Hold Your Line. Don’t Go Around Breaking Anyone Else’s.

Update: I bought drugs.

Pretty much.

Mood.

I’ve really needed to keep this in mind lately. 🥀

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

Honestly, this poem was the first that I became interested in. Before Lord Byron, I had no interest in poetry. It was something too lofty and impersonal for me to be captivated by. So, without further ado,

She Walks in Beauty

She walks in beauty, like the night 

Of cloudless climes and starry skies;

And all that’s best of dark and bright    

Meet in her aspect and her eyes;

Thus mellowed to that tender light    

Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,    

Had half impaired the nameless grace

Which waves in every raven tress,   

 Or softly lightens o’er her face;

Where thoughts serenely sweet express,    

How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,    

So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,

The smiles that win, the tints that glow,    

But tell of days in goodness spent,

A mind at peace with all below,    

A heart whose love is innocent.

I lied. You leaving me wasn’t okay and it will never be okay. But you lied to me too. You made promises to me that will never be kept. Those promises vanished into thin air just like how our forever did. When you left me, you took everything… They call me foolish for still loving you. For letting those three blissful words slip through my lips and into the dark lonely air longing to reach you. But how can I move on when you still have my heart and your voice still resonates throughout my body and your smile still lives in my eyes and every time my mind wanders it goes directly back to you. I still remember everything and my god I wish I could forget because maybe I wouldn’t hurt this bad. I still remember the sound of my crying breaking the unbearable silence as we sat there. I remember the way your hands felt on my cheeks as you wiped away my tears. I remember that look in your eyes and the way your voice sounded as you said you loved me for the last time… I miss you more than anything and it’s killing me… But if loving you kills me tonight, then I was ready for death the moment you said hello.

and suddenly all the love songs were about you  (via bittersweetperfectionn)

This is perfect

(via lezz-beann)

And I’d do it all over again.

(via rum-n-cunts)