End Of The Road

End of the Road

“Okay, sweetie, Jen just got here to babysit you so I’m gonna head out. You behave, okay? I don’t want to hear you misbehaved tonight.”

I give her my best puppy dog eyes, begging her to stay.

“Awwww, stop!” she giggles, “Not the puppy eyes! How can I resist my little cutie when he gives me the puppy eyes in his cutest onesie?”

I smile—maybe she won’t leave after all. “Y-ou don’ hafta weave!” I say through my paci, laying on my cutest voice, “You can thtay here wif’ me!”

“I wish, cutie! But Mommy needs to have some big girl fun tonight. I love spending time with my little guy, but I have my own needs, too.”

I feel my body deflate. I hate the idea of her dating someone else. “I…I can do that!” I say in my best big boy voice.

“I don’t think so, silly! You’re far too little for such things. You’re right where you belong!”

“Am not! I did it before!” I argue.

“Yes, when you were pretending to be a big boy. But you’re not, are you?”

“I…I wasn’t pretending!”

“Oh? You weren’t? Because you haven’t acted like a big boy in six months!”

“Because you won’t let me!” I squeal, desperate and feeling my argument slipping away.

She laughs. “Honey, I don’t force you to fill your diaper. I don’t force you to suckle on your paci. I don’t force you to wear onesies. But you do all of those anyway!”

“Cause…cause you’ll punish me if I don’t!”

“Duh, little one. Littles don’t get to do big kid things. Adults—real adults—don’t beg their wife to put them in diapers and baby them. But you did!”

“I-I…I didn’t want it full time!”

“Yes you did, silly! You just didn’t know it. But I did. Mommies always know what’s best for their little one. This is who you are!”

“Is not!” I whine, feeling smaller than ever.

“Then why did you let this happen? You never fought for your ever-shrinking adult time! Why did you so happily surrender every adult privilege if you wanted to be an adult?”

“T-Thats not fair! I didn’t know you’d start dating other men and I wouldn’t ever have sex anymore!”

“Baby, look at me. What did you expect? That I wouldn’t lose all sexual attraction to you the first time you squatted down and load your diaper?”

Tears well in my eyes. “B-but…I.”

“But what? The only “but” I’m concerned about now is the one I wrapped in a clean diaper five minutes ago.”

“I can stop wearing them,” I sob, “I don’t need them!”

“Oh, little one, please don’t make this any more difficult than it has to be. This is who you are! You are my little. You belong in diapers. Your place is your nursery.”

“Nuh uh!” I sob, abandoning any pretext of adulthood.

“Yes, honey. Besides, do you really think you could go without them anymore?”

I hesitate, not wanting to know the answer. It has been months since I tried to make stinkies. They just happened now.

“I didn’t think so, sweetie. Now, can you drop all these big boy sex fantasies? You’re still my husband. I’ll always love you. But our relationship is just different. I’m your Mommy first and foremost.”

“B-but I still want to have…you know.”

“What did I just say, baby? No sex. Never again. Mommies don’t have sex with babies. Especially when their little ones are breastfeeding! And you’re back on the breast, which means your off sex.”

“Hmpff.”

“Huff all you want, little one. But I’m going out tonight and you’ll be all safe and sound in your crib, dreaming of our special moments in your nursery.”

I open my mouth to argue. She puts a finger on my mouth before I have the chance.

“Don’t. I’ll tell you what, little one. I have to leave in a half hour. Would you like to eat before I leave?”

I know I should say no. I should try to be an adult.

But I can’t.

“Y-yes pwease.”

“Good boy,” she says, taking off her dress and sitting down, adjusting my body and guiding my head to her nipple. “You just eat little one.”

I let her guide me, latching on immediately. Her bare skin feels warm and inviting. She rubs my back as I feed, humming a sweet melody.

Her other hand grabs at my diaper, checking it. Her fingers linger on my manhood. She giggles when she realizes.

“Such a silly boy. See, you do need my body, but not for your pleasure. You need it for your num-nums.”

I’m too out of it to understand what she’s saying. I don’t remember her getting up and tucking me into bed. Or Jen changing my diaper later that night.

Maybe Mommy was right, after all.