Cowboy Sukuna (Part 1)
Sukuna became a cowboy so he wouldn't have to let anyone tell him what to do. And because he wanted to put some distance between himself and his little brother so Sukuna wouldn't drag him into his mess. Sukuna is made for the lonesome cowboy life. He doesn't need anyone by his side. He isn't looking for love. At least that's what he thinks until he meets you, a pretty girl in a flowery dress and cowboy boots who somehow knows how to tear Sukuna's walls down.
Cowboy!Sukuna x Reader (female) Genre: Cowboy AU, fluff + smut Word Count: 7.5k Playlist: Cowboy Sukuna Warnings: 18+, smut, cigarettes, alcohol, fistfights, blood. Minors don't interact. This story is inspired by @sweetlandspos fanart of Cowboy Sukuna (also this is the selfie he sends Reader). I saw him and fell in love, and I just HAD to write a story about this sexy cowboy. Divider @/benkeibear. The art in the header was used with permission from @/sweetlandspos
Sukuna grew up thinking he belonged nowhere. He can't even remember his dad and his mama didn't want him either. He was raised by his grandpa, but Sukuna was a wild one, a rebel and troublemaker, famous in his small town but for all the wrong reasons. He got all those tattoos when he was far too young, got into all those fistfights, broke all those hearts, and even got into trouble with the cops once. His gramps told Sukuna he was a bad influence on his little brother, so when Sukuna was old enough, he left it all behind and bought this old ranch in the middle of nowhere.
He renovated the old farmhouse all by himself and built his own life out here. A life he could be proud of. It's a lonely life. No wife, no kids, not even a girlfriend. Just Sukuna and his dog and horse and the cows. And lots of hard work. But it's what Sukuna tells himself he wants. The bad boy cowboy never even considered getting married. He doesn't think he is made for love. He isn't even sure he deserves it or is capable of it. Sukuna enjoys life out here in the middle of nowhere and tells himself he doesn't need anyone by his side, anyway.
If he wants to fuck, he can drive to town and flirt his way into some pretty girl's bed. It's never anything serious. Just a few hours of fun and then Sukuna is gone again. No goodbye kiss, no exchange of phone numbers. The only thing he leaves behind are some muddy bootprints on her front porch, and some cigarette ash flicked out of his car window.
Sukuna doesn't expect to ever find love or even want to find it. And he certainly doesn't think that he will meet his future wife on a random Tuesday morning in the shabby old hardware store he has been frequenting for years.
He got into his pickup truck at sunrise, driving several hours to the small town to buy some things in the hardware store, and that's where he runs into you, a sweet little thing in a flowery dress and pretty cowboy boots, wringing your hands nervously when Sukuna has some questions regarding the pond supplies he wants to buy.
He grins at you, taking his cowboy hat off and nodding at you respectfully, all polite because contrary to what he looks like with all his tattoos and the intimidating height and muscular build, he can be a gentleman if he wants to, and you seem like such a sweetheart, Sukuna thinks you deserve his best charming self.
You tell him it's your first day working here and you have to check with your boss. You apologize profusely to Sukuna, and he can't stop the smirk from spreading over his tattooed face because you are so damn cute.
He tells you, "It's okay, ma'am, I have time.", and watches you get all flustered before you hurry to the back of the store.
You return a few minutes later with a warm smile on your face and answer Sukuna's questions, showing him around and also helping him pick some other things he says he needs (which he doesn't, but he likes the way you smile at him and the way your sweet flowery perfume fills his nose anytime you move).
You even insist on helping him load the items into his pickup truck,
"See it as compensation for my earlier lack of fishing pond knowledge."
And Sukuna laughs and thanks you,
"There is nothing you have to compensate for. I am very pleased with your service."
He eyes the nameplate attached to your dress and addresses you by your name, letting it roll off his tongue in his low, velvety voice that he knows girls find sexy. Sukuna can see that you are affected by his charm, and he grins broadly at you when he tips his cowboy hat in a farewell. And you smile so sweetly at him, and Sukuna is pretty sure you really mean it when you tell him to come back again soon.
Sukuna is back in town only a week later, picking up a new saddle he ordered at the local saddler, but he drives past the hardware store on his way back, and something makes him slow down, makes him take one last deep drag from his cigarette and then flick the cigarette butt out the open window before Sukuna pulls into the small parking lot.
Sukuna tells himself it's a good idea to have a little look around when he already made the long drive into town anyway. He could use a new toolbox. The old one is still functioning, but this new one comes with a sweet girl in a cute little skirt and those shiny cowboy boots. Sukuna spends thirty minutes in the little shop until he finally sees you coming out from the back.
Your gaze meets his, and he sees the way your eyes widen just as Sukuna grins at you, tipping his cowboy hat in greeting and casually strolling over to you.
You smile brightly at him, remembering him (Of course you do. Sukuna knows he always leaves an impression), greeting him by his name, and asking him how you can be of help.
Sukuna cocks his head, a lazy smirk spreading over his handsome, tattooed face, letting his gaze travel over your pretty face and cute curves, thinking that he definitely knows some things you could help him with. He is pretty sure he could have you in his truck in no time at all, his calloused hands slipping under your cute little skirt while your pretty mouth moans his name. But something makes him hold back.
It's untypical for Sukuna. He drove all the way to town and will only be here for a few hours. Usually, he makes good use of that time to get his fill of some sweet pussy wrapped around his cock to keep him satisfied for the long lonely nights to come once he is back home again, riding over the plains, herding his cows.
But Sukuna looks at your sweet smile and your genuine kindness, and it doesn't feel right to only fuck you and then leave again to never see you again.
And so Sukuna doesn't try to get under your skirt but instead leans down to grin at you and ask you to help him pick a nice new toolbox.
He walks out of the store an hour later, not just with a new toolbox but also a new BBQ grill, some lawn chairs, and a saddle bag he could have gotten in much better quality at the saddler he just came from. But it's okay because it meant that he could spend a whole hour with you in the shitty little hardware store, letting you show him around, talking to him in your sweet voice with the thick accent, while Sukuna watched your little skirt sway around your knees.
You accompany him to his truck again, and Sukuna smirks at you like the devil that he is, asking in a teasing voice,
"Is this some new service your store offers? Helping every customer load their stuff into their cars? Or is this a special service just for me?"
His smirk grows bigger when he sees how flustered you get once again, and he adds,
"No need to get all shy on me, sweetheart. I like being your favorite customer."
You giggle nervously but smile that bright smile at him again and quickly ask him where he lives and what he's doing for a living. And Sukuna laughs and points at his cowboy hat,
"This is what I'm doing. The hat isn't just a sexy accessory."
"Oh? So you're really a cowboy?"
"Yeah, as real as you can meet one. I have my own ranch a few hours from here. Just me and my animals."
You smile at him, getting a slightly dreamy look in your eyes, telling him,
"That sounds nice."
Sukuna doesn't know why his chest feels so fluttery and warm the whole drive home. He even catches himself humming along softly to one of those stupid, catchy lovesongs playing on the country station on his shitty old car radio.
Cowboy Sukuna doesn't know what it is, but lately, he keeps coming to town more often than usual. It's Friday night, and he's sitting in the small bar with the roses on the wooden sign above the old-fashioned saloon doors.
Sukuna is drinking whiskey with some rancher who wants to buy several cows from him, when Sukuna suddenly sees you. All pretty and sexy without knowing it, in your blue jeans and the cropped blouse, laughing unrestrainedly with your girls after a long work day.
Sukuna can't take his eyes off you. He watches you over the rim of his whiskey glass, feeling that strange warmth in his chest again. He's about to put his glass down and walk over to you when he sees a guy bump into you.
The asshole is acting as if it was by accident, but he is far too handsy for Sukuna's taste. Standing much too close to you, his shoulders brushing against yours, his mouth at your ear, saying something to you.
Sukuna grits his teeth.
You smile politely at the guy, laughing awkwardly, not at all like when you laugh with Sukuna. You are uncomfortable. That much is clear to see, but Sukuna can tell you are a good girl who was taught to always be nice and polite, even to that guy with the grabby hands. That pathetic worm puts a hand on your hip, and Sukuna sees red.
He slams his whiskey glass down on the table and crosses the small bar in a few large steps, grabbing that handsy guy and pulling him off you with an angry growl. Sukuna slams him into the wall, glaring at him, his voice low and dangerous,
"Get your dirty hands off her, or I'll fucking kill you!"
Your wide, surprised eyes stare at Sukuna, and that nameless guy screams and tries to punch him, but Sukuna just laughs about the pathetic attempt and drags him further away from you, grabbing him by the collar as Sukuna's right fist connects with the asshole's face.
Sukuna has always been good at fistfights. He is a rough guy, a dirty fighter, sadistic when someone pisses him off. He tried to stay out of trouble those last few years, but tonight, he is not restraining his anger, not when it comes to protecting you.
He smirks devilishly at the guy when that asshole manages to land a hit on Sukuna's face. It just manages to rile Sukuna up even more. He laughs and taunts that loser for hitting like a little boy before Sukuna attacks again and sends the guy tumbling to the floor with the next hard punch.
It's then that your small, soft hands wrap around Sukuna's tattooed biceps, and your sweet voice says his name with so much worry that it makes Sukuna stop going after that guy on the floor. He just jerks his head at the guy, telling him to get lost,
"If you know what's good for you, you better stay a mile away from that sweet lady in the future. Now apologize to her."
And the guy scrambles to his feet, mumbling a sorry before he flees from the bar and from Sukuna.
Sukuna slowly turns around, running a tattooed hand through his pink hair. He wipes his split lip on his sleeve, gives you a lopsided grin, and asks if you are okay.
And you stare at him with big, worried eyes, taking in the blood on his tattooed face, but a small smile plays around your lips as you tell Sukuna,
"Thank you for getting him away from me. I am fine... but what about you? Your lip... let me fix that, please."
You take Sukuna's large hand in your smaller one, tugging gently on it, and Sukuna follows you out of the bar.
You lead him down the road to your small house, inviting him in, not to have sex with him, but to patch him up, and somehow it feels a lot more intimate than all the times combined that Sukuna went home with another girl.
You are so sweet to him, scolding him for getting into a fight and getting himself hurt, but your fingers are so gentle when you wipe the blood off Sukuna's face and put a band-aid on his split lip. You smile softly as you trace the tattoos on Sukuna's jaw with your fingers and whisper a thank you to him.
"Thank you for protecting me from that guy and teaching him a lesson. You're a good guy."
And Sukuna laughs roughly, grinning at you and shaking his head,
"That's a first. Usually, I get called the opposite."
And you laugh with him, your soft fingers still cupping his chin and touching his tattoos oh so gently, insisting that even though he looks like a bad boy, Sukuna seems really nice.
Sukuna is so close to just pulling you on his lap and kissing you, but he refrains from doing it. Because he knows where it would lead, and for once in his life, Sukuna doesn't want a one-night stand. He doesn't want to fuck you and then drive back to his life out on the ranch to never see you again.
He doesn't want that with you. He wants to see you again, and he wants to take things slow. He wants to court you in an old-fashioned way.
Sukuna eats the homemade pie you bring him and drinks the coffee you insist he should drink before he drives back home. He thanks you politely for playing nurse for him and for feeding him, looking at you with the most charming smile he can give you with his split lip. And you tell him he is welcome and that he knows now where to find you if he ever needs someone to patch him up again.
Sukuna returns a week later to the hardware store, not because he needs to buy anything, but for you. He sees you smile when you spot him leaning casually against a wooden fence display, twirling his cowboy hat in his fingers and smirking that lazy grin at you.
You only have eyes for him, forgetting what you want to say to the customers you are serving. Looking at them in confusion and stuttering an excuse before your gaze wanders back to Sukuna. And Sukuna's smirk grows bigger.
He didn't even dress nice. He is just wearing his typical black jeans and cowboy boots, and one of the flannel shirts he always wears on the ranch. But he knows he looks good anyway. Sukuna knows the ladies love his handsome face and his tall and strong body with all those well-defined muscles from all the hard work. And his pink hair and tattoos are very popular with the country girls, too. They all get weak in the knees for a bad boy like Sukuna.
But somehow, he doesn't want to be a bad boy when it comes to you. A strange warmth spreads through Sukuna's chest when you leave the other customers standing and come over to him with that big smile on your pretty face, greeting him and telling him that it's nice to see him again.
No, Sukuna doesn't want to be an asshole or a bad boy when it comes to you. He wants to be a good man for you. He is polite to you, sweet, and respectful. A true cowboy and gentleman.
He grins his boyish grin at you, cocking his head and drawls,
"I thought I should stop by to check on you. Make sure there aren't any weird guys I have to fistfight for you."
Sukuna flirts with you and makes you laugh and giggle until your boss gives you side eyes and informs you that you shouldn't pester customers. But Sukuna turns to the man, towering over him,
"She is just helping me decide which products to buy. You shouldn't berate her but rather give her a raise. This sweet lady is the best thing about this shitty store. The only reason I keep coming back."
You burst out laughing the moment your boss has left and Sukuna thinks his stomach has never felt so fluttery. He asks you when your shift is over and if he can take you out for dinner. He is delighted when you say yes.
Sukuna waits until your shift is over and then leads you to his old pickup truck, holding open the door for you, giving you a hand, and helping you climb into it. His hand rests a bit longer than necessary on the small of your back, but you don't seem to mind.
He takes you to a cozy little restaurant that he has been to several times before. Always alone because Sukuna never went on dates in the past. But the elderly lady who owns the restaurant always tells Sukuna that she knows the type of cowboy Sukuna is from the time when she was still a young girl.
"Oh, I have had several boys like you in my life. Y'all are such handsome devils, but always breaking hearts everywhere you go because you are always running from something, and you don't even know from what. I wish for you to find the right girl one day. And if you do, bring her here."
And now Sukuna is here with you, walking into the restaurant with his arm wrapped lightly around you, catching the knowing gaze of the old lady behind the counter. She leads the two of you to a table on the patio, all romantic with wildflowers in a mason jar and fairy lights overhead.
Sukuna has never been on a real date, but he likes this. He likes to be here with you, chat with you, laugh with you, and hold your hand on the table, watching his long tattooed fingers interlace with your smaller ones, which feel so soft.
The hours slip by without either of you noticing how late it is.
When it is time to bring you home, Sukuna drives you to your house, parks the truck in front of it, and turns to you to say the typical flirty stuff that he usually says to girls, but he stops when he sees your smile, and somehow anything he usually says seems so hollow and fake, and it wouldn't be right to say it to you.
Sukuna closes his mouth again, gulping hard, the bad boy cowboy at a loss for words for the first time in his life.
This feeling is new to Sukuna. All of this is new to him. This warmth in his chest and the fluttery feeling in his stomach. And how he is so damn scared to fuck things up and lose you before you even are his.
How can Sukuna even say anything at all to you when everything he wants to tell you is so fucking raw and loaded with feelings he has never felt before? When it all makes him feel so fucking vulnerable?
Like the fact that Sukuna really enjoys spending time with you and that he wants to see you again. Or that he is pretty sure he gets butterflies when hearing your laugh. Or that he never believed in love, but he thinks he is starting to do it now.
He can't say those things, can he?
In the end, it doesn't need any words from him. You smile at him and thank him for the lovely evening, adding a bit shyly that you aren't used to going on dates, and then stutter because you realize what you said and you are worried that it wasn't really a date and you made a fool of yourself by assuming it was one.
And Sukuna can't help but grin and then do the one thing that will shut you up and hopefully ease your worries:
He kisses you right there in his truck. Cups your chin with his calloused hand and brushes his lips softly over yours. Careful, gentle. Something Sukuna usually isn't, but you bring out some part of him that was dormant until now.
Sukuna wants this kiss to be special. He wants to be gentle with you because you are gentle with him, too. You are sweet and kind. You treat him as if he is deserving of tenderness.
You make a cute, surprised sound, but don't pull away. Instead, your hand lands on Sukuna's neck, caressing the short stubble of his undercut, pulling him closer as your lips begin to move against his, too, and Sukuna can't help but smile into the sweetest kiss he ever had.
When the two of you pull apart again, Sukuna smiles at you, a genuine, soft smile, and tells you,
"It was absolutely a date. And I had a lovely evening, too, princess. Let me take you out to dinner again soon."
Sukuna watches you get out of his truck and walk to your front door. He lifts a hand to give you a little wave when you turn around in the open doorway to smile at him once again, whisper-shouting to him that you wish him a safe drive home.
Sukuna stays in his truck outside your house until the light in your living room goes on, and he knows you are safe and sound before he finally pulls out of your driveway and makes his long way home, his thoughts filled with your smile and the taste of your sweet lips and tongue in his mouth.
Sukuna stays true to the promise he made to himself and really takes things slow with you. He has to work anyway, look after his ranch, fix some fences, and ride across the plains, where he meets no other human being for several days. But you are on his mind the whole time.
He sends you pictures from his rides when he is lucky and gets a signal. Selfies of him on horseback, grinning at you with a cigarette dangling from the corner of his lips. And some pics of some of his cows, smiling when you ask for their names.
"They don't have names. I just numbered them. But you can give them names if you like, sweetheart."
And you do. You send Sukuna the stupidest names you can think of, and he can't stop grinning,
"I sure hope you won't be in charge of naming any kids."
"Well, I will let their daddy help choose the names if he has such a problem with my name-giving skills."
And Sukuna's head spins at the implication. You're a tease in such a sweet way, and it drives him completely insane.
But Sukuna knows he drives you crazy for him, too. He knows that as much as you like the normal pictures he sends you, you also love the thirst traps he blesses you with.
The pictures where he is shirtless, all his tattoos and defined muscles on display for you, sweat glistening on his strong body, his faded, ripped jeans sitting low on his hips and doing nothing to hide the massive bulge throbbing in them.
You send him pictures, too, not as shameless as the thirst traps Sukuna sends you, but enough to drive him crazy. He has never held himself back so long, but damn, he thinks you are worth all the hard-ons he has and only his own hand to take care of them. Sure, Sukuna could drive to the next bar and find a random girl to ease that pressure, but he doesn't want it. There is only one girl he wants.
Sukuna can wait. He knows you are worth it.
And as much as he wants to have you under him, leaving scratches on his back and squealing his name in pleasure, he also wants to just talk to you or maybe take you on a little ride on his horse.
He calls you every night just to hear your voice and ask about your day, laughing about all the rude customers at the hardware store. Sukuna asks you what you had for dinner and listens to all the latest gossip your mama told you. Sometimes, he falls asleep while listening to your sweet voice and sees a text from you in the morning telling him that he sounds cute when he snores.
Maybe that's ruining the bad-boy reputation that Sukuna has all over your small town, but he doesn't give a fuck. You can see this other side of him. You are the exception, and he finds that he likes that.
Sukuna visits the town as often as his ranch duties allow so he can take you on dates. Sometimes, he drives his old pickup truck, but sometimes, he takes his motorcycle, grinning at you when he parks it in front of your house and takes off his helmet, running a hand through his ruffled hair to smooth it down again, and telling you to come hop on so he can take you on a ride. And you raise an eyebrow jokingly,
"When you said you are a cowboy, I pictured a guy on a real horse..."
And there is this happy sparkle in your eyes, and that sweet laugh falling from your lips. And fuck, Sukuna knows he is a lost man.
He grins back at you, leaning down to greet you with a slow, deep kiss before he holds out his helmet to you,
"This cowboy will let you ride his horse soon, too, but for now, let me show you a bit more horsepower."
Sukuna loves the feeling of your body snuggling against his back, your hands wrapped tightly around his waist, your hands caressing his chest and his abs through his shirt, and your loud, excited laugh when Sukuna accelerates his bike and speeds down the dirt road leading to nowhere, leaving a cloud of dust and dirt behind.
Sukuna parks his motorcycle at a pretty pond and spreads out a picnic blanket in the grass. The two of you sit down to eat something, but it only takes a few minutes before the snacks are forgotten, and Sukuna rolls on top of you and kisses you until he feels dizzy, and you sigh into his mouth.
When you look up at him and touch his face, trace his tattoos with your fingertips, and smile at him, Sukuna knows that he has never been this genuinely happy in his life. But at the same time, it scares him. It terrifies him to feel so much.
He strolls down to the pond, smoking a cigarette while looking over the smooth surface of the water, trying to calm down and stop his fears from swallowing him. Trying to stop that voice in his head that whispers to him that this cowboy should do what he is best at and just run and isolate himself and live his life in solitude.
But your sweet laugh carries to Sukuna's ears as you run towards him, pulling him out of his dark thoughts. Your small hand wraps around his tattooed biceps, and you lean against his side,
"Hey cowboy, come back. I have some homemade lemonade and cake in my bag."
Sukuna turns his head to look at you, at the way you tilt your head to smile up at him, eyes full of affection. How could he walk away from this? Yeah, he is scared out of his mind of all those feelings, but he would regret it even more if he ran.
He blows out his cigarette smoke slowly as a lazy grin spreads over his face, and he leans down to press a kiss on your forehead.
"Homemade lemonade? You sure know the way to my heart, huh, princess?"
He lets you take his hand and pull him back to the picnic blanket, sipping your lemonade and letting you climb in his lap and feed him the cake you baked for him, and Sukuna wraps his arms around your waist, capturing your lips in a sweet, sexy kiss, hoping you can understand the silent promises his tongue writes against yours.
All the words he doesn't dare say out loud because they scare him. But Sukuna knows it's you for him. He knows that he wants by his side. He knows you are his girl and hopes he is your boy, too. He hopes he is a man who is deserving of you and your sweetness. Sukuna promises you silently that he will work damn hard to be that man.
It takes weeks before the two of you have sex.
Sukuna takes you on another date with his old truck this time, driving far out to watch the stars with you and lying in the bed of his truck with you in his arms.
He brought you flowers. The wild ones which grow on his ranch because he feels like you enjoy them more than the ones from the flower shops, and it makes him happy to see you with something from his life.
You thanked him with a sweet kiss and put some of the flowers in your hair, laughing when they fell out again, and Sukuna picked them up again and tucked them behind your ear.
And now those flowers are already out of your hair again, strewn all over the truck bed because the two of you are so lost in your deep tongue kisses and the feeling of your bodies grinding against each other.
The flowers are forgotten, just like the stars above. The only thing you know is each other's mouths and hands that tug on each other's clothes, craving more, needing skin-on-skin contact.
Sukuna's shirt has been long gone, and yours too, leaving you only in your lacey bra and the little skirt, driving Sukuna crazy. Your hands explore the naked skin of his broad back and his biceps, and your lips trail sweet kisses down Sukuna's neck, leaving your lipstick marks on him.
And Sukuna licks and kisses the swell of your breasts above your bra, finally pulling the pretty lacey thing down to reveal your even prettier tits. He sucks one nipple into his warm mouth as he looks up at your face, grinning when he sees your eyelashes flutter and hears the cute little noises you make for him.
You straddle Sukuna's lap, smiling at him with desire burning in your eyes while your small hands wander a bit shyly over his tattooed chest, and Sukuna thinks he will lose his mind if he doesn't finally take you.
He flips you over on your back, pushes his head under your skirt, and eats you out until your legs are shaking and your hands tug on his pink hair, and you cry out his name into the night.
You look up at Sukuna with parted lips and heavy-lidded eyes as you unbutton his jeans and get his achingly hard cock out, stroking him lovingly while you tell him to please make you his girl.
Sukuna has held back for so long but cannot do it anymore. Not when you look at him like that and stroke his cock like that and ask him to claim you. He pushes you down on the truck bed, his arms on each side of your head, his heavy body on top of yours, his lips claiming yours in a possessive, hungry kiss at the same time as his cock claims your sweet, warm pussy.
He takes you with hard, rough thrusts, fucking you almost feverishly once he feels your warm pussy around his cock. And for the first time in his life, Sukuna apologizes for the way he fucks. For his roughness, for his strength. But you cling to him and moan his name and tell him it's okay and that you want him exactly like this.
You leave scratches on Sukuna's back, and he fucks his seed into you over and over again. The two of you can't get enough of each other that night, making out and fucking in various positions until the sky becomes pink with the approaching sunrise, and both of you are sated and exhausted, and you slump against Sukuna's body, hugging him, pressing your tits firmly against his tattooed chest as his spent cock softens gradually inside you.
Sukuna lets his head fall back on the truck bed, his large hands lazily caressing your back, and he looks up at the sky that brings a new morning, thinking that it feels like it's a whole new life that is beginning today.
He drives you back to town an hour later, stealing glances at you the whole drive long, one tattooed hand resting on your naked thigh under your skirt, and your small hand lands on top of Sukuna's, caressing the back of his hand while you sing along to the country songs on the radio. Sukuna can't stop grinning the whole time.
But even after you start to have sex with each other, you still take time to get to know each other even better. It's fun and sexy but also deep and meaningful, and Sukuna catches himself being more open with you than he ever was with anyone before.
He tells you the truth when you ask about his family, tells you that it's messy, that he can't even remember his dad, and that his mama didn't want him either. He tells you about his little brother, who he hasn't seen in many years because Sukuna ran from home the moment he was 18. He confesses all the shit he did. All the stupid things a rebellious teenage Sukuna got involved in. All the trouble and pain he caused his family. All the regrets he has, when he looks back at his former life now.
And you take his large hand into both of yours and hold it so gently, and smile that sweet smile at him, telling him that sometimes families simply are like that. A mess.
You tell him that you like him the way he is, with all his rough edges, and that you wish Sukuna had more love in his life when he needed it the most as a child.
"But you have me now, Kuna. And I will make sure you don't feel alone."
You tear down his walls so easily, break him in the most beautiful way, and build him up again, even stronger than before, because now Sukuna knows what it feels like to be loved.
And Sukuna says those famous three words for the first time in his life.
He pulls you to him, holds you in his arms, and rests his chin on your head, swaying you softly from side to side as he murmurs those words into your hair, words he never thought he would say,
"I love you. And I want to be with you. I know it's hard to love a man like me, but I want this to work. I want you. I want us. And I will work hard for it."
He thinks he will melt when you tell him you love him too and that there is nothing hard about loving him at all.
For the first time in his life, Sukuna stays in someone's bed the whole night.
The two of you kiss at your front door, and you gently pull him inside. You kiss and laugh and playfully tease each other all the way to your bedroom, undressing each other on the way, leaving behind a trail of clothes on your floor.
You call him baby, and Sukuna thinks he will go crazy. He picks you up and carries you the rest of the way until he lays you down on your bed, his lips never leaving yours.
You don't fuck that night but make love, nice and slow. You look so beautiful lying under Sukuna, your face so close to his, your small hands caressing his biceps and his muscular back while Sukuna takes you with slow, deep thrusts, unable to tear his gaze away from you and the love in your eyes when you whisper his name.
Sukuna tells you he loves you again when he is about to cum, and it feels more intense than anything else he has ever experienced. Especially when he feels you cum on his cock, too, sobbing his name and returning the "I love you" several times while you shudder in pleasure beneath him.
Sukuna doesn't let go of you the whole night. He lets you use his chest as your pillow, wraps you in his strong arms, and holds you. The wild, freedom-loving cowboy who usually runs, suddenly all tame.
Sukuna thinks he is right where he should be. He wants to stay forever in your bed and in your arms, holding the girl he loves.
Of course, a cowboy like Sukuna has to leave again in the morning. His ranch needs him. There are miles and miles of fences to fix, horses to train, and cattle to herd. But Sukuna promises to call you every night.
