I See A Picture Of These Two Threatening Each Other In A Dance, They Are Dancing A Waltz Or Another Dance.

I admit that Edward's mask is terrible to draw

I also like to draw him without a mask. HE'S SO CUTE

Was Edward like the others at the orphanage, an orderly? I suggest that he was brought there as a baby, and probably doesn't remember his parents. And the jar of hearts... it was probably given to him for one of his birthdays. He just wakes up one day and there's a jar of hearts on the table or under the door, and a letter next to it.

Did he work to become the manager? Or did they make concessions to him?

You know, it's probably worth drawing...

Imagine a dark large room on the floor, an altar on which light falls in a thin column and two figures next to it: one a head lower, and the other higher. And so, they kiss... This kiss is unremarkable and not full of love, but... it still takes place

I'm sorry bit I just love the idea of Poor Edward thinking he's hot shit with his creepy gifts and deranged letters, then here comes Samuel who's even more fucked up than him, looking for some homoerotic stabbing while Edward cries. Baby faced loser just cannot handle an experienced freak.

LAKSJDFLASEKJES INCREDIBLE ASK TO RECEIVE, THANK YOU

but okay listen I think they're on different freaky axes. Stalking, sending someone your skin in the mail, getting possessive and jealous enough to kidnap their baby, those are all ROMANTIC freak activities. Samuel did not get the skin and go "pff, amateur, get on my level," LIKE HE WAS PRETTY DISTURBED TO GET EDWARDS SKIN IN THE MAIL. and then Sam is not really romantically inclined, he is just SEXUALLY freaky (calling him an "experienced freak" absolutely delights me but I don't know if this is true, he DOES like homoerotic stabbing but hes still a confused and repressed Victorian gentleman) while Edward simply does not seem to be sexually inclined at all?? TBH I pretty strongly headcanon him as asexual just based on how he handles love and marriage... So they're just on different tracks.

BUT HONESTLY?? IM NOT EVEN SURE THATS THE ISSUE. gets fully sidetracked with my Poor Edward Is A Kinky Ace headcanons

Thoughts & Evidence: - pain/injury: top - he "dislikes butchery" and seems to have a flair for causing psychological terror over simple murder, but causing people real tangible pain is the one thing he truly misses in his happiest ending. - restraint/confinement: switch - hes SO fixated on the coffin thing but ALSO in That One Very Normal Silverer Option hes fine playing along when YOU restrain HIM, it's only when you threaten to murder him that he actually freaks out - control; dom/sub: bottom - this never occurred to me during the ambition but makes a lot of sense in retrospect... he wants a master to pledge himself to and he's not sure if you're going to take that slot or not so he flips back and forth between pitching himself as a loyal henchman and a sadistic tormentor as he tries to capture your affection. But the only way to actually be with him is to fully take control, to essentially tell him "new plan: i do whatever I want, and you lock yourself in this building until I get back <3" and he's SO HAPPY TO DO IT.

All this to say that like, there's a couple of actual obstacles here, but neither of them are "erotic stabbing is too much for Edward." HE just doesn't wanna get murdered! BUT LIKE THATS PERFECTLY COMPATIBLE, SAMUEL IS ON BOARD FOR BEING THE GUY GETTING LOVINGLY MURDERED!!!!

I strongly suspect the actual obstacles here are: (a) Sam is too much of a bottom to be Poor Edward's master but also (b) Poor Edward is chemically impaired. In the whole first chunk of Light Fingers he's grabbing you constantly, easily overpowers you, and has NO PROBLEMS inflicting death as long as it's not permanent, but after the moon-milk he NEVER TOUCHES YOU AGAIN unless/until you actually consent to the wedding. THIS IS A FASCINATING DETAIL TO ME. He's clearly frustrated with you at points and trying to force your hand, and he doesn't seem to mind you getting hurt in the Nightmare-Orphanage when he's not the one doing it; can he just not bear to attack you himself????? ARE HE AND SAMUEL BOTH EQUALLY FRUSTRATED BY HIS INABILITY TO JUST FIGHT SAM

This is a Russian doll that was custom made for Edward. It's one of his gifts, as you know!

i cant believe how long it took me to think to afflict Poor Edward with hanahaki. He already has the "I'll die without the affection of the person I'm in love with" part, why not also violently cough up flowers!!!

I figure most websites with big lists of flower meanings should probably be taken with a grain of salt, but this one was just too compelling to resist:

Anyway I personally think he would (a) not hesitate to tell you that he has hanahaki disease because of you and therefore you have to love him back, (b) send you flowers he coughed up as a romantic gift & write you poetry about the sensation of flowers filling his lungs, and (c) WORK VERY HARD TO NEVER SHOW SYMPTOMS IN YOUR PRESENCE.

I have a new very strange thought... Can Ed sing in the shower?))) I have seen theories that while we are starting a riot/fire, Edward is just sleeping and then runs out in his pajamas, but in my version, he was just washing himself in the middle of the night, and then the only thing he managed to wear was a robe. Oh, poor thing, he didn’t even have time to dry off! He was probably cold...

These eyes will look at you for the rest of your life👀

It's just little Eddie boy

his gaze scares me

I imagine you are surrounded by your lovers. Haha, I don't think Edward has the strength to be around since seven! Although he will be able to find time for everyone. If they all lived in the same house, it seems to me that the easiest way to avoid cleaning it would be to just move on. I wouldn't want to be a neighbor'''''''''

MOON MILK OVERLOAD

AKA, I found a cute redraw your ship as this and realized I had a hilarious opportunity on my hand.

Let's just be thankful Edward doesn't have to deal with this many PCs at once. Otherwise he would indeed be Poor Edward. I don't think he'd survive.

Clockwise from top left;

Sawyer Wolff, The Snake-Oil Deacon - @anannoyanceofjackofsmiles Alex Hastings, The Vitriolic Thief - @thedeafprophet Dr. Tomas Müller, The Bandaged Thanatologist - @theunluckiestdevil (on my hands and knees apologizing, I haven't learned how to draw graying or slicked hair yet) Anne Meredeith, The Disfigured Captain - @milleart H. Reisz, The Twilight Phantom - @szilverer (sorry to put you at the bottom, the cloak made Reisz easy to recognize from the back) Emery Ender, The Well-Intentioned Thief - Me! Samuel Ashman, The Bloodstained Deacon - @shazzbaa

Happy early Valentine's Day to you all! Sorry to everyone I didn't include.

OG image below