lying (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 36 years ago
lying (undershooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 7 years ago
lying by a ridiculous amount (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 900 years ago
lying by a ridiculous amount (undershooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 15 minutes ago
real date of event no one reading was alive for: feel old yet? the great san francisco earthquake happened 118 years ago
real date of event no one reading was alive for or cares about: feel old yet? prince frederick henry died 395 years ago
event no one reading was alive for and also lying: feel old yet? the great san francisco earthquake happened 4 years ago
event that did not happen: feel old yet? brian mulroney was assassinated 48 years ago
event that did not happen and even if it did this would be a lie: feel old yet? brian mulroney was assassinated 197 years ago
real date of event on a cosmological scale: feel old yet? the sun was formed 4,600,000,000 years ago
lying on a cosmological scale (undershooting): feel old yet? the sun was formed 12 years ago
lying on a cosmological scale (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 12,000,000,000 years ago
real date of a personal anecdote that only you know or card about: feel old yet? i made a really good stir fry 5 years ago
reversal: feel young yet? frozen 3 is coming out in 3 years
reversal on a cosmological scale: feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 8,000,000,000 years
reversal (lying about event): feel young yet? the first episode of spongebob will air in 3 years
reversal (lying about time, overshooting): feel young yet? frozen 3 is coming out in 8,000,000,000 years
reversal (lying about time, undershooting): feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 3 years
reversal (lying about time, really undershooting): feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 12 minutes
real date of a recurring event that wasn't very long ago: feel old yet? halloween was 13 days ago
lying about recurring event: feel old yet? halloween was 10,000 years ago
reversal of recurring event: feel young yet? thursday is tomorrow
reversal of personal anecdote: feel young yet? my laundry is done in 52 minutes
real(?) date of a nonspecific event: feel old yet? something happened 2 years ago
lying about the reader (undershooting): feel old yet? you were born 5 years ago
lying about the reader (overshooting): feel old yet? you were born 650 years ago
making a reasonable guess about the reader: feel old yet? you were born 22 years ago
technically telling the truth about the reader: feel old yet? you were born between 0 and 120 years ago
threatening the reader: feel young yet? you will die in 7 days
non sequitur: feel old yet? half of all chameleon species on earth live in madagascar
non sequitur (lying): feel old yet? chameleons are immune to fire
lying on several levels: feel old yet? chameleons were invented 36 years ago
self-reference: feel old yet? i started writing this post 40 minutes ago
giving up: feel old yyet?th e emmenkr,tn dbw a 8 gn m hk\
i can't finish the joke someone else come up with a punchline: feel old yet?
declarative statement: you feel old.
subversive declarative statement: time isn't even real.
reference another meme: feel old yet? yeah. this is the beach that makes you old.
reference another meme specifically about injecting non sequiturs into long posts: feel old yet? the glue that lets you walk up and down anything was invented 36 years ago
autism is not a horrible disease that ruins lives and tears apart families. elon musk, who is autistic and an evil billionaire who doesn't pay taxes, has ruined thousands of lives, and whose family hates him, is a statistical outlier adn should not have been counted
remember kids
Artist 🎨: @vhsdogs
inspired by the scariest words my dm has ever said to me and the subsequent coolest (AND SCARIEST) scene of my life
If you want to lament, click on the "Lament" tab. Customize your wailing, writhing, and babbling, to make each lamentation a unique experience.
Fuck it. Today i'm getting over my mental health issues
Me: Why tf does my back always hurt?
Also me:
The “average autistic person pays zero taxes” factoid is actually a statistical error. The average autistic person actually pays over ten thousand dollars in taxes per year. Emerald Mine Elon, who is a billionaire and regularly commits tax evasion, is an outlier and should not have been counted.
Hey everyone, my name is Abdelmajed. I don’t usually talk much about myself, but today, I want to share a little piece of my story.
I was born and raised in Gaza, a place that has always been my home 🏡. I grew up surrounded by my family, my friends, and the streets that I knew like the back of my hand. Life wasn’t always easy, but we had love, laughter, and dreams. I used to think that no matter what happened, home would always be here. But life has a way of changing things in ways we never expect.
Over the past months, everything I once knew has disappeared. The streets that were once filled with children playing are now silent. The houses that held so many memories are now just rubble. And the people I loved—some of them are gone forever. 💔
any pronouns \ early 20s \ genderfluid/transfem \ physics student \ trying not to succumb to the horrors.
240 posts