When will reqs be open?
They are open rn!! Until I say otherwise:)
Your last band Ellie fic was tooo good can you do rockstar Ellie with karma by raue
Karma - (ellie williams x reader)
Hi anon thanks for the compliment! firstly this song fucking slaps??? hello???? off topic but rockstar Ellie would be so hot too, like??? I hope you enjoy <3
This story is based off the song Karma by Raue, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading! This song is about betrayal, so I did not follow the lyric 100% but the overall message is the same:)
Pairing: ellie x fem!reader
requests are always open, feel free to leave one:)
Warnings: betrayal
Summary: In which you were her downfall
Authors note: It took be fucking forever to get this out because tumblr was not posting my shit but here it finally is! Remember you are loved an to always be kind <3
Ellie groaned as she saw the pictures of you and Abby Anderson.
Take your time
Do you remember all the things you said
Before I took what’s mine
Fear grows with time
It’s hard to believe all the things you did
While blurring out the line
Out of all the people Abby fucking Anderson. Her biggest rival.
"It'll make you feel worse if you keep looking at it" she heard Jesse talk from behind her.
All Ellie could do was throw her phone to the side.
"I know this I hard" Jesse started but before he could finish there was a knock on her dressing room door.
"Are you naked Williams?" she heard Dina yell from the other side.
"It's time for makeup"
"Yeah, yeah let her come in" Ellie sighed.
She heard Jesse chucked before she saw him get up.
"Try to forget about her, ok?" was all he said before he walked out.
Ellie looked at her self in the mirror for a while. She couldn't even recognize herself anymore. She went from a sweet an innocent girl to almost every parents nightmare.
She was covered in tattoos, her lips and tongue pierced. Once she had long hair, but it was cut short. She wore a black wife beater with a leather jacket and tight leather pants. Her neck was decorated with tattoos and chains.
Maybe getting all these tattoos was a good idea, it made her look cooler. It goes with her image.
Joel says it was a bad idea, that she would regret it one day. But she looks so fucking badass she tends to ignore his complaints.
The door soon opened and Dina walked in with her make up kit, practically running to Ellie.
"Fuck, fuck I'm late! I'm late! Maria's gonna kill me"
"Dina chill it's only some eyeliner"
"and foundation" she yelled dramatically as she zipped open her bag and started drawing Ellie's eyeliner on.
It was quiet, peaceful.
Too quiet for a rock show.
In the past Ellie performed in front of millions. She remembered how she almost went deaf because of how loud the crowd was screaming for her.
There were times she couldn't even walk in public alone without hundreds of people running after her. People begged her online to sell her used underwear at some point.
Ellie dominated the music industry with her unique rock style and unique lyrics.
She was a legend.
But now she was a nothing.
No one knew of the famous Ellie Williams anymore.
And it was all your fucking fault. You took that away from her.
The peaceful environment Ellie and Dina sat in was soon disrupted when Maria walked into the room whistling.
Ellie rolled her eyes.
"You look hot" Maria commented as she looked at Ellie through the mirror.
"You did good" Dina she added.
A smile appeared on her face "thank you" she beamed.
"I would've done something better but I was late"
"It's ok… now can you give Ellie and I some time alone"
All Dina did was nod as she started packing up her stuff.
Ellie looked herself in the mirror and she agreed. She looked fucking hot. She hoped that maybe tonight might be her comeback.
She looked good, she felt good and excited. Maybe people would still like her.
Ellie was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard the door close. It was just her and Maria left in the room.
"Ok look, you barley made any sales-"
"you don't think I fucking know that?" Ellie snapped.
"Getting mad at me won't do anything Ellie"
"you're my fucking manager do something!"
Maria sighed.
"Listen Ellie everyone is buying Andersons album-"
"then do something about it! put me on billboards, make my shit cheaper!"
The room was filed with silence, before Ellie spoke up again: "Maria I can't lose my career"
"I can't lose to her and Anderson" Ellie muttered as she looked down to the ground. defeated.
"Ellie you aren't making money anymore, nobody is buying tickets, you can't pay your staff… I think it's time to give up"
Hot tears filled Ellies eyes. She couldn't lose this. Her music was the only thing keeping her sane.
"If it wasn't for your ex girl maybe-"
But before Maria could finish Ellie got up from her chair and she walked towards her.
If looks could kill, Maria would be dead right now.
"Don't you ever talk about her again. She's fucking dead to me" Ellie said through gritted teeth.
Maria took a step back, afraid that Ellie would hit her.
"Ellie it's ok to be mad at her- but you need to stop holding this grudge. It's bad for you and your career"
Ellie looked to floor. Maybe Maria was right.
"Ellie I'm sorry-" she didn't even bother to stay and listen.
"if you stopped thinking about what she did, maybe you'd be able to save your career"
Ellies eyes widened, and her jaw dropped at what Maria said.
All Ellie did was grab her electric guitar and she walked out the room.
What Maria said hurt her. Ellie loved you. She dedicated her career to you and all you did was stab her in the back.
Maria was there when Ellie cried for you. Maria was there when Ellie realized she was losing followers. Maria was there when Abby announced that you had become her manager. Maria was there.
And this is what she had to say?
Fuck her.
"Don't cry. don't cry" Ellie muttered to herself.
It would ruin her make up. It would ruin the night. Maria already ruined it, but this would make it worse.
Ellie slung her guitar over her body, she heard her chains rattle at the sudden movement.
She walked onto the stage.
No screams. There was barley a crowd.
What do you expect if you perform at a rundown bar?
A few claps came from the so called crowd.
Ellie didn't even bother introducing herself, all she did was signal for Jesse to start the music.
As soon as the beat played Ellie felt alive. It felt like she'd she'd dead for years, starved even, now she's alive.
The music awoke something in her.
Ellie smiled, and when she looked at the crowd her smile dropped realizing, no one fucking cared.
She was wasting her talent on idiots. And it was your fault.