"And if I don't have a signal, I want you to know that I will still think of you, okay princess? Let's make a deal. Every night at ten pm, I want you to look at the sky. And I'll do the same, wherever I am, and imagine you are by my side."
And he laughs softly and hugs you to his strong body, adding,
"I will think about you every second of the day anyway. And I am damn sure you can't get me out of your mind either, huh?"
He winks at you and grins his boyish grin, and you chuckle and get on your tiptoes to kiss his grin off him.
Before Sukuna drives off, you give him a leather cord with a small charm in the form of a horseshoe, telling him you saw it on the farmers market last weekend and thought of him.
"I want to give it to you because I hope it will bring you luck and keep you safe out there on all those lonely nights and long rides."
And Sukuna leaves his bandana at your place,
"So you have something to remind you of me while I am away, princess. Wear it around your pretty throat to keep the chilly winds away and to think of your favorite cowboy."
Sukuna calls you every day just like he promised.
But out here on the plains, where Sukuna is on horseback, with only his dog running along beside him, his life still feels lonely. This solitude used to be something Sukuna chose willingly for himself. Something he thought was the only life that was right for a man like him.
But now Sukuna feels this longing inside his chest, and the questions keep filling his mind. Does a cowboy really have to be alone? Does Sukuna really have to be alone?
His ranch and his life out here are the last parts of him, which Sukuna hasn't opened to you yet. It seemed too risky to bring you here, too intimate. This is the place, after all, where Sukuna fled to so he wouldn't hurt his little brother anymore. A place he used to see as some kind of fortress that kept other people safe from Sukuna and also kept him safe from feeling too much. A place where he was free from all the complications of human interactions.
But things have changed, haven't they?
Sukuna visits you as often as he can, and he catches himself telling you more about his everyday life as a cowboy while watching you closely for your reactions. He tells you what he loves about his life on the ranch, tells you that it is a lot of hard work and that it can be tough at times, but that it is also peaceful, and that he likes that he is free out there.
"I like that I am my own boss because I really don't do well with people trying to tell me what to do."
And you laugh and roll your eyes, and Sukuna grins at you with a wink and adds,
"Well, you are the exception, baby."
And as teasing and light-hearted as it sounds, Sukuna knows that he is telling the truth. He doesn't mind if you tell him what to do. He doesn't mind if he has to take responsibility for his actions. Not when it comes to you.
You beam at him and kiss his tattooed cheek and ask in that sweet voice,
"Will you finally show me your ranch, Sukuna?"
And he knows what you are really asking is for Sukuna to finally let you in. To let this last wall tumble to the ground and allow you into his life in every way.
Sukuna feels strangely nervous when driving you to his ranch. But not because he is scared of losing his last refuge. He is nervous because he is worried you won't like the life out here in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but endless miles of uninhabited land around you and only Sukuna and his animals to keep you company.
Sukuna hopes you will like it. Because there is this small voice in his mind that whispers to him, "I want her to stay."
Sukuna watches you carefully while he shows you around his small ranch, showing you the old farmhouse he renovated, the barn he built with his own hands, and the stables he gave a new paint and a modern interior.
Relief floods Sukuna's chest when he sees the genuine smile on your pretty face and the joy when you pet his favorite horse. You turn to him, telling him that you love his ranch and praising him for turning an old abandoned farm into this pretty place.
"You are so passionate about the things you want, Sukuna, and you work hard for them. That's an admirable trait. This place is beautiful."
Sukuna smirks proudly at you, feeling this warmth in his chest again. He wraps a strong, tattooed arm around your waist and pulls you against him. And he knows exactly what he wants.
"This place is even more beautiful with you here. You remember what I said about enjoying my freedom out here? I feel free with you by my side, too. It doesn't feel like I am giving anything up when I am with you. It feels like I am gaining something."
There are happy tears shining in your eyes when you look up at him, and you smile and put a small hand on Sukuna's defined chest, right where his heart is beating strong and fast,
"I would love to live here with you, cowboy. I could help you with the crops and make sure you always have something warm to eat when you come home in the evening. I could even help with the horses and the cows, I think. And I can keep you company out here and keep you warm at night."
Sukuna doesn't believe in a God, but he thinks some kind of higher power or fate or whatever must have finally blessed him. Must have finally allowed a fallen angel like him some sort of heaven, too.
Sukuna smiles at you, a gentle, genuine smile that he never gives to anyone else, and he takes his cowboy hat off and puts it carefully onto your head,
"Then welcome to your new home, cowgirl."
SIGHHHHH, this cowboy makes me swoon đđđđ I didn't expect this story to become so long, but I just couldn't stop writing. It was one of those moments where Sukuna took things into his hands and made me tell the whole story, and of course I do what my man wants ;)
I hope you enjoyed falling in love with Cowboy!Sukuna, too đ
Thank you so much for reading! Comments and reblogs would be very sweet.
There will be a Part 2 in which we see our life on Sukuna's ranch.
And once again: Thank you Ămilie @sweetlandspos for drawing your beautiful and sexy Cowboy!Sukuna, who inspired me to write this AU!! I hope you find joy in this story!!
FT: Simon x gn!reader
Warnings: DV, abuse, please let me know if anything else should be here!đ
SUM: When your terrified voice reaches Simon in the dead of night, it shatters the fragile calm heâs barely been holding onto. The chilling sounds of Tomâs violence echo through the phone before the line goes dead, plunging Simon into a storm of panic and rage.
At the hospital, the sight of your battered body tests the limits of Simonâs resolve. Wracked with guilt and helplessness, he sits vigil by your side, promising to be your anchor through the long journey ahead. With every breath you take, Simon clings to hope, vowing that no shadow, no monster, will ever dim your light again.
A/N: Here's your daily does of emotional whirlwind âwriting Simonâs frantic desperation was both exhilarating and painful. The tension, urgency, and heartbreak culminate in the ICU, where hope begins to bloom amid the wreckage. Simonâs love and determination shine as a reminder that even in the darkest of nights, thereâs always a glimmer of light. đđ
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7
A few more days bleed into restless nights, the heavy silence of the Manchester sky pressing down on Simon like a weight he couldnât shake. Time moves like molasses, each second dragging him deeper into the dread of not knowing how you were, or if you were even still safe. But that night, everything changes in an instant. His troubled sleep is torn apart by the shrill ring of the phone, cutting through the air like a blade. His eyes snap open, and before he can even comprehend the sound, his hand is already reaching for the receiver.Â
The voice on the other end, fragile and trembling with fear, nearly paralyzes him. "Simon?"Â
It's you. And in that one word, in the sheer terror that laces it, Simonâs world tilts, and all the anger and hurt heâs kept buried for so long rises to the surface, hot and violent.Â
"What's wrong, love?" His voice is rough, half-awake, but the panic is unmistakable. He struggles to ground himself, to make sense of what heâs hearing. "What happened? What did he do?"
Your voice breaks as you speak, barely above a whisper, but itâs enough to rattle him to his core. "Heâs going to kill me this time, I know it."
Simonâs blood runs cold. Every nerve in his body goes taut, and his heart pounds in his chest as the words hang in the air between you both. The rawness of your fear is something heâs never encountered before, and it pierces through him like a dagger. He can hear the crashing of objects in the background, the sounds of a struggle. Then, Tomâs voiceâmocking, casual, as if your life is some game to him.Â
âSorry, but theyâre a little busy at the moment,â Tom sneers, his words dripping with malice.Â
Then, the line goes dead.
The silence that follows is deafening, a hollow emptiness that fills Simonâs chest with a freezing panic. His throat tightens, his stomach churns. In that moment, itâs as if time itself stands still, and Simonâs worst fear becomes a brutal reality. Youâre in the hands of a monster. His mind races, each thought sharp, desperate, as the fear of losing you claws its way through him.
His fingers tremble as they dial the police, his voice a mixture of urgency and barely-contained rage as he relays the details. He pleads with them to hurry, to get to your houseânow. But the suffocating weight of the night drags everything down, the darkness amplifying the terror of the unknown. Thereâs nothing he can do until they arrive, but he canât sit idle. Not when your life is on the line. Not when every instinct in his body screams that he needs to act.
Without hesitation, he slams the phone down and rushes toward the truck. The engine roars to life beneath him, the sound a furious symphony against the quiet of the night. He slams his foot down on the pedal, sending the truck screeching forward. His hands grip the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turn white, but he doesnât feel the pain. All he can think of is getting to you, getting to you now.
The road ahead is a blur, the lights from streetlamps slicing through the night like stabs of light in a sea of dark. His mind races with memories of youâyour laughter, the way your eyes lit up when you smiled, the warmth of your hand in his. Every moment heâs spent with you flashes before his eyes like a reel of precious memories, and for a split second, he lets that tiny flicker of hope ignite inside him. Maybe, just maybe, he can make it in time.Â
But as the miles stretch on, that hope feels like itâs slipping through his fingers. The darkened streets pass in a haze, each second a heartbeat that echoes louder and louder in his ears. His foot presses harder on the gas pedal, his breath coming in shallow bursts. Heâs already pushing the truck to its limits, but it doesnât feel fast enough. Thereâs no time for caution now. Only the desperate need to reach you.
When Simon finally arrives at your house, the scene is chaotic. Police cars line the street, their flashing lights a disorienting mix of red and blue that slices through the night. Officers swarm around, their voices rising and falling in a cacophony of urgent conversations, punctuated by the crackling radio transmissions and the sharp clack of boots on asphalt. The air smells of tension and fear. Simonâs stomach twists, each step he takes toward the house heavier than the last, his body moving on autopilot as his mind tries to process what could have just happened. He pushes through the crowd of officers, each one a physical barrier, until a voice rises above the rest.
âWith those injuries, itâs a miracle they still had any blood left in their body.â
Simonâs breath hitches in his throat. A cold, brutal wave of dread crashes over him, freezing him in place. The words echo in his mind, each one a jagged shard that digs deeper and deeper into his chest. He canât think, canât breatheâhis body is moving on instinct now, his legs carrying him faster as he fights through the crowd, his pulse roaring in his ears.
âWhere are they? What happened?â he demands, his voice hoarse and desperate, barely recognizing the rawness in it.
The officer he approaches looks at him, and for the first time, Simon sees the weight of the world in someone else's eyes. The fatigue is etched into the lines of the officerâs faceâsomeone whoâs seen too much, someone whoâs witnessed the worst of what humanity can do. He opens his mouth to answer, but his words land with the kind of heaviness Simon wasnât prepared for.
âLooks like it was a bad scene. The victimâs been taken to the local hospital. Theyâll do everything they can.â
The officerâs words are a blur, but Simon barely hears them. His mind is already miles ahead, racing toward the one place where he might find youâthe hospital. Without another word, Simon turns, his breath ragged, his heart beating in overdrive as he sprints back to his truck. Every muscle in his body is screaming at him to move faster, but the agonizing truth sits like a weight on his chest: heâs already too late to prevent whatever horrors have already been inflicted.
The engine of the truck roars to life beneath him, and Simon doesnât hesitate, his foot pressing firmly against the gas pedal. The truck surges forward, the tires squealing against the pavement as he drives faster than he ever has, weaving through the streets with the sole thought of getting to you.
When he pulls up to the hospital, the sterile smell of antiseptic and bleach hits him like a slap. Fluorescent lights buzz overhead, too bright, too harsh against the darkness of the night that still clings to him. His hands shake as he pushes the door open, the noise too loud, too intrusive. He feels disconnected from everything, as though heâs walking through a dreamâa nightmare he canât escape. Heâs gripped by the overwhelming pull of anxiety, guilt, and helplessness, and his heart is a wild, uncontrollable drumbeat in his chest.
A nurse sees him and gestures for him to follow. Her professionalism is almost a cruel contrast to the mess of emotions churning inside him, but he clings to it, letting it guide him through the sterile corridors. She leads him to the ICU, where the air is thick with sorrow. And then, there you are.
You lie in the bed, a quiet warrior in a battlefield of bandages. Simonâs stomach twists violently, and for a moment, he canât breathe. His knees feel weak as he steps closer, the sight of you a punch to the gut. Your skin is marred with bruises and cuts, black and blue hues staining you like a map of countless battles fought in silence. He sees the way your body is wrapped in white gauze, each bandage a whisper of the suffering youâve endured, each stitch a testament to the hell youâve lived through. The enormity of it presses down on him, each breath he takes a struggle as if the air itself has been robbed of its warmth.
"Will⌠will they be okay?" he finally manages, his voice barely a whisper, trembling with the raw emotion heâs been holding back.
The nurseâs face softens, but her answer is cautious, laced with the knowledge of what recovery truly means. "Theyâre stable for now, but itâs going to be a long road. Itâs going to take time."
Simon nods, his heart cracking a little more, the weight of her words settling deep inside him. Time. He wants to scream, to demand that it hurry, but he doesnât. He just watches, helpless, as you lie thereâyour life hanging in the balance, the toll of your suffering written across your face.
He pulls a chair up to your bedside, his hands trembling as he reaches out to grasp yours. His fingers wrap around yours gently, but it feels like youâre a thousand miles away. Your hand is cold, too cold, lifeless in his. His throat tightens as tears threaten to spill, but he holds them back. He promised you he would protect you, and here he isâunable to protect you from the man whoâs broken you.
âStay with me, love,â Simon murmurs, his voice cracking with emotion, a raw promise slipping from his lips. âI promise Iâll take care of you. Every day after this, every moment.â
He watches the faint rise and fall of your chest, the steady rhythm of your breathing a bittersweet comfort. The night drifts on, time stretching endlessly as he sits by your side, his mind a whirlwind of thoughtsâthoughts of you, thoughts of Tom, thoughts of the life you should have had. He remembers the cruelty he faced at the hands of his own father, how those scars shaped him into the man he is todayâa protector. And now, watching you fight for your life, he realizes that he is fighting, too. Fighting for you in every way he can.
He thinks of his mother, who used to say, when the nights turned cold and the shadows loomed too large, "Loveâs light will always pierce the darkest nights."
And Simon clings to that light. He knows itâs what will guide him through the darkest moments ahead, and it starts right hereâstaying, waiting, and hoping.
Until the moment you wake, heâll be here. Fighting for you, for your healing, for the chance to give you everything you deserve.
@jessicab1991
@hotaruteba
@daydreamerwoah
@angelic-thingys
@alessias-art
@lilynotdilly
Here's the current post schedule with some upcoming stories to look forward to!
part thirty-five âother parts
pairing:Â Simon âGhostâ Riley x fem!reader words:Â 5.8k tags:Â death. blood and gore. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. enemies to lovers. menstruation. harm to a child. summary:Â After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.
Jagged rock burns into your palms. Slapping a hand up, you feel for the grassy ledge, barely visible in the darkness. You heft the backpack over it before managing to pull yourself up, landing on your stomach with a grunt through your teeth. The sneakers you scavenged from the closet are tight around your toesâbetter than Salome's thin shoes, but still far from pleasing as you stand and press on towards the road.
Moonlight guides you north.Â
Not long until sunrise, judging by the sky.
Small white clouds puff around your mouth as the chilled air brushes the damp spot on your too-big jeans, the cuffs rolled and the waist cinched to keep them from slipping. You couldn't leave in the middle of the night, so you held a mug of water as a makeshift alarm. The moment sleep tried to steal you, the splash on your thigh ended it abruptly.Â
You'd woken Blue up to tell her. At first, grey eyes scolded you in the dark. She looked away, ready to argue, before quietly reciting instead: the house they kept her in, the layout, any hiding places she may have seen.
"What about her?" you had asked. "Anything important to her. She probably saw antibiotics as a gift from God or something."
"Yeah. She would've," Blue muttered. "She liked to knit. And, um, talked about birds. Her husband owned the whole place, but he died. I don't know if any of that helps."
"It does. It's better than nothing." You gave her hand a squeeze. "Make sure he eats again. And check his back. You might need to drain it. You know how now, right? Nereida couldâ"
"I've got it." She slipped her hand away. "Justâdon't do anything stupid, okay?"
"Of course not."
Sneaking out had been easyâonly because Nereida was on watch. You slipped out the back and wove through the tall grass, barely stirring the stalks. Price would've caught you for sure. But you made it across the creek with nothing more than the slow unrolling of your jeans to slow you down, the cuffs dragging in the water and soaking through. You rolled them back up, but a kilometer up the road, they've slouched back down, heavy and clinging to your legs.
Time is an enemy you've already lost a day to. With a sigh, you drop onto the hood of a rusted car, pull the knife from your waist, and hack at the fabricâs ends. A serrated blade would make this easier. The hems are jagged, but at least they wonât get in the way.
Ghostâs fever is bad, but the real threat is sepsisâthe blood poisoning, organ failure, the things you havenât told Blue. At best, he has a week. At worst, another day. The thought has you scrubbing a hand over your tired eyes before pushing off the car. You toss the cut scraps into the grass just as a disturbance prickles the back of your neck.
You whirl around, dropping the knife in favor of the pistol.Â
"Just me."
"Jesus. Kyle. I was ready to shoot."
"Honorable of you to give me a quick one."
You huff, bend for the knife, and slip it back at your waist.
He closes the gap, rifle and backpack slung over his shoulders.Â
"Why wouldn't you tell anyone?" His brows lower. "I went to feed him, and Blue said youâd gone back. Hell of a surprise."
You give him your back. "I've already wasted time. I knew what you'd say."
"And what exactly did you think I'd say?" A hand on your shoulders pries you back around.
Your eyes drift up to his, narrow, then veer to the side. "That it's a long shot."
"Yeah, it is." His hand drops. He brushes past you with a sigh, long and ragged, adjusting the rifle on his back. "Come on, then. You're not the only one who gives a shit about him."
There isn't anything to be said as you trudge beside him, no argument able to form. You know his company is invaluable. Gratitude is still hard to find, even when he prevents you from going the wrong way. "We turned here last time." Apparently you hadn't paid much mind. The road fills the gaps of silence, dawn breathing life into the buzz of cicadas. Long drags of air fill your lungs: sweet flowers only, until, something else. A waft of charred meat.
"You should eat."
Kyle extends a piece of squirrel. Despite the twinge in your stomach, you brush him off. "While they were starving you, we were getting stuffed. Fatten the mares, get a strong foalâall that."
His jaw ticks. "Ah."
"Damn good food, too."
"Lucky you."
"Lucky us."
Conversation shrinks to a brief exchange of what Blue said. He doesn't look convinced it'll help much. The stench doesnât sour the air until the first sign for Fleurbaix rises at your rightâlike a breath in your face. Humidity clings to it, thick and unmoving, until thereâs nothing else to breathe. In the sunlight, familiar stone walls and red-shingled rooftops repulse you, almost more than the sight of aimless Greysâsome weaving between clotheslines, most trapped within the fenced pasture. The cows, however, have already fled through a broken gap, eager to escape uphill.
"They should've lost interest by now. The blood isn't fresh," you mutter.
"Humidity. Less evaporation, more smell." He nods the tip of his rifle. "Over there. That one has a wraparound porch like Blue said."
The view vanishes behind overgrown trees as you crest a hill, descending toward the commune. Kyle motions you forward, weaving through structures, keeping clear of the Greys. As long as they canât scent you, they will stay distracted. You step over a few stray bodies, faces picked apart by crows that scatter at your approach. Clinging to a stone wall as you follow, a bony hand bursts forth from a windowâKyle knifes its skull before it can grab you.
Other than that, there aren't any close calls.
You reach the house that fits Blue's description.
The door is wide open.
Kyle sweeps in with the poised rifle.
You are greeted by an already ransacked interior. Tipped chairs, half-yanked cabinets, tossed couch cushions. A sick understanding settles at your fingertips, curling them around the gun.Â
"They were here. The women. They knew she would've hidden them."
More signs that this is just a dead end; a waste of precious time. Â
Kyle lowers the guns and presses forward into the hall. "That doesn't mean they found what they were looking for. Check the rooms."
Maman's house is as expected, even in disarray. Quiet and balmy. You kick open the first door. Polished wood, gold-embellished hinges, a closet stuffed with white gowns. A knitting bag catches your eye. You sift through it, tossing out balls of red yarn. Nothing.
More nothing under the bed.Â
You tear the painting from the wall, only solid stone behind it.
A family photo thrashes to the floor beneath a swipe of your fist. You find Kyle in the other room, where a smaller bed is tucked beneath a windowâthe sight makes it hard to breathe for a moment. The blood stain on the sheets. Somehow you know whose it is. Your stomach rips at itself. You force yourself to look away before you lose it.Â
"The floorboards. They didn't look under them. Help me."
He raps the butt of the rifle against the wood. A hollow echo near the doorway offers promise. A knife jammed between the planks pries them apart. When you sink to your knees, all that fills your hands are stashes of faded euros. No pills, no vials.Â
You rip up the notes and let the shreds feather through the air, leaning back on your palms as a quiet hiss leaves your teeth. "Where did you put them you vile, ugly, goddamn hag."
"Maybe her son kept them," Kyle murmurs, threading a hand through his hair. "He had the guns."
"No." Your voice is firm. You stand and pace. "She would've wanted them close to her. Antibioticsâshe was saving that for the women. The births."
You reach for your knife and stab the mattress, slicing it open. Springs and foam. Books maybe. You run back to the shelf in the hall and rip them one at a time, flipping them open to see if any were hollowed out. Even the Bible is just a book.Â
What else?
What else?
"How much time are we willing to spend looking for them, Twix?" he asks lowly behind you. "Maybe we check somewhere else. A town."
"They'd have picked them clean years ago." You toss the Bible to the floor with a thud. "This was our best bet. We had them. We fucking had them."
"And now we donât. We canât keep tearing this place apart. We focus on keeping him stableâkeep the wounds clean, use what weâve got. Heâs made it this far without them. We just need to buy him more time. There might be another stash in one of the other houses."
You lean against the wall, eyes fluttering shut briefly. A deep inhale. "There's justâsomething I'm missing."
"Twixâ" He sighs, running a hand down his face. "Alright. Let's do another sweep. I'll check the floors in the living room."
Thoughts race. A frothy tide refusing to settle. You press your thumb to the scabbed cut on your wrist, the sting sharpening your mind. Back in the cell. Morning sun slanting through the window. Obsessively studying whatâs around you. Replaying everything you learned about that woman. A dead woman. If you couldâve told the Greys to hold off, let her speak before they tore through her neck, you would have.
In the midst, a doveâs call breaks throughâthree notes, too close in your ear. You must be imagining it, but Alexandreâs voice stirs in your head:Â La tourterelle chante pour toi.
He said that when he heard the dove.
Why?
Birds.
She talked about birds.
You push off the wall and follow the sound to the room where they kept Blue. The coo draws you to the windowsill by the bed, where the glass is cracked just enough for the curtains to stir, the stench outside seeping in. Twin beady eyes snap to yours, a mechanical tilt of its neck. A collared dove, you think. Paul used to rise early to listen to them.
"Where are they?" you press lowly, accusing. "You know, don't you?"
The bird doesnât answer, only flutters down from the sill.
Your fingers grip the edge of the window as you kneel on the ruined mattress. Below, the bird perches in the flower boxâno flowers, just dried weeds and a nest of twigs.
"Tell me." It watches the whisper curl from your lips. "Tell me, or Iâll rip apart your home."
It flutters off. Your arm lunges after it, clawing at the nest in blind retaliation. Twigs snap. Dirt kicks up into your eyes. You blink hard to clear it. A strangled sound catches in your throatâhalf a curse, half a cry. Then, something strange beneath. Sharp rust that makes you freeze.
You sweep debris off the top of aâa lock boxâloosely buried within the soil. A breath lodges in your throat as you claw at the dirt, dragging the rusted metal loose, launching backward on the bed with it clutched in both hands. It can't be real. You give the box a sharp shake. Something rattles inside, and your chest tightens.
"Kyle!"
Thunderous slaps of his boots echo down the hall. He rushes in, scanning you with a sweep of his gaze.
"No, I'mâthis is locked." You tug at the bolted metal. "Can you open it?"Â
He doesn't question it. Relief flickers across his face, quickly replaced by grim determination. He raises the rifle and slams the butt against the lock. A sharp clang echoes, metal chipping but holding. Exhaling through his nose, he adjusts his grip. You meet his eyes and nodâkeep going.
He hammers at the lock, pausing only to yank at it, testing for weakness. You wipe dirt from your jeans, watching. Whatever she buried hereâit mattered. It had to. A dove lands on the windowsill, but movement beyond it sends your pulse spiking above the sharp cut of metal.
Greys.
When did theyâ
"Shit, shit, shit." You lurch from the bed.Â
He stops, yanking up the rifle to jut it toward the window, shooting a snarling one that clambers up on the porch. It flails back, revealing more alike behind itâmany moreâshambling out from wherever they'd been lingering. "Fuckâhow!" He tucks the lock box under his armpit and grabs your wrist. "Come on."
The living room windows reveal just how many have begun to close in around the house. Faster ones are already at the front door, clawing at the wood. Kyle swears, yanking you toward the bathroomâhigher ground, a window above the porcelain tub. He slams it open with the rifle, then hands instantly find your waist to lift you. You shed the backpack, pulling it through behind your feet to squeeze through blindly.
"Anything to climb?" he barks.
You look up. "A gutter!"
You grab it and tighten your core, hoisting yourself up as your sneakers scrape against the siding, the moans below growing louder as they round the corner of the porch. Your palms press into exposed rafters, the gutter serving as a shaky foothold, but the last push onto the roof eludes you.
A firm shove at your thighs sends you over. You scramble up, steadying yourself before glancing back.
Kyle is halfway up, rappelling fastâuntil a bony hand clamps around his ankle, yanking him downward. Disoriented from the rush, you slap for the gun at your waist, firing wildlyâtwo bullets wasted before one lands, shattering the Grey's skull with a squeal.
He throws the lockbox. You catch it just as he hauls himself onto the shingles.
Your head reels as you watch Kyle drop to one knee and start picking them off. Four, maybe five drop with ease, but the rest move erraticallyâjolting, frantic. He slows, trying to track their unpredictable movements, each shot requiring more precision. If you had your bow, you could help. But the pistol? You don't trust yourself.
He grunts in frustration, adjusts his stance, then reloads as he circles the perimeter of the roof. Thatâs when you feel itânot a hunger pang, but a deep, familiar ache, piercing low in your gut. Then something wet. Warm. A slow gush down your leg. Your breath stutters as you glance down at the stain blooming red across your thigh.
"It's me," you say.
"What?"
"Fuck, it's me they smell. My period."
His gaze drops to your body, widening when he sees the evidence. You should feel exposed, but you donât. The thought slams into your brain at the same time your hands moveâunbuttoning, yanking at the fly. The moans below swell.
"We can use it. Look away."
His eyes snap back to yours, then dart away with a sharp exhale. "Christ."
Youâre already shoving them down, tugging at the loose, borrowed underwear clinging to your hips. Gathering the fabric, you swipe at the blood slick on your thigh, pressing it deeper into the fabric. "It can buy us timeâbut not much."
You yank the jeans back up. You roll the underwear into a ball. Kyle looks over.
"Thereâthrow it toward that house. The doorâs open. If enough go inside, it might trap some. Then we run back to the hill."
Just as quickly as the plan is formed, you hurl back your arm and launch the decoy as hard as you can. It lands in front of the next house, far enough to release the breath caged in your lungs as heads snap toward it, bodies lurching away. Kyle slings the rifle over his shoulder, grips your waist, and helps you downâbut the moment he lets go to steady himself, your foot slips on the gutter.
