Fallen Down

Nothing will ruin your 20’s more than thinking you should have your life together already.

“We lose ourselves in books. We find ourselves there too.”

i was working an open day today, and a student helper went around all the stands and collected any trash anyone manning the stands had. she got to me, asked if i had any trash and i was like “not other than myself lol” and she was just like “you are the fourth person to make that joke in the last ten minutes, how is this the defining feature of our generation??” and if that’s not the real question idk what is

A Really Fucking Vulgar Guide to Not Losing Your Shit in College (Condensed Version)

Bitches love to put things into lists. Moreover, bitches love numbered shit. Here’s some numbered shit in list format to help you not suck in higher education. You’re welcome.

1. Go to class. Like 210% serious. I don’t give a shit if you’re a get by on nothing, A+ slacker. You’re fucking paying for this crap so you might as well get the services owed to you. Take your ass to class even if you zone out 99% of the time. You know 1% more than you did when you walked up in there. Congrats, asshole.

2. All that free time you have during your first week of classes? Make it your bitch. Don’t just print the goddamn syllabus and be like all done. No motherfucker. Take a good fucking look at that assignment list. What’s due next week? Yeah, do that shit now bc I know you don’t have anything else to do. Then when you’re coughing up a lung six weeks into the semester and don’t feel like getting your ass up to do that calculus homework, you’ll remember this week. You’ll remember that you’ve been a week ahead this whole damn semester. Pat yourself on the back, ass wipe.

3. Prepare yo self. No seriously. You got notes to print for class? Sure you could be like all those other bitches and just shove them into your backpack, or you could actually /prepare/ for class. I’m talking looking that shit over, identifying key concepts, getting a decent grasp of the material before your ass is even in class. You a STEM major? Yeah, make this kinda shit your life because now class is like one bomb ass group review session. Again, you’re welcome.

4. Snack like a motherfucker, but save that junk food shit for the weekends. From now on, you are a fucking health guru during the week or if you’re a slacker like me, at least on the days you have class. Fruits? Hell yeah. Pack some of those. Mind wandering in class? Snack on some apple slices. Can’t stay awake? Keep eating some almonds or some shit, but don’t be that bitch with the potato chips. Just don’t.

5. Read. Yeah, you heard me. Read and I’m not just talking assigned reading. I bet my left butt cheek that your campus library has /something/ of interest to you. Commuting and don’t want to drive out there? Library databases bro. We’re in the digital age, motherfucker. I’d bet my other butt cheek that the shit you want is in a nice little PDF somewhere. But na man, you thinking maybe you want to go into computer science? Check out computer science books and eat them up bro. You don’t like reading them? Probably not the field for you. You a biology major in your second year? Yeah dumbass. Time to break out the bio books and not the ones your professor is shoving in your face. Amaze your friends and teachers with your out of class knowledge. Be a fucking star.

READING TIME: 6.4 minutes 

Triumphant music playing. A wild Nandini jumps in front of the green-screen, donning a red cape, and strikes a Superman pose but is blinded by about a hundred ring lights being switched on.

“Andrew, MUST you ruin my cameos?”

The redhead cameraman rolls his eyes and defends himself, “Lighting is everything.” Nandini clicks her tongue, shields her eyes with the cape (yes, she’s now Red Riding Hood) and puts on an equally blinding smile towards the camera.

“Welcome to the Conquerors’ Causerie Podcast Station! Today, I’m SET to solve every student’s mystery: productivity after school. So, if you’ll please, conquerors, put on that pirate hat (because she’s indecisive and now wants to be Captain Hook), and tune that rusty radio to our channel. Let’s SAIL!”

*The wild Nandini hops onto a chair and brandishes the cape like a sword* AHOY MATEY! ALL FORWARD!

NOTE!

This is a complete system. Though it has worked tremendously well for me, it may not for you. I suggest trying this for a week, noting difficulties, and tuning the system accordingly for the future.

Since each step has been patiently explained, some of y'all might get lost in admiring the quality. For better educational retainment, I’ve included a summary of the system at the end.

Feel free to reply with ideas on improving this structure! Passengers of the Conqeranic (this ship ain’t sinking though) are always looking to better themselves!

➡ ✨ Lastly, about my taglist: I tag readers at the end of every article now, so they get notified when I upload (because Tumblr killed links). Details—if you wanna be included—are in the End Card.

Step ONE: Make a ONE TASK To-do at School.

Before getting home, decide on ONE task to work on. No, DON’T plan your entire schedule out. That’ll become a consuming task, and our mission here is to make this system as easy as possible for it to stick.