"Give it to me; I don’t want it
Give it to me; I won’t make you feel like someone else
Give it to me; I don’t want it
I’ve lost it"
No one in the crowd seemed to care.
She sang the lyrics with passion. With grace and talent.
Maybe she lose her fucking mind to believe that she could still be a rockstar.
It made headlines.
Awake to your mind
It’s hard to believe all the things he did
Before he said who’s right
Awake to the signs
It’s hard to bеlieve all the things hе said
Before he changed his mind
Abby Andersons new rock broke so many records.
It was all over the news.
Ellie didn't know what to feel. Jealous? Angry? Sad?
She knew she couldn't be mad at Abby, it wasn't her fault. It was yours.
You were the one that made her this big.
Ellie knew she couldn't be mad because at some point in her career that was her too.
You brought her that level of fame too, and you brutally took it away
Ellie met you a heavy metal concert one night.
"You like them too?" Ellie asked surprised when she saw a pretty girl like you in such a dark place.
"I'm fucking obsessed with them" you have her a bright smile.
And the rest was history.
You motivated Ellie to start her career. You motived her to continue with her passion for rock music. You helped her express herself.
You saw her talent.
Everything Ellie was, was because of you.
Most of Ellies first songs were love songs that she dedicated to you. She fell in love with you, and she was too afraid to tell you.
Maybe you didn't like her back and you were her manager after all, if she fucked it up, it would be awkward.
With Ellies unique lyrics and style her career quickly took off.
People loved what she put out, and because Ellie was attractive more and more people craved her.
With you by her side, she had more motivation to make music, hoping that you'd realize her feelings, that she had for you and that you'd like her back.
You were a marketing genius, you knew how to get her music out there in creative ways. You knew how to get Ellie's face everywhere.
Thanks to you, there was not one person in Jackson who didn't know who Ellie Williams was.
Interviews, photoshoots, music videos, you arranged everything. You made her famous.
One night you had asked her "who's your songs about? This girl must be stupid not to see that you love her"
Ellie's reply was a kiss. She put so much emotion into that kiss. She hoped you'd feel all her unspoken feelings.
"It's me?" you questions as she pulled away.
"yeah"
The two of you kissed, you spent the night making love, and you kissed once again. With you in her arms Ellie knew what her next song was going to be about.
The next morning when Ellie woke up you weren't there.
You had vanished. She had grabbed her phone seeing that you had blocked her.
What the fuck?
Ellie whet to her room and her music book was gone.
Years worth of music was gone.
You had left her without a manger and without a music book.
Soon after news broke that you were Abby's new manager and her first singles was one of Ellie's songs.
What the actual fuck.
You were using her. You never felt anything for Ellie. Your heart always belonged to Abby and you had promised your girlfriend that you'd make her famous, and you kept that promise.
Look at her.
She was bigger than Ellie Williams.
Abby's whole album was songs that Ellie wrote. For you.
You took her ideas, her fans, her joy, her love, her everything.
Ellie sobbed into her pillow as she saw the pictures of you and Abby. She saw the way Abby's career took off with her music.
Because of you, Ellie was left with nothing.
No music, no you, no fans. All she had was a failing career.
She was left alone and betrayed by the one she loved most
Ellie Williams Masterlist
main masterlist
about me!
series˚₊۶ৎ˙⋆
part 1 part 2 part 3
part 1 part 2 part 3
part 1 part 2
part 1 part 2
professor ellie masterlist
part 1 part 2
part 1 part 2
drabbles, hcs and short stories˚₊۶ৎ˙⋆
ellie taking care of sick reader (hcs)
toxic ellie (hcs)
douchebag ellie (hcs)
ellie warming you up (ss)
ellie saying you're a piece of art (ss)
I missed youu, I hope you’re doing well mentally and I’m looking forward to more of your work💗💗
Thank you pookie!! I have a few surprises for yall;))
Are you interested im doing something with the song she by tyler the creator ft Frank ocean?
Could be for ellie or abby, but its really giving dark vibes of lesbian yearning 😭
Thank you!
hi anon! i am totally interested!! id write whatever you ask:) i went quite dark with this one... lmk if you want one with a happy ending:) i deadass got carried away with writing this lmao
this story is based off the song She by Tyler the Creator. If you can listen to the song as you're reading:)
pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader
requests are open, send me songs or your silly ideas:)
HUGE WARNING: 18+ MDNI: Mentions of explicit sexual content (restraints, biting, choking, rough sex), obsession, psychological manipulation, mental deterioration, dubious/blurred consent in emotional and sexual contexts, Stockholm syndrome, stalking, kidnapping, murder, suicide, obsessive-compulsive tendencies, paranoia, delusions, violence
Summary: When Ellie starts watching her a little too closely, it’s hard to tell where curiosity ends and obsession begins. What begins as quiet glances and subtle tension quickly turns into something darker—something neither of them fully understands, but both feel deeply.
masterlist
This story contains dark and emotionally intense themes—please read with care. You are responsible for what you consume online. Please read the warnings before reading.
You moved into the safe zone two months ago. Quiet, kind, polite. You kept to yourself, helped at the medical tent, smiled when people passed. Ellie noticed you right away.
Not because you stood out—at least not to most. But Ellie saw the way your hands trembled slightly when you stitched a wound. How your eyes scanned the environment like you were waiting for someone to come back. Or leave.
She liked that.
She liked the way your window lit up at night, a soft amber glow behind sheer curtains. You read. Sometimes you cried. Once, you laughed—just once—and she pressed her forehead against her window across the alley and watched your lips form around a sentence. She imagined you reading to her. Her name in your mouth. Her name in your bed.
She told herself she was just watching. But then it became routine.
She started to learn the rhythm of your days. When you left. What time you came back. What you wore. What you ate. The exact second you turned off your lamp and slid under the covers. She’d stand in the shadows across the street, chewing on the skin of her thumb, eyes locked on that sliver of light between your curtains.
