After The Captain

After the Captain

They haunted him at night.

For a while, Rex had convinced himself he was doing okay. He kept moving, place to place, camp to camp, never packing more than he could carry. If it wasn’t in his armor, or tucked into the pockets of his cloak, he didn’t need it. He got up in the morning before the sun, of whatever planet it was today, did. He kept a low profile, watched the gazes of those around him slide over his face without recognition. He collected what he could - bits of data from loosely guarded corners of the networks, bits of food people forgot to chase after, spare parts and necessities from those who forgot to remember them.

In a sense, they’d forgotten him too - him, and the thousands and thousands of people who shared his face. The vode were fading already, sinking to the back of public memory as the Empire hung its gaudy trappings and spread its newly-hatched wings.

But those endless faces never left him alone.

Identical.

Unique. Given the same blank canvas, each person who picks it up will paint something new.

And they had.

He had.

That was the thing. Because he had been one of them, once. There hadn’t been a moment when he hadn’t had someone to turn to, a piece of advice, a shoulder to lean on or a hand to hold or the person next to you, ready to fall in step as you go.

Captain.

They all said it differently, and he did too. It was wry, or joking, affectionate, or sincere, respectful or hopeful or a thousand things he couldn’t name.

For him, it was weighted. Thankful, in a way, desperate, in another. It was the responsibility of all of those faces, all of their newly-painted canvases warped from a galaxy they never knew. But they had never cared, stacking themselves on themselves until someone could make their identity out of the pieces of the others. He could see them without asking their names or finding their faces.

Tup’s smile bled into the horizon, the vod’ika he couldn’t save.

Fives’s laugh echoed in his ears, and something tore in Rex’s stomach every time.

Echo’s hands lingered on his, after the thousandth battle plan, and Rex could only see them shocked thin and wizened and paper-white, abandoned and alone.

Hardcase moved in the corner of his eye, off to his next adventure, and he was gone because Rex hadn’t the strength to stop him.

Kix’s side of the bed was empty, lost to the wind without a word.

Jesse was gone, stolen away, nothing but a body inside of a helmet Rex had helped him paint.

Captain.

There were so many things he could have done. So many things he should have done, would have turned the impossible upside down if it meant saving them for a day, a rotation, a year, a life they never got to live, trauma they never had to have.

Captain.

He heard it in their voices, in Hawk’s voice, in Charger’s voice, in Appo’s and Sterling’s and Koho’s and Vere’s and so many more that he never got the chance to save. He heard it in General Skywalker’s, barely-hidden humor and a kind of sarcastic optimism that infused his steps and his words. He even heard it in Ahsoka’s voice, and he knew she was fine, knew she could take care of herself. But it’s her as barely a Padawan, thrown into a war too big for her, it’s her as a newly-minted commander, it’s her growing into a kind of maturity she shouldn’t have to understand. But he did, because they all did.

It’s Ahsoka’s voice, broken, her hands bloodied and battered from digging their graves. She’s shattered, and there was no one there to hand her a needle and thread and teach her how to sew her scars together.

Captain.

Tup cries, and Fives gasps as his heart fails, and Echo’s hands are cold, and Hardcase closes his eyes before an explosion swallows him whole. Kix’s absence says more than his words ever could, but there’s a ghost of him in all the places he isn’t. And Jesse watches them all. Rex’s mind can imagine what his face looked like, behind his helmet. His eyes glaze and his mouth sets and his newly blank canvas amounts to nothing more than kindling.

Rex wakes up with the salty taste of tears on his tongue. He’s never had to be alone before.

So they haunt him at night, and still he tried to convince himself that he’s okay. He doesn’t deserve not to be. He couldn’t save them. It’s up to him to deal with the ghosts.

He woke before the sun, of whatever today’s planet was. He kept a low profile. He collected what he could.

He kept moving.

*******

oof I hurt myself with this one.

I love Rex. I write for him all the time. But when the prompt was "Captain Rex" I was like....uh....what do I do? (find the full list @clonetober - I can't believe it's been 20 days already.)

It took awhile, but this is what I came up with. What does our boy do after the end of the war?

(it'd be a humanitarian effort to a. give him a many hugs and b. teach him healthy coping strategies.)

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rex

Febuwhump Day 23 - "Don't Leave!"

Summary: While in mandatory quarantine, Rex's gets a visit from a brother he's been missing terribly.

Warning: Hallucinations caused by sickness.

[Sometimes I remember Rex got infected by the Blue Shadow Virus and that recovering from that probably didn't happen in just one day, regardless of there being a miracle cure... It's probably left a mark on his immunity system...]

[THIS STORY IS NOW ON AO3]

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Kix opts to quarantine him despite limited contact with the infected population of the little planet they'd been sent to help evacuate. A plague had run through, destroying a great part of the sentient life forms on said planet, and unfortunately Rex's armour had been breeched during an altercation with a delirious citizen.

