Only Just Seeing This Now, But Fae/Kiss… I Made A Whole Book Based Off Fae!Spiderbit

“You have six months to be married.”

Cellbit, not for the first time, wishes he was fucking dead. 

Looking Advisor Cucurucho right in their beady little eyes, Cellbit spins his pen between his fingers. 

“Oh,” says Cellbit, feigning innocence, “but I’m already engaged.”

(Because he is.)

Cucurucho just laughs, the fucker. They push their glasses up their nose with one finger, chuckling into the palm of their gloved hand. 

Cellbit’s pen goes still. 

They’re alone together in Cellbit’s study. Cellbit was reading over a document his sister had sent him for spell-checking, but he was so rudely interrupted by Cucurucho barging in and taking a seat opposite him at the desk with a triumphant grin on their shitty fucking face. 

They’re alone together in Cellbit’s study. Cellbit’s study is soundproofed. Cellbit’s study is at the far end of the royal palace with only his own bedchambers near it. Cellbit’s study locks from the inside, and only Cellbit has the key. 

Cellbit’s study has a sword hidden under the desk. 

Slowly, Cellbit leans back in his chair. He’s already covered in ink stains up to his elbows, what harm will a few bloodstains do? 

“As part of your dearly departed parents’ last will and testament,” Cucurucho explains, “you are required to marry by your twenty-first birthday.”

Cellbit nods as if he cares. “And if I don’t?”

Curucucho brushes their long, white, stupid hair out of their pale, white, stupid face. (They never cut it for “religious reasons”, but Cellbit knows that the only thing they worship is their own self-righteous ass.)

“Your sister, the queen, must put you to death,” Cucurucho says, voice perfectly level as if they aren’t in the process of ruining Cellbit’s life for, like, the millionth time. 

Cellbit rolls his eyes. “You know she wouldn’t.”

“Who do you think sent me here to talk to you?”

Briefly, Cellbit fantasizes of pulling the sword out from under his desk and cutting Cucurucho’s dumb fucking head off with it. It would get a mess all over his papers, but he has them memorized, anyway. He can just rewrite them. 

…But he does already have a reputation. He doesn’t think Bagi would forgive him if another angry mob showed up at the castle demanding his execution. (Cucurucho is more popular than he is, after all.)

So Cellbit just scowls and throws his pen right at Cucurucho’s dumb ugly smug face and pushes himself out of his chair. He storms past his desk and Cucurucho, buttoning up a few buttons on his shirt as he goes. (He is tired of all the servants staring at his chest, thanks.)

Cucurucho doesn’t move from their spot. 

“You can’t run away from this,” they calmly say, ignoring Cellbit grabbing his coat from off the back of a sofa. “She’ll just say the same thing as me.”

“Fuck you,” Cellbit growls. He pulls his coat on, trips over his own shoelace, knocks the study’s door open with his own head as he falls. 

Behind him, Cucurucho laughs. 

Cellbit flips them off. Fucker. 

“If you’re that worried about finding someone, there is a provision in the will stating that it would be perfectly acceptable for you to marry some member of the court,” Cucurucho calls. “Say, an advisor?”

Bastard. Fucker. Asshole. Gods-damned fucking-

Cellbit slams the door shut before he does something he’ll regret. 

Gods, he hates that person. 

-

Bagi is, as expected, literally and entirely against him. 

He found her in the throne room bullying a court jester for being too unfunny. He then kicked the jester out at swordpoint and turned on his sister with the same sword, demanding an answer. The guards lining the hall stood to attention and pointed their weapons at Cellbit, more than use to this behavior from him. 

But Bagi just shrugs and says, “It’s in their will. I might be the queen, but I can’t change it.”

Cellbit points his sword at her. Menacingly. 

“No,” he argues, very calm. And collected. And cool-headed. “But you’re the queen. And they’re dead.”

She rolls her eyes at him, entirely unconcerned. Lounging on her throne with her feet up and her crown hanging on a hook to the side, she’s the very picture of goddamn annoying. 

They lock eyes. 

After a solid minute of silent arguing, Cellbit groans and drops his sword to his side. He runs his hand through his hair, takes a step back, looks up at the ceiling, wishes he was dead, looks back at Bagi. Says: 

“I’m going to jump out the window.”

“Bet you won’t,” she quips. 

He responds by running towards the nearest window- stained glass, absolutely gorgeous, looking out over a solid forty-foot drop. He’s only stopped by a guard, his favorite guard, grabbing him around the middle and tugging him back, kicking and struggling, into the center of the room. 

“Sorry, bro, can’t let you do that,” Etoiles says, not sounding very apologetic at all, the bastard. 

Cellbit bites him. Etoiles laughs. Bagi sighs. 

“Is it really that bad?” she asks. “You probably won’t even see your spouse. Do you remember how many times we saw mom and dad together?”

“Never,” Cellbit admits.

“Exactly. Just marry someone and ignore them. You don’t even have to share a bedroom. You don’t even have to like them.”

Cellbit looks at her, appalled. His jaw drops in shock. 

“Excuse me?” he demands. “If I’m getting married, it’ll be someone I like. I’m-”

He finally manages to struggle out of Etoiles’ grip. He doesn’t run, though. He’ll try jumping again later; now, he has to argue, because, big surprise, his dumb idiot sister is being an idiot again. 

“I’m-” he repeats, approaching the throne as threateningly as possible, “-already engaged to someone I like.”

Bagi is not threatened. She’s used to this sort of behavior from him by now. (Again, Cellbit has a bit of a reputation in court.)

“Yeah,” she agrees, nodding sarcastically. “To an imaginary friend. From your childhood.”

She sighs, putting her face in her hands. 

Then, she looks up at Cellbit tiredly. 