Ellie didn’t smile much anymore. Not unless she thought of you. And even then, it wasn’t a smile. It was something darker—sharper. Something that clenched her stomach like a fist and made her palms itch.
She wasn’t supposed to feel this way. You weren’t hers. But that didn’t stop her.
You first met her when she came in with a deep cut on her forearm. Self-stitched, jagged. Her expression unreadable.
“You should’ve come in earlier,” you told her, gently cleaning the wound. “This could’ve gotten infected.”
She just stared. “Didn’t want to waste your time.”
You paused. “You knew it would be me?”
Her jaw flexed. “Yeah.”
You smiled. Ellie didn’t.
But later that night, she traced the shape of your smile in the fogged glass of her bedroom window. Over and over until her finger bled from the cold.
Ellie started showing up more. Dropping off supplies. Asking if you needed help moving crates. Pretending to look for something just outside your tent.
“I heard you play guitar,” you said once, handing her a bandage kit. “Do you still?”
“Only in my head.”
You wanted to ask what that meant. But her eyes were dark that day. Watching you like she already had the answer.
You didn’t know she was in your hallway the night you cried into your pillow. That she sat just outside your door, back against the wood, fists clenched, listening.
You didn’t know she stole one of your gloves when it dropped outside the infirmary. That she kept it in her jacket pocket. That she touched it every time someone else looked at you too long.
You didn’t know you were the reason someone disappeared.
That guy—tall, arrogant, always flirting—he hadn’t shown up in over a week. No one knew where he went. Ellie did.
She watched him follow you to your door one night. Heard you laugh nervously when he touched your arm. Saw the way you recoiled when he leaned in too close.
Ellie followed him into the woods the next day. Said nothing. Did what she had to.
For you.
One night, you came home late. The infirmary was overwhelmed. Blood on your shirt. You were tired, broken, still so beautiful. Ellie watched you through the crack in your curtain.
She saw you undress.
Saw your bare skin in that soft yellow light. Saw you pause in front of the mirror, fingertips grazing your ribs like you didn’t recognize yourself.
Ellie’s breath hitched. Her hand trembled. She pressed it to the windowpane like she could reach through.
You looked sad. You looked lonely. You looked like you needed someone.
Her.
The first time you saw her watching, it wasn’t on purpose.
You pulled your curtain aside to close the window and there she was—across the alley, standing in the dark. Still. Unmoving. Eyes glowing faintly under the porch light.
You froze. She didn’t.
She just tilted her head. Slowly. Like a predator curious if its prey would run.
You didn’t.
You closed the curtain. Heart pounding. Skin hot. You should’ve been afraid.
But you weren’t.
Ellie showed up the next morning like nothing happened. Gave you a thermos of coffee. Smiled—for the first time. You stared at her fingers as they brushed yours. Cold. Calloused. Familiar. You let her in that day.
She sat in your chair. Looked at your books. Touched the necklace on your shelf like she already knew its weight.
“You’ve been watching me,” you said, not a question.
Ellie blinked. “Yeah.”
You swallowed. “Why?”
She stood up. Walked toward you. Stopped just short of touching.
“Because I love you.”
You should’ve laughed. Should’ve run. Should’ve screamed.
But all you said was: “Since when?”
Ellie’s voice dropped. “Since the first time you turned on that fucking light.”
You kissed her. You didn’t mean to. Or maybe you did. Maybe you were just as broken.
It was desperate. All teeth and breath and guilt. She gripped your waist like she was afraid you’d disappear. You gripped her jaw like you wanted to know her shape from the inside out.
It wasn’t soft. It wasn’t sweet.
It was dangerous. But it felt like breathing after drowning.
Now she’s in your bed almost every night.
She never stays till morning. Always slips out before the sun rises, back to her shadows, back to her window.nBut her scent lingers on your sheets.
And when you close your eyes, you feel her watching.
And when you open them, she’s there. She always is.
The first time you tried to distance yourself, Ellie didn’t speak.
You had turned to her in bed, barely whispering, “I think I need space.”
Your voice cracked. You hated how small it sounded.
Ellie didn’t flinch. Didn’t argue. Just nodded. Kissed your shoulder and slipped out like always. But that night, your window stayed open.
She didn’t watch you through it. She was already inside.
She started leaving things in your house. Quietly, deliberately. A book you mentioned once—resting on your nightstand. Her hoodie folded on the arm of your couch. A note in your handwriting that you didn’t remember writing.
“You miss me.”
You found it under your pillow.
Your hands trembled as you stared at it. You told yourself you were imagining things. You told yourself it was just coincidence. You told yourself Ellie wouldn't do that.
But deep down, you knew better.
People started asking if you and Ellie were together. You always paused too long before answering. Smiled too tightly. Said, “It’s complicated.”
Ellie never used that word. She said, “She’s mine.”
She wasn’t just watching anymore.
She was following.
You’d leave work and catch a flicker of her hoodie in the crowd. You’d step outside at night and feel her behind you. You’d dream of her fingers wrapped around your wrist, yanking you back into her.
One night, you turned the corner too fast and slammed into her chest. She didn’t apologize.
Her hands gripped your arms.
“I didn’t know you were—” you started.
“Yes, you did,” she said. Her voice was a blade.
You didn’t move. Neither did she.
The tension curled around your throat like smoke. You wanted to run. You wanted to stay. You wanted her to tear you apart.
Inside her mind, it only made sense:
She knew what you liked. What you feared. What you needed.
She could protect you. She could fix the ache inside your chest.
You just had to stop pretending you didn’t feel it too.
You were hers. You just didn’t understand it yet.
Ellie started keeping a journal. It wasn’t full of words. Just drawings.
Of you.
Sleeping. Smiling. Naked. Crying.
Sometimes she’d draw herself with you—your hand in hers, your head on her chest. But always, always, your eyes were closed.
She liked it better that way.
When another woman tried to flirt with you at the market, Ellie was there before you could even react. Just a shadow beside your shoulder.
“She’s not interested,” Ellie said, low and cold.
