My Favourite Angst Couple Dynamics (Unsaid Thoughts)

YQY: Qi-ge failed his Xiao Jiu... 😞😞😞

Ref:

More SotE memes upon thee

this might just be a tiktok issue but every time i see someone say “shen jiu deserved a chance at happiness!” i explode. he had many. his entire life he could’ve made different decisions, he could’ve just not abused lbh, or spoken to yqy, but he never did. that’s his whole thing. he’s even aware of it, it’s like his WHOLE final speech in the extras. he would NEVER EVER take a chance at being better/happy, he’s far too comfortable in his own misery, he has absolutely no idea what to do without it. and he doesn’t want to find out either. THATS THE WHOLE POINT. it’s what makes him such a good character, because he’s realistic in his principles. he doesn’t just hate the antagonist, he hates literally fucking everything and everyone, especially himself. makes me scream idk lmao

Cheeky!

Qi-ge has always been the center of Shen Jiu's world

He was what kept Shen Jiu going

His light in the dark

And seeing his Qi-ge whole and hale, after having not come back as promised, shattered his world

And Qi-ge's silence prevented it from ever healing. So the shattered pieces of his life spin and cut and hurt

And his instinct is that this perceived rejection is his fault. Because he is "rotten from the start".

He must be

Because he wished Qi-ge had died rather than abandon him

That's why there is always tension and quarrels

Because when Yue Qingyuan gets too close Shen Jiu gets angry

"How dare Qi-ge act like he cares! It's too little too late! Stop lying to my face!"

But if Yue Qingyuan pulls away Shen Jiu gets angry

"How dare Qi-ge abandon me again! Hasn't he run away enough!? Is he ashamed of me!?"

As long as Yue Qingyuan is silent the pain will continue

But Yue Qingyuan has reasons for not telling

For one, what he went through was as traumatic as what Shen Jiu went through. There are still blood stains from where he beat his head in the caves, desperate to get back to the center of his world.

He has to be ready to speak his truth

Secondly, he thinks it's a poor excuse. In his mind he should have tried harder, left earlier, done something different somehow and kept his promise. All his reasons, now matter how valid we see it, are weak and pathetic in his eyes

To tell Shen Jiu the truth would feel to Yue Qingyuan like he was making excuses for failing. He feels it would be insulting to Shen Jiu to even imply he has legitimate reasons for failing because he doesn't feel it was legitimate

So even though simply talking would heal the rift it's not as easy a fix as it seems

But unless they do Shen Jiu will continue to be shattered glass orbiting Yue Qingyuan

Hello 👋

Vetted by @90-ghost

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The way Yue Qingyuan is a strong and just person, except for when it comes to Shen Qingqiu at which point he is so full of remorse and guilt and would destroy himself in order to protect him- even to the point of going against his own beliefs.

Shen Jiu: That's it! You're head disciple!

Shen Yuan: I REFUSE!

Shen Jiu: Your refusal doesn't matter

Shen Yuan: This is ridiculous! I don't want to be head disciple! Make Ming Fan be Head Disciple

Shen Jiu: I am the Peak Lord of Qing Jing Peak and it is my decision and my decision alone who is or is not my head disciple and your objections and protestations are irrelevant

Shen Yuan: *quiet and threatening* Fine. I'll be Head Disciple. I'll be the best fucking Head Disciple this peak ever had

Shen Jiu: *also threatening* I look forward to it

Ning Yingying: ...I don't think that's how appointments of head disciples usually go.

(inspired by this post)

All my drawing time lately has gone into a school project so here's a bunch of very quick animal doodles I did to draw something less serious

sqq and yqy sure are acting strange today...........

(79 encounter a body swap... curse? flower? who knows)