Get yourself one starting point— whether it’s a high-priority task (upcoming deadlines, assignments due tomorrow) OR a low-priority one (homework from your favourite subject, skimming couple pages of a novel). For me, it’s the commitment to write 2 paras for the latest article I’m planning. It ain’t school related, I admit, but it’s high-priority work for me, so it counts. For you, perhaps it’ll be to knock 5 problems off the weekly statistics problem set or finish 7 pages of reading for an upcoming lecture– everything works!

Whatever is it is, here are the two criterias:

Make it SPECIFIC (2 paragraphs, 5 problems, etc.)

Something that lasts 20-30 mins, because y'all will kill me if this torture goes on any longer.

Step TWO: Start When You Get Home.

THIS is where everyone goes wrong. You CANNOT let yourself slack when you get home. For the system to be a success, this is key! The star on the X-Mas tree! The daddy cherry on the daddy pie! (Edit: we need therapy. I know, sex therapy?? … yes I’m leaving)

If you need to, mentally prepare yourself for 30 mins of work as you’re coming back home. Just ½ an hour! You won’t die if you don’t eat or shower immediately, but your productivity sure will.

Soldier, understand. Here’s why: When you’re back home from school, you’re at your weakest. Temptation levels are at an all-time high and your brain’s like “Um HELLO CHILD? We already did 8 hours of shit school, time for vacation.” If you can overcome this, everything else will be smooth. Just do half an hour of work!

DON’T let yourself slack. Am I being a parental disaster here? Maybe. But just trust me, kiddos, and buckle up for one pomodoro session.

Step THREE: Bare Necessities

(I made a pun!) 30 mins of work done—the foundation for today’s success now laid—you’re allowed a nice 45 min chunk to indulge in the following 3 necessities, GO:

Shower!

Eat food!

Make a full to-do!

Fair warning: This ain’t fun time, so stop reading that smut in the bathroom. The aim of this quarter is to refresh & prime yourself for the marathon of hustle coming up (‘course it’s coming, why you surprised honey, this is team conquer) and not slack and fall into a rut. So dare I say it: WiFi isn’t allowed.

I sympathize with the entire population of Gen-Z wailing and unsubscribing, so here’s an alternative to protect your productivity— Switch off the WiFi. But keep a 20 min YouTube video and your favourite playlists downloaded. Use that instead.

Now quick, the clock’s ticking!

#1 Shower, repeat affirmations and twerk your booty while you’re at it.

#2 Eat food (and watch the downloaded video), preferably something healthy, and get right back to your Slay Station (sorry, ‘desk’ made me yawn).

#3 Lastly, schedule your day. Take 15 mins and plan out the next few work hours with exactly what you’ve gotta do.

That’s the student’s version of Eat, Pray, Love. (… when you plug self-help books for free, WHERE ARE MY SPONSORS)

Step FOUR: Soldier, Begin the March!

Now, warrior! You’ve must sit down at your desk, and face your biggest fears. Invest the next 2 hours in getting high quality, high priority work crossed off. For me, this usually turns out to be readings, prepping for upcoming exams and doing maths (I’m trying to turn math into a habit this year, and this turns out to be the perfect time to work without distractions).

Couple restrictions: (I know y'all wanna suffocate me with a smelly sock)

No WiFi. There’s no way you’re gonna get deep work done with you changing playlists every 5 mins, answering texts and fighting the urge to watch Netflix.

Work in chunks of 30-45 mins. In your breaks, move, read a physical book, draft a bit of an article on an offline notepad or watch a downloaded video.

Perhaps keep a mug of coffee nearby. Personally, I become a sloth during the afternoons (science, mom, it’s called an afternoon slump) and it’s an actual struggle to not fall asleep for the next 84 hours.

Step FIVE: Take A Mid-evening Break.

You’ve earned a major break! And so have I, because I’m writing this during mine! (Nobody cares but I’mma brag anyway.) Most folks prefer a lunch break, but please allow me to introduce— the Mid-Evening Break.

Here are the guidelines for a mid-evening break:

+ Allocate an entire hour (or 1½ hour, depending on how accomplished you feel).

+ Couple productive things to do, which might’ve slipped off your schedule due to an accumulation of work:

Drink a cup of tea and listen to a podcast. (I recommend Harry Potter and the Sacred texts, for it’s easy to digest and very entertaining)

Exercise! If you’re new to it, just throw in a couple squats, push-ups, mountain climbers etc, or just some stretching. Move that bod, amigo.

