Sure Sex Is Cool But Have You Ever Thought About Vampires So Hard You Got Dizzy

yes

Festive gingerbread bats! With a link to the official Gothic Charm School recipe!

my thing with vampires doesn't even have the decency to be one of those childhood obsessions ("I roleplayed warrior cats on the playground and now I have a cat fursona" "I used to think I was a wizard as an undiagnosed nd kid and now I'm all about gandalf big naturals"), this happened to me in my early teens. it's barely even an academic interest, I got there eventually but I had to deliberately shoehorn it into my major. it's not even something respectable like a kink or other sick and twisted sexual perversion. no, this is something far, far worse.

Me and my sister have actually been bonding over the whole late/undiagnosed ADHD thing, and ever since I brought up to her that maybe she should get tested too, she's been spotting all sorts of Holy Shit How Did Nobody Notice signs about both of us. After finding out about stimulant resistance/paradoxal reaction, she pointed out that would explain why she's been hooked on coke (the drink, not the snorty stuff) and how I started my unfathomable coffee habit so early.

I started drinking a whole pot of coffee every day since I was like 10. I'd come home from school and brew myself a pot of coffee. I wasn't secretive about it and I was unaware that adults literally did not know that I was doing it, because by the time my parents got home from work in the evening, the whole pot would be gone.

The thing with ADHD is about a chemical imbalance in the brains, below average amounts of the kind of reward chemicals that prompt you to do anything. That's why procrastinating until last-minute panic is a regular habit - the task itself isn't just boring, it's intolerably tedious all the way until the adrenaline from the deadline panic boosts the brain to function on a - well, functional - level.

A lot of undiagnosed ADHD people unconsciously self-medicate with caffeine. I'm not a chemist, but as a mild stimulant, the caffeine gives you a boost that helps balance out the brain. Not as much as actually being medicated, but it's still better than nothing.

I didn't do it on purpose because it would "help me focus" on anything important or constructive - I didn't do my homework unprompted, not once, ever, since I was like 15 - but considering that nobody noticed a 10-year-old drinking a whole goddamn pot of coffee in the span of 4-5 hours every single day, one could conclude that it wasn't making me noticeably hyperactive.

I didn't drink coffee because I wanted a specific effect, though. As far as I was concerned I was drinking it because I liked it. And the reason why I started the habit in the first place was because at the time, I was reading a shit ton of Garfield comics for some reason and that orange cat managed to convince me that drinking a shit ton of coffee every day is cool. Anyway, the moral of the story is

me: *sees a ghost* omg are you dead

the ghost: of corpse

Autism Acceptance Month: Autistic Headcanons

↳ Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family)

“Well, you wouldn’t have got a sock on the eye if you hadn’t said your family was better than our family!”

The thing about ADHD is that the "lack of reward chemicals in your brain" doesn't just mean that you don't want to do any tasks that don't feel particularly yummy :(, it means that your brain will look at chores and tasks that need to be done like "doing this would be painful and tedious for absolutely nothing to gain from it, Do Not Do That." The same thing that your brain tells you about everything else that would feel really bad and hurt the entire time that you're dying. The part of your brain that stops you from doing the thing is the same part that keeps you from shoving your arm into a wood chipper.

With unmedicated, unmanaged ADHD, "I have to do this assignment or I fail and my life will be ruined and I die" feels like a SAW trap, every single time.

i love anathema

i think as a fandom we do not give anathema enough credit. first off. - my girl has a PhD at nineteen

- that's right, it's Dr. Anathema Device

- she carries a foot-long knife on her at all times

- her bike is called Phaeton. a phaeton is a type of carriage. it has two horses and an open roof

- her first word was nice, her second was accurate. her first sentence was this:

I tell ye thif, and I charge ye with my wordes. Four shalle ryde, and Four shalle alfo ryde, and Three sharl ryde the Skye as twixt, and Wonne shal ryde in flames; and theyr shall be no stopping themme: not fish, nor rayne, nor rode, neither Deville nor Angel. And ye shalle be theyr alfo, Anathema.

- she spells like it's the 1600s

- she looks 'vivacious' idek abt that one

- she drew on the title page of the Book. she DREW in THE NICE AND ACCURATE PROPHECIES OF AGNES NUTTER.

- I can't do better than the actual quote for this one:

"Other members of the family had said that Agnes made things obscure to conceal them from the understanding of outsiders; Anathema, who suspected she could occasionally think like Agnes, had privately decided that it was because Agnes was a bloody-minded old bitch with a mean sense of humor."

- she's an actual witch

- she's nineteen? like my girl is doing all that at NINETEEN.

- when she loses The Book she methodically looks for it, then chaotically looks for it, then melodramatically falls to her knees and bemoans the situation then looks around because DRAMATIC STRUCTURE dictates The Book should be there

Thanks for coming to my ted talk, Yours, an anathema fan.

tired of working hard gonna watch goth kids getting yelled at talk show hosts in the 90s