That Fucker…

ungh yeah sex so good [Holds finger to earpiece] hold on [............] the president was just assassinated

God, anyone who is happier than me should perish

Me: *goes to friends house*

Friend: Hey, this is my place, whadda ya think?

Me: where’s the pee sock

Friend: …

Me: …

Friend: I thought you’d never ask!

>have adhd

>look for possible medications

>first article I click on

RIP(p)

reblog to say RIP to penis

update:

you are not letting go of the spoon oh god oh fuck

@biggest-gaudiest-patronuses i accidentally made you out of expired food.

I am in tears

I think next thursday is gonna be the best day of my entire life tbh