You touched her wrist. “Ellie, stop—”
The woman blinked at her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”
Ellie didn’t respond. Just stared. Long enough to make her leave. Long enough to make her afraid.
Later, Ellie brushed your hair off your cheek and whispered, “You don’t need anyone else.”
You didn’t answer. Because part of you agreed.
You started hearing her voice even when she wasn’t there.
Soft murmurs at the edge of your consciousness. A whisper behind your ear.
“You’re mine.”
You looked over your shoulder constantly. Not because you were scared. But because you hoped it was her.
One night, you confronted her. “Are you watching me when I sleep?”
Ellie didn’t lie.
“Yes.”
Your throat tightened. “Why?”
She stepped forward. Her hands cradled your jaw like you were something fragile—something sacred.
“Because it’s the only time you’re honest.”
You shuddered. “That’s not love.”
Ellie’s eyes flashed. “No. It’s more than that.”
She started sleeping on your floor.
Didn’t ask. Just curled up on the rug like a stray wolf. Eyes closed, but never fully asleep. You stepped over her on the way to the bathroom and felt her fingers brush your ankle.
You didn’t stop her. You didn’t speak.
You just left the door unlocked. Every night.
Eventually, your light never turned off.
You didn’t pull the curtains anymore. You let her see.
Because pretending you weren’t hers felt worse than giving in.
And the worst part? You started watching her too.
You counted her steps. You tracked her breath.
You studied the scars on her knuckles and the cracks in her voice when she said your name.
You wanted her under your skin, even when it hurt. Especially when it hurt.
It wasn’t love. It wasn’t sane. It wasn’t safe.
But it was real.
And in this world, that was all you had.
The cabin was two hours from the nearest town.
You didn’t remember falling asleep in the car. You didn’t remember agreeing to come.
You just remembered Ellie’s voice: “There’s too many people around you. Too many eyes.”
She made it sound like love. And you were so tired of fighting.
You woke up wrapped in thick blankets. The fire crackled low. Rain tapped against the window like a pulse.
And Ellie was already watching.
She sat in the rocking chair, legs spread wide, one hand curled beneath her chin. The other rested on her thigh.
“You’re safe now,” she said.
You sat up slowly, brain hazy. “Where are we?”
“Somewhere they can’t reach you.”
You should have run. Instead, you pulled the blanket tighter. And whispered, “Okay.”
The first few days felt like a dream. A stillness you didn’t realize you craved. Ellie chopped wood outside shirtless, sweat glistening down her spine. She cooked, fed you, fixed the fire. She moved like a soldier, like a lover, like something primal that found peace only when she could watch you.
“Do you hate it here?” she asked one night. You shook your head.
Because here, she didn’t have to hide what she was. And neither did you.
She kissed you after dinner. Hard. Possessive.
You tasted desperation in it—an edge like she was afraid you’d disappear mid-kiss. Her hands slid under your thighs, lifting you effortlessly onto the counter. The plates clattered. You didn’t care.
“Tell me you’re mine,” she growled against your throat.
You couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. Your head lolled back as her hand slid up your shirt, gripping your breast with a brutal need.
“Say it.”
“I’m yours,” you gasped. It felt like a vow.
That night, she took you.
Face pressed into the mattress. Hands pinned above your head. Her mouth feverish on your skin, trailing teeth and tongue in frantic worship. Every thrust came with a litany—Mine. Mine. Mine.—punctuated by bruises blooming under her fingertips.
You came with a scream you didn’t recognize. You came again, sobbing her name.
And when it was over, she curled around you like armor.
Whispered, “I won’t let anyone take you from me.”
You didn’t reply. Because you didn’t want to leave.
Days blurred.
Ellie read to you, bathed you, watched you sleep. She didn’t let you touch the keys. Didn’t let you wander past the woods.
“It’s not safe,” she’d repeat. “People lie. I don’t.”
You believed her. Or you needed to believe her.
One night, she tied your wrists with her belt. Not out of cruelty.
But because you asked her to.
Because your mind was starting to slip too—spiraling in on itself like hers.
“I want to feel it,” you whispered. “What it’s like to be… owned.”
Something in Ellie snapped. She fucked you on the floor. Face flushed, voice shaking. She held your chin and made you watch her as you came. Over and over.
“You’re not leaving,” she told you afterward. You smiled, dazed.
“Why would I?”
You found her journal. Pages filled with you—sketches, fantasies, maps of your body. But also lists. Daydreams:
"Her in a collar"
"Me watching her sleep, knife under the pillow"
"Keep her full. Keep her scared. Keep her close"
"Fuck her in front of a mirror until she can’t tell who she is anymore"
You should’ve been afraid. But instead, you wrote your name in the margin next to hers.
By the second week, you stopped asking when you’d go back.
By the third, you stopped wondering who you used to be.
You were hers now. And worse?
She was yours.
Because obsession, when shared, is just another kind of love.
You don’t know how long you’ve been in the cabin.
Days feel like water slipping through your fingers. You forget what month it is. Sometimes Ellie forgets your name. But you always know hers.
She carved it into the headboard, right above where she made you hers. She whispers it into your skin every night like a ritual. She branded it into your bones.
Ellie.
She watches you brush your hair. Stares like she’s never seen a woman before. Like you’re some phantom that might slip through the cracks if she blinks too long.
“I think I’d kill someone for you,” she says one morning.
You don’t flinch. You smile.
“Who?”
She doesn’t answer. But that night, there’s blood under her fingernails.
You break first. It happens slowly—your grip on reality softens like wet paper.
You cry when your reflection doesn’t smile back. You scream at the storm outside like it’s mocking you. You bite down on Ellie’s arm while she’s fucking you because you need to feel something real.
She doesn’t punish you. She moans.
Ellie starts hearing things.
She locks the door even when no one’s around. She kisses you with a hand on your throat now, like she’s making sure you don’t lie. You find notes stuffed in her boots:
“She’s slipping. She’s forgetting me. I’ll make her remember.”
