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Diaper Discipline Guide

Emma & Henry

My boyfriend of 4 years has always had regressive and sub tendencies while I’ve wanted to talk more control in our relationship. We tried several bdsm activities including smacking and bondage but the occasional nature wasn’t really doing it for me.

After finding out more online about Female Led Relationships I came across DD, initially dismissing it. But the more I read, the better and better the idea appealed to me. After some planning I decided to confront my partner and say I wanted to add an element of control and domination into our relationship, by saying I hadn’t decided how to do it yet we had a long discussion without diapers being mentioned where he agreed in principle to “lifestyle dominance” as long as it could be kept between them and not impact his job, friends, etc. 

This guide was invaluable to me to plan the rest and it solidified my decision. It took me two weeks to discreetly buy the required supplies, getting them delivered to our apartment on days he was at work. I decided that I wanted a high initial level of DD where he’d be in diapers 24/7 at home.

I decided to start on a Friday night after work. He’d known that I had been preparing for something and I started the conversation by saying my proposal was weird, reassuring him that it wouldn’t be painful/harmful and nobody else would find out but you wanted him to agree to try it for at least 6 weeks.

Although nervous he also seemed excited by the prospect and agreed. We moved to the bedroom where I told him to get undressed before I diapered him for the first time. There was a lot of objections at this stage but I talked him round and the agreement to try it for 6 weeks was helpful.

To make the shock less I started with a medical diaper which wasn’t too thick and let him wear his normal pjs over it. I left him to explore it on his own while going to make dinner. After dinner it was time to tell him all the rules, the main one was that the toilet at home was now banned and he’d be in diapers whenever he’s at home. I kept the baby elements to a minimum and said he’s have to also wear out the house sometimes but I’d make sure nobody could tell and never when he’s at work or with friends/family. I’m not going to lie and say this didn’t involve an argument, especially when he realised that no toilet meant #2 as well but we got through. We ended up watching a movie which was a good way for him to calm down.

He wet his diaper for the first time after the movie which was funny to watch as he was so nervous it was going to leak everywhere. Even though it wasn’t too wet I did change him straight away and made his change extra special too. That night he slept in a diaper for the first time.

Over the first weekend he did get more used to wearing and I allowed him to use the toilet for a bm on Saturday. Sunday however I decided to fully enforce the rules and he messed himself for the first time. I didn’t change him this time and he took a shower. There was a lot of protests again but I said it was none-negotiable. The smell did seem to be the biggest thing that bothered him so I bought some Devrom tablets which had been recommended, it took a few days for them to arrive and a few more of taking them but now his messy diapers hardly smell and the protests have stopped. I’d actually recommend you use these from day 1 to make the transition easier.

The first week was tough but we got through it and I’m happy to say we’re now 7 months in to him being in DD. Over that time I’ve moved to thicker abdl diapers, he wears onesies regularly around the house and the toilet has remained unused by him with only a few exceptions.

We both work mainly from home so I’ve gotten used to checking and changing his diaper but thick diapers + devrom has meant he generally only needs a change after waking up, sometime in the early afternoon and before bed. I’ll also let him change himself if I’m busy or cba. 

The best news is after an initial rocky patch, our relationship feels stronger than ever! He proposed to me 5 months in and I can’t see his DD ending any time soon. I’ve increased elements overtime and now the toilet is banned even when out of the house together. Public wearing did take him a while to get used to but actually it’s easy. 

I’m sure DD is not for everyone and is much more involved and hard work than other lifestyle changes but for creating a caring bond between you and your partner I’ve found it to be great!

Be honest. You only asked me for release so you could hear me deny it to you. NO.

Gone Too Soon

Of all the reasons to cry like the toddler she is, this is by far the most adorable.

A normal woman her age would cry about all the things she’s lost. Most adults don’t willingly give up every freedom and privilege that comes with adulthood.

And she has lost plenty of privileges over the years.

But she’s not crying because she has the potty training of a newborn. She doesn’t mind that she’ll helplessly fill every diaper I tape on her—or that she’ll never go a day without diapers again.

She’s not crying because her wardrobe can only be described as “Daycare Chic.” She enthusiastically traded her big girl clothes for onesies, frilly tutus, and an ever-growing collection of Bluey-branded outfits.

She’s not crying because everyone treats her like the overgrown toddler she is. She’s proud of her pamper packer status.

She’s not crying because her princess parts will never play outside of her thick, soggy diapers. A wet diaper and a cuddly stuffie are all the stimulation she needs.

She’s not even crying because she’s being sent to bed at 7:30–before the sun has even set. She’s exhausted from an eventful day of diaper changes, naps, and cartoons.

No, she’s not crying for any of the reasons you’d expect from an adult without any traces of adulthood.

She loves her new life. She belongs in her thick pampers, being talked down to by her former peers.

Which brings us to this adorable little tantrum.

My little cutie lost her favorite paci!

Well, not so much lost as destroyed. Our dog decided to take the paci for a test drive.

Poor baby. Her favorite binky gone too soon.

Now she’s overwhelmed without it to soothe her. And, of course, the pile of binkies on her bed just aren’t the same!

She only wants THAT binky!

It might sound trivial to an adult, but it should be clear that she’s not an adult.

For someone like her—with the emotional range of a toddler—it might as well be the end of the world. She’s not acting, either.

This is who she is.

Right now, she’s working through some “big feelings” over losing her binky with the only tool available to her.

Crying.

Whatever “big girl” faculties she once had are long gone. Neatly packaged away in a tiny box, stored in the deepest pit of her psyche. Or maybe she lost them the same way she lost her potty training—years of disuse.

I don’t know. And it doesn’t matter in the end.

All I know is that the advice in books for parents raising toddlers is the same as how to help the overwhelmed girl in front of me.

When she calms down, we’ll work through all her big feelings together. I’ll model proper emotional regulation for her while she tells me about her big feelings.

I’ll acknowledge and validate them, too. “It’s okay to be upset, honey. It’s not easy losing the things we love, is it?”

Then I'll pick up my sobbing babygirl and rest her in my arms, rocking her gently, assuring her that Daddy will always be here for her. Nothing calms her down faster than a loving embrace in my arms.

I am her safe space, after all.

After that, I’ll do my best to distract her from this Paci-Gate scandal.

It shouldn’t be too difficult—her attention span is about as advanced as her potty control. Plus, if I know anything about her, she’ll never turn down a baba of “chokkie milk.”

She’ll be asleep before she finishes her baba.

Like clockwork.

But unlike parents raising a tantruming toddler, my little one will never grow up.

No matter how often we practice regulating our “big feelings,” the lesson will never truly sink in.

She’ll never grow out of these tantrums.

And that’s okay—I wouldn’t have it any other way.

She’s my forever Babygirl. My perpetual toddler.

I couldn’t be happier.

Photo: Daddyiwantthis

“But that’s embarrassing—“

“Then embarrass yourself for me.”

Miss Anita isn’t exactly short, but there’s no harm in making you feel even smaller….is there? Especially when all that muck on her boots needs cleaning.