You land roughly on your side and lose hold of the lockbox. All of the breath leaves your body as you scramble to grab it. A strong hand beneath your armpit tugs you back up, and then you're sprinting. A quick glance back shows most are drawn away, but a few still trail you. Kyle snatches the handgun from your waist mid-stride and fires, dropping two before they get too close.
You duck beneath clotheslines, weave through wash bins still brimming with water. Trample roses. The pulse pounding in your neck drowns out everything but the next shot Kyle firesâenough to throw off your step. You donât see the one lunging until it slams into you from the side.
You feel the jolt of the fall before you fully register the thing wrestling on top of you. Hair whips into your mouth, rancid breath spilling hot across your cheek. The strength is wrongâtoo fresh, too human. The hands grabbing at you are still strangely soft. A distinct bulge presses you down. Then a glob of dark-tinged saliva splats onto your eye, blinding you before you can make sense of it.
It's only a second of fight before a shot to the skull sends pulpy blood and brain onto your face.Â
The weight is torn away as you scrub at your eyes. Part of you already knows before you look at the limp corpse. Time congeals. Blonde hair fans over the grass, framing a pale face with white eyes. The slip dressâthe same one you pulled over her head.
Her swollen belly.
You go rigid. Kyle has to yank hard to get you upright.
"Come on!"
"They left her."
The words spill numbly from your lips.
When he shoots another Grey, your wooden, puppet legs move. You leave the body of her behind, adrenaline numbing you. After what is realistically only minutes but feels like hours, the thick trees envelop you once again, and when you finally steal a glance, you can't see them anymore. They've lost your scent for now. Enough for you to pause against a tree, swallowing air to catch your breath.Â
You walk deeper into the vegetation until Kyle feels satisfied enough to stop and retrieve a canister of water from his backpack. He offers it to you. It takes a moment to steady it at your lips, then your throat allows some down. But your stomach spasms almost instantly, and you are wrenching it back up at the base of a tree, crumpling to your knees.
"Shit."
Hands collect your hair.
A few more dry heaves consume you, until you're breathing harshly through a hanging mouth.
"No⌠They didnâtâ" A hard swallow. "They let her out. She was in the cell."
"What?" His voice brushes your neck, touch halting at your shoulders. Realization softens his tone. "You knew herâthe pregnant one."
You wipe your mouth and stand. His hands stay at your arms a beat too long, grip firm, like heâs waiting for somethingâan explanation you donât give. You donât meet his eyes. "We need to move."
Your stomach still aches, but you don't vomit again. You walk quickly out of the trees and to the road.Â
The walk back is spent scanning more closely to see if you've drawn more with your smell. By the time you reach the cliff, midday swelters. Lightheadedness teeters your first attempt down. Kyle tosses the box and rifle to the bottom, then carries you on his back, your fingers interlocking to keep you secure like the backpack that hugs his chest.Â
A stop at the creek allows a shaky handful of water to splash your face. Taking off your jeans to wash your blood-stained thighs feels too much of a task. Instead, you watch Kyle finally finish striking the lock, the metal giving way under his relentless grunts.Â
"Do you want me to open it?" He glances at you.
A slow shake of your head. Your knees sink before it. Fingers hesitate at the latch. If this isnât itâif itâs emptyâyou donât know what comes next. What fills the space where the smallest sliver of hope has wedged itself in.
The scrape of rusted metal.
At first, all you see is cloth. A yellowed shade of white. A beat of nothing. Then, your hands move on their own accord, unwrapping the contents, brushing hard plastic. The faint rattle of capsules makes you inhale before you even read the first label: amoxicillin. You go still. Dig through for more. Four, five vials. Even more than what you had on you.
The run back to the house is a battle against your own legs.
The smell of blood hits firstâthick, metallic. Not human. A quick glance confirms it, Price carving up a hefty cattle he must've found.
He's saying something, to Kyle maybe. You donât pause.
The front door swings open.
Blueâ
She slams into you, arms locking tight, breath knocked from your lungs.
"I saw you from the window."
"You shouldnât be on your feet," you manage.
She looks down. At your hand. At the pills.
Her voice trembles. "You⌠you found it?"
You nod.
Up the stairs. Blue tugging at your sleeve. Kyle's steps audible behind you. The bedroom waits. Stale air. Ghostâhe's lying on his stomach the way you left him, but a smother of something sticky glistens on his back.Â
"Honey," Blue mumbles, wincing as she lowers on the bed. "Ari... he found a hive. I was just about to put clean bandages, too. It helps, right?"
"Not as much as this should help."
Kyle begins lifting him.
"He was up for a bit, but he was... talking weird," Blue whispers as you kneel at Ghost's side, fight the shake in your hand to unscrew the cap. "He asked if you were sleeping outsideâlike, out loud, to himself. Then he kept saying âsparksâ and âWashington.â Do you know what that means?"
The words barely register anything but confusion and the fact that he is even worse. It's Kyle who answers under his breath. "No clue." His gets Ghost upright without disturbing his wounds, steadying a hand at the back of his skull.Â
When your thumb presses at his bottom lip, the dry, cracked skin resists. As you try to pry it apart, his eyes flicker openâunfocused. Dilated pupils shift to yours.
"I need you to open," you whisper around the tightness in your throat. "It's amoxicillin. We've got it."
Overgrown hair clings to his forehead, thick and unruly. Sharp stubble scrapes your hand as you try again to open his mouth. Labored breaths hit your knuckles, unnervingly hot, along with a release of words he murmurs through his teeth. "There you are... again.Â
Your teeth graze your cheek. "Here I am. Now open, please."
He doesâbarely. The chalky pill makes it to his tongue. The rest blurs.
Waking up on edge is nothing new.
At first, you keep your eyes shutâsqueezing them until the backs turn red. Then, true consciousness jolts through your limbs, setting a heavy heartbeat between your ears. Light floods your vision. Soft cheeks. Pink lips, pursed. Brows knitted tight.
"You make the strangest faces in your sleep sometimes."
"I..."
"Water?"
"Please," you croak.
Pins and needles prickle your fingers as you lift your head. A mug presses to your blistered lips, gentle fingers stroking the greasy hair at your temple. The gulp of water almost makes you moan. You're ready to down the entire things until it's pulled away.
"You're gonna throw up again if you keep going."
You lick your lips. "What?"
"You've been passed out for two days," Blue explains. "Except for when we tried to get you to eat and drink, but that was a fucking struggle. Nereida says you overworked yourself. Not enough sleep and water can kill you, you know." Her brow arches. "I told you not to do anything stupid, but I guess you've been doing that."
Two days.
You inhale through lungs that feel primitive.Â
"Heâ"
"Before you ask, yes. We've been giving him the meds. Morning and evening. His fever finally went down last night. He's been out since."
Your eyes finally drift to the other side of the bed. A steady rise and fall presses warmth into the sheets. You scramble up, reaching overâhis cheek meets your palm, warm, but not alarmingly so. Normal, almost. A faint flush dusts his skin, the color creeping back in. His back is freshly bandaged, but his eyelids still bear the violet tinge of exhaustion.
"It's helping." The words press into your teeth.Â
The rest of the day passes in gentle fragments.Â
A bowl of fire-braised beef pressed into your hands. You eat without tasting, slow chewing through lush fat, while Price and Kyle pore over a more detailed almanac they found in the house. The food settles heavy, to the point of discomfort, but stays down.Â
Later, you wade into the creek with Nereida. She was the one who changed you while you were outâscrubbing the dirt from your legs, tucking fresh towels and a new pair of underwear beneath you. You only realize she added rosemary when a sprig falls out as you undress.
You listen to her talk. You donât tell her about Salome. No. You keep it to yourself. The water is warm. At first, you donât feel it. But as it swallows your shins and carries away ribbons of dried blood, the gentle current soothes, taking the edge off the sun, which turns the rocks along the bank scorching hot. Birds call from the treesâyou donât know what kind. Worm-like minnows tickle your sore toes.
Back at the house, you sit on the porch to wring out your hair. You catch Ari carrying Blue through the garden, her head tucked against his shoulder, bandaged feet dangling over the arm that hooks under her knees. They whisper about something. His steps are slow, pausing by a beautiful patch of flowers that, apparently, smell rancid by the way she leans in and recoils, making a face. When you look away, Kyle is staring at you across the grass as he hangs strips of beef over a tree branch to dry.Â
You should thank him. For not letting you do the stupid thing alone. But instead, you shift your gaze to the sun and watch its slow descent on your own, studying the way it casts an orange glow across the wild growth. It's the sudden assault of dark clouds that send everyone inside. A summer rain that bursts down without warning, without mercy.Â
It hasn't relented by the time you fix a bowl of meat for Ghost. He has yet to ingest anything but bone broth and some plum juice according to Blue and Nereida. You chew off little pieces of the least fattiest parts into a bowl and give it to Blue. You go with her to feed him but stop short, keeping your distance. You simply watch from across the room as he manages to sit up on his own despite swaying, brushing away Price's helping arm, and chewing slowly with great effort. His eyes, focused and clear, flit upward to yours. You hold them for a moment, until the pull in your chest turns intolerable, and you look down at his bandaged shoulder instead.Â
"Tastes good?" Blue murmurs, brushing the hair from his forehead.
He hums.Â
"How do you feel?"
He swallows, then lifts a hand to her hair, thumbing at it. "Young again."
She places her hand over his, biting a smile. "You're so annoying."
She wipes at her eyes.Â
Instead of easing, the rain intensifies as the night deepens. Distant thunder rolls closer, flashing into overhead lightning that only sharpens your edge. Blue spends the night with Ari in the living room, where Kyle helped them set up a small fort of blankets and pillowsâa small distraction, but one she could use. It takes a nudge from you to push past her hesitation, to convince her itâs okay to leave Ghostâs side, just for a little while.
"It's good to have some space, if you need it."
That leaves you alone in the bedroom with him. He knocked out again after eating. You redo his bandages, relieved to find the wounds free of pus. New scabs have begun to form, fragile but promising.
But you can't lay down. You tryâperch at the edge of the bed, press your palms into the mattressâthen you're back on your feet.
The walls feel too close. The air too thick. His steady breathing should ground you, should ease something inside you, but it doesnât. The storm is unyielding, pressing against the house, rattling the windows. It drives your nails into your palms, into the raw skin around them. A string ties itself around your ankles, pulling one foot in front of the other until you're in the hallway, hand blindly skimming the wall to guide you to the spiral staircase.
Upward.
The library. You donât even realize youâve come here until you freeze at the top of the stairs, staring at the wreckage left behind by your hands. Books lie scattered across the floor, pages severed and crumpled. A curtain rod rests askew, displaced in the quiet ruin.
When you finally move, itâs a mindless ordeal. The motions of putting the room back togetherâguided only by the stray flash of lightningâsteal any thoughts before they can form. You kneel, gently stacking books against your chest, slotting them one by one back onto the oak shelves. Embellished spines offer familiar titles, even in French. A lot of Jane Austen.
"No Hemingway, huh?" you whisper, swiping a finger through the blanket of dust before bending for more books. You reach the last shelf, lips twitching. "I'm fixing you. Happy now?"
Of course, no answer. Only the faint slide of leather against the wood.Â
Heâs in the room before you notice.
The presence registers as a skim along the back of your neck.
But you donât turn, hand freezing after you release Le Comte de Monte-Cristo, then dropping limp at your side. You know itâs him. You feel it in the shift of the air, the weight of it settling differently around you. More so in the slow, deliberate footfalls, each one measured, as if testing the ground. And if none of that gives him away, the warmth of his breathâheavy, unevenâspilling over your scalp does. It sinks into your skin when he reaches you, winds through your veins, curls your toes against the floor until they hurt.
You try to inhale, but the breath snags, fracturing in your throat. "You shouldnât be up."
"I shouldn't."
His hand lifts, knuckles skimming the flannel draped over your frame before grazing your neck with a slow, unhurried sweep of his thumb. It trails down your arm, pausing at the last book in your grasp. He takes it from youâor maybe it slips from your weak grip. You can't tell.
With a deep breath, he reaches the shelf above you. The book doesn't fit at first, his hand unsteady, struggling to align it. A final rough shove of his knuckles forces it into place. Heâs close. You knew he was, but now his scent wraps around youâmossy, salty, earth that you fall face-first into. His chest skims your spine. An elbow grazes your ear as he finishes.
And then he turns you.
His fingers curl around your shoulder, guiding you until you're facing him. Your feet slide to follow, reluctant and all too willing. Storm-filtered light catches on the sharp cut of his jaw, casting it in shadow. You brace yourself. An unformed breath fills your chest. You're unable to meet his eyesâthough you feel them, tracing every inch of your face.
Wordless, he takes hold of your wrist. You donât understand why until he cradles it in his rough palm, between your chests. His chapped lips lower to the tail-end of the healing cut, light enough not to stir pain.
His lips move.
But you don't.
It's as if every function of your brain is funneled into the nerves beneath each kiss he trails up your forearm. Soft, unwavering, yet each one lingering for a beat longer than the last. The next one lands at the crease in your elbow. A breath finally rushes out of your nose when he reaches the top of your shoulder, close enough to the pounding artery in your neck to invite heat over your cheeks. A strange heat. The same temperature of the moisture that begins to cloud your vision.Â
You tremble. "Ghost, Iâ"Â
You make a last-ditch effort to clutch the hem of his jeans before your knees can waver, his mouth finding your throat. He kisses the part of it that bobs. Then pulls away just enough to cup your face between his hands, forcing your gaze to his. What you are met with is twin, black eyes. They unnerve you. Like the ground beneath your feet, it feels like they might swallow you whole and spit you out.Â
You can't breathe. The shaking is uncontrollable. Rapid blinks dispel the moisture in your eyes before you're gasping, pressing into him. "Please... please. Ghost, Iâ" you choke, "Please, I justâ"
You sound scared, even to your own ears. Like you might get hurt if you he doesn't give you what you're asking for. But you don't know what you're asking forâdon't understand why the soft kisses he places on your forehead and cheeks feel like too much and not enough at the same time. You clasp his wrist to pull his hands off your face, nails piercing into the skin there. He allows itâyou hurting himâeven when almost his entire upper half is swathed in bandages.Â
"You're shaking," he murmurs.
"I'm fine." You exhale, but itâs uneven, shaky in its own right. "I just needâ"
His thumb presses under your chin in attempt to still you.
A swallow forces down the lump in your throat. The ghost of an inhale. Then you lunge, kissing him. Not gentle or hesitant. But with a desperate growl, bursting forth from your mouth into his, your hand threading into his hair and holding tight onto his skull.
part twenty-nine âother parts
pairing:Â Simon âGhostâ Riley x fem!reader words:Â 4.4k tags:Â death. blood. cannibalism mention. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. there will be sex!!! SEX. enemies to lovers. summary:Â After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.
You trip over a tree root, catching yourself against the rough bark. You donât stop. You scream for him again, your legs propelling you toward the road, boots sliding over loose gravel.
He pushes past the others and closes the distance.
You slam into him, nearly falling, and grab his shirt, using him to steady yourself. âSimon, we have to go. Now. We need to leave.â
âWhatâs going on?â Someone asksâPrice?âbut it barely registers.
"We need to fucking leave!" you urge.
Ghost clamps onto your shoulders. âTwix, breathe. What did you see?â
âThere is a bodyâand blood, on the wallâI donât know what it says, but it's freshââ You shake your head, heart erratic. The words wonât come out right. You canât explain the wrongness crawling under your skin, the terrible dread in your stomach. You thrust a finger in the direction of the chapel as if they will understand. The quiet air rolls through the flowers. You feel it now. It's too quiet. Too calm. You can only manage a whisper. âSomeone had to have written the words. Weâre not alone.â
You barely catch the unfurling of his eyes before the world erupts into black smoke, and then you can't see him at all.
They already knew you were here.
He grabs you, shouting something you canât make out.
Your first thought is Blue, and your second is the bow.
Your hands fumble as you blindly slap an arrow onto the string, but someone's body slams into yours, and it falls. You canât even see where it landed.
The cloud of smoke burns your lungs, and a string of coughs spasm up your throat.
Ghostâs grip slips from you.
"Blue!" you choke out.Â
You stumble forward, reaching aimlessly, even though you donât know what youâll do when you find her. Your vision blurs with painful tears, and then you feel itâa sharp prick at your neck.
The pain is a numb, searing sensation down your spine.
Your muscles seize, then convulse.
"Ghost," you think you say. The soft ringing in your ears drowns everything. You try to take a step, but your leg won't move. You succumb to the numbness. The ground rushes to meet you, though darkness steals you first.
You swim between disjointed visions. Viewing them from behind plexiglass. At first, you are talking to Paul. It's a sunny day. The birds are chirping through canopies of oaks. Then, you are in a room bathed in white. Fingers prod at you. You can't react to them. A soft voice hums sweetly, almost soothing, but it twists and warps back into Paulâs voice.
"The world kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry."
You bite a smile. "You know I have those words memorized."
"Good. Don't forget them," he says, not looking up from the wooden bird he whittles between leathery hands. It is a raven, you think. Though, you're no expert like he is.Â
"You missed the first part, though."
His brow lifts. "Remind me."
"The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places," you recite.Â
A weathered mouth stretches at the corners. "Which one will you be, then? Broken or killed?"
You look down at the knife in your hand, the one you've been using to carve the arrow for the bow he's made you. The blade is dulled. You drag a thumb over it, shrugging. "I guess only time will tell."
"I suggest deciding for yourself, Twix."
You look back at him. "What did you call me?"
He responds, but his voice slurs into something unintelligible.Â
White sunlight catches on his knifeâs blade, almost blinding you. You close your eyes against the glare, but the light doesnât fade when you reopen themâit grows, washing out the blue sky until it shifts into a stark white ceiling. Paul is gone. The birds have been silenced. The crisp scent of fresh linen reaches you. Is this a new dream, or the kaleidoscope rolling before the surrender to death? Your body feels like a borrowed shell, your mind straining to instruct your fingertips to move. They manage a weak press into the soft sheets below, rubbing against the fabric as if to convince yourself itâs truly there.
You are alive, then. Or the brain is incredible at tricking you into thinking so.Â
Moving your neck feels like a daunting task, as if the vertebrae in your spine have been rewired, so you shift your eyes, searching for clues, but your memory is faulty at best. The walls are all white and bare. There is a dark wood table at the far corner, and a single shut door to your right. Then, there are...bars. Metal bars stripe the view, and you realize with a sudden jolt in your chest that you are enclosed by them, kept in a confined rectangle at one part of the room.Â
Awareness strikes as you realize you're nearly naked, clad only in a thin, white shift. Someone has changed you. You ignore the lingering ache as you crane your neck upward and steal leverage from your elbows. The small bed below you creaks with the shift in your muscles.Â
There are two other cots in the enclosure, and in them lay two unconscious figures. One lays flat, limbs spread in an unnatural way, while her black hair curtains over the white linen like splats of ink. The other is a smaller girl, her body curled into a haphazard fetal position.
There is no one else in the room.
Only you, Nereida, and Blue.
Audibly dry breaths stagger up your throat. Your mouth feels like painful sandpaper no matter how much spit you try to gather. You try to sit up more, but your legs won't move the way you tell them to, and you end up almost crumpling onto your back again.Â
"F...uck."
They are still asleep, or knocked out, or whatever it is that has been done to you. They are alive, though. This much you know, based on the steady movement in their chests. Still, you want to reach them. You try to lift up once more, managing to lean your back against the wall for support, but just when you are ready to throw your weight into swinging a leg over, a gentle creak comes from the door.
"Tu es rĂŠveillĂŠe!"
Your gaze snaps to a young womanâa strangerâdressed in a long white cloak with a hood and veil. She might look like a ghost if not for the faint shimmer of her features on the other side of the veil: soft cheeks, a slightly crooked nose, but still pretty. She can't be older than you. In her hands is a tray with three mugs of what appears to be a porridge. Nothing about her emits a threat except for the fact she is on the other side of the metal bars. A sharp intake floods your lungs, a scream caught in your throat as she approaches, tilting her head in a look that feigns concern.
"Forgive me, I forget you speak anglaise. Please, do not be afraid. My name is Salome." The accent is thick but ignorable. She glances at the other two with a gentle smile. "I am happy you are awake. Your friends will be awake soon, as well. Are you hurting?"
When you say nothing, frozen, she reaches a mug through the bars and sets it on the floor. "Here. For you. Eat it slowly. Your body is still recovering."
A stretch of silence hangs between you, broken only by your uneven breathing. The understanding sinks in with full force as you glance between her, the other two, and the mug. Itâs an understanding spliced with confusionâmissing pieces. All you know is that your nostrils twitch, and you have no desire to move an inch toward the offering of food.
You observe her in more detail. The cloak hangs loosely on her frame, but she isn't boney, in fact a distinguishable swell shifts under it when she adjusts the tray in her hands. She is pregnant. A pregnant woman is your kidnapper. No, that's not right. She couldn't have carried the three of you, nor could she have done whatever the hell has been done to the four males who are clearly not present. There has to be others. The thought digs your nails into the soft mattress.Â
She looks ready to say something again when her eyes dart to the side. You follow her gaze to see that Blue is moving her leg, eyes still closed, but she is moving.
The sight gives the rush of adrenaline needed to rip the sheet off your body and bring your feet to the floor. On wobbly legs, you rush to her cot, ignoring the woman's presence in favor of cupping Blue's cheeks, checking her pulse. Her skin is warm and the artery is beating steadily. You give her a little shake, but her eyes won't flutter.Â
"She might not wake for longer than you. Do not be worried. The dosage has a stronger effect on children."
You stiffen.
A snarl cuts through you as anger surges, ripping free from the pit in your chest.
"Dosage?"Â
You whirl around, careening toward the bars, gripping them when you almost lose your balance. "Do not be worried? You drugged a fucking child and shoved us in a cage." Your hands tighten, the metal biting into your skin. You don't care that your voice hurts from disuse. "Where are the others? Why aren't they here?" She startles back a step, her soft eyes downcast.
"I see you are upset," she says, her tone soft and careful. "I know this is... much for you. Sometimes God works in ways we do not understand right away, but I promise, He has blessed you. You are safe here." A light touch to her belly. Whispering now, she adds, "You are coveted."Â
Then, she lowers the other two mugs through the bars and slips out of the room, cloak silently brushing her feet.Â
Breathing hard, the energy deflates.
You half-crawl back to Blue's bed.
Staring at her pink cheeks.
Head pounding.
She claims you are safe. The lack of hostility might suggest that, but the enclosure and fact that she could not answer your question about the others say different.Â
You spend a strange amount of time sifting through the recesses in your brain, plucking the memories out, from the bloody chapel to the smoke to this, before Nereida shifts in her bed. Her eyes actually open, and then she is gazing around, the same process of understanding contorting on her face.Â
"Twix," she breathes. "What isâwhere are we?"
You tell her about Salome and everything you know, which is next to nothing.Â
"But the guysâ"
"I don't know where they are. She wouldn't tell me anything."
The mugs of porridge go cold.Â
You hear movement outside in the distanceâsomeone stepping through the grass, a passing exchange between French-speaking menâbut the window is on the other side of the bars.
"Maybe if we try to just..."
Nereida attempts to poke half of her face through the bars to look out, but by the way she claws at her hairline in frustration, you don't need to ask to know she can't see a thing.Â
Your muscles feel mostly in control now, and despite the howl in your stomach, you refuse to eat.
Nereida does, too. She does some silent prayerâif that's what you could call closing her eyes and humming hypnotically to herselfâand when she is done, she reopens them and says, "John will come soon. He will."
"They could be dead."
"We would know if they were."
"No, we wouldn't."
"I would know," she whispers, and circles her arms around her knees, thumbing the scar on her shoulder. "He isn't dead."
Neither of you speak for some time.Â
You watch Blue, her pulse steadying you, even if by a little. Absently, you stroke her hair. The pieces of the puzzle fall together with grim clarity. No weapons. Ghost, Price, Kyle, and Ari could be dead. The thought is a weight you can barely carry. You shove it away, refusing to let it consume you. If you let yourself linger too long on the possibility, you'll break down. You can'tâmerely for Blue's sake, not when you're holding onto the fragile thread keeping you together.
As the sunlight through the window starts to fade, you try to determine whether it's been a day or more since you were knocked out, and when exactly Salome will return. That's when Blue finally wakes up.
"Twix?"
Her lashes flicker.
"Blue. Blue, I'm here." You carefully scoop her in a tight hug, breathing her in closely.Â
"What... what happened?" She lamely pulls away, shoulders sagging, and trembles in confusion. "I can'tâI don't remember anything."
"We were drugged. SomeoneâI don't know who or whyâbut someone is keeping us in here."
"Are they going to kill us?" she whispers.
"I think they would have by now if they wanted to."
Her breath staggers. "But where isâwhy isn't Ghost here?"
You swallow. "I don't know if he... I don't know where he is."
Her eyes dart around.
"You mean my dadâhe could be..."
She clutches at the shift on her chest.
At first, when you see her eyes begin to gloss over, you fear she is in pain. But then the panic becomes palpable, tearing through her ability to breathe, and she starts clawing at her own skin.Â
"My dad is dead! My dad is fucking dead! He's not here. Why isn't he here!"
Her screams pierce the room.
You grab her wrists to stop the damage from her nails, welts already beating red on her neck.
"Blue, stop! Stop it!"
But she won't stop. She grabs the pillow and stuffs it in her mouth, howling into it, her face red and wet.
She begins to rock violently.
"I can't survive without him."
You watch helplessly, trying to hold her.Â
"Please, justâbreathe. We don't know if he'sâ"
The door opens. Salome rushes in beside an older woman similarly dressed in white.Â
"Le pauvre enfant a peur! Dieu montre ta grâce." The other woman carries the tray this time, with what looks to be more food along with a syringe. She hands it to Salome. "Dites-leur que cela aidera."
Salome offers the needle through the bars as you glare at her, tightening your arms around Blue. "This will help her calm down."
"I am not giving her that. Stay the fuck away."
Blue is shaking so hard she bumps her skull into your jaw. Nereida touches your arm. "Twix, it could help her."
"You don't know what the fuck they put in that thing," you hiss at her. "I'm not drugging her even more."
"I will leave it here for your choosing. Your dinner will not be hot for long. Please, all of you, eat." Salome bows her head as she places the syringe and tray on the floor in front of the cell, and leaves with the other woman before you can demand more from them.Â
It is only after minutes of listening to Blue scream, unable to stop her from scratching herself any longer, that you concede and ask Nereida to bring it to you. Carefully, you sweep the hair from her face, steadying the tremble in your hand as you sink the needle into a vein in her arm, with Nereida helping to keep it extended.
"There. Please, Blue, please calm down. We cannot think the worst. Not yet, okay?" Your eyes threaten moisture but you blink hard to keep it at bay.
Whatever it was acts the moment it seeps into her bloodstream. She sags into you, face turning sticky as the tears are given time to dry, and her wailing dies down to silence.Â
"Are you hungry?"Â
She shakes her head.
That first night is spent without sleeping.Â
You entangle yourself with Blue in the cot, watching the evening turn to a sliver of moonlight across the floor. She doesn't fall asleep, either, oscillating between silent tears and a void stare at the ceiling. Nereida stays in her own bed, humming here and there in that way that she does. At one point, you hear her whisper into the pillow: "John, give me strength. You always do."
You keep your emotions steady by counting the notches in Blue's spine, one by one, then starting back at the top. As you do, you think about what Salome said. You are not just safe, you are coveted. They want you to eat. They are not trying to harm you. Coveted. She's touched her stomach when she said it. The connection between it all grows starker in your mind.Â
You share this with Nereida at the break of dawn when Blue seems to finally have succumbed to fatigue.