You don’t tell her you read them. Instead, you leave one of your own:
“If I forget you, kill me.”
The next time she fucks you, it’s on the front porch. Naked. In the cold. Rain on your bare chest. She wants the world to see—wants the sky to know you’re hers. You ride her with your hands knotted in her hair, blood dripping from your lip where she bit you. You come like you’re trying to leave your body behind. She drags you back in with her mouth.
You stop caring about survival.
You drink wine for breakfast. You forget how to spell your last name. You tell Ellie she’s inside your lungs and she kisses your ribs like that’ll keep her there.
“I want to die here,” you say one night.
She presses her forehead to yours.
“We already did.”
There’s no mirror in the bedroom anymore.
You smashed it after Ellie asked, “Do you still recognize yourself?”
You didn’t.
You don’t.
And that was the point.
The last time you go outside, it’s because Ellie begs you to. She wants to show you something—this twisted, gorgeous mural she painted in the barn. It's all you.
Your eyes. Your mouth. Your cunt, over and over, blooming like some unholy flower.
“It’s worship,” she says.
You drop to your knees and lick the paint off her fingers.
There’s no turning back.
Not now. Not when the lines between captor and captive, lover and lunatic, have blurred past meaning.
You are two sides of the same sickness now.
Two gods of one deranged altar.
Two corpses in one grave, still moving, still wanting.
You kiss her like drowning. She holds you like possession.
And when the world finally forgets you exist— You are relieved.
The cabin is quiet. Too quiet.
Ellie hasn’t spoken in two days. Not really. She hums to herself, sometimes, drawing you in her sketchbook over and over until the pages wrinkle under the pressure of her pencil.
You ask what she’s thinking.
She just looks up and says, “You’re so quiet when you sleep.”
Like that answers anything. Like that means everything.
That night, she takes you to bed like it’s the last time. She’s soft with you. Gentle, even.
Kisses your eyelids, your palms, your knees. Cradles your hips like she’s trying to memorize their weight. She doesn’t fuck you like she wants to own you—she fucks you like she’s already lost you.
You cry. She doesn’t ask why.
When you wake up, the gun is on the pillow. It’s cleaned.
Oiled. Loaded.
And next to it is her final drawing: the two of you under the covers, a red thread wrapped around your throats, knotted into a bow at the center.
Underneath, she’s written: If we can’t live like this, we don’t live at all.
You find her on the floor, knees tucked under her like a child. She’s holding a second pistol, one she probably stole months ago.
When she looks at you, she doesn’t smile. She just says, “Will you let me do it?”
You nod.
Because that’s love, too. Trusting someone to end you.
She holds you in her lap, like a lullaby. One hand buried in your hair, the other on your pulse. You breathe together.
You’re not afraid. Not anymore.
“I love you,” you whisper.
Ellie kisses your temple.
“I know.”
The first shot rings out, and the birds fly from the trees.
The second shot follows, echoing through the forest like a vow.
And then— Nothing.
When they find the bodies, you're curled together, as if sleeping.
No notes. No names. Just each other.
Forever.
Dina ??? Masterlist
main master list
about me!
Stories。𖦹°‧⭑.ᐟ
can we get more abuser ellie headcannons/drabbles :)
Headcannons: toxic!ellie williams x reader
Hi anon! I just wanted to say a few things before I start. This not your fault and I’m not mad at you for requesting this. Thank you for your request and I hope you like what I have done<3
Before we start I would like to say a couple of things. I am in no way, shape or form trying to romanticize abuse. Abusive relationships and situations are traumatic to those who have experienced it. In my therefore you and me series I did write about abuse and I tried not to romanticize it. That is why I killed Ellie’s character at the end because of she had done. So once again, let’s not romanticize this, because people lose their lives daily because of it. I deeply apologize to those who I have hurt and triggered in my series. I do want to disappoint whoever requested this so I changed it into toxic!Ellie x reader with a not so toxic ending.
☆ Toxic Ellie who met you in a bar one night and immediately fell head over heels for you.
☆ Toxic Ellie who stomach churned every time she saw you interacting with your friends. ‘
☆ Toxic Ellie who started taking your phone while you were asleep to check if you were cheating.
☆ Toxic Ellie who started following you to work every morning to make sure you weren’t talking to any other girl.
☆ Toxic Ellie who would lose her shit when she saw you smile with someone else.
☆ Toxic Ellie who makes multiple accounts on social media to threaten your coworkers and friends.
☆ Toxic Ellie who comforts you as you cried because none of your friends wanted to talk to you anymore.
☆ Toxic Ellie who gets a job directly across the café where you work so watch you.
☆ Toxic Ellie who starts arguments with you because she doesn’t like when you talk to other people.
“just fucking leave me already” she yelled.
“Ellie why are you yelling? She literally just helped me carry my groceries”
“don’t fucking lie, if I didn’t show up, you would’ve fucked her”
☆ Toxic Ellie who cuts up your clothing when you have to go out, and then you have to stay home with her.
☆ Toxic Ellie who gets emotional when you don’t respond to her within one minute
“you’re probably fucking someone else”
☆ Toxic Ellie who threatens you if you try to leave.
“you’re a bad person” you spoke through tears
“I swear if you leave me I’ll kill anyone who comes near you”
☆ Toxic Ellie who hacks your social medias and reads your DM’s because she’s scared you might find someone else.
☆ Toxic Ellie who starts going to therapy because you threatened her with a restraining order.
☆ Toxic Ellie who talks about her childhood and how much she hated her parents.
☆ Toxic Ellie who realizes that she has attachment issues.
☆ Toxic Ellie who realizes her behavior was bad.
☆ Toxic Ellie who shows up to your apartment sobbing and apologizing.
☆ Toxic Ellie who goes to therapy twice a week, and learns ways to deal with her issues.
☆ Not so toxic Ellie who forgives her parents and moves on.
☆ Not so toxic Ellie who finally moves on from her trauma.