Kix decides to quarantine him, because despite his limited contact Rex still got sick in the end. Because his immunity system had been absolutely ruined by his past run in with the BSV. The medic knows best in the end. Gives him several shots of whatever miracle cure the GAR has concocted to fight this menace of a disease, and leaves him to rest and recuperate. But the captain of the 501st can't help but feel uneasy by the decision anyway.

Everyone knew clones didn't do so good in isolation. They were raised in communal circumstances and trained to be dependant of each other's help out in the field, so separation anxiety was something of a common occurance among vode that either lost their squadrons or closest batchmates. Independent survival had to be taught to the clones that expressed enough hardiness to become ARCs.

Rex had earned that honour himself. But he was nothing if not a very social creature. And being confined to a lonely cot was... It was doing things to him.

Between the wet-sounding coughs, the sudden instances where he was overcome by vertigo even as he lay still, and the fogginess that came with flare-ups and fever, Rex wasn't sure what was worse... The fact he felt like he'd been run over and dragged by a hovercraft, or the fact it was getting hard to figure out if the things he was hearing and seeing were real or not.

Because he could swear Keeli was just sitting there with him. Watching him. Talking to him.

He didn't know his vod was on leave... He could have sworn he was on Ryloth...

"Easy now Seven..." His batchmate, his older brother, purred softly as he ran his fingers through the blond fuzz atop Rex's head. "It's just a little cold..."

"M'not supposed to get those..." He murmured back miserably, as he tried to lean into the contact. Everything hurt and he couldn't move. The covers felt really heavy on top of him. "M'a clone..."

"Even clones get sick vod'ika..." Keeli whispered soothingly. "We're engineered, but not even we can remain strong forever."

"No... s'just me... M'broken..." Rex whined. The aching muscles and sore throat made it hard to say more, but Rex didn't have to. Keeli knew. " Came out wrong..."

"No you didn't."

"I did..." His eyes burnt and he could feel tears slip down his flushed face. Past shame making his stomach feel funny. "Wrong... Hair... Everyone's... Everyone sees... M'cooked up wrong..."

"Your hair doesn't make you wrong. It makes you unique." Keeli frowned. "And I'm sorry... I'm sorry that we dyed it back on Kamino. That we tried to hide it, and made you think it was something to be ashamed of. We just wanted to protect you..."

"Ori'vod..." He wanted to reach out and hold Keeli's hand. He still couldn't bring himself to do so. It was all so unbearably hot and his body wouldn't obey.

"It's ok Rex... Rest now. I'll see you again some day..."

"Stay... Please..." The sickly clone whimpered. "Don't go..."

"I can't vod'ika... I'm dead..."

Keeli wasn't there anymore. Rex was alone. His heart ached as he remembered. Remembered that nearly all his batch was gone. That he was one of the last.

"Don't leave!" His nerve shattered and he yelled through a strained throat. "Keeli don't leave me! Keeli!!!"

The curtains parted. Kix rushed to check up on his captain as his strangled and incoherent screams and sobs annihilated the peace and quiet of the medical wing. Rex was out of his mind with delirium and fear, the fever reeking havoc in his mind as his immune system fought the leftover effects of the plague.

It was hard to see his brother so distressed, but there was nothing more he could do besides sedate him and wait out the effects...

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3 years ago

angstpril day 4: he’s not heavy, he’s my brother

oh dear, oh dear. have some Umbara (derogatory)

(tw: major character death)

“Sir!” Waxer skids to a stop, out of breath. “I’ve found the platoon leader. He’s still alive.” The forest shivers around them, imaginary enemies blinking red eyes in the distance.

Cody hates it here. “Who is it?”

Waxer swallows and his face pales. “It’s—” he clutches the helmet in his hand tighter, duraplast creaking in his grip. “It’s Rex.”

