Ponyboy Didn’t Cry At Johnny’s Funeral. He Wanted To, He Really Did, But He Couldn’t Make The Tears

Ponyboy didn’t cry at Johnny’s funeral. He wanted to, he really did, but he couldn’t make the tears come. He couldn’t feel anything, so he just looked at the grave in silence. He didn’t cry when he got home either. He just sat down in front of the shitty TV and watched whatever cartoon was on. He wanted to feel so badly. He wanted to be mad. He wanted to scream or sob but nothing would come. He was numb.

He went on like that for two weeks. He went on like that until Darrel pushed too hard and then he yelled. He yelled but he still barely felt. He didn’t truly feel until Johnny’s clothes were in his arms. He didn’t feel until he could still smell the smoke and grease and dirt that was so distinctly Johnny still clinging to the fabric. And the minute he felt, he wished it would go away. Because the grief and despair came over him like a tidal wave. He thought he couldn’t possibly still feel his heart break after his parents died, but smelling Johnny and holding his rough jacket, his heart shattered. Suddenly he was burying his face in Johnny’s stuff and gasping for air as sobs wracked his entire body.

It got a little better when he read Johnny’s letter. It got a little better when he started opening up to his brothers. It started getting better when he started feeling a little more ok. But then the one year anniversary came around and suddenly he was plunged back into his pure and unfiltered grief.

He spent the entire morning sitting on his couch, the rest of the gang, or what was left of it, there too. He thought he’d be ok, maybe he’d visit Johnny’s grave and talk to him, or read the letter again. But when he read the letter, the blood drained from his face as he realized that he no longer perfectly remembered Johnny’s voice. He sucked in air when he realized before immediately curling into Darrel and clasping a hand over his mouth to stop the loud sob from escaping. He spent the rest of the day like that, held by his brothers, Soda rubbing his back and Darrel quietly whispering out “I know, baby, I’m so sorry”. He could barely feel Soda’s touch or hear Darrel’s comfort over the ringing in his ears as he kept his eyes squeezed shut, trying to remember every mark on Johnny’s body and the way his laugh sounded and the way his hand felt, his cries getting more intense whenever he couldn’t recall the details. Because his best friend was fading away and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

MBTI Type: ESTP [The Entrepreneur]

ESTP types like being around large groups of people, whether they know them or not. They prefer being out in action to being at home by themselves.

They are very observant and detail-oriented people. They are practical and realistic, focusing on the here-and-now.

Entrepreneurs make decisions based in logic. They care more about following the truth than making other people happy.

They avoid schedules, preferring to make plans as they go. They have less aware of time and enjoy being adaptable.

Big Three: Aries Sun, Leo Moon and Aries Rising

Aries Sun: The first sign of the zodiac, Aries is ruled by action planet Mars. When placed as the sun sign, the ram can motivate themselves to face on fears and blow past hesitation.

Leo Moon: Possessing a wellspring of inner warmth, Leo Moons are beyond generous. As an act of love, they’ll shine their light onto those they care about.

Aries Rising: Aries ascendants are known as the go-getters of the zodiac. They don’t let anything stand in their way of achieving their personal goals.

Enneagram Type: 8w7 [The Nonconformist]

Basic Fear: Eight with a seven wing fear being controlled by others. They dislike authority and prefer to work alone.

Basic Desire: Their basic desire is to remain in control of their own lives. They also want other people to be free, and are often advocates for those less able.

Nonconformists defend themselves by denying vulnerability. They don’t want to appear weak and therefore avoid situations that may leave them exposed or defenseless.

Moral Alignment Type: Chaotic Good [The Rebel]

These characters value freedom and kindness, often challenging laws and order to achieve just outcomes.

Dallas Winston's MBTI Type, Big Three, Enneagram Type and Moral Alignment Type

Haii!! I Really Love Ur Account & Analyses (plural Of Analysis I Think) And I Hope It's Not Too Much

MBTI Type: ESTP [The Entrepreneur]

ESTP types like being around large groups of people, whether they know them or not. They prefer being out in action to being at home by themselves.

They are very observant and detail-oriented people. They are practical and realistic, focusing on the here-and-now.

Entrepreneurs make decisions based in logic. They care more about following the truth than making other people happy.

They avoid schedules, preferring to make plans as they go. They have less aware of time and enjoy being adaptable.

Big Three: Scorpio Sun, Leo Moon and Aries Rising

Scorpio Sun: Ruled by Mars and Pluto, the Scorpio Sun is known to be intense, mysterious, and ever-evolving.

Leo Moon: Possessing a wellspring of inner warmth, Leo Moons are beyond generous. As an act of love, they’ll shine their light onto those they care about.

Aries Rising: Aries ascendants are known as the go-getters of the zodiac. They don’t let anything stand in their way of achieving their personal goals.

Enneagram Type: 8w7 [The Nonconformist]

Basic Fear: Eight with a seven wing fear being controlled by others. They dislike authority and prefer to work alone.

Basic Desire: Their basic desire is to remain in control of their own lives. They also want other people to be free, and are often advocates for those less able.

Nonconformists defend themselves by denying vulnerability. They don’t want to appear weak and therefore avoid situations that may leave them exposed or defenseless.

Moral Alignment Type: Chaotic Neutral [The Free Spirit]

Free from societal constraints, these characters prioritize their own freedom and make choices based on their whims.

Rusty James' MBTI Type, Big Three, Enneagram Type and Moral Alignment Type

MBTI Type: ESFP [The Entertainer]

ESFPs are very outgoing and lively people. They thrive in groups and prefer not to spend too much time alone.

They are very observant, focusing closely on the details rather than the grand scheme. They think in terms of the present.

Entertainers tend to prioritize emotion when making decisions, concerning themselves more with how their decisions will affect others. They are empathetic and diplomatic.

They rely more on opportunity than rigid scheduling. They are spontaneous and playful people, with a passion for finding new adventures.

Big Three: Aries Sun, Leo Moon and Aries Rising

Aries Sun: The first sign of the zodiac, Aries is ruled by action planet Mars. When placed as the sun sign, the ram can motivate themselves to face on fears and blow past hesitation.

Leo Moon: Possessing a wellspring of inner warmth, Leo Moons are beyond generous. As an act of love, they’ll shine their light onto those they care about.

Aries Rising: Aries ascendants are known as the go-getters of the zodiac. They don’t let anything stand in their way of achieving their personal goals.

Enneagram Type: 7w6 [The Pathfinder]

Basic Fear: Sevens with a six wing have a deeply-rooted fear of missing out. They want to be trustworthy and honor commitments, but they also want to leave room to allow for last-minute opportunities.

Basic Desire: Their basic desire is to feel fulfilled and happy. They express this by searching for joy in every small thing that comes their way.

Pathfinders defend themselves by rationalizing away negative feelings. They unconsciously convince themselves that they are happy, even when they are not.

Moral Alignment Type: Chaotic Neutral [The Free Spirit]

Free from societal constraints, these characters prioritize their own freedom and make choices based on their whims.

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dolliemarionette

3 months ago

981 notes View Post

dolliemarionette

3 months ago

Omg wow that man on your pfp is the sweetest looking!!

that man is matt dillon hes my baby daddy

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dolliemarionette

2 months ago

Hi there, I hope you’re doing well. I recently shared my story about the challenges my family and I face in Gaza and would be so grateful if you could help by reblogging it. Every share brings more awareness and support, and if you’re able to donate, even a little makes a huge difference. Thank you for caring and for any help you can offer. Momen

cant donate but to anyone seeing this: reblog

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