☆ Not so toxic Ellie finally living a happy and normal life with you.
☆ Not so toxic Ellie who finally gets a happy ending.
Do you still dream of me? - (ellie williams x reader)
meep moop, i'm home and i'm here for blood:) I hope yall enjoy this short story while i ease into writing again <3
Pairing: ellie x fem!reader
requests are open! send me your silly thoughts:)
warnings: sadness
Summary: In which you still dream about her
authors note: yall i graduated 12th grade on a random thursday, I'm employed ugh
masterlist
"don't be such a pussy!" She yelled as you stood at the edge of the lake.
"I don't think this is a safe els" you replied with a weary look.
She got out of the water, her clothes soaked and sticking to her skin, hugging her in all the right places.
You would be a fool to look away when this is one of the only opportunities to see her like this in all her glory. Her skin was glowing, her hair wet.
She slowly walked out of the water and it was as if she was moving in slow motion. You couldn't describe what you felt in that moment.
When it came to her, you never could.
You've never been so attracted to someone, you've never trusted someone to this extent, you've never cared for someone so deeply, yet you never could tell her that you felt this way.
"Focus on me" you heard Ellie tell you.
how could you not?
"i am"
"you're not, you're zoning out"
She walked over to where you were sitting, water droplets fell from her hair and clothes. The area where she sat was soaking wet.
"What's bothering you?" she asked.
You sigh and you turn to her, the two of you made eye contact.
Fuck.
If you were an ice cream you'd have melted a long time ago.
"I miss you" you simply said, feeling vulnerable under her gaze. She sighs getting up and turning away from you.
"dont say that"
"but i do els"
"it was for the better"
"no you were selfish" you snap.
her fists clench by her sides
"what's selfish is you not letting me go" she replied.
You stayed silent her words hitting you like a hammer. Her words hurt, it hurt because you knew she was right. There was a long silence between the two of you. You were processing the words Ellie had just spoken and she was waiting for you to reply to what she just said.
She felt regret for leaving you, anger because you waited for her and sadness because she never got to tell you how she really felt.
You felt resentment towards her because how could she do that you, anger because she left and sadness because she never knew how you felt.
She turned to you giving you a small smile, she reached out her hand and she muttered: "do you still dream of me? Because i dream of you"
You looked at her with a shocked expression. This is what you wanted to hear. All these years that you've been no one but your friend. She's admitting it. The confirmation that you needed. Maybe she did feel the same way.
You reach out to grab her hand. That's all you've ever wanted to do.
As soon as you felt her soft hand against yours you woke up with a gasp, breathing heavily. You were in a puddle of your sweat as your eyes searched the room for any sign of her. You got up and ran through the house.
"Ellie?"
"Ellie!"
"Ellie?"
You called over and over again.
The house was just as cold and empty empty as it was when she left 7 months ago.
She went after Abby. She chose Abby over you.
You let out a sigh as you slowly walked back to your room.
She'll be back right?
You got into the bed you'd hope one day you'd share with her. Your head hit the cold pillow as you stared out the window.
Her question replayed in your mind:
"do you still dream of me?"
you let out a lob sob "i do els, every night"
You hoped she heard you. Wherever she was.
<3
thank you for all the love on professor ellie!
masterlist
professor ellie
first time (nsfw)
nsfw headcannons
more headcannons
starting a life together
getting married
having a baby
grading
aurora bloom
baby number 2
more headcannons
more nsfw neadcannons
baby brain
Aurora teaches
student flirting with you
your college party habits
her student calls you milf
ellie's wedding ring obsession
you give a lecture
Aurora's first period
for @fleshunger ty for being patient, ily <3
This story is based off the song Mary by Alex G, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading! There is another version to this fic! You can read it here:)
Pairing: ellie x fem!reader
requests are open again! send me your silly thoughts
warnings: angst.
Summary: in which you left her to rot
authors note: lmao yall probably hate me for posting so much, forgive me pookies, I swear after tomorrow i'll post less....
Mary is the girl that I wanna kiss
She's got big red eyes and big red lips
She's got big sharp teeth and big fat hips
Mary is the girl that I wanna fuck
She's got leather heart and leather gloves
She's the only girl that I wanna love
"I wanna kiss her so bad" Ellie vented to Dina.
Dina rolled her eyes at Ellie.
She was in love. Really in love.
In all the years Dina has known Ellie she has never seen her this down bad.
"What's so special about this girl anyway?" She asked as she took a bite from Ellie's sandwich.
"What type of a question is that?" Ellie asked. She felt disrespected on your behalf.
"She's got beautiful eyes- and she looks good with red lipstick. Even without lipstick, her lips are so kissable"
A small smile appeared on Dina's face as she listened to her friend describe the girl she was so deeply in love with.
"She's got big fat hips too and I just want to eat her-"
"woah Ellie calm down, that's too much information"
Ellie's face went red with embarrassment.
"How'd you meet her" Dina asked.
"at a fruit Market" Ellie replied with a shrug.
Bananas or oranges?
Bananas?
Oranges?
Ellie was currently thinking about what she should get as she stood in front of the fruit stand. Since when was it so fucking difficult to choose fruit?
"If you think harder, much you might explode" she heard someone chuckle next to her.
Ellie turned to where your voice was coming from, her heart rate suddenly increased.
Angles are fucking real.
"um- yeah" Ellie responded awkwardly.
She cleared her throat and she fixed her posture.
"Bananas or orange?" She asked you.
What the fuck Ellie? Why would you fucking ask that?
You turned your head to look at the fruit, before you reached out to grab a banana.
"It looks fresher" you shrugged as you gave the banana to her.
Your fingertips brushed against hers, and a shock of electricity ran through Ellie.
Her palms felt sweaty, she couldn't breathe.
Focus Ellie. Focus.
"Thank you" You gave her a small smile as you started walking away.
'C'mon Ellie make your move' she thought to herself.
"hey wait!" Ellie yelled as you started walking away.
You turned around to look at her.
"Can I have your number?"
