:]

You were sending me signals this whole time… But it took me so long to realize… I actually also think it's amazing when someone works so hard they're all beat up. I can't take the place of the League of Villains, but I thought I needed to tell you how wonderful your smile was.

Before starting T, when I socially transitionned, I was surrounded by radical feminists who saw masculinity as gross and inherently evil, something to avoid, something to make fun of, something to destroy. The other transmascs in my friend group, sometimes, told me that they didn’t knew if they really were non-binary or if they just were scared shitless of saying “I am a man”. Because they saw this as a betrayal to their younger self who had been SAd and abused.

I saw many of my masc friends and trans men around me hate themselves, not outing themselves as men because it would imply so so much, it was like opening the Pandora Box. Even when we were just together, talking about our masculinity was always coated with bits like “I know we’re the privileged ones but…”, “I don’t want to sound like I have it bad but…”, “Women obviously have it worse, but last time…” and we were talking about terrible traumas we experienced while taking all the precautions in the world in the case the walls were a crowd of people in disguise waiting to get us if we didn’t downplay the violence we faced, or like crying and being upset and being traumatized and afraid and scared and to say it out loud would make us throw up the needles we were forced to swallow every second of every day living in our skin.

Most of us weren’t on T yet, some of us were catcalled every day and harassed in the streets or in abusive relationships nobody seemed to care to help them get out of because they were “strong enough” to do it by themselves.

I was using the gender swap face app and cried for ours when I saw my father looking back at me through the screen. The idea of transforming, of shedding into a body that would deprive me of love, tenderness, and safety, was absolutely terrifying. I knew I couldn’t stay in this body any longer because it wasn’t mine, but I also knew that if I was going to look like my dad, my brother, my abusers, it would be so much worse.

5 years later and I’m almost 2 years on T, and almost 2 months post top surgery.

I ditched my previous group of friends. I was bullied out of my local trans community. But let me tell you how free I am.

I was scared that T would break my singing voice: it made it sound more alive than ever.

I was scared that T would make me less attractive: it made me find myself hot for the first time in my life.

I was scared that T would make me gain weight: it did. But the weight I put on is not the weight I used to put on by binging and eating my body until I forgot that it even existed. It’s the weight of my body belonging to me, little by little. The wolf hunger for life.

I won’t tell you the same story I see everywhere, the one that goes “I started going to the gym 8 times a week, I put on some muscles, I started a diet and now I look like an action film actor”, in fact if you took pictures of me from 5 years ago vs now I’d just have more acne, I’d have longer hair and still look like I don’t know what to do with myself when I take selfies.

But the sparkle in my eyes, my smile, tell the whole story way better than this long ass stream of words could ever.

I want to say some things that I wish someone told me before starting medically transitionning.

It’s okay to take your time. It’s your body, it’s your journey, if you don’t feel comfortable taking full doses and want to go slow, the only voice you need to listen to is your own. Do what feels right.

If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break, it’s okay to ask for support.

Trans people are holy. Everyone is. You didn’t lose your angel wings when you came out because you want to be masculine. You are not excluded from the joy of existence, from being proud of yourself, from being sad, from being scared, from being angry. The emotions and feelings you allowed yourself to feel while processing what you experienced when you grew up as a girl and was seen as a woman are still as valid as before. Nobody can take that from you. If someone tries to, don’t let them.

It’s perfectly normal to grieve some things you were and had before you started to transition, like your high soprano voice or even your chest. Hatching is painful. You can find comfort in things that don’t feel right, so making the decision to change can be incredibly scary and weird and you deserve to be heard and supported through this. Wanting top surgery doesn’t make the surgery less intense, less terrifying, less painful to recover from. When it becomes too much you have the right to take a break and take some deep breaths before going on.

You don’t have to have a radical, 180° change for your transition to be acceptable or valid or worthy of praise. Look at how far you’ve come already. It doesn’t have to show, you’re not made to be a spectacle, you’re human and it is your journey.

Oh, and last thing, you know when some people say “Oh this trans person has to grow out of the cringy phase where you think that you can write essays about being trans or transitionning or just their experience because it’s weird” ? If you ever hear this or see this online, remember all the people whose writing you read and, even if they were not professional writers, helped you more than any theorists did ? If you want to write, do it. It won’t be a waste. It can help people. Or it won’t, and even then, if it helped you, that’s enough.

Love every of my trans siblings, take care of yourselves. You deserve the world.

Post sports festival Shouto

Original tiktok:

tumblr just deleted a huge swathe of palestinians who were on here trying to fundraise. if you've been helping any of these fundraisers please take this time to 1) check in with palestinians you're in contact with 2) help them submit support requests if needed 3) keep these campaigns circulating while the beneficiaries are being silenced. these campaigns are life or death, this isn't just social networking. do not let these fundraisers languish.

i wish class a vs deku was izuku vs shoto part 2

Todoroki Shouto ☆ Boku no Hero Academia ep. 146

thank you everyone for addressing concerns to your representatives because it works and for now we have a free and open internet!!!

(they'll definitely bring this shit up and revive it yet again but for now we can celebrate)

Himiko Toga being queer is only implied/heavily headcannoned, nothing is ever specifically stated in the manga, anime, or movies

Update on my friend Amani from Gaza! Things are getting very dire and she has asked me once again to relay her story to you in the hopes that you will be able to help her and her family.

Amani is a 32 year old mother of 3 boys. Originally from the north of Gaza, their home was completely taken away from them by Israeli bombardment and they were forced to evacuate to the south.

Currently, Amani's family has had to evacuate 5 times and is forced to live in a tent with even the barest necessities unavailable to them. Her children are deprived of nutritious food and clean water as well as medicine and healthcare. And everyday they are at risk of losing their lives whether it is to illness or to the Israeli heavy artillery.

(ID in Alt)

Amani needs to evacuate herself and her children across the Rafah border. She is asking for $17,732 and has gotten very few donations so far!

Please help Amani get her boys to safety and out of harm's way! Every moment they spend in Gaza their life is at risk and the trauma they gain is lifelong. Donate what you can and please make sure you share!

gofundme.com

Donate to Support Amani and her children to rebuild their lives, organized by Hadi Abudaya

Hi, my name is Hadi and here is another family member who is in nee… Hadi Abudaya needs your support for Support Amani and her children to r

korean-japanese women yuri is trending on twitter because korean and japanese women don't like the men in their respective countries they're making yuri about korean women and japanese women dating each other wow what a time to be alive