"They want us because we are women. That's why the others aren't here."
She nods, whispering. "I was thinking the same."
"Then we use that to our advantage."
"How?"
You palm your temple. "I don't know. I mean, we have some standing here. They value us in some way, right?"
"But we don't even know who 'they' includes," she murmurs, leaning her forehead briefly against the wall, then sitting straighter. "There are men here, too. That much we know. And if they were able to take out all of us at once, then there could be many."
"But none have come to see us," you point out. "Why is that?"
"Because they aren't allowed to." She places a finger on the wall, drawing it around, as if it helps her think. "Why would they be? We are coveted, remember? Something to be protected. Why else would they bother feeding us and keeping us tucked away in here."
"So maybe the guys aren't dead yet," you exhale, wishfully. "Maybe they are just in separate... housing or something. Another cell of their own. Kept away from the women, that's all."
Based on the interior of the room, this feels it was once a small, detached home. Maybe on a farm. The walls are painted stone; cold to the touch. All of the buildings you recall seeing on your way here were old, little farmhouses. Perhaps they have an established settlement.Â
Mewling it over, you finally touch the cold food, taking a small bite of the cut-up meat to confirm it's something you haven't tasted in years: beef. They have cattle. What else do they have? Drugs, apparently. Or at least some type of sedatives extracted from plants. They are well-versed in the land. They are religious. And women are coveted for reproduction.Â
"But then what was the shit in that chapel for?" you whisper to yourself, the image of the mangled body staining the backs of your lids when you close them.
When they reopen, Salome is at the doorway.
"Bonjour, mesdames. I have some oatmealâ" she frowns at the tray on the floor. "Oh... my. You have not eaten for two days. This is not the Lord's wishes. Your bodies are chosen, and they are in need ofâ"
"Tell us where they are, and weâll eat," you cut her off, rising to your feet. You grip the bars tightly. "Tell us if they're still alive. One of them is her father. If you don't want her screaming again, you will tell us if he's okay."
She stares at you, then nods. "Eat first. All of you."
The oatmeal is sweetened with ripe blackberries that burst on your tongue. Blue awakens just when you and Nereida finish scarfing the last bite. You hand her the last bowl of oatmeal and urge her to eat, knowing that Salome won't cooperate if she doesn't. Blue takes minuscule bites. She hacks some of it back up, but with a sip of water passed through the cage, she is able to finish the rest.
She wipes a hand over her mouth and looks at Salome. "My dad. Where is he?" Her voice is low.
"He is alive. Of course, he is. They all are." A tremendous sense of relief washed over you. She cups her belly, her fingers tracing the shape. "Life is sacred... and so is death. We must be careful not to let more death come than is needed. The world... it has already seen too much of it."
Your brow scrunches. "Bullshit. I saw that corpse you guys left in theâ"
Nereida gives your wrist a light squeeze, a reminder to hold back. You bite your tongue, knowing this woman is the only one who might give you any answers.
Salome tilts her head slightly, her expression unreadable. "I do not mean the world does not deserve the plague it bears. Men... they grew too sinful. Strayed far from God's will. It was His plan for them to atone for it." Her lips stretch into a faint smile, a thin, almost sad expression. "Your friendsâthey cannot come closer to God until they make amends. They must atone before they can be worthy of the future we will bring."
You blanch. "What the hell does that mean? 'They must atone?'"
Her gaze drifts to the left, and she mutters something under her breath in French, her words faint, then lowers her head to collect the tray, her back to you. You canât hold yourself back any longer, pushing your face between the bars. "Donât you fucking dare. Youâve hardly told us anything!"
"I... I fear I cannot say more." She pauses, glancing over her shoulder. "You are in a delicate state, and Maman will see to you today. Please... trust me, this is the way it must be."
Maman?
The door quietly clicks shut and you growl at it.
A hand cups your shoulder.Â
"She told us they're alive. That's what matters, right?'
You face Blue, leaning your spine into the metal. "Yeah. But we still have no way of getting to them."
The red rim around her eyes has faded to the same flush as her lips. She takes a slow breath through her chest, clenching and unclenching her hands, before asking, "What do you think they are doing to them?"
"I don't know," you say with a heavy exhale, your tongue pressing between your cheek and teeth.
G
Pennies.
When Ghost swims to the surface of semiconsciousness, the smell of pennies wafts up his nose first, then the feel of icy, hard restraints around his wrists hits him second. It is the kind of smell that is deeply woven into the floors and walls. Old blood calling for new. He could remember smelling it for the first time in Mexico when he'd awoken in a cell, stripped. The flush of air against his chest suggests this time is now different, but upon forcing his lids apart, a glance downward reveals he still has jeans on.
Ghost thinks he hears someone scream his nameâSimon!âbut it is merely a memory from right before the world went dark. He'd fought against it all he could, keeping the tail of Twix's shirt in one hand, and trying to seek Blue with the other, but then he had to choose one to let go of to grab his gun. The memory swims up to the forefront; the fumbling of his fingers at his belt loop, seeking the pistol, the loss of motor function as something pricked his neck. The pistol slipped from his grasp, and so did they.
He forces the reel of Twix's screams to the back of his mind where they play in a distant loop. Through hazy vision, he looks around, taking in the lack of light. No windows. It is a small room, with grey stone walls, and only one door at the far end. None of the others are here. Not the girls or Price or Gaz. There wouldn't even be space for all of them to fit in here. The shackles on his wrists are rusty, nicking his skin when he tries to shift around. His heart thumps steady and slow between his ears. Whatever they drugged him with is fading with each shake of his head and forced blink of his eyes.
He tugs on the manacles once more in vain when there is a voice from the other side of the wall.
It is muffled through stone, but grows crisper as booted footsteps close in.
Then they stop.
The door creaks open.
The man who steps in is cloaked in grey.
He waves a metal bar, whistling lowly, and kicking the door shut behind him.Â
"You must be an early riser." His chuckle is wry. "Up before your friends. Tell me, Brit. What brings you all the way to l'Hexagone? Not a fun trip over the water, is it?"
The man circles him. A light tap of the bar on his bare shoulder blade.Â
"No? Not much of a sharer?" The end of the bar presses in, just slightly, but the pain doesn't register. Only the cold wetness of a trickle of blood on his back when it pulls away. A hand fists his hair, and yanks his head back. "Nous allons rÊgler ça, sale racaille. Je me ferai un plaisir de t'aider à retrouver la lumière."
His head is thrown forward with force. Ghost blinks down at the floor, teeth grinding. Through them, he breathes hardâ
"Where are they?"
"Which ones? The pretty ones?" The accented voice lowers to the shell of his ear. "I would not get your hopes up of seeing them again. They will be saved for the most worthy of us."
- Nous devons expier nos pÊchÊs...We must atone for our sins. - Tu es rÊveillÊe!...You're awake! - Le pauvre enfant a peur! Dieu montre ta grâce....The poor child is afraid. God show your grace. - Dites-leur que cela aidera...Tell them it will help. - Nous allons rÊgler ça, sale racaille. Je me ferai un plaisir de t'aider à retrouver la lumière...We'll sort this out, you dirty scum. I'll be happy to help you get back to the light.
art creds to to_0fu (twitter/x)
pairing â college sukuna! x reader
synopsis â of all the people in your chemistry course, you get stuck with ryomen sukunaâthe most insufferable, arrogant asshole on campus. he barely does any work, runs his mouth like itâs a sport, and somehow manages to make your life even more exhausting than it already is. if this project doesnât kill you, he just might.
wc â 26k (ONLY 1K ABOVE THE EXPECTED WC YAAAY)
warnings â explicit sexual content (unprotected sex), sukuna is quite mean in the beginning, possibly incorrect depiction of frat culture (spare me i am not american), lots of sexual jokes, brief tiny smidge of angst, reader is a bad bitch, mentions of feeling insecure, choso and toji are gym himbos.
âPlease, anyone but him, professorââ You try begging, hands gripping the edge of the desk like your life depends on it. You know itâs useless, but desperation makes a fool out of you.
Professor Shimizu sighs, sympathy flashing across her face, but itâs gone in an instant. She adjusts her glasses, pushing them up her nose, and gives you a rueful smile. âI understand your concerns,â she says, âand if it were up to me, Iâd happily rearrange the groups, but the pairings were assigned by the department. Something about fostering academic cooperation.â She shakes her head like she, too, thinks itâs bullshit. âMy hands are tied.â
Your stomach sinks. Fostering academic cooperation? With him? Youâd have better luck reasoning with a brick wallâone that could talk back and insult you for fun. You turn back toward the class, eyes darting between the clusters of students already deep in discussion. Some of them look at you with poorly concealed amusement, others with pity. And then thereâs him, sitting by the window, looking positively bored like this whole situation is an inconvenience.Â
Ryomen Sukuna.
The campus heartthrob. The golden boy of the mechanical engineering department. A nightmare wrapped in a six-foot-something frame of smugness and muscle. A nightmare that you unfortunately have to share your CHEM10002 course with (why heâd picked a premed course as an elective was beyond you) You hate him. And not in the petty ugh, heâs annoying kind of way. Itâs deeper than that. Heâs insufferable. Arrogant. Egotistical. The type of guy who always has a girl in his bed but never the same one twice. He walks around campus like he owns the place, flashing that sharp grin, that lazy confidence that makes peopleâgirls, especiallyâfawn over him despite his reputation. Cocky, rude, impossible to work with.
And now youâre stuck with him. Oh, hell no. Your body stiffens. No way. No fucking way. Like hell youâre going to spend the next few weeks working with him. You whip your head back to Professor Shimizu, grasping at anythingâanythingâto get out of this. âWhat if I did extra credit? A research paper? A presentation? Anything,â you plead, voice tight. âIâll take a lower grade. Dock my participation. I donât careâjust not him.â
She sighs, but itâs not exasperated, just⌠tired. âI appreciate your enthusiasm,â she says, like youâre asking for more work because you love learning instead of trying to escape an actual nightmare. âBut, again, I canât change the pairings. And as much as Iâd love to give you an alternative assignment, the department is very strict on this. Itâs meant to âchallenge students to collaborate beyond personal preference.ââ She air-quotes it, which means she definitely thinks itâs bullshit. You slump, stomach twisting with something bitter. Collaboration? With Sukuna? The only thing he collaborates on is making everyoneâs life harder.
You grit your teeth, hard. Heâs lounging now, one hand shoved in his pocket, the other lazily spinning a pen between his fingers while he lazily eyes you from where heâs manspreading in his seat. He doesnât even look like heâs trying, and thatâs what pisses you off the mostâhe never tries. Not in class, not with people, not with anything. Everything just seems to work out for him anyway.
You hate that you know that. You really hate that you know that. But youâve known him long enough. Long enough to rememberâ
It was something small. Stupid, even. But you still remember the heat of humiliation crawling up your neck, the way people laughed under their breath, how he barely even looked at you afterward, like it hadnât mattered. You had been in a required first-year seminar, and the professor called on you to answer a question. It wasnât hard, but the nerves got the best of youâyou stumbled over your words, your voice wavered.
And then you heard it. A tsk, followed by a lazy, mocking lilt:
âDamn. Spit it out, dumbass.â
Heat flushed through you, the classroom suddenly too bright, too small. A few people chuckledâsome outright laughed. You had swallowed thickly, willing yourself to focus, to get through the answer. When class ended, you stormed out, ignoring the lingering stares, the murmured that was brutal from some guy behind you. But Sukuna? He didnât even glance your way. Because to him, it wasnât anything. It wasnât worth a second thought. And now, here you are, stuck working with the one person who had made you feel like an idiot before you even had the chance to prove yourself.Â
You hadnât even thought about it that much at the timeânot really. But later, when you were alone, it festered. You were just a freshman. Barely out of high school, still figuring things out, still nervous about speaking up in a room full of people smarter, older, better than you. It wasnât even like you got the answer wrongâyou had just hesitated. That was all it took. And it was stupid, so stupid, but after that day, you started thinking twice before speaking in class. Before raising your hand. Before answering anything unless you were absolutely sure you wouldnât trip over your words. And god, you hate that it got to you. Itâs not like it was some big, scarring moment. It was one second of his life. A second he probably doesnât even remember.
But it was yours. It wasnât just that one time. There was another. Worse, somehow, because this time, he hadnât even been speaking to youâjust about you. It was late freshman year, after youâd spent the whole semester training yourself not to stutter, not to hesitate, not to embarrass yourself again. You were doing better. At least, you thought you were. Until one afternoon, outside the student center, when you walked past Sukuna and his group of friendsâToji, Choso, Mahito, and a couple of others, all leaned back on the benches like they owned the place.
You werenât eavesdropping. You didnât mean to hear it. But thenâ
ââwas struggling so bad, I thought she was gonna pass out.â
A few chuckles. A low whistle from Toji.Â
âLike, just say it, dumbass,â Sukuna scoffed, sharp, mocking. âOr at least commit. That shit was painful to listen to.â
Your stomach dropped. You donât know who they were talking about. Maybe some other poor freshman who had choked on their words mid-discussion. Maybe a random classmate. Maybeâ
Your face burned. You forced yourself to keep walking, head down, pretending like it wasnât about you, like you werenât suddenly back in that seminar with his voice in your ears and everyoneâs quiet snickers pressing into your skin. He didnât even look at you as you passed. Of course, he didnât. He probably didnât even remember it was the same person. And now, three years later, you have to sit across from Ryomen Sukuna, the campus asshole, the man who probably hasnât stuttered a day in his goddamn life, and pretend you donât want to walk out of this classroom and never come back. You exhale sharply, pressing your fingers into your temples.
This is fine. Youâve dealt with annoying people before. Youâve had to work with partners who contributed nothing, who slacked off, who treated group projects like free rides. Sukuna is just another roadblockâone with a stupid face and a worse attitude.
And, honestly? Itâs not even about the stuttering thing anymore. That was years ago, and youâd be damned if you let some insignificant moment from freshman year shake you now. Just because he made you insecure about one thing doesnât mean youâre meek. Youâve worked too hard to let this get to you. So, with all the grace you can muster, you pull out the chair across from him, stiffly sit down, and say, âHi, Iâmââ
Sukuna doesnât even look at you. Doesnât acknowledge you. Doesnât even pretend to try. Instead, he leans back in his chair, stretching his arms behind his head, and immediately starts talking to Toji, whoâs standing nearby.
âSo, dinner at that steak place tonight?â
âYeah,â Toji mutters, tapping at his phone. âGonna see if theyâve got space.â
Sukuna scoffs. âThey always have space.â
âNo, dumbass, last time we went, they were booked.â
âThey let us in last time,â Sukuna corrects, smirking, and that smugness makes your eye twitch. Are you being fucking ignored? You glance between them, incredulous, and then say, âIâm literally talking to you.â
That finally gets his attention. Slowly, like youâre the inconvenience here, Sukuna turns his head toward you. His gaze flicks over you, slow, unimpressed, like heâs barely registering you exist. You square your shoulders. âThis project is quite hefty. We need to split up the research so weâre not scrambling at the last minute.â
He stares at you for a moment, blank, and thenâ
He rolls his eyes.
âJesus,â he mutters, leaning forward, elbows on the table. âYouâre one of those, huh?â
You frown. âExcuse me?â
âThe tryhard type. Gets assigned a little homework and suddenly thinks theyâre running a Fortune 500 company.â He tilts his head, smirking. âRelax, woman. Itâs just a project.â
Woman. Your jaw clenches so hard it hurts.Â
âThat âlittle homeworkâ is forty five percent of our grade,â you bite out.
âDonât give a fuck,â he grunts, sounding bored.
You inhale deeply. âSo, I was thinkingââ
But he groans, dragging a tattooed hand down his face. âAre we seriously doing this now?â
âYes, weâre seriously doing this now,â you snap. He exhales sharply through his nose, glaring. âGod, youâre fucking annoying.â
Youâre not sure whether you should be offended or hurt. On one hand, obviously as a normal human being, being spoken to like this from a person youâre quite literally talking to for the first time is bound to hurt your feelings. On the other hand, this guyâs dickhead personality is kind of well known through your university. Your grip on your pen tightens, but you keep your voice even.
 âIâm annoying because I want to pass?â
âYouâre annoying because you talk way too fuckinâ much.â
 That stings more than youâd like to admit. You grit your teeth, ignoring the way your stomach tightens, and push forward anyway. âIf we divide the research today, we wonât have to meet up as often,â you say, firmly. âI assume youâll want to do as little work as possible, so letâs justââ
âHoly shit.â Sukuna pushes his chair back with a loud scrape, fixing you with an exasperated look. âDo you ever shut up?â You blink, stunned. Toji snickers.
âOh, come on,â Sukuna scoffs, throwing up a hand. âYouâre gonna sit there all wide-eyed like I just kicked your fuckinâ puppy? You started it.â Your fingers twitch against the table. âStarted what?â you ask, voice dangerously calm. âThis whole thingâacting like Iâm some bum ass delinquent who needs a babysitter.â His eyes narrow. âIf you wanna play boss, go find some other loser to be a bitch to.â
Your patience snaps. âOr you could just not be a lazy asshole. Do you lack brain cells? Youâve seriously told me to shut up like 5 times in the span of about ten minutes. Do you have a problem where you canât focus?â The air between you shifts.
Sukunaâs jaw tics. His expression darkens, something sharp flashing through his eyes, but then his lips pull into something crueler than a smirkâsomething with edges, something dangerous.
âYou think Iâm lazy? Got somethinâ wrong with me because I canât take your nerdy bitching?â he asks, voice low. You hesitate, but only for a second. âGlad you have the ability to comprehend what I said.â That makes him grin. âAnd you think Iâm an asshole?â
âYes.â
He hums, tilting his head. Then he leans forward, just slightly, elbows resting on the table. His voice drops into something smug, mockingâ
âThen why the fuck are you still talking to me?â
Your blood boils.
What the fuck is his problem?
You lean forward too, matching him, refusing to shrink under his gaze. âBecause I have to, dumbass,â you snap. âI tried to change my group. I begged. I offered to do extra credit. I would have written a whole goddamn thesis if it meant not sitting across from youâbut guess what?â You gesture sharply between you. âIâm stuck with you.â
Sukuna raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. âTragic.â
You let out a frustrated breath, gripping the edge of the table so hard your knuckles turn white. âSo, as much as Iâd love to pretend you donât existââ
âThen do it,â he interrupts, tone dry.
You blink. âWhat?â
âIf you wanna pretend I donât exist, go ahead,â he drawls, leaning back lazily. âDo the whole project yourself. Youâll probably enjoy it, since youâre clearly getting off on playing group leader.â
âOh, my god.â You clench your fists, barely restraining yourself. âWhy are you such a dickhead? Parents not teach you basic respect?â
âBecause you donât shut the fuck up,â he snaps, finally looking genuinely irritated.
Your lips part, incredulous. âIâm literally just trying to do the fucking project? Like any normal human being?â
âNo, youâre trying to control shit,â Sukuna says flatly. âLike this is some big dealâlike I havenât passed a million of these useless classes already.â
You stare at him. âYou think this is useless?â
He smirks. âYeah.â
Oh, you hate him.
âSome of us actually give a shit about our grades, Sukuna.â
âYou know my name? Cute.â You inhale sharply through your nose, trying to stay calm, trying not to launch your textbook at his stupid, perfect face. âI donât care how many classes youâve passed,â you say, voice taut. âYouâre doing this one with me. I care about this project. And if I have to suffer through working with you, you can at least pretend to give a shit.â He tilts his head, mockingly thoughtful. âMm. No.â
You exhale slowly, tryingâfailingâto stop your hands from curling into fists.
âI swear to godââ
âWhat, huh?â he cuts in, voice dripping with condescension. âYou gonna whine to the professor again?â He lets out a low chuckle, shaking his head. âPathetic.â
Your jaw tightens. He grins, like heâs won something. Like heâs getting exactly what he wantsâlike this is a game to him, something to toy with, something to waste his time on. And you refuse to let him win. So, you straighten your spine, lift your chin, and meet his gaze without flinching. âFine,â you say, voice steely. âIf you want to half-ass this, be my guest. Just donât expect me to pick up your slack.â
Sukuna watches you, amused, as if heâs waiting for you to crack. When you donât, he smirks.
âWeâll see.â
You inhale sharply, forcing yourself to keep your voice level.
âWell, unfortunately for you,â you say stiffly, âyou actually have to do your share.â
Sukuna snorts. âSays who?â
âThe professor.â You cross your arms. âSince apparently, students have been slacking on group projects, we have to submit proof of collaborationâmeeting logs, progress updates, actual proof that weâre working together.â His expression darkens. You fight the urge to smirk. Suffer.
âYouâve gotta be fucking kidding me,â he mutters.
âNope.â You press your lips together, trying to hold back your pure satisfaction. âSo, congratulations, Sukuna. You have to meet up with me at least once a week.â He exhales sharply through his nose, glaring at you like youâre personally ruining his life. âYouâre telling me I have to sit through this shit every week?â
âYep.â
âYou specifically?â
âYep.â
Sukuna groans, dragging a hand through the unruly pink strands of his hair. Then, just as youâre about to remind him that this is literally his problem for being a shit student, he lifts his headâeyes raking over you in a slow, lazy once-over. And then, he smirks. You freeze.
âWhat?â you snap, immediately on edge.
His smirk widens.
âNah, I was just thinking,â he drawls, tipping his head back against his chair. âIf you were hotter, this would be way less painful.â
Your stomach drops. The words hit you like a slap, and for a second, all you can do is sit there, stunned, completely caught off guard by how casualâhow easyâit is for him to say something like that. Like itâs just true. Like itâs a fact. Your fingers dig into your sleeve. And the worst part? Itâs not even the insult itself that stingsâitâs the sheer, blatant dismissal. The fact that he looks at you and immediately decides youâre not worth even pretending to be interested in. As if you were hoping for his attention. As if you were seeking his approval.Â
âYeah?â you say, voice flat, emotionless. âWell, if you were smarter, I wouldnât have to carry your useless ass through this class.â His grin falters, just barely, but you see itâand for once, itâs your turn to smirk. You lean forward, matching his posture, tilting your head mockingly.
âGuess weâre both disappointed, huh?âÂ
For a moment, Sukuna just stares at you. And you donât miss the way his jaw tightens, how his fingers twitch against the table like heâs fighting the urge to rip you apart. Good. Thenâhe exhales sharply through his nose, tipping his chair back slightly, acting unfazed even though you saw the flicker of irritation in his eyes. âDamn,â he muses, voice slow, dragging. âDidnât know you had a mouth on you.â
âYeah?â You tilt your head. âDidnât know you gave a shit.â
Sukuna scoffs. âI donât.â
âThen shut the fuck up and do your assigned work.â
He lets out a low, mean laugh, running a hand through his hair. âYouâre lucky Iâm feeling generous today.â
âGenerous?â You nearly choke. âYouâve been nothing but a dick since the moment I sat down.â
He shrugs, unbothered. âCould be worse.â
You want to strangle him. Instead, you inhale sharply through your nose, pressing your palms flat against the table before forcing yourself to stay on track. âWhatever,â you say, shaking your head. âHereâs the deal: we have to meet at least once a week. I donât care where. I donât care when. But we need to get the work done, and I need proof that you were actually presentâbecause if we donât, we both fail.â
Sukuna glares at you, as if the very concept of responsibility offends him.
âFucking hell,â he mutters, dragging a hand down his face again. âYouâre really gonna be a hardass about this, huh?â
You raise an eyebrow. âYou donât care about failing?â
âNot really.â
Your eyes narrow. âThen why are you even in this class?â
At this, he finally drops his chair back down onto all four legs, leaning in slightly. âLetâs get one thing straight,â he says, voice lower, more serious. âI donât need this shit. Iâm here because my old man thinks I should at least pretend to give a fuck about college.â He smirks, sharp and taunting. âBut donât get it twistedâI donât actually give a fuck.â You pause, studying him, trying to piece together the weight behind his words. Of course, you know he comes from money. Everyone does. The Ryomen family name carries weight, old money, power, prestigeâso it makes sense that college, for him, is just some bullshit obligation rather than a means to a future. Still, something about the way he says itâhow bitter it soundsâsticks with you. Not that you care.
You roll your eyes. âRight. Got it. Poor little rich boy.â
His smirk drops.
For a second, thereâs silence.
Thenâ
âYou know what?â Sukuna says, voice eerily calm. âFine. Iâll meet up with you.â
You blink, a little thrown off by how easily he gives in.
ââŚOkay?â
âBut.â His gaze darkens, and the corner of his mouth twitches, almost like heâs daring you to argue. âYou work around my schedule.â
Your stomach twists with irritation. âThatâs notââ
âNot my problem,â he cuts in smoothly, leaning back in his chair. âI donât do morning meetups. I donât do last-minute bullshit. And if you start bitching about how I âdonât take this seriously,ââ he mocks, voice lilting high, âI will walk out and leave you with an automatic fail. Or whatever the fuck happens to your grade if the other person doesnât do their part. Got it?â Your blood boils. But what can you do? You already tried to get reassigned. So, through gritted teeth, you say, âFine.â
Sukuna smirks.
âGood girl.â
â
You should have known it was going to be hell the second he suggested meeting at the East Wing library. Itâs the furthest damn library on campusâtwenty minutes from the dorms, uphill, and completely out of the way. Not a single other student in your class would have chosen that location. And yet, when you tried suggesting the much closer, more convenient library, Sukuna had just shrugged, barely sparing you a glance as he packed up his bag.
âAw, did you forget that Iâm in charge of where we meet up?,â he drawled, voice dripping with fake sympathy. âThat sounds like a you problem.â
And just like that, the decision was final. So now, here you are, twenty minutes later, climbing the last flight of stairs to the East Wing library, already in a foul mood before the study session has even started. And when you finally get there? You find Sukuna kicked back in his chair at one of the study tables, feet up, scrolling through his phone like heâs waiting on room service instead of his own damn groupmate.
No laptop. No notes No book. Just his phone. Un-fucking-believable. You drop your bag onto the chair across from him, loudly, but he doesnât even flinch. Doesnât look up. Doesnât acknowledge your presence at all.
âSeriously?â you deadpan, arms crossing. Sukuna exhales through his nose, still not looking at you. âTook you long enough.â You almost black out from rage.
âOh, Iâm sorry,â you say, voice flat. âMy dorm is on the opposite side of campus.â He hums, barely acknowledging your words, his focus glued to his phone. You take a deep breath, count to three, and pull out your laptop. âOkay. So, the projectââ
Before you can even finish, his phone rings. And instead of silencing it, like a normal human being, Sukuna just smirks and answers it, right there in front of you. âYo,â he says lazily, stretching his arms behind his head. Your eye twitches. The person on the other endâyou recognise the voice as Chosoâsays something that makes Sukuna huff a laugh, shaking his head.
âYeah, yeah, Iâm at the library,â he mutters. âWith that chick from class.â Your hand tightens around your pen. So he didnât even know your name. Great. And you two were supposedly paired for the rest of this semester? You wanted to fucking die. Not even two minutes in, and heâs already testing your patience. Sukuna leans back, grinning as Choso says something else. âNah, itâs just her,â Sukuna says, completely offhand. âNo eye candy here, bro.â
Your grip tightens around your pen. Did this dumbass seriously just say that out loud? In a library? In the middle of your study session? You drop your pen onto the table with a sharp thud, but the sting in your chest lingers. Itâs not like you expected anything different from him. Itâs not like you cared.