"That's fucking cliché" Dina laughed.
"shut up" Ellie muttered annoyed.
The two girl fell into a comfortable silence as Ellie's thoughts wondered to you.
Oh you would've loved this salad. You would've loved this ice tea. Maybe she should've asked you to come out instead of Dina
*ding*
Ellie reached down to grab her phone. It was you.
Her girl.
Not officially her girlfriend yet, but soon.
She clicked onto the notification with your name.
"Come over please"
fuck yes
Ellie jumped up, and she looked at Dina with a grin.
"My girl is looking for me"
Dina laughed at her friends excitement.
"go get her tiger"
Ellie gave Dina a hug as she ran towards your apartment.
Today she felt confident. Today she was the day she was going to ask you to be her girlfriend. You messaging her was a sign from the gods above.
Ellie's legs were hurting, and she was out of breathe but she was on her way to finally tell the girl of her dreams that she was the one she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.
Listen to me, baby, I don't mind
I wanna be with you and waste my time
Give it to me, baby, I feel good
I wanna feel whatever you think I should
Sing it for me, baby, play my song
I wanna hear your daddy sing along
Mary is the girl that leaves you to rot
She says, "I am real and you are not"
She says, "I am real and you are not"
Ellie knocked at your front door.
She kept knocking and she's been standing outside of your apartment for the last 10 minutes.
Where were you? Maybe you were laying dead on the floor?
Ellie knocked and knocked but yet you never came.
Was this a prank?
She held the doorknob as she opened the door.
It was open this whole time.
Ellie slowly walked into your apartment, and she looked around the place you called home.
It felt oddly empty.
The little trinkets you kept around was all suddenly gone.
The apartment filled with so much life at one point, suddenly dull and lifeless.
Ellie's eyes went around the room and her eyes landed on a white envelope.
On the front was your pretty handwriting and Ellie's name decorated the front.
With shaky hands Ellie picked it up, and she opened it.
Dear Ellie
Or should I say banana girl?
She chucked remembering your first interaction.
I'm sorry for what I'm about to tell you, please don't hate me. I truly never wanted to hurt you Ellie. But I know you have feelings for me. I don't feel the same way. I never wanted to reject you, because I valued our friendship too much. So for the sake of your feelings, I left. I changed my number, so you wont be able to message me. I'm sorry Els.
I love you.
Ellie didn't realize that she started shaking till she finished reading the letter.
She tore the letter apart and her knees buckled.
She fell to the ground sobbing.
You made feel so alive, but you just killed her again.
All the love Ellie had for you was rotting away into hated.
She loved you so much but you left her to rot.
This story is based off the song Is there someone else? by The Weeknd. If you can please listen to the song while reading:)
(Fun fact I love Abel’s music, I’ve been a XO for years so it’s only fitting for me to use his music, and with that you can expect a lot of stories based off his songs! Anyway let’s get back to the story;) )
Pairing: Jackson!ellie x fem!reader
Requests are always open, feel free to leave one, or just send me a song and I’ll take it from there!
Warnings: mentions of cheating
Summary: All Ellie wanted was for you to forgive her
I know that you're hiding something from me
That's been close to your heart
And I felt it creeping up every day
Baby, right from the start
Ellie sat across you, as she watched your hands fidget. She knew there was something off about you. She knew you were hiding something from her. And if she had to guess by your recent behavior she could tell that it was serious.
You’ve been acting strange for the last few months now. You were distant. Cold. You weren’t that ray of sunshine she fell in love with.
As the days go by Ellie can’t help but feel more and more alone. She didn’t only feel alone, but she became touch starved by the distance you kept from her. You were there but you weren’t. You were hers but you weren’t. You started talking to her less, you stopped any form of physical contact with Ellie. No more hugging, no more cuddling. Nothing.
And in the beginning Ellie was concerned. She thought maybe you were sick, or hurt. But as time went on and you were pulling away from her not just physically but emotionally too- Ellie knew there was something much deeper than a sickness. For weeks she’s searched her brain to try and figure out.
What the hell was wrong with you? How could she help you? Did Ellie do something? Was your behavior her fault? What the fuck is happening to the love of her life?
I know that look you give when we're fighting (fighting)
We're fighting (fighting)
'Cause I used to be the one who was lying (lying)
Oh, lying (lying)
Ellie stared at you, your gaze cold. She looked into your eyes, and normally when she would look at you, your eyes would be filled with love and admiration for Ellie- but all she could see was anger. Hatred. Ellie became sick of your behavior and she decided to confront you. The argument started off simple, with Ellie saying something along the lines of “are you ok? you’ve been acting weird babe. You know you can always talk to me” What was supposed to be a normal conversation escalated very quickly.
“Baby look I don’t want to argue with you- I just need you to be honest with me” Ellie begged. She looked at you with pleading eyes.
You scoffed “as if you have ever been honest with me”
As soon as those words left your lips, tension filled the room. The room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.
One night after a very rough day on patrol, Ellie and Dina went out. After a couple of drinks, the two girls ended up, hooking up in your house. It didn’t take a long time for you to find out. Ellie wasn’t really good at hiding things. And when you found out you were crushed. And Ellie knew she messed up a good thing as soon as she saw the tears fill your eyes as she told you. Ellie was filled with guilt and regret. You almost left Ellie that day. But you didn’t. You stayed. You stayed because you loved her. You gave her a second chance. A chance to prove herself. It was hard for you in the beginning but eventually you and Ellie went back to ‘normal’. But that normal didn’t last very long.
Oh. Now everything made sense. Ellie sat there, mouth agape, at your response. She heard you let out a huff “look Ellie- I love you. But I can’t just forget and move on’’
Before any words could leave Ellie’s mouth you spoke again “I need space, I need someone who won’t do what you did, because if really did love me, you wouldn’t have slept with Dina”
The words rang in Ellie’s ears:
” I need someone who won’t do what you did” You wanted someone else?
