I moaned through the gag, begging her to let me release.

After 3 hours of edging she let go, stood up, and walked out, my cock was purple at this point, fully erect and not showing any signs of calming down. As she walked back in it sprang back to attention, she had a pink silk ribbon and she tied it around my cock so tight that she knew I wouldn’t be able to cum but the blood would be trapped in my cock, keeping it erect, she then put a vibrating buttplug up my arse, hitting the sweet spot of my prostate, sending waves of pleasure up my body. I moaned in desperation as she left me there again, the next 4 hours was agony, I stayed on the verge of cumming but was unable to do anything, I could hear Quinn downstairs going about her day. When Quinn came back she took out the buttplug and untied my cock, and then iced my cock until it went soft, oh no, she’s not letting me cum she locking me back up, I looked at her pleadingly. ‘You should’ve known it was too good to be true, me finding you and not punishing you hard enough, I’ve edged you all day and I’m locking you back up until I do this again next week, you need to be punished and the this is the best way to do that, I’m not letting you cum until we’ve been together for a month, and even then I might change my mind’ she gave me a wicked smile as she took my gag out and unchained me. My cock was purple and swollen in its cage, the blue balls aching already, I was in for a frustrating month.

I feel like if I really applied myself I could be one half of a power couple. Power couples, to me, have a femdom tilt. That’s just how it is. And if you think that’s egotistical… look. I know what I want. I want a good boy who’s loyal, affectionate, and not afraid to be vulnerable with me. A boy who listens to my commands and actually wants to carry them out. A boy I can seek comfort in, who doesn’t make me feel annoyed and frustrated and on edge, like some people do. In return for all his good boy behavior I want to be able to take care of him, listen to him talk about his day, his hobbies and interests, just reciprocate everything. I want perfect balance. And, I want to take cute couples photos where you can tell I’m in charge, even if it’s subtle. Yes I’m smaller than him, but all it takes is one deliberate placement of my hand, or particular body language, and I think people might get a vibe. So um yeah.

150.

Tips welcome, if you like…

"HELLO MISS, ARE YOU MARRIED?!"

Subs who melt at the slightest shift of inflection in your voice. Subs who can't form sentences anymore because their dom made one teasing comment. Subs who talk big, but end up struggling to stay out of subspace the second they start getting direct attention. Beautiful, simply beautiful.