“Do you hear yourself?” she asks. 

Cellbit huffs. Crosses his arms. Throws his hair out of his face with an appropriate amount of dramatism. 

“He’s real,” he insists. “And he’s the only person I’ll marry.”

“You,” Bagi declares, “are ridiculous.”

“No, I’m loyal.”

“Okay!” She slams her fist on the arm of her throne with a fake smile. “If your ‘fiancé’ is real, then… what’s his name?”

Cellbit opens his mouth. He closes his mouth. 

Satisfied, Bagi nods. “Mhmm. Loyal.”

Petulant, Cellbit looks away. 

Realizing the gravity of the situation, Cellbit heavily takes a seat on the steps leading up to the throne. His back is right against Bagi’s leg, so she can reach him easily. 

And reach him she does. She immediately starts braiding his hair the way she’s been doing for their entire lives, fingers gentle despite her irritation with him. 

“This,” Cellbit decides, “sucks.”

Bagi hums in agreement. 

“Trust me,” she says, “I’d ignore this if I could. But Cucurucho is adamant about-”

Cellbit scoffs, “Oh, Cucurucho is adamant, are they? Are they the queen?”

Bagi pulls at his hair. “Jackass. You know they have a lot of pull in court. I’ve only been queen for a couple of months, they’ve been working here since before we were born.”

“Then we should execute them and all their friends.” 

At a second pull of his hair, Cellbit yelps, “I don’t know! I’m brainstorming!”

“You’re stupid! Do you want a revolution?”

“...Do you want me to answer truthfully?”

A third hair pull. Cellbit yowls just briefly before going quiet; he’s been his sister’s doll long enough to know when to shut up. 

So, he thinks. 

And he thinks. 

And he thinks. 

And, then, he has a brilliant idea. 

“Let’s have a contest,” he proposes. 

Bagi makes a noise: ‘Continue’.

Drumming his fingers against his knee, Cellbit explains, “If I’m going to marry someone, it won’t just be anybody. I’ll have to like him. So he’ll have to be my type.”

“Do you even have a type?” Bagi dryly asks. 

Cellbit bites back a, “Yes, obviously, I just can’t remember him.”

Instead, he says, “He’ll have to be clever. I need to be able to solve enigmas with him.”

“Of course.”

“And he’ll need to be strong. I work with the royal guard, he’ll need to keep up with me.”

“Makes sense.”

“And he’ll have to have some amount of personality. I’m not just going to marry someone because they’re smart and strong. He needs to be able to make me laugh.”

“Fair,” Bagi says. “So, what, you want me to put out an announcement to the neighboring kingdoms?”

He shakes his head, mindful of the ongoing braiding effort. 

“I want everybody to have a chance,” he says. “Not just royalty or nobility.”

(Because, he thinks, his stable boy won’t have become a prince over the last eleven years.)

“Cucurucho won’t like that,” Bagi warns. 

Cellbit scoffs, “Cucurucho should be happy that I’m even going to marry someone.”

“Well… if you’re sure, I’ll make it happen. But you need to figure the details out. It’s your wedding, not mine.”

Cellbit just smiles in response. 

(If he doesn’t show up, then Cellbit will just sneak out during the honeymoon to find him. 

Easy.)

-

To Be Continued...

Double Life: Far Too COLD!!

2/6 of my PearlescentMoon Double Life Thumbnail series for my Illustration class. Episode 2’s thumbnail is one of my favorites, thank you to (youtuber/artist) GenrihG for inspiration!

Each illustration is sketched in red colored pencil, colored with watercolor and gouache, and lined with red ink. For this project, I focused on different coloring and shading techniques. (I also wanted to highlight different story elements, so heres freezing Pearl and the lovely Tilly baby.)

I Find Safety Here

Mediums: Ink, Watercolor, Gouache, Gelpen

Fuck it, Spiderbit Week!

I think we deserve another Spiderbit Theme Week to make us all feel just a little bit happier, don't you?

The same rules as last time apply. Pick a prompt, create! Tag me on Tumblr, but post wherever you like! This is a community event, have fun with it!

The first day is the 21 of July. Don't feel obligated to do every day (I probably won't), but do what you want to do! Just remember to have fun, that's what is most important.

Double Life: Umm… Opps?

4/6 of my PearlescentMoon Double Life Thumbnail series for my Illustration class. Episode 4 has the most difficult pose of all the thumbnails (as my professor would fondly remember), but I love the final result.

Each illustration is sketched in red colored pencil, colored with watercolor and gouache, and lined with red ink. For this project, I focused on different coloring and shading techniques.

*stares at the Spiderbit/Guapoduo line art from yesterday* Time to paint I guess

Leo Bonita & Richas are back! So it seems like the perfect time to reveal my graduation cap design.

(I’m so excited to graduate and have more time to make egg art again! One more art final!)

Spiderbit Week Day 2

(Except I just finished my art finals- so I finally have time and no deadlines. Thank you for lovely prompts)

Prompt list by @anonymous-dentist

Prompt: Stars, Festa Junina is one of my favorite days on the server so had to paint it finally

Double Life: Complete CONFUSION

What’s this? A double life anniversary? Seems a perfect time for another thumbnail then!

3/6 of my PearlescentMoon Double Life Thumbnail series for my Illustration class. Episode 3 was full of so many fun moments, but I really wanted to paint Revenge. I also love the composition, as Pearl is between Scott and Cleo’s house!

Each illustration is sketched in red colored pencil, colored with watercolor and gouache, and lined with red ink. For this project, I focused on different coloring and shading techniques.

Double Life: Work In Progress

A small look as I put the final details of illustration 5/6 of my PearlescentMoon Double Life Thumbnail series.