“If you really did love me, you wouldn’t have slept with Dina”
Ellie sat there in silence. She watched you pick up a bag walk to the door. “I’m going out don’t wait up” And you left. You didn’t look back. As soon as the door shut Ellie let out a sob. A gut wrenching sob. She knew she made a mistake but she didn’t know that it would lead to this. Ellie loved you. You were her entire world and to hear you say really did love me you wouldn’t have slept with Dina hurts because she loved you. She loved you more than life itself.
The words bounced around in her head over and over again “I need someone who won’t do what you did, because if really did love me, you wouldn’t have slept with Dina”
“I need someone who won’t do what you did, because if really did love me, you wouldn’t have slept with Dina”
Oh (oh), is there someone else or not?
'Cause I wanna keep you close
I don't wanna lose my spot
'Cause I need to know
If you're hurting him, or you're hurting me
If I ain't with you, I don't wanna be
Is there someone else or not?
Ooh, or not
Ellie felt her eyes gloss over as she watched you sit at the end of the bed. She felt her tears run down her face, in an attempt to not look so vulnerable Ellie brought her knees to her chest, and she put her chin on her kneecaps. You weren’t looking at her- fidgeting with your hands.
Ellie knew you were nervous; the fact you aren’t making eyes contact with her was already a sign. Ellie wasn’t sure why she was crying, all you did was walk into the room and you sat down on the bed. But Ellie had a feeling. Her gut was telling her you were going to say something she wouldn’t like. You were there to break her heart. Ellie let a small whimper and turned to look at her. You didn’t reach out to her, like you normally would. You didn’t comfort her. You just looked at her and you said “Ellie now is not the time to cry” Your face was as beautiful as always. You voice calm, while Ellie was wreck across from you.
“Is there someone else?” Ellie whispered. And as soon as those words left her mouth, Ellie could tell by your facial expression there was. There is someone else.
“No” Ellie whispered, frantic as brought her hands over her ears as she let out loud sobs, repeating the words no over and over again. There is someone else.
For how long? Was it a girl or a boy? Ellie was the other women.
Ellie needed to hear the words leave your mouth. She needed you to say yes. She needed to know if she lost her spot. Being the girl you came home to, being the girl you shared your hopes and dreams with. She wanted to be that girl forever, but she isn’t that girl anymore. There was someone else. Ellie needed to know. Ellie didn’t want to be with anyone but you. You were her everything, even the thought of her being with someone disgusts her.
As Ellie sat there rocking back and forth screaming her lungs out, she felt you gently holding her, and shushing her.
“Sh sh sh baby its ok” you said softly. Even with the current situation Ellie immediately leaned into your hold, grabbing onto your t-shirt and sobbing into your arms. You were humming a soft tune, because you knew music always calmed Ellie down. You knew her better than she knew herself.
When Ellie eventually calmed down she pulled away from you slowly, looking at your beautiful face. Your cheeks were slightly wet, from crying as well. Ellie asked the question again:
“Is there someone else?”
And that three letter word let your mouth. Ellie wished you didn’t confirm it. But her question was answered when you let out a simple;
“Yes.”
I don't deserve someone loyal to me
Don't you think I see?
And I don't want to be a prisoner to who I used to be
I swear I changed my ways for the better, the better
'Cause I wanna be with you forever, forever
Ellie was drunk. That night that she hooked up with Dina. She was drunk. Alcohol is not an excuse for cheating, and she knew that but she was drunk. Ellie didn’t think that one drunken mistake would cost her the love of her life.
You were too good for Ellie. Too loving. The things Ellie has done in her life that was disgusting, and cruel. Ellie was heartless. Ellie thought no one could love someone as dirty as she was. But then there was you. You loved Ellie for who she was, and now because she was drunk she lost you. The only person other than Joel that mattered to her. Ellie didn’t deserve you. She didn’t deserve someone as loyal and loving like you were. And even when you gave her that second chance she knew she didn’t deserve it. She deserved you leaving her. She deserved you getting with someone else. Ellie tried changing her ways, because she wanted to be with you forever. Till she took he last breathe she wanted to be with you.
In the months after you and Ellie broke up, she tried proving to you that she was a good person. Even when you broken up she tried. When you had announced this someone else you were seeing was your girlfriend it ruined Ellie. Because she can’t live without you. The fact that you were in a stable relationship with someone that is not her hurts. And even though you had a girlfriend Ellie would still try. She writes you notes, sends you messages through people, pleading that you would give her another chance. Ellie needed you.
But the more Ellie looked at the situation, the more she realized that this was the consequences of her own actions.
Oh, is there someone else or not?
'Cause I wanna keep you close
I don't wanna lose my spot
'Cause I need to know
If you're hurting him, or you're hurting me
If I ain't with you, I don't wanna be
Is there someone else or not?
Ooh, or not
Ellie looked the grin on your face as you walked down the aisle, you looked beautiful in your wedding dress. Ellie dreamed of this day. The day you would walk to her, and get married. And that you would end up her surname.
But now she was a part of the crowd. She watched you walk down the aisle to your girlfriend of 2 years. Her name was Abby. An outsider that joined Jackson in the recent years. You were marrying the women you had left her for.
As the pastor exclaimed you may now kiss the bride, both you and that girl smiled as you leaned in for that kiss. You were married. To someone else. The crowd screamed when your lips locked with hers, and Ellie couldn’t help but let her tear fall at the sight. There was no saving your relationship. It had been almost 3 years since you and Ellie broke up, and she still couldn’t move on. Ellie became a shell of the person she was after you left. Ellie was never the same. And Ellie never will be the same.
Many times Ellie fantasies that Abby was the women that cheated on you. She fantasizes that she was that someone else you left Abby for. But that was not the case.
For the rest of Ellie’s life, she grieved your relationship, while you lived your happily ever after.
Authors note: Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you enjoyed! Remember to always love one another and to be kind…. Requests are always open... Thank you so much for the love and support on all my stories, I love all of you dearly!
Yours truly,
Zia:)