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rex umbara

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2 years ago

I just thought of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad au where during Umbara it’s Rex that’s injured and he’s begging Kix to leave him behind so Kix can keep outrunning the tanks. And Kix still tells Rex he sounds like General Krell but he’s more frustrated and afraid than angry. Kix manages to group Rex with the rest of the wounded and Rex orders Kix to leave them behind and initially Kix is like no Fucking way I’m leaving you all out here but Rex reasons with him that he’s the only medic with the company right now and he had to keep moving with the group and Rex would keep an eye on and defend the rest of the wounded. At this point Kix knows he’s right so he leaves with them with a bunch of supplies and keeps going with Torrent. At the end of the battle when their recovering everyone’s like oh Kriff where’s Rex?! Did we loose him?! Is he dead?! And Kix speaks up and tells them he’s with the wounded, which spurts Fives and company to try and go back and look for them but in the name of progress and sacrifice Krell forbids it. He temporarily promotes Jesse to captain because i think at the time he was Rex’s lieutenant but mostly because Krell liked Jesse’s attitude more than he liked Five’s. The rest of the arc continues the way it originally did but with Jesse and fives at the lead. Meanwhile, Rex and like 25 other troops are lost in a foreign environment in the center of hostile territory on a planet far from any republic system, dwindling rations and medical supplies trying their best to live off the land for weeks. Rex had found a cave for the men to hide out in and made a camp there. Since he’s the captain and one of the least injured he goes out trying to locate and contact the gar while finding food and supplies. Between encounters with natural predators and Umbaran squads he always comes back more injured than he left. At this time Anakin gets back and he’s also like umm where’s Rex?? When the 501st tells him what happened he’s pissed and immediately goes out into the jungle to find Rex. And he does, just in time too because Rex had gotten his legs caught in a trap and was too injured to walk or fight and was surrounded by enemy Umbarans. Rex and the others wounded are rescued and get shipped of to a medical station for a while. When they get back hella comfort ensues and torrent is never letting Rex out of their sight again. Over the next few months however it’s clear that Rex has developed a significant amount of trauma and ptsd from the experience and is finding it hard to integrate back into and function within the gar.

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3 years ago

Screw Procedure

I heard it’s “whumptober”

Here’s a rare piece form Cody POV.

Warnings; blood, injuries, barbed wire, off-screen pain for Rex I’m sorry.

Day 1: barbed wire

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rex

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2 years ago

Clone Wars Headcanon: Rex seeing Fox die

Mmmm just Fox stuck in his mind and he’s attacking Rex and Rex tries to help, begging Fox to stop and break free but he can’t

Rex being put in a position where he ends up shooting Fox to defend himself

Fox having attacked Rex and cut his throat so Rex can’t speak and he couldn’t call for help and Rex was terrified … still is

Rex crawling to Fox and crying, shaking him and Fox is weak and he’s free from the control and he grabs Rex’s wrist and he tries to apologize but the words don’t come out, gurgled by blood

Maybe it’s Cody who finds him or Thorn

Maybe it’s one of the Jedi or maybe it’s no one

Rex is crying, hugging Fox’s body

If he could scream, he would but he can’t and no one is coming and it’s just him in this room with his Ori’vod’s body and he didn’t mean to kill him! He didn’t

Cody being the one to find him eventually, having been looking for Rex since that morning

Terror filling his body and he runs to the bodies and at first he thinks Rex is also dead but the small rise of Rex’s chest is enough for Cody to call a medic

Rex clings to Fox like it will burn him if he lets go and no matter the Vod who keep telling him it’s safe and he needs to let go, Rex doesn’t listen

He can’t leave Fox alone. Fox is his Ori’vod and he still has a duty to protect Rex and Rex doesn’t want him to go because if he lets go, he won’t see him again and Fox isn’t supposed to die and don’t take Fox away from him! Don’t take him away!

Cody prying Rex’s fingers loose and titling Rex’s head towards him and saying it’s okay Rex, you’re safe now. I’m still here

Rex staring at Cody with tears in his eyes and he can’t look away and his fingers tighten against Fox’s body as Cody continues to reassure him

Cody trying not to look at Fox, at the blood that pools around his body. Cody making sure to keep calm because Rex needs him and he can’t breakdown now

His vod’ika is covered in blood and Cody doesn’t know which is his and which is Fox’s and he’s trying so hard to ignore the body under Rex because if he looks, he won’t be able to help Rex and his vod’ika needs him right now

Cody just muttering in Rex’s ear, we need to go. You have to let go and it burns him to pry Rex’s fingers off of Fox but Rex needs a medic and it’s all he could do to lift Rex up and carry him to the medbay

Each step he takes feels like a betrayal, leaving Fox behind but Wolffe and Bly are there, taking care of him while Cody focuses on getting Rex help

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1 week ago

i love these two characters. i need to trap them in a collapsed building so they can talk about their feelings as one of them slowly bleeds out.

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3 years ago

That Cave You Call a Chest - postapocalyptic_cryptic - Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Star Wars - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex Characters: CC-2224 | Cody, CT-7567 | Rex, Obi-Wan Kenobi Additional Tags: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode: s04e13 Escape From Kadavo, Implied/Referenced Torture, Whipping, Caretaking, Platonic Cuddling, Protective CC-2224 | Cody, CC-2224 | Cody Has Issues, CC-2224 | Cody Needs a Hug, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, CT-7567 | Rex Whump, Hurt CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody has PTSD, Clone Trooper Mistreatment (Star Wars), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Slavery, Exhaustion, Aftermath of Torture Summary:

Cody and Rex after Kadavo.

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Kadavo fic that focuses on Rex my beloved

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1 year ago

Just One More For Sans Rest Day, @undertalethingems Made A Great List Of Drawing Ideas And I Really Loved

Just one more for Sans rest day, @undertalethingems made a great list of drawing ideas and I really loved the one of him and Alphys going to a museum to nerd out so I drew them into my local museum

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