âŚExcept you do. Just a little. Not because you want him to think youâre prettyâfuck noâbut because thereâs something uniquely humiliating about being dismissed like that. Like your presence is some minor inconvenience he has to tolerate. Your jaw locks, and you square your shoulders, forcing the feeling down. Screw him. Youâre not here to impress him. Youâre here to get your damn work done. Sukuna finally glances up, raising a brow like he just now realized youâre sitting there. You stare at him, completely done. He hums, completely unbothered, before turning his focus back to his phone. âRelax. You look like someone stuck a stick up your ass.â
âGenuinely do you have a mental illness or some shit?,â you shoot back, your irritation reaching an all-time high. âWe have a chemistry project thatâs 45% of our grade, and youâre sitting here talking aboutââ
âBro, hold on,â Sukuna suddenly says into the receiver, cutting you off mid-rant. He holds his hand up like heâs physically silencing you, turning his head away. âChoso, you hear this? Shortyâs about to pop a blood vessel over some homework. All âcause I said she isnât some eye candy. Women, right?â
Your mouth falls open.
Did he justâ
âIâ Youââ
Your brain short-circuits for a second, tripping over the sheer audacity of him. Sukuna leans back in his chair, grinning up at you like a complete bastard. âYou need to get laid or something?â A beat of silence. Your entire body stills. And then, without hesitation, you lean forwards and rip his phone out of his hand and slam it face-down in front of you.
âThe fuck?â Sukuna scoffs, finally looking genuinely surprised for the first time all day. Then, his smirk returns, and he props his chin on his hand, clearly amused. âYou got some nerve,â he muses.Â
âAnd you have the IQ of a fucking vegetable, but weâre still here.â
Sukuna huffs a laugh, shaking his head. âDamn. Whatâs got your panties in a twist?â
âMy panties in a twist?â you scoff, staring at him in pure disbelief. âYou refuse to work, you talk shit about the way I look while Iâm sitting right here, and youââ
âYou are sitting right there, and youâre not really hot enough for me to notice.â he interrupts smoothly. âWhat, you want me to lie?âÂ
Your eye twitches. âYou could at least pretend to have an ounce of human decencyââ
âPfft,â Sukuna snorts. âFor you?â Your nostrils flare. Sukuna just grins. âOh, come on,â he drawls, waving a hand. âYouâre taking this way too personally.â
âHowââ You press your fingers to your temples, inhaling sharply. âHow else am I supposed to take it when youââ
âAnd you,â Sukuna counters casually, âare a fucking headache.â You slam your hand against the table, startling the people sitting nearby. âAt least Iâm a headache with a work ethic. Youâre a pain in the ass and canât focus for like what? 2 seconds? Without spacing out.â
âCongrats,â he deadpans. âYou want a gold star?â
You want him to get hit by a bus.Â
Sukuna shakes his head, leaning back again, still looking far too entertained. âLook, we both know youâre gonna do most of the work anyway,â he says lazily. âSo why not just save yourself the stress and accept it?â
âBecause this is a group projectââ
âYeah, and Iâm in the group. So technically, that counts.â You inhale sharply, barely keeping yourself from lunging across the table.
âSwear to god, bro,â Sukuna snorts, having picked up his phone from where youâd slammed it down, resuming his call with Choso, âI got this chick sending me, like, three nudes back-to-back last night. Shit was insane.â
âYou are,â you say, voice flat, âfucking disgusting.â Sukuna smirks, clearly thriving off your irritation. âOh? Why, âcause I get pussy?â
âNo,â you snap, willing for your cheeks not to redden with the way he speaks so crudely. âBecause weâre supposed to be working.â
He hums, completely unbothered, before turning his focus back to his phone. âRelax. I got time.â You scoff. âOh, so you do know how deadlines work?â
âDamn,â Sukuna mutters, shaking his head, lips curling into an annoyed frown. âYouâre really pressed over this, huh?â
âThis is not happening,â you mutter under your breath. âI am not about to let some oversized thug skate his way through a semester while Iââ
âThug?â Sukuna repeats, laughing. âYou mean scholar? You hear that, Choso?â He puts his phone on speaker. âShe just called me a thug.â
âYeah, I heard,â Chosoâs voice comes through the speaker, lazy and unbothered. âSheâs right.â Sukuna snaps his head down at his phone. âThe fuck?âÂ
You bark out a sharp laugh, your first real one of the evening. Sukuna rolls his eyes and hangs up, tossing his phone onto the table with an annoyed click of his tongue. âChosoâs a bitch,â he mutters.
âAnd youâre a waste of oxygen.â Sukuna grins at you. âYouâre a piece of shit.â You snatch your textbook off the table and throw it at him, eye twitching when he easily manages to catch it.
âOh my god, please kill yourself and do us all a favourâ Sukuna laughs at that, tilting his head like heâs genuinely entertained by how close you are to losing your shit. âCâmon,â he drawls, placing his phone face-down on the tableâfinally giving you some attention. âLetâs hear it, then. Whatâs our big, bad, super important assignment?â
You exhale sharply, flipping open your notes. âItâs a research-based chemistry project. Weâre supposed to choose a topic related to reaction mechanisms and provide a full breakdown of the process. That includesââ
Sukuna leans back. âBoring.â You snap your notebook shut again. âOh my god.â He grins. âThis is really your shit, huh?â
âWhat?â
âThe nerdy little projects,â he teases, resting his chin on his hand. âBet youâre thriving right now.â You glare. âI am thriving off the idea of you getting hit by a bus.â Sukuna just chuckles, shaking his head. âViolent,â he muses. âDidnât think you had it in you.â You press your fingers against your temples. âI hate you.â
âYeah?â He smirks. âThatâs cute.â You inhale sharply. Exhale. Inhale again. This is fine. This is totally fine. He is just a guy. This is just a project. And you are not going to let him get under your skin. You open your notebook again, forcing yourself to focus. âOur topic isââ
Sukuna clicks his tongue. âOoooor,â he interrupts, leaning forward with a lazy smirk, âyou can just shut up and do it yourself.â
You pause. You blink at him, barely processing what he just said. He shrugs. âYouâre good at this shit. Iâm not. Seems fair.â Your jaw clenches. âHavenât you gotten it through your thick skull? Even if I wanted to, we have to constantly update all the meeting logs, andâ.â
Sukuna just smirks wider, cutting you off in true Sukuna fashion. âBut itâd be so much easier if you did all of it, wouldnât it? And those fucking collaboration logs can be faked.â You stare at him. You are going to lose your mind. You are actually going to lose your fucking mind. You inhale one last time, roll your shoulders back, and meet his gaze with renewed determination. âLetâs get one thing straight,â you say, voice sharp. âIf you refuse to contribute, I will tell our professor. And you know that they take the reported behaviour for consideration the next time they mark a group assignment from literally any other class, yeah? â
Sukuna snorts. âSnitch.â You glare harder. âI donât care.â He clicks his tongue, shaking his head like youâre just so exhausting to deal with.
âSuch a pain in the ass,â he mutters, stretching his arms above his head. âBut whatever. Weâll see.âÂ
You stare him down. You know what that means. It means he has no intention of doing shit. You exhale slowly, clenching your jaw. This is going to be the longest semester of your life.
â
You try to keep your composure. You really, really do. But after a week of dealing with Ryomen fucking Sukuna, youâre already at your breaking point. Itâs bad enough that he refuses to contribute anything to the project. Bad enough that every time you try to get him to focus, he leans back in his chair like some smug, insufferable prince, making a point to not listen.
âOh, come on,â he drawls one day in class, stretching lazily in his seat while you sit next to him, barely keeping yourself from strangling him. His shirt rides up just a bit, flashing a sliver of tattooed skinâ and a happy trailâ and you look away on instinct. He deserves no admiration. âYou love this shit. Itâs kind of sweet, honestly. Doing all the work for me like this?â
Your grip tightens on your pen, knuckles going white. âI wouldnât have to if you actually did your part, dumbass.â
Unfortunately, the guy was worse than you had anticipated, so begrudgingly, only once or twice you had taken up his slack, deeming that he wouldnât get into too much trouble even if you complained to the professor. It wasnât too bad considering it was just the introductory part of the project, but you would probably complain if he pulled this shit in the middle of the semester when things got serious. Sukuna just smirks. That smirk. The kind that makes you want to throw something at his face. âDo I, though?â
Your eye twitches. âYes.â
âBecause, from where Iâm sitting, it looks like youâve already taken care of most of it.â He gestures lazily to your open notesâyour notes, where half the research under his name is written in your own handwriting because you were sick of waiting for him to do it. âAppreciate the help, baby.â Your jaw clenches. âYouââ
You exhale sharply, fingers flexing against your notebook. You swear, if murder wasnât illegalâ
Across the table, Choso (They had been lounging here with him even before you had arrived, and you were sleep deprived and tired from the venture to the East wing from your dorm, so you kept your mouth shut about their presence) chuckles. âDamn, Sukuna,â he muses, lips quirking as he glances between the two of you. âSheâs really out here doing your degree for you.â Toji snorts. âShit, at this point, just put her name on your diploma.â
You snap your head toward them, scowling. âIâm notââ
âOh, but you kinda are,â Sukuna interjects smoothly, smirking. âDonât worry, sweetheart. Iâll make sure to give you a nice lilâ thank you when I graduate.â You glare. âI donât want your fucking thanks. I want you to do your damn work.â Sukuna just clicks his tongue and leans back, propping his feet up on the chair next to him like he has not a single care in the world. âYeah, yeah,â he mutters, so fucking dismissive. âWeâll see.â
â
It gets worse. Because apparently, refusing to do work and making you look like an idiot in front of his friends isnât enough. No, of course not. Sukuna has to make sure you suffer. So, during one of your scheduled study sessions (during the most odd times of the day), while youâre actively trying to go over the research, Sukunaâin all his dickhead gloryâleans back in his chair, tilts his head toward the nearest girl, and flashes that cocky, stupid toothy smile of his.
âHey,â he purrs, voice dropping into that low, slow tone that has half the campus wrapped around his fucking finger. âYou got a pencil?â The girl blinksâclearly flusteredâbefore fumbling through her bag. âUhâyeah! Yeah, here.â Sukuna smirks, taking it from her fingers way too slowly, thumb brushing against hers. The poor girl sucks in a sharp breath, eyes widening like sheâs just touched a live wire. He leans in just slightly, voice dropping to something just for her. âThanks, cutie. Real lifesaver.â
The girl giggles, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers. âYouâre welcome, Sukuna.â You knew he was an asshole. You knew that his stupid, irritating grin made girls fall over themselves. But this? This was just blatant disrespect. You were right there. He was doing this on purpose. And sure enough, when you glance up, Sukunaâs already watching youâmouth twitching, eyes glinting with amusement. You slam your book shut. âAre you done?â Sukuna raises an eyebrow, playing dumb. âWhat?â You gesture vaguely toward the poor girl, whoâs still blushing and dazed from his attention. âWith your little⌠whatever this is?â
His smirk stretches wider. âJealous?âÂ
Your nostrils flare. âIâm annoyed.â He hums, twirling the pencil between his fingers. âCouldâve fooled me.â You clench your fists under the table, swallowing the very real urge to dump your coffee on his head. You refuseârefuseâto let him get under your skin. So, instead, you take a breath, roll your shoulders back, and force your voice to stay level. âAre you actually going to contribute today, or should I just log that you didnât show up?â
Sukuna laughsâloud and unbothered. âDamn,â he drawls, leaning forward on his elbows. âYouâre kinda a hardass, huh?â You stare him down, unwavering. âAnd youâre a waste of fucking time.â His grin widens, something sharper, meaner curling at the edges of it.
âNow, thatâs just mean,â he muses, tapping the pencil against the table. âWhat happened, sweetheart? You just pissed off, or do you just need to get fucked? Seriously with the way you act so fuckinâ bitchy all the time, I swear you act like you havenât had dick in ages.â
You still for half a second. Then your jaw locks. Your entire body runs hot, blood boiling, because what the fuck? Youâre already on edge, and now heâs going there? You let out a short, sharp laugh, shaking your head. âYou speak so disgustingly, you know that? So weird and perverted...â Sukuna leans back again, sprawled out, totally relaxed. âWhat? Iâm just saying.â He gestures vaguely in your direction. âMaybe thatâs why youâre so uptight all the time.â Across the room, the girl from earlier glances over, eyes flicking between you and Sukuna like sheâs witnessing something amusing. You refuse to give herâor himâthe satisfaction. You inhale sharply, steadying yourself. And then, voice cold and clipped, you meet his gaze dead-on.
âDo your fucking work, Sukuna.â He grins. And then, of course, he doesnât.
â
The lecture hall is freezing, the air-conditioning cranked too high like the university is trying to keep students awake through sheer environmental hostility. It doesnât work. Youâre exhausted. After back-to-back shifts at work, an avalanche of coursework, and the black hole of stress that is your chem project with Sukuna, youâre running on fumes. The moment you step into the lecture hall, your eyes instinctively scan for the back row. Ifâwhenâyou inevitably start nodding off, you donât want the professor clocking it. You sink into a chair near the corner, stretching your legs out with a sigh. Heavy-lidded eyes drift toward the front, barely focusing on the professor setting up slides. You could close your eyes just for a secondâ
The seat next to you creaks. A familiar presence drops beside you, and you know who it is before you even turn your head. Sukuna. Of course. You donât acknowledge him. Maybe if you ignore him, heâll take the hint andâ
His knee knocks against yours, jostling you just as your head dips forward. Your body tenses, and you snap a glare in his direction. Heâs manspreading like he owns the place, legs sprawled wide, one arm slung over the back of your chair like this is his personal space and not a public lecture hall. Heâs wearing one of those long-sleeve compression shirts that clings to his frame, every inked line of muscle pressing against the fabric. Not that you care. But the sheer arrogance of it is annoying. You scowl, shifting as far away from him as possible. âWhy are you here?â
âDunno,â he drawls, voice low and amused. âFelt like it.â You roll your eyes and turn back toward the front, trying to focus on the professorâs voice. Your brain is barely keeping up with the lecture, exhaustion pressing against your skull like a weight. Sukuna doesnât let up. He leans in just enough to make his presence known. âDamn,â he muses, eyes dragging over your face with something unreadable. âYou look rough. Didnât get the chance to put on concealer or whatever you women use to cover up that?â The words land heavier than they should. Itâs the way he says it. Careless. Blunt. No humor to soften the edge. And you know youâre not uglyâ the opposite in fact, butâ
Your face drops before you can stop it. You donât have the energy to fight back today. You just swallow whatever sharp retort you could say, fix your gaze on the front of the lecture hall, and pretend like he doesnât exist. Sukuna notices. For the first time in ever, he doesnât get the reaction he expects. No snark, no glare, no half-assed insult thrown back at him. Just⌠silence. You donât even look at him. Something weird stirs in his chest, something unfamiliar and fucking irritating. It sits in the back of his throat, in the pit of his stomach, but he ignores itâbrushes it off like itâs nothing. He doesnât say another word for the rest of class.
â
By the time the second week of working with Sukuna rolls around, youâre wrecked. Sleep-deprived, overworked, running purely on caffeine and sheer spite. Between your job, your other classes, and this hellish project, there isnât a single moment to breathe. Youâve been taking shifts at work to make rent, pulling late nights cramming for exams, and somehow, despite your best efforts, Sukuna is still making your life miserable. The last thing you need is another study session with him. You drag yourself into the East Wing Library, exhausted and bitter about it. The East Wing is so far from your usual haunts, practically on the other side of campus, and the walk here in the late afternoon heat is hellish. You mumble complaints under your breath the entire wayâsomething about how your feet hurt, how this library is ugly anyway, how he shouldâve come to your spot insteadâbut you know Sukuna wonât care. He probably wonât even listen.
Sure enough, heâs already lounging at one of the study tables when you arrive, acting like heâs been here for hours when in reality, he probably sat down two minutes ago. Heâs slouched in his chair, all sprawled out and insufferable, wearing that same damn compression shirt that makes him look more like a gym rat than a student. His legs are spread so wide heâs practically taking up half the table. In fact, the table looks small compared to how long his legs are. You resist the urge to drop your bag onto his lap just to make him move. Instead, you sink into the chair across from him and immediately rest your forehead against your palm. âKill me,â you mutter.
Sukuna barely acknowledges you. âYou look like youâre already halfway there.â
You sigh heavily. You donât even have the energy to glare at him. âGee, thanks.â Heâs watching you. You can feel it. That lazy, assessing stare, like heâs about to say something thatâll make you want to slap him. Something thatâll make that weird, uncomfortable feeling go down your spine.
And thenâ
Nothing. You brace yourself for the insult, for the inevitable Damn, you look fucked up but it never comes. He just clicks his tongue, looking back at his laptop screen, eyebrows furrowed. You squint at him. Weird. But whatever. You donât have the time or patience to dissect the mysteries of Ryomen Sukunaâs behavior. You flip open your notes, rubbing at your eyes. âOkay, letâs just get this over with,â you mumble. âI still have an essay to write after this.â
Sukuna stretches, the fabric of his compression shirt shifting as he raises his arms above his head. His shirt rides up slightly, revealing a sliver of inked skin carved just above his hip. You donât mean to notice, but you doâbecause of course, heâs the type of asshole who shows off his tattoos like theyâre a personality trait. You snap your eyes away before he catches you looking. âRelax, woman,â he drawls, voice dripping with lazy amusement. âNo need to be so fucking tense.â
Your grip tightens around your pen. Woman? Again? You level him with an exasperated glare. âTense? Iâve been doing our project by myself while you sit on your ass, and Iâm the one whoâs tense?â You scoff. âAnd stop calling me woman, you sound like you get life advice from Andrew Tate.â That earns you a sharp, wolfish grin. âAre you not a woman?â he counters smoothly, tilting his head. Before you can answer, his eyes deliberately dropâslow, pointedâtrailing down to your chest. He doesnât even try to be subtle about it, and the sheer audacity of this man has you gaping at him, heat rushing to your face in a mixture of anger and secondhand embarrassment. Your jaw clenches, your hands curling into fists beneath the table. âAre you fucking serious?â you grit out, voice low and sharp.
Sukuna just smirks, lazy and unbothered, flicking his eyes back up to yours with a knowing look. âWhat? Just checking.â
You resist the urge to lunge across the table and strangle him on the spot. Just breathe. Donât get expelled for homicide.Â
âAlso, Andrew Tate? Seriously, woman? What, you think Iâd listen to a broke, bald bitch like him?â Sukuna leans forward, arms resting on the table, shoulders broad and imposing. âYouâve got some real shitty assumptions about me.â
âIâve got accurate assumptions about you,â you correct.
He just smirks. âYou say that like Iâve done nothing.â
You glare harder. âYou have done nothing.â
âHave I?â he challenges, cocking a brow. He tilts his laptop screen toward you, and there, staring back at you, is a shockingly filled-out document. Your eyes flicker across the paragraphsâcoherent, formatted, and even cited.
You blink. Pause. Stare at him like heâs just grown another head. Because for the past week, this man has contributed exactly two sentences to the project. ââŚAnd?â you say, deadpan. âWhat do you want? A gold star? A participation trophy?â Sukuna leans back, manspreading like the chair was custom-built just for him. âDonât need validation from you, sweetheart.â
âGood,â you shoot back. âBecause youâre not getting any.â He lets out an exaggerated sigh, rubbing a hand down his face like youâre the exhausting one here. âLook, I donât see what the big deal is. The projectâs coming along fine.â You inhale sharply. Count to five. Resist the urge to fling your notebook at his fat head. âItâs coming along fine because Iâve been doing all the work.â
Sukuna shrugs, unconcerned. âTeamwork makes the dream work.â You stare at him. A long, silent, murderous stare.Â
âYou make me wanna end my life,â you finally say, voice utterly devoid of emotion. He grins, teeth sharp and infuriating. âI know.â You exhale slowly through your nose, willing yourself not to commit homicide. Instead, you rub your temples and look back at your notes. âLetâs just finish this. I donât want to be here all night.â Sukuna hums, tapping at his laptop. âYou sound so eager to spend time with me. Desperate?â
âOh, absolutely,â you deadpan. âItâs the highlight of my week.â
âI knew it.â He smirks. âYou wanna spend the night with me, hmm? Naughty.â
You actually throw a pen at him this time. He dodges effortlessly, laughing under his breath. âFucking finally,â you mutter. âMaybe now youâll shutââ
âShhh!â
You both freeze. The librarianâan older woman with a stern face and sharp eyesâis glaring at you from the front desk. You and Sukuna exchange glances. âYouâre the one being loud,â you whisper harshly. Sukuna raises an eyebrow. âIâm the one being loud?â
âYes, youââ
âOut.â The librarianâs voice cuts through the air like a blade. You and Sukuna both go silent. And thenâ
ââŚShit,â Sukuna mutters, closing his laptop. You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. âYou are such a waste of time.â
âYeah, yeah.â He stands, stretching. âLetâs go, dumbass. You can yell at me somewhere else.â You glare at him as you gather your things. âI will be yelling at you somewhere else.â Sukuna smirks, shoving his hands into his pockets as he saunters toward the exit. âCanât wait.â You storm out of the library with Sukuna trailing behind you, still looking disgustingly relaxed for someone who just got thrown out of a public study space. You wish she had thrown him out alone. âDick,â you mutter under your breath, shoving your laptop into your bag as you walk. Your head throbs with exhaustion, and the last thing you need is him making this night even worse.
Behind you, Sukuna hums, amused. âYou say that like itâs a bad thing.â Your steps falter for half a second before you pick up the pace again. He, of course, notices. "You're so fucking touchy today," he drawls, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he strolls beside you, the very picture of unbothered arrogance. "On your period?" Your eye twitches. You suck in a sharp breath through your nose, gripping the strap of your bag so hard it might snap. "Okay, we're going to the study lounge near my dorm," you say, tone clipped.
Sukuna groans. Loudly. Like you're torturing him.Â
"The hell? Why?"
"Because you got us kicked out," you snap. "And we havenât even done half of what we were supposed to get through today." Sukuna clicks his tongue in irritation but doesnât argue further, shoving his hands into his pockets as he follows behind you. His pace is slower than yours, like this entire walk is beneath him, like heâs graciously putting up with it. You can practically feel his annoyance radiating off of him, thick and palpable in the evening air.
The east wing is far. Too far. Youâre used to it by nowâyour classes are scattered across campus, your dorm inconveniently placed, and your schedule an absolute disaster. Between balancing coursework, shifts at your part-time job, and somehow squeezing in study sessions, your days bleed into each other in a never-ending cycle of exhaustion. And because Sukunaâs the most infuriating person alive, heâs been forcing you to make this trek every damn day, dragging you out to the main library just so he can half-ass his way through this project in a space that he prefers. Youâve followed along because you refuse to let this assignment tank, but every second spent with him is another test of patience youâre not sure youâll pass. So when, predictably, about ten minutes into the walk, he lets out an exaggerated, loud huff of irritation, you already know something stupid is about to leave his mouth.
"Are we still walking?" he grumbles, scowling at the path ahead. "This is taking so fucking long." Your eye twitches. You keep walking, fists clenched at your sides, tryingâtryingâto ignore him. But he doesnât stop. Because of course he doesnât.
"This is stupid," he mutters. "Should've just stayed at the fucking library. Or better yet, we couldâve just worked at my placeâ"
And thatâs it. Thatâs the last straw. You snap.
"I do this every day because of you!"
The words come out harsher, sharper than you intended, but you donât care. You whirl around to glare at him, eyes blazing, voice rising louder than it should, this late at night. "You think this is taking too fucking long? You made me do this every night. You insisted on working at the damn library. You refuse to meet anywhere else because apparently, my dorm study lounge isnât good enough for you!" You huff out a breath, heart pounding in your chest. "So yeah, Sukuna, it is a long walk. And guess what? I do this every single day while you sit on your ass and complain!" Sukuna stops mid-step. His mouth is half-open, clearly ready to throw some cocky remark back at youâexcept nothing comes out. For once, heâs quiet. That, more than anything, unnerves you. But you donât stick around to decipher the look on his face. You turn back around and keep walking, jaw clenched, shoulders tense, because if you donât, you might actually lose your mind. And this project isnât worth a murder charge.
Sukuna watches as you keep walking, your back rigid with frustration, your fingers curled so tightly around the strap of your bag it looks like the only thing anchoring you upright. Itâs only now, in the dim glow of the overhead lights of the university hallways, that he actually sees you. The exhaustion carved deep into the lines of your face, etched into the tight pull of your brows and the faint downturn of your lips. The way your steps drag just slightly, like your body is moments away from giving in but you refuse to let it. The dark circles beneath your eyes, barely concealed by whatever concealer you mustâve swiped on this morning.Â
(Yes, you ended up feeling the tiniest bit hurt and put some on the next time you saw him)
You look tired. Not the kind of tired that comes from a late night or an early morning. No, this is the exhaustion that settles deep in your bones, that lingers even after youâve slept, the kind that never really leaves. And then thereâs something elseâsomething off. Itâs not like you to get this quiet after snapping at him. Normally, youâd keep going, pushing, throwing words at him like knives, sharp and ruthless, waiting for him to hurl them right back. Thatâs how itâs always been between you two. You say something snarky, he says something worse. You get pissed off, he laughs. Itâs a cycle. A game.
But right now? Right now, you donât fight. You donât even look at him. Sukuna exhales sharply through his nose, irritation flickering beneath his skinâbut itâs not directed at you. Not this time. He shoves his hands in his pockets, jaw clenching, his usual smirk nowhere to be seen. And for the rest of the walk, he doesnât say a word. No complaints. No grumbling. No sarcastic remarks. Just silence.
â
The place is smaller than the library, tucked into the corner of your dorm building, but at least itâs quiet. Fluorescent lights hum overhead, and only a few other students are scattered around, focused on their own work. You drop into a chair unceremoniously, opening your laptop with a sigh. Sukuna takes the seat across from you, stretching his legs out obnoxiously under the table until they almost bump into yours. You kick him. He smirks. âFeisty.â
"Shut up."
For the next half hour, you work in silence. Sukuna pretends to read something on his screen, but you can feel his eyes flicking to you every so often, assessing. You try not to think about it. Itâs quiet for a moment, and thenâ
"You formatted this wrong," he says. Your head snaps up. "What?" Sukuna tilts his screen toward you, pointing lazily at a section of your document. "The citation. APA, not MLA, genius." You stare at him, brows knitting together. "Why the hell do you know that?" Sukuna shrugs, leaning back in his chair. "What, you think you're the only one with a functioning brain?"
"Functioning is a strong word," you mutter, fixing the citation. He snorts, but then, because heâs him, he adds, âI mean, makes sense youâd fuck that up. You look half-dead.â Your eye twitches. "And you look like a walking midlife crisis, but you don't hear me pointing it out every two seconds." Sukuna grins, sharp and unrepentant. âLiar. You know I look good.â
âUgly.â
âSexy.â
"Say that again and I'll stab you with my pen."Â
Itâs late by the time you finally close your laptop, rubbing at your temples. The day has dragged on forever, and the last thing you want is to keep dealing with him. You shove your things into your bag, ready to leave, when Sukunaâstill leaned back in his chair, still looking infuriatingly relaxedâsays, "Tch. Whatever. Weâll just meet here next time." You pause. Blink at him. "Huh?" He doesnât look at you when he says it, like this entire conversation is so beneath him. "The hell, are you deaf? I said weâll just meet here next time. Less walking." You stare, uncertain of what to make of that. Of him saying anything at all.
