It Could Be Because I Haven’t Slept In Too Long But I Kept Thinking Variations Of I Can’t Believe

- 3/30/2018 I kinda keep on forgetting to post

- 10.30.2018

- 1/03/2018 So after a while of drawing these I got tired of it and thought the only thing that improved was the eye brow placement. But after staring at it vs some older doodles it turns out I've really improved the stableness of all facial features

- 1/14/2018 Ughhh

I don’t think healthy people every really get chronic illness.

I have a friend I know from when we were both 6. She is the only person living nearby and so she saw me go from walking through limping to wheelchair on a daily basis. I keep her updated on my health even tho we rarely hang out anymore. She was gonna come over yesterday and I had to cancel. She asked if I can’t hang out later that day. When I said i won’t feel better later, that if I feel that bad in the morning later will only get worse she got annoyed and “joked” that I’m just finding excuses. And I was surprised, she knows all about me being disabled after all? So, a bit taken aback, I told her it’s a normal thing for me.

“But you got the diagnosis now, aren’t you better?? I thought you’ll get better now”

She was honestly surprised and it made me realize a thing. They don’t get it. They don’t get that getting diagnosed only equals benefits like welfare or parking spot for us, and sometimes better pain meds but that is just like pushing luck. That it’s a forever thing. That that one day we felt good a week ago was just a bright spot and doesn’t mean we won’t need our aids anymore, cause chronic illness is not linear and will make a great comeback in next four hours, and the next good day is planned on when we’re 70. Cause when abled people are sick, they get better. And our illness is just an excuse for them. And when we say we will never get better they think we’re being dramatic and pessimistic. And I don’t think they’ll ever get it, cause to get it you need to live it. And I want my friends to stay healthy and not go through hell.

- 3/15/2018

(5/04/2018) So it turns out I love this version of my art far more than I do the version I spent many, many… more hours working on… But yeah mermay is great (I’m not being sarcastic I’m really enjoying it)

[I posted three with a black, white or transparent background]

- 1/16/2018 Soooo wyvern frog, one of the coolest fantasy pet I've made up

- 6/03/2018

- 3/03/2018 While I drew all these on the third I'm posting it on the forth... my birthday. I'm a legal adult now 'squeals, (out of intense anxiety) but anyway I started the day by watching Erica birthday stream instead of sleeping including multiple hours of competitive erotic fanfics for charity... until 5 am