Read! When was the last time you read for fun? This is also a prime time to read valuable nonfiction, if you enjoy reading it.

+ Some fun things to do, to rejuvenate:

Watch videos from your Watch Later. If you let yourself scroll through cat video recommendations, you’re 10x more likely to start bingeing on meaningless crap. Your Watch Later hopefully has better videos, and that ish has been in the dust for ages anyway.

Plan out your next meal, and get yourself a snack!

Reply to messages/asks or talk to a friend.

Watch ONE Netflix episode. Harness that non-existent self-control, frendo.

Personal Example: Most days, I start off by writing a bit of a post, throw in a quick workout, and watch a few videos. I’ll end with checking socials and maybe replying to some messages.

Step SIX: Rinse and Repeat.

Round two! Obviously, don’t overworking yourself, but working on lighter projects for 1-2 hours after the break sounds cool. These include getting started on upcoming projects, working on a hobby, learning a skill, getting future readings for lectures done. Again, work in chunks, and take breaks as and when required.

Remember to stop working at a decent time, then go enjoy your entertainment without guilt! Also get to bed reasonably soon! Be kind, do good!

ALTERNATIVE:

If you’re not used to working in a strict schedule like this, which follows work work work (Riri be thriving), begin by following this for just one day per week (follow your current routine for the rest of it) and continue building on it.

This one helps me get enormous amounts of shit done, but it can get a bit extreme. Listen to yourself, and tune this accordingly. (For instance, when I’m exhausted, I’ll take my mid-evening break a bit earlier than usual to not die. Listen. To. Yourself.)

For Those Keeping Minutes, Here’s The Recap:

As you’re going back home, pick one task to start work on.

When you get back home, start work on it immediately. Spend just 20-30 mins on the task– creating your foundation for success.

Take 45 mins to do the three necessities next: shower, eat, and plan.

Hustle time! Focus, get deep work done. Knock down an essay, prep for an exam— work without distractions, and keep coffee near to fight the afternoon slump.

2 hrs later, take a mid-evening break! You’re finally allowed to use the WiFi! For the next hour, do whatever rejuvenates you. We stan healthy living.

Round two! Work for 2-3 hours again, this time on comparatively lighter projects (or that dreaded homework you’ve been procrastinating on, yikes)

Once you’re done, live your life! Party! Watch a movie! Dance, shake your booty! Brush yo teeth and get to bed on time.

:) Thanks for joining the Conquerors’ Causerie Podcast! Try this out— and lemme know how it goes, #team conquer, ayo. Productivity is a routine, it doesn’t magically happen one sunny day. So give this shit a try!

🌿 The End Card For Love & Plugging

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Have something to say? I treasure all feedback! If this post inspired you to do something, or you wanna throw some love/constructive criticism at me, hop into my ask box, or reply to this post itself!

Thanks for dropping by! New posts come out every Thursday, and so do my wins, journal entries, philo rants & photos of my plant babies throughout the week, so follow me if you’re into conquering life. I promise to be your loudest cheer woman. ✧

Sending you love and good energy, talk soon.

— Nandini 💌 (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

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Thank you to these folks for supporting my content! I love you, hope y'all are doing well. ⬇

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You’re unstoppable

Go study for your finals. Write that paper and finish that presentation. Study those flash cards. Stop procrastinating, have more trust in you and get off your phone. 

Just 62°F/17°C here and it feels already like autumn.

running a studyblr as an adult is so strange. i see kids as young as 13 having breakdowns about grades, isolating themselves from everyone because they don’t quite fit in, not knowing how to deal with very real mental health problems… it’s not my place as someone significantly older than you to try and intervene in your personal life, but i hope you all know that if you ever want advice - about studying, dealing with life, or just which colour to change your blog to - or need someone to listen to you when you’ve had an awful day, my inbox is always open. things will get better for you, and you will be okay, i promise.

hey high schoolers: your academic performance right now doesn’t have to be a predictor of your future success. just saying. 

i got Cs, Ds, and Fs in high school and dropped out. fast forward six years and i have an associate’s degree with honors, a 4.0 in a STEM major at an R1, i’ve worked in a lot of cool places, and i’m having the time of my life in my twenties. i still struggle, especially financially, but good things are happening that i couldn’t dream of when i was 16 and lonely in a world that would’ve seen me dead.

don’t let anyone tell you you’re going nowhere. you can do whatever you want. 

a reminder as we head into the new year :-)