Thenâ
"Uh. Okay," you mumble. Sukuna snorts, pushing himself up from his chair, rolling his shoulders like this entire night has been a mild inconvenience to him and nothing more. âTry not to die of exhaustion before then.â
You flip him off.
He grins.
â
The dorm study lounge in your building isnât anything specialâjust a couple of couches, a cluster of wobbly desks, and chairs that groan when anyone shifts. But itâs quiet, itâs close, and more importantly, itâs not the goddamn East Wing library. Youâre already seated with your laptop open when Sukuna strolls in like he owns the place, hoodie thrown over his shoulder, compression shirt clinging to him in that casually smug way that makes you want to set your notebook on fire.
âDamn. You live like this?â he says instead of greeting, glancing around at the peeling posters and flickering overhead light.
âYouâve been here three times now,â you mutter, not looking up. âGet over it.â To your surprise, he actually sits down and opens his laptop. No dramatic sighs, no drawn-out complaints. Just pulls up the shared doc and starts typing. You side-eye him suspiciously. âWait. Youâre actually doing work?â
Sukuna doesnât even look at you. âTold you Iâm not completely useless.â
âYou literally did none of the intro. Or the background research. Or theââ
He turns slightly, eyes narrowed. âJesus. You want me to write your acknowledgements too?â
You roll your eyes and keep typing, but you canât help the way your gaze flicks back to his screen every so often. Heâs doing it. Slowly, a little messily, but heâs actually doing the work. You hate how thatâs kind of impressive. The door creaks open an hour in and Toji saunters in with a protein bar in one hand and Choso trailing behind him, hoodie half-on like he got distracted putting it on. âYo,â Toji says, tossing himself onto the arm of your chair like thereâs no concept of personal space. âThis where the grindâs happening?âÂ
Choso raises a brow at Sukuna. âDidnât think you actually meant it when you said you were working on your project.â Sukuna scoffs, not even looking up from the screen. âDonât start.â They pull up chairs, half-invited, half-ignored. Somehow, you end up the only person who seems to be actually working while the other three devolve into semi-productive chaos. Eventually, the conversation driftsâlike it always does when boys are left alone with too much time and not enough supervision.
âYo, did you see that blonde on the cheer squad last game?â Toji starts, popping open a protein bar like itâs part of the ritual. âThe one with the ribbon thing in her hair. Face card was solid.â Choso smirks, still half-focused on his phone. âI think she followed me on Insta. Or her friend did. Canât tellâcheer girls got that same face filter thing going on.â
You hum under your breath, noncommittal. Youâve learned how to tune this out. Let the background noise of testosterone and ego bounce off while you focus on your screen. But thenâ
Choso glances up, flicking his gaze between you and Sukuna like heâs just had a thought worth sharing. âActually⌠Sukunaâs got the best deal out of all of us.â You pause your typing. Slightly. Toji quirks a brow. âHow you figure?â
âHe gets to sit across from her every day,â Choso says casually, jerking his chin in your direction. âDudeâs been staring at that face for what, like a week straight?â Your head snaps up. âExcuse me?â
Choso lifts both hands in mock surrender. âJust saying. When youâre not chewing him out, youâre actually kindaââ
He doesnât finish the sentence. Just gives a slow, meaningfully raised brow like the conclusion is obvious. Toji lets out a low whistle, the corner of his mouth twitching. âNo, waitâheâs right. Youâve got that whole mean girl, academic weapon, doesnât-look-up-in-lectures thing going on.â You just blink at them, caught somewhere between wanting to melt into your chair or hurl your laptop at both their heads. Sukuna, up until now half-listening while scrolling on his screen, exhales like this whole conversation is beneath him. âShut the fuck up.â His voice is flat. Lazy. Like he's bored with their entire existence. But his eyes flick upâand linger on you just a beat too long. Thereâs no smirk. No wink. Just that unreadable look again. Heavy-lidded. Slightly narrowed.
Toji raises a brow. âStruck a nerve?â Choso glances between you and Sukuna, curious now. âDamn. Didnât know you were the territorial type.â Sukuna doesnât even rise to it. Just drags a hand through his hair and mutters, âYou idiots hear yourselves talk?â That seems to be enough. Toji snorts and mutters a half-apology under his breath. âAlright, alright. Chill.â
Choso shrugs. âSheâs still bad though. No take-backs.â You clear your throat and mutter, âThanks⌠I guess?â
No one hears it except Sukuna, whose gaze shifts back to his laptopâbut his ears are slightly pink now. Not that heâd admit it. And just like that, the boys forget they ever had a filter. Theyâre back to talking about the football coach and some frat party coming up next weekend. You, meanwhile, keep your eyes glued to your screenâbut your skin feels hotter, like that look Sukuna gave you never quite left. You try to refocus on your screen, but your heartâs still thudding in your chest in a way you hate. You donât want to be flustered. Especially not over Sukuna, who has the emotional depth of a spoon. Still, when the session winds down and Toji and Choso finally get bored and wander off, Sukuna leans back and says, with the same bored tone he uses when talking about the weather, âIâll see you here again next week. Iâll finish up some of the work at my place before I come, so we donât hafta sit here on our asses long enough for these idiots to show up again.â
You blink. âUh⌠okay.â He doesnât wait for a response. Just slings his bag over his shoulder, walks off like he hasnât just stunned you into silence with the barest sliver of consideration, and mutters under his breath on the way out:
âBetter chairs anyway.â You stare after him. Annoyed. Confused. Unsettled. Slightly amused. And a little less sure about how much of a dick he really is.
â
Itâs been three weeks since you started meeting in the dorm buildingâs study lounge. The sessions are no less exhausting, but theyâve become⌠bearable. You still argue. Heâs still insufferable. But Sukuna actually does the work now. Not without the occasional passive-aggressive comment or that maddening little smirk when he catches you getting flustered. But he contributes. Sometimes he even takes initiativeâlike today, when you arrived and found heâd already opened the shared doc and annotated the latest journal article. Miracles, apparently, do happen.
You're both seated on opposite sides of the same table, a precarious peace holding between the clack of your keys and the scratch of his pen against paper. Sukuna's in a black hoodieâwhich really emphasises how broad his shoulders areâpaired with some low-slung sweatpants. Heâs got one leg up on the chair, knee almost brushing the tableâs underside, completely manspreaded in a way that takes up far more space than necessary. Typical. Youâve tuned it all out. Almost. The only sound in the lounge is the soft hum of the vending machine and the low rustle of paper. That is, until your phone buzzes.
You glance down.
[8:37 PM] Yuna:
pls tell me ur free next friday night frat party at Theta house i need a plus one u owe meee
You pause. Theta house. The name sparks something in your brainâa half-formed association, faint and unimportant until now. Youâve heard it muttered in passing, caught glimpses of its parties plastered all over peopleâs Instagram stories. Flashy. Loud. Too many red solo cups and too little self-respect. But more importantly: it rings a specific bell. Something familiar. Your eyes flicker back to the message on your screen, rereading Yunaâs plea. Your brows furrow. You bite the inside of your cheek, lips tugging downward as you try to decide if this is worth the impending social fatigue, or if you can just ghost her and fake a fever. Maybe a paper cut. Across the table, the scratch of pen on paper falters. You donât even notice until Sukunaâs voice cuts in, sharp and dry.Â
âWhatâre you making that face for?â he asks without looking up. Flat, disinterested, like your expression is an inconvenience. You blink, mildly startled. â...What face?â
âThat weird one.â He finally lifts his head, narrowing his eyes at you with vague irritation. âLike you just found out you forgot to pay your car registration or somethinâ.â Your mouth opens, closes. âItâs just a text,â you say eventually, letting out a quiet sigh as you flip your phone facedown. âMy friendâs dragging me to a frat party next week. She needs a plus-one.â At that, Sukuna stills. Not dramatically. Just... a subtle pause. His elbow stops bouncing. His pen hovers above the page.
âWhat frat?â he asks. The question is casual, but his gaze sharpens ever so slightly. You hesitate. ââŚTheta house. I think.â
He snorts. Loud and unmistakable. âThatâs mine.âÂ
Your head snaps up. âWhat?â
He leans back lazily, one arm thrown over the back of the chair, looking maddeningly relaxed. âTheta. Thatâs my frat. Toji, mine and Choâs. Didnât ya know? They were talkinâ about it before.â You blink, momentarily at a loss. The realization hits with a muted thudâof course. It all makes sense now. The flashy parties, the obnoxiously loud music every other weekend, the guys who walk around campus with too much cologne and too few responsibilities. Of course he lives there.
âOh,â you say finally. It hangs thereâawkward, brittle, like a glass ornament someone forgot to put away after Christmas. You both look back down at your notes, pretending the moment never happened. You reread the same sentence in your textbook three times and still canât register what it says. The silence isnât exactly uncomfortable, but it isnât comfortable either. Just... weird. Like thereâs something in the air that neither of you wants to acknowledge. Then, after a minute, Sukuna exhales slowly and leans further back in his seat.
âYou should swing by,â he says offhandedly. So casual it sounds like a throwaway line.
You glance up. âHuh?â
âThe party,â he says, eyes flicking briefly toward you, then back to the ceiling. âYour friendâs already going. Might as well.â You study him. His expression is unreadableâcalm, indifferent. No trace of smugness, no expectation behind the offer. Itâs almost too nonchalant. Like he wouldnât care either way. You narrow your eyes a little. âAre you⌠inviting me?â
He shrugs. âYouâre not special. Iâm inviting everyone.â Your lips twitch at that, but you donât call him out. âRight. Of course.â
Still, you hear your voice soften slightly.Â
âIâll think about it.â
Sukuna hums in response, eyes drifting downwardâright to your hoodie, baggy enough to cover you from neck to knee, sleeves tugged over your hands. You can practically see the judgment forming. âJust donât show up dressed like this,â he mutters, the corner of his mouth twitching. You snort before you can stop yourself. A short, surprised laugh bursts out of you. âSeriously?â
He gives you a deadpan look. âItâs a party, not a cult meeting.â You raise your brows, amused. âClearly, you donât know me at all if you think I dress like this everywhere.â Sukuna tilts his head, studying you like you just issued a challenge. âSo you do have real clothes.â
âIâm a woman of mystery,â you say smugly, folding your arms. âYou donât get to know.â A rare smirk twitches onto his faceâbrief, dry, almost like heâs trying not to be amused. âThat sounds like a yes.â You roll your eyes, grabbing your highlighter again. âFocus on organic chemistry, casanova.â
He chuckles under his breath but doesnât argue, returning to his notes. The mood shifts againâeasy now, fluid in a way you didnât expect. The banter lingers, like a residue in the air, and for once, you donât feel like youâre dodging landmines when you speak. You work in silence for a while longer, but itâs not the same brittle quiet from before. Itâs something softer. Settled. And maybeâfor just a secondâit doesnât feel like youâre enemies anymore. Not friends, either. But not enemies. When you finally pack up for the night, Sukuna doesnât say anything. He just slings his bag over his shoulder, glances at you once, then jerks his chin toward the door like letâs go. You fall into step beside him, not speaking, the click of the lounge door swinging shut behind you. You donât even know how it happened. How somehow he waited for you by the staircase that led up to your dorms before departing back to where he lived. The hallway is quiet. The air, cool and crisp, smells faintly of late-night ramen and floor cleaner. You say nothing. But somehow, that moment stretches longer than it should. And it stays with you. All the way back to your dorm.
â
âYuâ I donât know,â you say, pulling at one of the spaghetti straps of your top and glancing at your reflection in her full-length mirror, âI like wearing shit like this but⌠donât you think itâs too much for a frat party?â Your voice comes out unsure, tinged with that all-too-familiar pre-party doubt that creeps in five minutes before youâre supposed to leave. Youâre still adjusting the fabric over your chestâthis stupid, tiny top that clings a little too perfectly to your figure, exposing just enough skin to make you question if youâll even make it through the front door without second-guessing everything. The bra underneath? Completely unintentional. You didnât even mean to match itâhad just grabbed something clean and vaguely push-up-ish from the drawer, but of course, it had to be your most expensive set. Lacy, pink, and not remotely subtle. Victoriaâs Secret, you realize with mild betrayal, had made your boobs look criminally good. Like, pause-a-manâs-conversation good.
The top itself wasnât the issueâit was cropped, sure, but cute. Flimsy fabric and soft color, something you could probably dress down if you were pairing it with anything other than this damn skirt. The skirt was what had you feeling like you were in over your head. And it wasnât even yours. It was Yunaâs. A distressed, light-wash denim mini that was practically a belt. It hugged every curve, curved a little more than you were used to, and sat low enough on your hips to make you feel a tiny bit scandalous with every breath. If you shifted too fast, it felt like itâd ride up and expose everything. And with the panties that came with your VS setâthin, lacy, and technically classified as lingerieâyou felt dangerously close to flashing someone if the wind so much as thought about picking up.
âI look like Iâm trying to seduce someoneâs dad,â you mutter.
âOh my god,â Yuna gasps from behind you, eyes wide as she stops in her tracks. âYou look so fucking hot. Iâm not hearing any complaints about this.â She spins you around, hands on your shoulders as she takes in the full outfit like sheâs styling you for a Vogue shoot. Her perfectly manicured fingers trail to the hem of your skirt, and with a gleam in her eye, she gives your butt a dramatic, playful slap.
You glare at her. âCan you not grope me right now?â
âSorry,â she says, completely unapologetic. âYou just look so good. Like, painfully good. Likeââoops, I just made that guy trip over a keg because I walked byâ good.â You attempt to give her your best unimpressed stare, but itâs hard to hold when she looks that excitedâand especially when sheâs standing there in a sparkly, strapless top thatâs practically glued to her skin and a skirt shorter than yours. Not to mention the rhinestone eyeliner and lip gloss she reapplied twice already. You sigh, defeated, because if she looked hot, and you looked hot, maybe it wasnât the worst idea to just embrace it.
âUgh, okay, fine,â you mutter. âYou look sexy too.â
âSo do you,â she grins, squeezing your wrist before spinning toward the mirror to grab her purse. âWeâre gonna be the baddest bitches there.â
You snort. âThatâs not exactly a high bar. I saw someone show up to one of these in a Pikachu onesie.â
âExactly,â she says, throwing a jacket over her shoulder. âWeâll be legends by comparison.â Despite yourself, you laughâand when you turn back to the mirror, something about the reflection feels less terrifying than it did five minutes ago. The outfit was bold, sure. But with Yuna beside you, her energy electric and effortless, you could feel yourself slipping into that mindset, too. The one where you were allowed to be hot without apologizing for it. You slip on your shoes, grab your phone, and follow Yuna out of the dorm. The hallwayâs quiet, dimly lit with that weird yellow lighting all college buildings have after 10 PM. You both walk down to the street where your Uber is already waiting, music faintly thumping from the frat row just a few blocks away. And for once, youâre not dreading it. Youâre a little nervous, maybe. But with your favorite person beside you, in outfits that could start wars, heading into a night with no plans other than chaosâyouâre ready.
The Uber ride is a blur of Yunaâs makeup touch-ups, last-minute accessory debates, and Spotify blaring a throwback remix that has both of you scream-singing the chorus. The nerves in your stomach ease up a little more with each passing minute. Maybe itâs the way Yuna keeps hyping you up or how good the outfit actually looks under the glow of the passing streetlightsâbut by the time the car pulls up in front of Theta house, youâre no longer on the verge of changing outfits or ghosting the night entirely. The frat house looms ahead like every other frat house youâve ever seenâloud music already spilling out from the open door, string lights tangled across the porch, people clustered out front with red cups in hand like itâs a high school movie come to life. You can hear someone whoop as a beer pong shot lands across the front lawn, and someone else yells âTake it off!â from an upstairs window.Â
Yunaâs eyes sparkle. âHome sweet home,â she says, linking her arm through yours. Inside, itâs chaoticâbut weirdly cozy. Warm. The air smells like cheap beer, cologne, and weed, the floors already sticky under your heels. Thereâs a crowd around the living room-turned-dance-floor, another bottlenecking at the kitchen where a keg is set up beside a counter full of jungle juice and liquor. You spot a couple of people you vaguely know from class or mutuals through Yunaâmost of them already tipsy, greeting her with hugs and loud compliments. Someone hands you a drink you donât ask for, and you take it anyway, sipping something vaguely fruity and deceptively strong. The thrum of music settles in your chest, rattling the floorboards beneath your feet, and for the first time in weeksâmaybe even monthsâyou feel something close to relaxed. Youâre halfway to the kitchen to grab a chaser when it happens.
You turn a corner and bump into someoneâshoulder to chest. Solid. Firm. Tall enough that you instinctively glance up before you even register who it is.
Sukuna. He looks down at you, expression unreadable for a momentâuntil his eyes very obviously drop from your face to the low neckline of your top. And linger. Thereâs the barest flicker of somethingâsurprise? amusement?âin his eyes, but itâs gone too fast to confirm. You step back, blinking. âOh my god. You are so weird.â
He lifts a brow. âExcuse me?â
âYouâre literally checking me out like Iâm a Victoriaâs Secret window display,â you deadpan, tugging your top slightly higherânot that it helps much.
âYou wore that and expected no one to look?â he says, voice dry and annoyingly smooth. His eyes flick lazily down again. âAlso, hate to break it to you, but your braâs doing a lot of heavy lifting right now.â
You scoff. âYouâre actually such a freak.â He shrugs, tilting the water bottle in his hand toward you. âNot denying it.â Youâre about to roll your eyes and walk away, but then he says itâso nonchalantly it barely registers at first.
âYou look nice, though.â
You freeze mid-step.
ââŚWhat?â
His mouth quirks up slightly, like he didnât just toss a grenade into the conversation. âYou heard me.âÂ
You stare at him, trying to gauge if heâs mocking you. But thereâs no smug grin, no teasing lilt. Just that lazy drawl, that unreadable expression that always keeps you guessing. You fold your arms, shifting your weight to one hip. âWell,â you say slowly, âclearly you donât know what to do when Iâm not wearing my usual two layers of oversized fabric.â
Sukuna snorts. âThought you were gonna roll up in your campus hoodie again. Kind of a shame, actually. I miss how it swallowed your whole body. You looked like a walking laundry pile.â
âWow,â you deadpan. âThatâs the nicest thing anyoneâs ever said to me.â
âI try.â
You take a slow sip from your drink, hiding the small grin tugging at your lips. âSo this is what youâre like when youâre not being the biggest dick on the planet.â
âIâm not the biggest dick, although Iâd say I have the biggest dickâ he retorts with a snicker. âYouâre just distracting now.â
You blink. âDistracting?â
He shrugs again, way too casual about the whole thing. âYou look good. Iâm not blind.â You glance around to make sure no oneâs listening, then mutter, âYouâre way more tolerable when thereâs alcohol involved.â
âYeah?â He raises an eyebrow. âYouâre way more tolerable when youâre not scowling at me for breathing too loud.â You glare. âThat happened once.â
âIt happened twice.â
âOnce,â you insist.
He just smirks and takes a sip from the water bottle in his hands. His gaze flicks past you, toward the hallway, and he jerks his chin slightly. âCome on. Iâll introduce you to some people who wonât talk about your bra.â You narrow your eyes. âIs that your idea of an apology?â
He smirks again, already walking off. âTake it or leave it.â You roll your eyes and followâonly because your drinkâs almost empty and the kitchenâs in that direction anyway. Obviously. And maybeâjust maybeâbecause being around him like this, when heâs not being a complete jackass, isnât the worst thing in the world. At least not tonight. Sukuna leads you through the crowd like heâs done this a million times beforeâwhich he probably has. You catch a couple of people eyeing him as he walks by, and you wonder if itâs because heâs hot or because he radiates that unapproachable energy like itâs cologne.
âThis isâŚ?â someone asks when you both approach a small group gathered around a tall keg table. He jerks a thumb toward you lazily. âMy chem partner.â You resist the urge to roll your eyes at the title. âHi,â you say instead, a little wave as you flash a quick grin.
âYo, youâre in Shimizuâs class too? That womanâs a menace.â
âTell me about it,â you groan. âI swear she adds extra steps to procedures just for fun.â Someone laughs. âYou actually talk to her? I just fake nod through half of her lectures.â You slip into conversation easily after that, bouncing off the group's energy. Youâve always been extroverted when youâre comfortable, and itâs oddly easy here, surrounded by strangers who are just buzzed enough to be nice. Itâs even easier when you catch Sukuna watching the group banter from a short distance, sipping from his water bottle again, his expression unreadable. You break away to get another drink, winding toward the makeshift bar on the patio. The music's loud, the air sticky with alcohol and cologne, and just as you reach for a clean cup, a shoulder brushes into yours.
âShitââ
You turn, and there he is again. Ryomen Sukuna. Up close this time. âJesus, what is your problem?â you mutter, looking up at him. âDo you teleport?â He looks unfazed. âYou walked into me.â
You snort. âYou walked into me.â
He doesnât argue. Just leans slightly back and lets his eyes flick down, over your outfit, andâyep. Not subtle. Not even trying to be. Your eyes narrow.Â
âYouâre such a creep. I donât care if Iâm slightly drunk, I can definitely tell youâre staring at my boobs.â He scoffs, openly amused. âWell, sorry. Iâm a man. And those are practically fighting for their lives in that top.â You gasp, smacking his arm. âYouâre disgusting.â
He shrugs. âAnd youâre the one who wore it. Donât act surprised people are looking.â You roll your eyes but the corner of your mouth twitches. âWhatever. At least I can pull it off.â
âWho said you couldnât?â
You pause for half a second too long. Then you glare. âYouâre pissing me off.â
âAnd youâre drunk,â he retorts, smirking.
âIâm not drunk yet. Youâd know if I was drunk.â
âOh?â He raises a brow. âWhat, do you start crying or something?â
âNo,â you scoff. âI just get⌠more honest.â
âTerrifying.â You give him a sweet smile thatâs anything but. âWhat, afraid Iâll hurt your little ego?â He looks down at youâreally looks. Like he's taking in the pink flush in your cheeks, the glint in your eye, the way you don't back down even when heâs standing so damn close.
âNah,â he says. âMy egoâs huge.â
You blink. â...Thatâs not as reassuring as you think it is.â
He laughs, low and dry, then tilts his bottle at you in mock cheers before walking off again. You stand there for a moment, a little dazed, before grabbing another drink. Eventually, a while later, you find your way back to Yuna, whoâs already three sips away from shouting compliments at strangers. She gasps when she sees you. âBabe. Baby girl. My precious. Did I just see you with Sukuna?â
You blink. âYeah, why?â
âYou know him?â
âWeâre in the same chem class,â you mutter, sipping your drink. âGroup project.â Yuna grabs your arm. âAnd you didnât say anything?â You eye her suspiciously. âSay what?â
âThat heâs literally the hottest man on this campus?!â You make a face. âHeâs not that hot.â Yuna gives you a look like sheâs been personally offended. âYouâre lying to yourself. Also, you two have like, that weird tension. Itâs kind of hot.â
You groan. âYunaââ
âJust fuck him.â
âWhat is wrong with you?â
She only cackles in response before she gets whisked away by a guy whoâs clearly her on-again-off-again situationship. She doesnât even look guilty as she leans in to whisper something to him. A few minutes later, you get the text.
sorry i love u but iâm gonna go with him ok iâll send u money for an uber ily donât die xx
You stare at the message, swaying slightly on your stool. The room blurs a little when you blink. You swipe over to the Uber app. Try to log in. Error. Try again. Error. The third time your phone crashes entirely and you groan, bracing your elbow on the edge of the bar counter and burying your face in your hand. Your heels are starting to hurt and you can already feel tomorrowâs hangover tap dancing in your brain.
âYou good?â
You lift your head slowly. And of course. Of course. Itâs Sukuna again. Leaning one arm against the edge of the bar like heâs been summoned by your suffering. âYouâre like a cockroach,â you mutter. âYou just keep showing up.â
He grins lazily. âStill here?â
âYeah, unfortunately. My friend ditched me and my Uber appâs being a little bitch.â He hums, gaze flicking over your glazed expression, your flushed cheeks. âYou look like youâre about to pass out.â
âI might,â you admit. âIf I donât cry first.âÂ
Thereâs a beat of silence before he says, âIâll drop you off.â You blink. âWhat? No. Youâve been drinking.â
âI havenât. Canât have everyone in the frat house drunk. Someoneâs gotta babysit these idiots.â You blink again, the lag in your brain buffering like bad Wi-Fi. â...You?â
âYeah, me. Shocking.â
âYou know where I live?â
âYou told me. Last week. After lab.â
You squint at him. âI donât remember that.â
âYeah, well, I remember everything.â
âEw.â
He just stares at you, expectant, one brow cocked like heâs got all the time in the world.
You exhale dramatically. âFine. But if you kill me Iâm haunting your frat house.â
âI welcome it. Itâs been boring lately.â
âFreak.âÂ
He smirks and plucks your phone straight from your hands to toss it into your purse, ignoring the half-hearted slap you aim at his wrist.
âCome on.â You groan, dragging yourself off the barstool, your legs not cooperating in the slightest. Your heels were cute in theoryâsilver with a tiny bow on the back and barely any support. Very much not made for trudging across dark college lawns and cracked sidewalks. You follow him out, still kind of mad at the universe for letting your Uber app crash. He opens the door like it's nothing, like heâs a gentleman or somethingâgrossâand the cold night air wraps around your skin instantly. As it does, you swear you hear him mutter something. You turn, squinting through the haze. âWhat?â
âNothing.â But it wasnât nothing. It was something. And you're drunk, but not that drunk. It sounded suspiciously like you look pretty tonight. But you donât say anything, just frown and follow him out into the night. Until you realize heâs not heading toward the street. Heâs heading toward the back lot. Behind the frat house.Â
You pause. âWaitâwhere the hell is your car?â
âOther side,â he says, without slowing.
âWhat do you mean other side?â
âI live here, dumbass. The resident lot is across the quad.â
âAre you kidding me?â You groan. âMy feet are going to fall off.â
âShouldnâtâve worn stripper heels.â
âShouldnâtâve been born with a stick up your ass.â He snorts, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his hoodie as he walks ahead of you, like he's not dealing with a barely coherent girl in a miniskirt and heels struggling to walk in a straight line. You try to keep up, but the lawn dips, uneven and soft, and your ankle rolls slightly to the side. Your foot catches. Your knee gives out. And suddenly youâre stumbling, arms flailing, balance goneâYou land hard on your ass with a sharp oof.
âFUCK,â you hiss, grabbing your ankle, already feeling the sting. You stay there a second, stewing, overwhelmed and overstimulatedâthe lights from the party still flickering behind your eyelids, your chest heaving from the sudden jolt, your mouth dry and head spinning. âYou good?â Sukunaâs voice comes from somewhere above you, way too calm for someone whose lab partner just ate shit in front of him. âNo, Iâm not fucking good,â you snap, scowling up at him. âMy feet are bleeding, my brain is melting, and your car is apparently in Narnia.â
âYouâre so dramatic.â
âYouâre such a dick!â
âJesus Christ,â he mutters, suddenly stepping closer. âJustâfuck it.â You barely register him moving before thereâs a sudden shift in gravity and your world tips sideways.
He scoops you up like itâs nothing.
Bridal style.
Your arms instinctively hook around his neck as you squeak, instinctively clinging to his hoodie as your legs leave the ground. âWhat the fuck are you doing?!â you yell, even though your voice comes out way too breathless to be convincing.
âCarrying you. Because youâre useless.â
âPut me down!â
âNo.â
Your mouth opens to protest again, but your brain short-circuits becauseâ
His hand. One of themâlarge, warm, callousedâis curled under your thighs, gripping firmly but not rough, fingers splayed slightly against the bare skin between your skirt and where your panties ride up your ass. But itâs the other hand that breaks your brain. Itâs pressed right beneath your chest, right where the thin fabric of your top clings to your ribs. His knuckles graze the underside of your boob with each step. Not on purpose. Probably. Hopefully. But your body registers every tiny movement, every bounce and shift. Your breath stutters, nipples tightening under the lace, andâ
God, you need to shut your brain off. He smells like expensive cologne and weed and something darkerâmusk and leather and sweat. The hoodie under your palm is worn soft, like he's had it for years, and his chest is so warm against your arm itâs making you feel dizzy. You go quiet. Not because you want to, but because your mouth wonât work right. He notices. âWhat, no snarky comment? Are you dying?â
âJust⌠conserving energy,â you mumble, trying to ignore the way your head is now resting against his shoulder, half from exhaustion, half because it feels nice there.Â
âShame. I was enjoying the sound of you bitching.â He makes it to his carâa black â09 Civic parked in the furthest back rowâand sets you down gently, like you're glass. Which somehow feels even more ridiculous than being carried. You try to get your balance again, but before you can even reach down, he crouches and grabs your ankle.
âHeyâwhat are youââ
Heâs already unbuckling your heel. âYour feet are bleeding,â he mutters, slipping it off carefully. Then the other. âWhy are girls like this?â
âBecause we suffer for fashion,â you reply, watching as he sets them neatly in the footwell of the passenger side. âIdiots,â he mutters, straightening and helping you into the seat. The door is still open as he leans in and buckles you up, the seatbelt snapping into place just under your chest.
âDonât look at my tits,â you mumble, half-asleep, half-defensive.
âIâm not looking.â
âYou are. Youâve been staring all night, you absolute perv. I might be drunk but Iâm not blind.â He sighs, shuts the door, walks around to the driverâs side, and slides in beside you. The carâs interior is cool and clean and smells like the same cologne thatâs still clinging to him. Once the engineâs on and the headlights glow, he glances over at you.
âSorry Iâm a man. My bad.â
âYou are bad. And thatâs not an excuse.â
âAnd yet here you are,â he drawls, pulling out of the lot, his hand casual on the wheel, the other resting lazily on the gear shift. His thighs spread slightly as he adjusts, and you donât mean to look butâ
Yeah. No. Youâre drunk. Because thereâs no way youâre checking out his hands or his stupid muscular legs or the way his jaw clenches every time he shifts gears. Absolutely no way. You fold your arms and press your forehead against the window, trying to cool your cheeks down, but it doesnât work. The drive is short. He doesnât play music. Just lets the silence sit, and somehow itâs not awkward. Just⌠quiet. Kinda warm. When he pulls up in front of your dorm, he doesnât speak right away. Just sits there for a second. You turn to him slowly. âThanks⌠for not letting me pass out in a bush or get murdered.â
He shrugs. âWouldâve ruined my grade if you died.âÂ
You scoff. âSo romantic.â
A pause. His eyes flick to yours, and his voice drops just a bit.
âYouâre welcome.âÂ
And you donât know why, but that makes your stomach flip a little. You nod, mumble something incoherent, and go to open the door. But he stops you, reaching across you suddenly to grab your purse from the floor. His arm brushes your chest again and you freeze. He pretends not to notice. But the corner of his mouth twitches. He hands you your bag without a word, and you climb out, the night air immediately biting your skin. As you shut the door and start toward your building, you hear his voice behind youâlow, amused, maybe even a little genuine.
âGet home safe, dumbass.â
You turn over your shoulder.
âNight, perv.â Then you're gone. And his car stays parked for a few more seconds than it needs to.
â
It starts slow. Just like always, you two keep meeting up for study sessions, mostly in the same tucked-away campus library room. And technically youâre still working on your project. There's still the usual back-and-forth, the occasional threat of flinging a pen at his head, and your ever-reliable "God, you're so annoying" whenever he pushes too far. But something's changed. Some invisible shift. Like the night of the frat party cracked something open. You still bicker, still throw jabs like it's oxygen, but nowâ
Thereâs laughter. Actual laughter. From you. And snickering from him, like heâs low-key delighted when you call him a dickhead with that little smile twitching at the corner of your mouth. Now he leans closer than necessary when youâre reading. His arm brushes yours and he doesnât move. His eyes linger on your mouth when you talk and when you call him on it, he just shrugs and says, âSorry, your lip gloss is distracting.â You throw your pen at his forehead. He catches it without looking. You start referring to the group project as our child, and he calls himself the hot absentee father. You start keeping a tally of how many times he sighs dramatically when he doesn't get the answer before you. He keeps a separate one of how many times you chew your pen cap when youâre stressed and says itâs âborderline erotic.â
âI will murder you,â you say sweetly.
"That's what makes it erotic," he replies. But itâs not just that. Thereâs more. Quieter things. One time, he walks in late with two iced coffees and just drops one in front of you without a word, like itâs normal now. (It becomes normal. He starts bringing snacks too. Sometimes even the weird granola bars you said once in passing that you liked.) When youâre tired, he starts reading sections aloud to you in a voice that's somehow both mocking and comforting. When you're scribbling notes and your pen runs out, he's already tossing you a spare. And eventuallyâ
You exchange numbers.
Itâs just for âconvenience,â you both claim. So you can update each other on meeting times. So he can send you stupid memes related to your topic. So you can text him "you forgot the rubric again, dumbass" when he shows up with nothing but a Monster and the same black hoodie heâs worn four sessions in a row. You never call each other, of course. Not yet. But the texts get more frequent. More casual. Sometimes youâre not even talking about the project. Sometimes itâs just:
You: tell toji to stop calling me your lil nerd wife Sukuna: donât flatter urself. he called u my leashYou: even worse?? Sukuna: not to me đ
And one day, you're the first to arrive. Youâre early, even. Kinda excited to see him, which you don't interrogate too hard because you're a busy girl with academic priorities and definitely not thinking about his stupid shoulders lately. So you sit. And wait. Ten minutes pass. Then fifteen. Finally, you send a text.
You: where u at bruh wtf im already here
Thereâs a delay. Then your phone buzzes. Itâs a photo. A mirror selfie. Gym bathroom. Fluorescent lighting. Heâs shirtlessâno, wait, technically his shirt is in his mouth, bitten between his teeth. His abs are cut like they were designed in a lab. Thereâs a sheen of sweat on his chest, and the pinkest hint of a happy trail disappearing into black shorts. And godâ the tattoos that intricately line his hips, and youâre ashamed that youâre zooming in to see them a bit more clearly. Tojiâs in the background throwing up a peace sign and smirking like a menace. And the caption?
Sukuna: gym
You stare at your screen like it personally offended you. Because okay. Fine. You tolerate him now. You maybe even like him a little. Like, as a person. As in, you donât fantasize about choking him out every time he opens his mouth. Thatâs progress. But nothingânothingâcould have prepared you for the way your stomach plummets at that photo.
Itâs shameful, really. Youâre sitting alone in the study room, already annoyed that heâs late, your phone clenched in one hand and your cold coffee sweating on the table. You only texted him out of impatience, fully expecting some lame excuse. And instead, you get that. His abs are right there. Cut. Sharp. Obscene. His happy trail is a faint pink stripe leading down, dusted just enough to make your thighs clench, and you hate yourself for it. Your face heats so fast you think you might spontaneously combust. You look around the room like someone else might have seen it, like that would somehow make this a shared crime and not just your own private downfall. You blink at the photo. Then again. Then you lock your phone. Then unlock it.
You type.
Delete.
Type again.
Backspace halfway. Then finally give in and hit send.
You: keep those freaky selfies to urself bro Sukuna: u sure? u stared at that one a little too long You: YOU CANT SEE ME Sukuna: can feel it tho You: ew Sukuna: ur welcome
You throw your phone face down on the table like it just slapped you. He shows up twenty minutes later. Hair still damp, gym bag slung over one shoulder, hoodie half on, clinging to the edge of his frame like it was trying to slide off. Thereâs still that smug grin curling on his lips like he knows exactly what heâs doing. You donât even say hi. You just cross your arms and raise your brows as he strolls in like he owns the place.
âI said keep the thirst traps to yourself, gym rat.â
He collapses into the chair next to you, legs spread way too wide, stretching his arms back behind his head with a low groan like heâs been working so hardâand the motion tugs his hoodie just enough for you to catch a flash of skin. A line of muscle. That stupid V again. âThirst trap?â he echoes, voice low and lazy. âNah. That was community service.â
You make a show of rolling your eyes, flipping a page in your notes. âYouâre disgusting.â He leans over, chin propped in his hand, eyes glittering with something sharp and amused. âCâmon,â he says, his voice dropping, thick and playful, âyouâre telling me you didnât like it?â You donât answer. He grins like thatâs an answer. Then, slow and deliberate, he leans back againâslouches down in the chair like he owns it, hands behind his head, and lets his hoodie inch up. Not a lot. Just enough. Enough to show the ridges of his abs. The line of his hipbones. The tattoos. The happy trail, pink and soft and infuriating, peeking above the waistband of his shorts like he planned this entire thing. Like this is a setup and you walked into it willingly. âSure about that?â he murmurs, eyes heavy-lidded and watching you now. You make a strangled sound in your throat and smack a folder in front of your face.
âYou are so weird,â you mutter from behind it. He laughs. Real, deep, warm. And you hate the way it makes something loosen in your chest. And it keeps happeningâthese strange, flirty little moments you donât know how to explain. He starts texting you just to annoy you. You start sending him selfies of your weird coffee orders with captions like for our child (the project). He calls you baby mama when you least expect it and winks every time you make eye contact. And maybe the worst part?
You start dressing better. Not for him, obviously. Thatâd be dumb. Itâs just⌠youâre a girl. Sometimes you want to look cute. Sometimes you want to wear something other than an oversized hoodie and leggings. So you start showing up in cropped tops. In fitted shirts. In actual shorts when it's warm out. Sometimes you evenâGod forbidâdo your hair. Not for him, of course. Except... he notices. Youâre bent over your laptop one afternoon when you catch him staring again. Not like heâs trying to be subtle. He leans back in his chair, arms crossed, smirking lazily.
âWhat?â you say, defensive.
âYou look good,â he says, so bluntly it makes you blink. Then, almost offhand: âBut I liked when you wore those weird baggy clothes, too.â You snort. And suddenly the words tumble from your mouth, words you didnât expect to say at all.
âYeah? Didnât you say the project would be easier if I was hot?â
His smirk falters for the first time. He pauses. Thenâquietly, sincerely, and in that very Sukuna wayâhe says, âYeah, well. I lied about that to piss you off. Obviously.âÂ
A beat.
âYouâre touched in the head if you donât think youâre hot.â You go quiet. The air goes weird againâthick and strange and soft around the edges. You blink down at your notes, unsure what to say. Then, like itâs nothing, he shrugs. âAlso⌠sorry. About that. And all the other comments. Shouldnâtâve said that shit.â
You glance at him. Heâs not looking at you. Just fiddling with the ring on his finger like heâs not even sure if he meant to say it out loud. You swallow. Your stomach flips. Something tender and unfamiliar blooms in your chest. Then, because you canât handle the softness, you bump his foot under the table and mumble, âYouâre still annoying.â He grins like heâs won something. You work in silence after thatâyour legs stretched out, your ankles resting comfortably on his lap. He doesnât move them. Just shifts to make space. At one point he starts absently tracing circles on your sock with one finger. And you donât move either. You just let it happen. Because whatever this isâitâs not nothing anymore. Itâs weird and slow and unfolding. Itâs not sharp like it used to be. Itâs soft. Itâs warm.
And you donât know what this thing is. Not yet. But itâs something. Itâs teasing and warm and slow and building. Itâs softer around the edges now. His glances linger longer. His jokes donât always have a bite. He starts giving you the better chair. He moves his laptop so you can stretch your legs out and rest your ankles on his lap like itâs no big deal. He taps your water bottle when you forget to drink. He waits for you after class sometimes now. He starts noticing things. When youâre tired. When youâve skipped lunch. When your legâs bouncing under the table and youâre clearly spiraling about a deadline. He just reaches over and taps your water bottle. âDrink something. You look like youâre about to combust.â
And one day you realizeâ
Youâre not dressing better because you feel like it. Youâre dressing better because something inside you wants him to look at you. Want him to notice. Wants him to sit across from you with his dumb jawline and his pretty mouth and his stupid gaze and look. Like he sees you. And he does. Itâs horrifying. And kind of thrilling. You donât say anything. You just keep showing up. You let your shirts fit a little tighter. Your hair falls a little smoother. You wear that one necklace that always rests right at the tops of your chest. You tell yourself itâs fine. Itâs nothing.
â
The last few weeks of the semester come fast and loud. Finals hang heavy in the air, coffee-fueled library sessions and group study chaos around every corner, but somehow, Sukuna still finds a way to plant himself next to you in every single lecture. Literally. He doesnât even ask anymoreâjust drops into the seat beside you like itâs his birthright. Kicks his legs out wide under the desk, slumps dramatically back in the seat, leans over with that lazy, smug-ass voice to ask if you did the pre-lecture reading (you did, obviously; he did not, obviously). Sometimes he brings snacks. One time, it was gummy worms. Another time, chips he smuggled in the sleeve of his hoodie like a middle schooler. He offered you one and you made a face but still took it. He grinned.Â
Your chem project is basically wrapped up. Youâre in editing and final-presentation mode now, which somehow translates to even more time together. Study sessions have blurred into hangouts, your text convos half-project, half weird jokes and chaotic memes. He still calls you namesâairhead, goblin, menaceâbut sometimes his voice gets soft when he does. He still teases you, but the silences in between stretch warm and easy. So when youâre walking out of a bookstore downtown one Saturday afternoon and spot him across the street, itâs almost normal. Heâs with Toji and Choso, the three of them leaning against a car like theyâre posing for some kind of delinquent calendar. Sukuna clocks you first. His eyes catch on you, and he lifts his hand in a lazy, beckoning wave.
You cross the street.
He smirks. "Didnât know you had business on this side of town. What, you stalking me now?" You roll your eyes. "Relax. I was running errands. Thereâs a stationery shop over there that sells the pens I like."
"Nerd," Choso says, but he sounds kind of fond. Toji just nods like, fair. Sukuna tilts his head. "You taking the bus back?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Itâs getting dark," he says like itâs a passing observation. Then, in that dry, effortless way: "You look like a perfect kidnapping target. All spaced out and clueless. Câmere, little lamb."
You gape. "Okay well youâre the type of person to be the one doing the kidnapping."
"Uh-huh. Get in. Iâll drive you."
Youâre protesting before he even finishes the sentence. But Toji just shrugs, opens the passenger door for you like this is something heâs used to, and Chosoâs already climbing into the back. You sigh and slide in, heart pounding for reasons you refuse to name. The drive starts off easy. After a while, he drops off both Choso and Toji to the gymâ where they were apparently headed for an evening grind session. Spending time with these three makes you think that the gym might be their second home besides the frat house where they live. You lean your head against the window, watching the city pass by in a blur of dusk and brake lights. But traffic hits near campusâan accident or something up aheadâand the car slows to a crawl.
You sigh, long and dramatic, throwing your head back against the seat. âWell. Looks like weâre stuck.â Sukuna shoots you a flat look, one hand tapping the wheel while the other lazily rests across his lap. âIncredible deduction, Sherlock. What gave it away? The line of cars stretching into the abyss?â
You flip him off without looking. âIâm putting on music.â
He sits up a little straighter. âDonât you dare play weird indie-girl shit.â Youâre already unlocking your phone, smug. âToo late.â And then it beginsâthose soft, dreamy guitar chords of She Wonât Go Away, spilling out through the car speakers like a bubble bath in audio form. Sukuna visibly flinches.
âWhat the fuck is this?â he groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. âThis sounds like it belongs in a movie montage of someone getting dumped in the rain.â You grin, curling your legs up into the seat and pressing your temple against the cool glass of the window. âItâs art. Itâs emotion. Itâs currently the only thing keeping me alive during finals.âÂ
Youâre already humming under your breath, voice quiet but matching the lilt of the lyrics like youâve done this a hundred times alone in your room. You donât even notice youâre doing it at firstâjust this soft, distracted singing, like muscle memory. Like breathing. Sukuna groans again, leaning back against his seat like heâs physically in pain. âPut on Playboi Carti like a normal human being.â
âNo,â you reply sweetly, already queuing the song again. âIâm hyper fixated. That means Iâm playing it at least three more times.â
âJesus,â he mutters, but doesnât reach for the aux. Instead, he leans his head back against the headrest and shuts his eyes, as if surrendering to the inevitable. His tattooed arm is draped lazily along the console between you. The setting sun outside paints soft orange lines across the curve of his throat, the ridges of his knuckles, the cut of his jaw. You glance over. Just for a second. His damp pink hair is curling a little where it rests against his forehead, the collar of his shirt a little stretched from where he tugged it off earlier. His hands are relaxed, but youâve seen them clenched around a pen, a steering wheel, a canâso often that itâs weird to see them soft like this.Â
When the chorus hits again, you canât help itâyou clutch your water bottle like itâs a microphone and sing along, full volume, completely tone-deaf. Your voice cracks on a high note. You donât care. The car is stuck, the sun is bleeding out across the horizon, and for once your brain is quiet enough to let you just be. Sukuna cracks an eye open to stare at you. Thereâs an expression hovering on his faceâpart judgment, part amusement, all exasperated affection. âYouâre fucking insane,â he murmurs, but doesnât tell you to stop. You play the song two more times. The last time, he even taps his fingers on the steering wheel in time with the beat. By the time the traffic thins and he pulls up in front of your dorm, itâs fully dark out. The streets are quiet. A light breeze rustles the trees overhead, and your building glows warm from the windows.
The car idles for a moment. Neither of you moves. You fiddle with your bag strap. âThanks. For the ride.â Sukuna shrugs like itâs no big deal, hand still resting casually on the steering wheel. âDidnât want you to get kidnapped. Iâll be pissed if I have to deal with a new project partner this late in the semester.â
You snort. âSo heartwarming. Hallmark should hire you.â But still, your smile softens. You open the door, start to slide outâ
âHey,â his voice cuts in, low. You turn back. Heâs watching you, one elbow propped against the window, his mouth tugged into something just barely resembling seriousness.
âYouâve got a nice voice,â he says, slow. âWhen you sing.â
You blink. Then: âI meanâitâs not good,â he adds quickly, defensive. âJustânice. Like. You know. Tolerable. Shut the fuck up.â Youâre already laughing, your whole face warm, stomach fluttering for a reason that makes you want to scream into your pillow later. You shake your head, half-dizzy, and wave him off.
âFreak.â
He grins. âObviously.â And then heâs pulling away, the soft glow of his taillights disappearing around the corner as you stand there on the curb, heart doing something you really wish it wouldnât.
â
The dorm lounge is dark. A sad, crooked little sign is taped to the door, flapping slightly from the draft in the hallway: CLOSED FOR MAINTENANCE. You stare at it in disbelief.
âYouâve gotta be kidding me,â you mutter. Sukuna makes a noise behind youâsomething between a groan and a sigh that says of course this would happen now.
âWe walked all the way here,â you grumble, adjusting your bag on your shoulder. âAnd East Wing Libraryâs still under construction as well.â You sigh, then shove your phone back in your pocket. âWhatever. Guess weâre not studying tonight.â Sukuna scratches at his jaw, eyeing you sideways. âWe could go to my place.â
You blink. âExcuse me?â
âMy frat house,â he clarifies, as if that helps. You squint at him.Â
âYeah, no offense, but the last thing I wanna do is walk into a testosterone-infested lair filled with Axe body spray and half-naked dudes playing Call of Duty.â
Sukuna smirks. âWhat do you think a frat house is, Animal House?â You raise a brow. âIs it not?â
âItâsâŚmarginally cleaner.â
âUh-huh.âÂ
He grins, lazy and wolfish. âWhat, you scared youâll get corrupted?â
âOh please. Iâm scared Iâll catch a fungal infection from your couch.â
âWow.â He mock clutches his chest. âThatâs the same couch Toji had sex on junior year.â You wrinkle your nose. âYouâre not helping your case.â
â
But youâre already walking beside him as he pulls his keys out of his pocket, smug as ever. The house is surprisingly... not awful. Itâs big, for one. Tall windows, wide wraparound porch. Someoneâs put effort into decorating the front roomâthere are actual plants. A couple are plastic, sure, but still. Progress.
âDonât touch anything,â Sukuna says as he unlocks the door. âYou might set off a trap.â You snort and follow him inside. Almost instantly, voices erupt from the kitchen.
âYo!â someone calls. âSukuna brought a girl? What the fuck?â You round the corner and find a man with gauges, hair tied back into a bun, leaning back in a chair with his feet propped on the table. Chosoâs there too, hair also tied up in a low bun, sipping some horrifying green drink out of a mason jar.
âHoly shit,â Suguru grins, âshe real?â
âSheâs not my date,â Sukuna says, already annoyed. âSheâs my lab partner.â
âUh-huh, heâs actually not making up bullshit this time, Sugu,â Choso says, nodding solemnly between Sukuna and you. âSuguru, you shoulda seen the way he talks about hâ.â
âShut up, bitch.â
âSheâs cute though,â Suguru adds, eyeing you with an arched brow. âYou sure this isnât, like, your redemption arc?â
You just raise a brow. âThis what you call hospitality?â Suguru snorts. âShe talks back. I like her.â
âBye,â Sukuna says sharply, grabbing your wrist. âUpstairs. Now.â
Youâre still laughing as he drags you past the second floor landing. âDamn. Didnât know you hadnât brought anyone home in months.â
âJesus,â he mutters.
âWhatâs wrong, celibate king? Losing your edge?â He stops in front of a door, turns to face you with that cocky smirk curling up again. âYou wishing I havenât gotten laid recently?â
You blink at him innocently. âJust surprised you havenât. With how obsessed you are with yourself.â
âYeah, well,â he says, pushing the door open, âstandards.â You snort. But his room is⌠not what you expected. Itâs neat. Cleaner than yours, probably. Dark wooden desk against the wall, books stacked haphazardly but intentionally. An unmade bed with black sheets and a dark grey hoodie tossed over the pillow. Thereâs a little lamp glowing low in the corner and a record player next to a speaker. You hate how nice it smells in here. You set your bag down on the floor. âWhy does it smell like... sage and expensive soap?â
âBecause Iâm not disgusting?â
âDebatable.â You both settle on the floor, laptops out, papers scattered. He brings over a half-full bag of spicy chips and a water bottle, which he throws at you without looking. It hits you square in the chest.
âDickhead.â
âYouâre welcome.â
The first twenty minutes are actually productiveânotes reviewed, graphs tweaked, last-minute slides double-checked. But inevitably, the banter creeps in. His foot nudges yours under the desk. You nudge back. He leans over to steal a gummy from your bag and you slap his hand away.
âStop stealing my candy.â
âYou ate my gummy worms last week.â
âI didnât steal them. I accepted them.â
âWow. Youâre so full of shit.â
âEat dirt.â He laughsâlow, under his breathâand it shouldnât affect you the way it does, but it sinks into your skin like heat, lingers in your bloodstream. Itâs not the usual cocky bark of a laugh he throws at you when heâs being a menace. This one is quieter. Throatier. Less sharp edges, more velvet. Like heâs amused with you, not at you. It wrecks your focus. Heâs leaned back against the edge of his bed now, legs splayed carelessly, one knee bent, the other stretching toward you like it owns the space. His shirt rides up a little at the waist, just enough to flash the hard lines of his stomach, the deep cut of his hipbones disappearing under black sweats. One of his arms hangs lazy over his knee, veins taut beneath inked skin, fingers playing absently with a red pen. And his hairâfuck. It's a mess, falling over his forehead in soft waves, a few strands catching on his lashes when he looks down. You want to brush it back. You want to tug on it.
You shift slightly, trying to re-cross your legs, trying to re-engage your brain with the paper in front of you. But your sweater dips with the movementâa soft, oversized thing you threw on without much thought. It hangs loose over your collarbones, dips just enough to expose a hint of skin and the swell of your chest where the neckline falls low. You feel his gaze before you see it. A flickerâsubtle, but deliberate. Your eyes lift slowly. Heâs staring.
âYou're staring.â
Sukuna doesnât even flinch. Doesnât pretend to be caught, doesnât have the decency to look embarrassed. He just meets your eyes, unashamed, and shrugs one shoulder in a way thatâs all smooth arrogance. âCan you blame me?â You snort, but it comes out quieter than intended. Your throatâs a little dry. âYouâre gross.â
âYeah?â He shifts a bit, elbow sliding behind him so heâs leaning fully back now, neck tipped against the wall, gaze still locked on you. âDonât act like you didnât wear that on purpose.â
You scoff. âExcuse me?â
He lifts a brow, lazy. âThe sweater. The whole off-duty art girl thing. You knew what you were doing.â
âI didnât,â you protest, but your voice slips a bit, too defensive. âI just⌠liked the color.â Sukuna hums like he doesnât believe you. His eyes stay exactly where they wereâlingering, slow, blatantly appreciating. You glare at him. âYou're an asshole.â
He grins. âTrue.â But then, softer. Less teasing. âYou look cute.â
It lands differently. The words settle between you like something solid, something heavy. Not a joke. Not just banter. Youâre suddenly hyper-aware of everythingâhow warm it is in the room, how quiet. The hum of the old radiator. The scent of whatever he uses in his laundry detergentâsomething clean and citrusy and a little intoxicating. You donât respond. Your heart is thudding against your ribs, a little too loud, a little too fast. He watches you. Waits. Then, finally, you manage: âStop being weird.â But your voice isnât sharp anymore. Itâs soft. Uncertain. He smirks, but his eyes stay serious. âYou love it.â
You roll your eyes, trying to drag your gaze back to your notes, to anything other than the way his gaze is dragging over your skin like a physical touch. You pretend to read, pretend to write, but you feel itâthe tension, thick as syrup in the air. Heâs close. Closer than before. You can feel the heat of him next to you, the way his thigh shifts slightly, brushing yours. Your eyes lift slowly. Heâs already watching you. His expression is unreadableâequal parts amusement and hunger. Heâs studying you like heâs memorizing. Like heâs waiting for the exact right moment to pounce.
And then he moves. No warning. No smart remark. Just a slow lean forward, one hand braced near your thigh as he closes the distanceâeyes flicking from your lips to your eyes and back again, like heâs giving you a chance to pull away.
You donât.
And before you know it, his lips are melding against yours. The kiss is slow. Careful. Not tentative, but measured, like heâs savoring the first taste. His lips are soft, warm, coaxing yours open. His hand comes up, rough fingers brushing your jaw before settling lightly at the base of your neck, thumb against your pulse. You inhale sharply when his mouth deepens against yours, tongue sliding over your bottom lip, teasing, askingâand when you give in, he groans, low and satisfied in the back of his throat. The sound goes straight to your stomach. He tastes like cinnamon gum and spice, something dark and smoky underneath. His teeth scrape lightly against your lip and you gasp into him, fingers fisting in the hem of his shirt without even realizing. When he finally pulls back, itâs barely an inch. His breath brushes against your mouth. His eyes are lidded, lashes low, lips parted and slightly swollen. He looks fucking wrecked. And somehow still manages to smirk. âStill think Iâm gross?â
You blink at him, dazed. âYes.â He laughs, that soft velvet-laced one again. You donât even hesitate this time. You kiss him againâharder, needier, something unspoken unraveling fast between you. Your fingers curl tighter into his shirt, pulling him closer, and he doesn't resistâin fact, he deepens it like he's been waiting for this, like every smartass comment and every prolonged look was just him biding time. His hand drifts, slow, from your jaw to your throatânot pressing, just resting, thumb stroking just under your jawline, grounding you. The contrast of his rough fingers against your softer skin sends heat spiraling straight down your spine. Not just thatâ The hand on your throat sends a wave of heat right between your legs. Like heâs showing you whoâs in control.
He pulls away just slightly, breath ragged, forehead grazing yours. "You kiss like youâve been thinking about this.â You giggle against his mouth. âWhat if I have?â
That makes him groanâlow, deep in his chestâand then heâs kissing you again, more urgent this time, less slow-burn and more fuck, finally. His hand slides into your hair, cradling the back of your head as he tilts your mouth open wider, tongue sliding against yours with a filthy kind of rhythm. You shift instinctively into his space, knees brushing his thighs, your body angling toward his like gravity made the call for you. His hands trail from the length of your back to your ass, squeezing it in his large, calloused palms. It gets hazy, fast. The taste of him, the weight of his palm as it trails from your throat to the dip of your collarbone, fingers catching on the edge of your sweater. He breaks the kiss just long enough to look downâhis hand still on youâand you see the shift in his expression the second he remembers your neckline. He hooks a finger into the v-line of the neckline, exposing the swells of your pretty tits to his hungry gaze.
âSee,â he murmurs, voice rough now, barely-there smile curling the corners of his mouth. âYou did wear this shit on purpose. Look at the way it just falls down so easilyâ âS like you wanted me to stare at your tits.â You breathe out a laughâshaky. âYouâre so full of yourself.â He ducks his head, mouth grazing your collarbone now, slow and deliberate, hands palming your breasts. âYouâre not denying it, though.â
Your response gets swallowed by the way his lips brush the base of your neck, warm and soft, and then he bitesânot hard, just enough to make your breath catch.Â
âFuckâSukunaââ
âSay that again,â he mutters, voice vibrating against your skin. âSay it like that.â You yank at his shirt in response, pulling him closer until he's practically between your legs, notebooks shoved aside and forgotten. He lets you, smiling against your neck, one hand situated on your breast, the other settling on your thigh now, fingers pressing just enough through the fabric of your leggings that it sends your heart into a tailspin.
âYouâreâI donât even like you like that,â you breathe, even as your hips shift slightly forward, even as your body clearly wants him, your heat pressed directly on the very evident bulge in his sweatpants. He drags his mouth back up to yours. âSo stop kissing me.â You kiss him harder.
His hand slides up your thigh, slow but sure, fingers skating over your hip, his palm pressing warm through the fabric. You gasp into his mouth when his thumb brushes just below your waistband, teasing, testing. Still not rushing. Sukunaâs the kind of guy who knows exactly how to draw something out until it burns. His kiss slows againâlike heâs dialing it back, testing your limits. âTell me to stop,â he says, voice lower than youâve ever heard it. âIf you want me to.â You shake your head before the words even leave his mouth.Â
âDonât.â He exhales, almost like relief. âGood.â
Because now his fingers are slipping under your sweater, not even pretending to be shy, tracing the warm skin of your stomach, the skin above your waistband. When he feels the way your breath stutters, he pausesâlifts his head to look at you.
âYou good?â His voice is soft. Different. You nod, swallowing. âYeah. Iâm good.â His lips twitch like heâs amused with how breathless you sound, but he doesnât say anything cocky this time. He just kisses you again, slower now, more methodical, hands exploring like heâs cataloguing every inch of you. Youâre vaguely aware that you're still in his room, that the doorâs closed but the walls are thin, that youâre half-on, half-off his bed surrounded by a mess of notes and highlighters and open laptops. And none of that matters. Because the way heâs looking at you nowâeyes dark, mouth kiss-swollen, hair a mess from your fingersâitâs not just heat. Itâs hunger. Craving. Like heâs been waiting for this since the day he sat next to you in chem lab with that annoying smirk.
And now that he has you? Heâs going to take his time. You're not sure when studying officially got left behind. Somewhere between the first kiss and the way his hands slid under your sweater, books became background noise. The project became irrelevant. Now, heâs laying you back on his bedâslowly, carefully, like heâs trying not to make you overthink it. The room is dim, golden light spilling in from the desk lamp. Your legs are tangled with his, your sweater halfway off your shoulder, and heâs hovering over you, kissing you like itâs something he needs to do, like heâs been trying not to all semester and finally gave up. You feel his hand slide under your sweater again, this time pushing it up your ribs, warm palm skating over your skin like heâs memorizing it. He doesnât even rushâhe just looks down at you like youâre something to unravel, slowly.
âYou sure?â he says again, quieter this time. His thumb brushes just under your bra, like heâs offering you a way out, even now. You nod, heart stuttering. âYeah.â Thatâs all it takes. Because after that, Sukuna moves like a switch flips. His hands are suddenly everywhereâsliding your sweater off completely, tossing it somewhere behind him, and then heâs kissing you again, this time lower, trailing his mouth down your neck, down the line of your collarbone, licking into the dip between your breasts like heâs been thinking about doing it forever.Â
His hand tugs off your bra roughly, making you squeakâ youâre not sure if itâs from the surprise from having the material ripped off of you so roughly, or the fact his long fingers are pinching at your nipples. He takes one in his mouth, sucking and rolling the sensitive bud around, before doing the same to the other one. With each action, you feel yourself getting wetter and wetter, to the point youâre half wishing heâd just take your leggings and panties off, and just get on with it.
âFuck,â he mutters, half against your skin. âYouâreâgod, youâre driving me fucking crazy.â He pulls off your nipple with a resounding pop, eyes darkened by the sight of the sheen of his saliva on your breasts. You laugh, breathless. âYouâre literally the one climbing on top of me right now.â
He looks up at you, hair falling in his face, mouth wet and swollen. âYeah, because you look like this. Wearing that stupid little sweater. Coming to my room. Being allââ He cuts himself off with a groan. âYou knew what you were doing. You expected me not to do all this?â He punctuates this with a light pinch to your nipple, making you squeal.
âI came here to study!â
âYeah, and now youâre in my bed. About to get your little pussy wrecked until you canât walk. Real tragic how that worked out.â You feel yourself heat upâ like your entire body aflame at his vulgar words, mouth opening to retort something back at him. He kisses you again before you can reply, this time rougherâhis hands slipping under the waistband of your leggings, tugging slow and deliberate. You lift your hips to help him, cheeks flushed as he pulls them down and off in one fluid motion, leaving you in just your underwear. His eyes darken.
âJesus,â he mutters. âYouâre unreal. And wet. Fuck, I can practically see your pussy because of how wet you are.âÂ
You reach for the hem of his shirt, tugging it up. âTake this off. It's unfair Iâm the only one half-naked.âÂ
He grinsâsharp, pleasedâand yanks it over his head in one smooth move. Suddenly youâre staring at the body that youâve been unconsciously (consciously) staring at everytime he wears something even slightly form fitted. Defined, lean muscle, broad chest, ink curling along his side. Do you even need to mention the pink smattering of hair below his navel? It makes your thighs clench uncomfortably, making your eyes darken. He catches your look and smirks. âLike what you see, huh?â
âShut up and get back here.â And he does. He presses his body flush against yours, warm and solid, one hand braced beside your head, the other cupping your waist. You can feel how hard he is through his sweatpants now, the heat of it making your breath catch. His hand trails down, teasing the edge of your underwear. âStill good?â You nod, hips shifting toward him. âSukuna, please.â He growls, soft and low in his throat, and hooks his fingers into the waistband, tugging them down. He kisses your neck as he does it, slow and hot, and you shudder. He gets them off and then leans back, just for a second, to look at you spread out in his bed, wet and inviting. His eyes are practically black now, jaw tight like heâs holding something back.
âHoly fuck,â he mutters. âYouâre actually gonna kill me.â You tug at the waistband of his sweats. âThen die faster.â He laughs, breathless, and strips them off, boxers too. Holy fuck. Itâs impressive. Thick and girthy, leaking from the pink tip. You try not to stareâtry being the operative wordâand he notices.
âCute,â he says, climbing back over you. âYouâve been a nuisance to me all semester and now youâre blushing over my dick?â
âYouâre literally about to be inside me. Give me a break.â That shuts him up real quick. He leans in, kisses you slow, hand sliding between your thighs. He teases you with his fingers first, dipping the long digits in and out of your wetness, making sure youâre ready, whispering things against your neckââYouâre so wet already,â and âFuck, this tight for me?ââuntil youâre shaking, seeing stars just from two, thick fingers of his, clinging to his muscled arms. Once heâs deemed that youâre pleasantly even more wet than you were pre-orgasm, he strokes his shaft, the tip pink and angry as he stares with a half lidded gaze at the glistening area between your legs.
And then heâs there, lined up, pushing in slow. You gasp at the stretch, the pressure, your hands grabbing onto his biceps as he sinks into you inch by inch. âGod,â he grits out, forehead pressed against yours. âYou feelâfuckâyou feel insane. Oh myâ Shit, Iâm never letting this pussy outta my sight.â You canât speak. You just hold onto him, breathing through it, until heâs all the way in and stills. Gives you a second. Kisses you again. When you finally nod, his hips start to moveâslow, deep strokes that make your whole body arch into him. Itâs hot and messy and intense, but thereâs something else in it tooâsomething careful. He watches you like he wants to memorize every expression you make, every sound you let out.
It builds fastâfrustration and release and months of tension finally cracking open. His name falls from your lips more than once, and he groans each time like itâs doing something to him.
âS-SukunaâfuckâIâmââ
âI got you,â he mutters, kissing your shoulder. âI got you. Come on, baby. Make a mess on my dick. Yeah, mhm. Fuck.â And when you come, it hits like a waveâsharp and overwhelming, your whole body curling into him, his name leaving your mouth in breathy moans. He follows not long after, hips stuttering as he barely manages to pull out, his warm seed splattering on your stomach, head buried in your neck, cursing softly against your skin. He kisses you briefly, heading quickly to his bathroom to grab a warm washcloth to wipe your stomach clean, tossing the balled up cloth into the hamper in some corner of the room.
Afterward, thereâs just heavy breathing and tangled limbs. His hand finds yours under the sheets, fingers interlacing. Youâre the first to speak, voice still shaky. âThat wasâThat was not studying.â
Sukuna laughsâhoarse, wrecked. âYeah, no shit.â You glance at him. âSo⌠do we pick the project back up tomorrow?â He rolls over, smirking at the ceiling. âMaybe if you let me come inside next time.â You throw a pillow at his face. He catches it without flinching. âWorth it.â
And you laugh, falling back into the sheets beside him, skin still buzzing, body still flushed. For once, everythingâs quiet.
â
You stretch, groaning into the pillow, body aching in a way thatâs half delicious and half criminal. Your thighs hurt. Your back hurts. Your soul might hurt a little. From across the room, you hear the sound of Sukuna's shower turning on. âNo,â you croak, face still buried in the pillow. âI am not moving. I live here now. This is my bed.â
âYouâre literally lying on my hoodie.â
âThen itâs mine now too.âÂ
He snorts. âGet your ass up. We should shower before everyone in the frat wakes up and thinks I killed someone in here.â You peek out with one eye. âYou can go first.â
âI wasnât offering,â he says, walking out of the bathroom with just a towel slung low around his hips. Drops of water are still clinging to his chest, and the tattoos on his ribs look somehow worse in the daylight. In the best way. âCome on.â You blink at him. âYou want to shower⌠together?â
He raises a brow. âYeah?â
âNo.â He squints. âWhy not?â
âThatâs intimate.â
He stares. âMy dick was inside you last night.â You wave a hand. âThatâs physical. This is emotional.â He laughsâactually laughsâand crosses the room in two strides. âYou're such a weirdo.â
âIâm serious! Showering together is, like, emotionally naked. I donât know how to explain it. Itâs so vulnerable. Thatâs like⌠domestic. Thatâs, like, soft.â
He rolls his eyes, completely unfazed. âYouâre such a freak.â Then, before you can protest further, he grabs youâstill very naked, still very soreâand throws you over his shoulder like a caveman. His hand slaps across your ass lightly, snickering to himself.
âSUKUNAââ
âIâm not listening to you spiral about emotional nudity,â he says, totally calm, carrying you into the bathroom like you weigh nothing. âYou moaned my name like a porn star last night. You can handle a shower.â
âI canât walk!â
âWhich is why Iâm being a gentleman and carrying you.â
âYou are the opposite of a gentleman.â He kicks the bathroom door shut behind him and sets you down on the edge of the counter. Steam curls around both of you, hot and fragrantâhis shampoo smells stupidly good, which is somehow infuriating.
You stare at the water, then at him. âThis doesnât mean anything.â
Sukuna grins, dimples flashing. âObviously.â You roll your eyes, but your stomach flips a little anyway. The second you step under the spray, your muscles sigh. Hot water hits your back, and you slump forward with a sound thatâs halfway between a groan and a prayer. Sukuna slides in behind you, and his hands immediately land on your hips, holding you steady like he knew you were about to collapse.
âI told you I couldnât stand,â you mumble, leaning back against his chest.
âI didnât realize you meant it literally,â he says, smirking into the curve of your neck. âYou should work on your stamina.â
âYou should get bent.â
âHm, I think I bent you. Very successfully, actually.â
You try to elbow him, but he catches your wrist easily, still grinning. âWant me to wash your hair?â You eye him warily. âWhat are you gonna do? Douse me in Axe body wash?â
âHey. Thatâs slander.â He grabs a bottle from the ledge and starts working it into your scalp before you can protest. His hands are warm, gentle, and surprisingly careful. Heâs quiet for a second, and so are you. Then he murmurs, âYou smell good.â
âItâs your shampoo. Thatâs like self cest. Youâre saying I only smell good because I smell like you?â
âYeah, but now itâs on you. Itâs different. Not self cest. You just⌠Shut up and lemme wash your hair.â You glance up, heart doing something stupid in your chest. âYouâre being weird again.â
âYeah?â He ducks down slightly, voice lower now, breath ghosting against your ear. âAnd what if I said I like being weird with you?â You freeze. Then you shove a palm into his chest. âShut up. Thatâs so corny.â He laughs, but his grip on your waist doesnât falter. You stay under the water a little longer, letting the heat and his hands and the way his chest feels against your back melt the rest of the tension out of you. When he reaches for the soap again, you catch his wrist. âDo not start anything. I physically canât take another round.â Sukuna leans in, kisses the side of your jaw with a smirk. âDonât worry, baby doll. Iâll be good.â Heâs not. Safe to say you ended up begging for it too.
â
The hallwayâs cold. Way colder than your dignity can handle when youâre limping barefoot behind a shirtless Sukuna in his frat house, wearing his hoodie and a pair of his shorts that might as well be pants. Your hairâs damp, your thighs are wrecked, and your pride? Thatâs somewhere on the floor of his room with your underwear.
âYou didnât have to break me in half,â you mutter under your breath, wincing with each step. Sukuna snorts, completely unbothered. âYou seemed fine last night. And in the shower.â
âI was faking it.â
He glances over his shoulder, smug. âYou were screaming.â
âFaking it loudly, then,â you snap. He just chuckles, steps into the kitchen like heâs not Satan incarnate. Tojiâs already thereâstanding shirtless in front of the stove, flipping protein pancakes in a pan that looks like itâs seen war. He glances up the moment you hobble in behind Sukuna, eyes trailing from your flushed face to the unmistakable fact that you are wearing Sukunaâs hoodie and walking like youâve been in a car crash.
Toji freezes. Then grins. Slow. Evil.
âOh shit.â
You want to die. You want the linoleum floor to open up and swallow you whole. You press the sleeves of Sukunaâs hoodie over your face. âI knew I heard something last night,â Toji says, flipping a pancake like this is the best morning of his life. âTold Choso it wasnât the pipes. Thatâs gotta be why he slept on the couch.â
âI hate this house,â you mumble. Sukuna yawns. âShut the fuck up, Toji.â Toji just cackles. âSheâs limping, bro. You broke her.â Your head snaps up. âShut up! Donât say it like thatââ
âToji,â Sukuna says again, voice dropping low now. âIf you say one more thing, Iâm banning you from ever speaking in the kitchen again.â Toji raises both hands, innocent. âDamn. Yâall are sensitive this morning.â Sukuna grabs a water bottle off the counter and throws itânails Toji square in the chest. Water explodes. Toji wheezes laughing.
âIâm putting a ban on the entire house,â Sukuna mutters, turning toward the hallway. âNobody comes out of their fucking rooms for the next twelve hours.â Toji wipes water off his chest with a paper towel. âThatâs not how a frat works.â
âIt is now.âÂ
You, meanwhile, are dying silently in the corner of the kitchen, gripping the counter for dear life like Bambi on ice. Your legs genuinely might give out. You pull the hoodie lower and try to disappear into it. Toji eyes you, smirking. âYou want a protein pancake, champ? Youâve earned it.â
âI swear to Godââ
Sukuna slams a mug down on the counter. âTOJI.â
âOkay, okay! Damn. Sensitive and possessive.â
Sukuna grabs two mugs, fills them with coffee, then turns to you like nothing happened. âCâmere.â You shuffle over, still avoiding eye contact with the man who just witnessed your walk of shame, and accept the mug gratefully. Your fingers brush Sukunaâs as you take it, and he glances at you. That look again. The one thatâs always a little cocky, a little smug. But softer now. Like he hasnât quite recovered either. You sip the coffee to avoid saying something dumb.
Toji, of course, ruins the moment by smacking the spatula on the counter. âSo whenâs the wedding?â Sukuna chucks a pancake at him. And despite the embarrassment, despite the ache in your thighs and the fact that your ego might never recover⌠when Sukuna leans against the counter next to you, shoulder brushing yours, and murmurs, âStill think showeringâs more intimate than sex?ââyou donât argue. You just bump his hip with yours and whisper, âNext time, youâre the one limping.â He barks out a laugh at that, looking down at you.
âYou sound like youâre gonna peg me.â
âKeep embarrassing me like this and I might just peg you.â
â
It keeps happening. Somehow, even after you swore you werenât gonna end up tangled with a smug frat boy who wears rings like armor and calls you âmenaceâ every time you breathe wrongâhere you are. The project is basically done, but that doesnât change much. You still see each other constantly, like itâs built into your week now. Study sessions, late-night editing, grabbing food on the way back from the library. He still comes over unannounced and flops onto your bed like itâs his, still kicks his shoes off and demands snacks and calls you bossy for forcing him to fix his citations.
And okay, yeah. You keep hooking up. Itâs not even subtle anymore. Sometimes heâll press you into your mattress before your laptopâs even warmed up, muttering something like âfive minutesâ that always turns into an hour. You fall asleep tangled in his limbs more often than youâd like to admit, his hand wrapped around your waist like it belongs there. And itâs not just sexâitâs everything. The way he orders your coffee without asking. The way he instinctively tilts his head down when you talk so he hears every word. The way he looks at you, like heâs memorizing you. Toji and Choso have basically stopped pretending itâs casual. Every time you come over to the frat house, someone whistles or yells, âYo, Sukunaâs girlâs here!âÂ
You always roll your eyes, but your cheeks warm anyway. Sukuna usually throws a middle finger over his shoulder and drags you inside like he doesnât careâbut youâve caught the smirk on his face more than once. But then. One Wednesday, you walk into class a couple minutes late. Youâre digging for a pen in your bag, not paying attention, until you hear itâhis laugh. You glance up. Heâs already in your usual seat. But heâs not alone. Thereâs a girl next to himâcute, brunette, sparkly earrings. Laughing with her hand on his arm like theyâre in the middle of a joke. And Sukuna? Heâs laughing too. That low, easy laugh he uses when heâs genuinely amused. His whole body turned toward her. His eyes crinkled at the corners. Familiar.
Too familiar. It shouldnât matter. Heâs not your boyfriend. You never asked him to be. But something curdles in your stomach, this horrible bitter twist of heat and nausea. Because heâs never laughed like that with anyone elseânot that youâve seen. That was yours. You sit on the other side of the lecture hall. You donât text him back that night. Or the next. Youâre not cold. Just⌠distant. Muted. Detached. You donât flirt. You donât roll your eyes when he calls you names. You donât even rise to the bait when he eats the last of your chips and says, âYou snooze, you lose.â You just nod, distracted. Quiet. The first time he tries to pull you into his lap during a break, you shrug him off.
The third time it happens, he snaps. âThe fuck is going on with you?â You glance up from your notebook, eyebrows raised. âNothing.â
âBullshit,â he says, jaw tense. âYouâve been acting weird all week.â You look at him flatly. âIâve been busy.â
âWith what? Avoiding me?â The words hang heavy in the air. He stares at you across the room, breathing hard, the project open on your laptop but completely forgotten. Your throat is tight.
âForget it,â you mutter, pushing back your chair. He grabs your wrist. Not hard. Just enough to make you stop.
âTell me whatâs wrong.â You inhale, shaky. âI saw you. In class. With that girl.â
His expression shifts, confusion tightening into something sharper. âWhat girl?â
âThe one you were laughing with,â you say, voice brittle. âItâs not a big deal. I justâforgot who you are, I guess. You can talk to whoever you want.â He stares at you. Like he doesnât know whether to scream or laugh. âAre you serious right now?â
You rip your arm from his grip. âYeah, actually.â
âThat was my cousin, you idiot.â You freeze. âWhat?â
âMy cousin. From Osaka. She was visiting campus and sat in for class,â he says, exasperated. âJesus, you thought I was flirting?â
âYou were laughing with her!â
âI laugh with you more than anyone! Does that mean Iâm flirting with you too?â
âYes!â you blurt, and then immediately regret it. His eyes narrow. âSo you do see it.â You open your mouth. Close it. Your face burns. He steps forward, close enough to make your pulse jump. âYouâre jealous.â You look away. âNo, Iâmââ
He cuts you off. âYou are. And you know what? Good. âCause Iâve been going fucking insane pretending weâre just study buddies who coincidentally spend every second together and coincidentally fuck and coincidentally sleep in the same bed, but canât call each other anything real.â You stare at him, breathless.
âI like you,â he says, low and hoarse. âI like you so much itâs driving me nuts. And if you donât feel the sameâfine. But donât act like I havenât been making it obvious.â You swallow hard. âYou have a fucked-up way of showing it.â
He snorts. âYouâre one to talk. Giving me the silent treatment because I laughed once?â
âYou laughed like you do with me,â you whisper. âThatâs what hurt.â
Something flickers in his expressionâsomething soft and real. He cups your jaw.
âI only laugh like that with you,â he says, voice thick. âI only want to laugh like that with you.â Your heart stumbles. âNow shut up,â he mutters, âso I can kiss you.â You do. And he doesâhard, hungry, like heâs been waiting for years. Hands are in your hair, yours are on his shoulders, and everything finally clicks into place. When you pull back, flushed and breathless, he grins. âWell. Youâre my girlfriend now.â You blink. âThatâs not romantic at all.â He kisses your cheek. âDidnât say it was. But itâs the truth.â You shove his chest. âYou suck.â He just grins harder, tugging you back in. âNot what you were saying last week. In fact, you were sucking it.â You groan. But you donât argue. Because yeahâyouâre his now. And he's yours. Officially.
â
Sukunaâs room is warmer than usual. The windowâs cracked, the scent of pine air freshener battling the distinct smell of boyâclean laundry, leftover cologne, something vaguely woodsy. Youâre cross-legged on his bed, surrounded by notebooks and crumpled printouts, while heâs sitting in his desk chair with one foot up on the edge, tapping away at the final slides of your presentation. Toji passed by the door earlier and shouted, âYo, project couple!â before Sukuna flipped him off and slammed the door shut with his heel. Youâre both halfway through your second coffees, the last dregs sloshing around your cups. The projectâs done for real nowâjust tweaks now. Alignment stuff. Graph polish. The usual shit that seems small until itâs 2 a.m. and your brain starts melting.
âYou typed âphotochemistray,ââ you murmur, leaning forward to peer at his screen. He doesnât even look up. âNo I didnât.â
âYes you did.â
âI donât make typos.â You snort. âYou make so many typos.â
âI make sexy typos.â
ââPhotochemistrayâ sounds like a bootleg brand of nerd lingerie.â He finally glances over, one brow raised. âYou say that like itâs not a market I could corner.â
You throw a pillow at him. He laughs, full and low and so familiar it warms your stomach. That soundâs become muscle memory at this point. Embedded into your damn soul. The moment settles. Quiet for a beat. His keyboard clacks, and you start flipping through your notes, eyes skimming blankly. Then, out of nowhere, your voice slips into the silence. âYâknow⌠weâve technically talked before this semester.âÂ
He glances up. âWhat?â
âLike, you and me. Before we got partnered.â He blinks. âWhen?â You hesitate. âThat freshman welcome thing. In the orientation lecture hall. They made people from different majors introduce themselves. I stood up and said something about being interested in environmental science.â He frowns, clearly digging through his brain.
âAnd I stuttered,â you add, dryly. âAnd youâvery loudlyâmocked me from the back row.â Thereâs a beat. His face changes. Just slightly. Jaw tightening.
âFuck,â he mutters. âSeriously?â
âYeah. You said something like, âDamn. Spit it out, dumbass.ââ
He winces. âShit.â You shrug, trying to brush it off. âI mean, whatever. It wasnât a big deal.â
âYeah, it was,â he says immediately, looking at you now with that intense, unreadable stare. âI was an asshole. I didnât even remember that was you.â You shrug again, but it feels a little thinner this time. âYou werenât wrong. I was stuttering.â
âDoesnât fucking matter,â he says. âI was a piece of shit. Iâm sorry.â The quiet that follows isnât awkwardâitâs just⌠charged. The way he says it, that gravel in his voice. The way heâs leaning forward now, elbows on his knees, rings glinting under the dim desk lamp. It does something to you.
âDidnât think the Ryomen Sukuna apologized,â you say lightly. He lifts a brow. âOnly when I mean it.â You nod slowly. Then: âGuess Iâm honored.â His eyes narrowâplayfully, but thereâs heat there now. âYou should be.â Your heart skips. You stretch your legs out, feigning boredom. But the hem of your shorts rides up, and his gaze flickers downâlingers. You see the change in his posture. The way his foot drops from the desk, his chair creaking as he shifts.
âI wasnât gonna say anything,â he says, voice lower now. âBut youâve been sitting there looking like that for the past hour and itâs getting hard to think.â You blink. âLike what?â
He tilts his head, mouth twitching. âAll pretty and smug. Like you donât know exactly what youâre doing to me.â You raise a brow. âIâm literally in a hoodie and gym shorts.â
âAnd yet,â he says, slowly standing. âHere I am. In physical pain.â
You scoff. âMaybe focus on the final slide instead of your dick.â
âMaybe stop sitting there looking like a fucking sin,â he mutters, now crossing the space between you. You donât move. You canât. Your breath is caught somewhere in your chest as he stops right in front of the bed, towering over you, eyes hooded. âCan I?â he asks, voice quieter. Rougher. You nod. The shift is immediate. His hands slide up your thighs, slow and deliberate, as he kneels onto the bed, caging you in. His mouth brushes the shell of your ear as he whispers, âDidnât like that I hurt your feelings.âÂ
You swallow. âYou didnât. Not really.â
âI did,â he murmurs, kissing the side of your neck. âAnd now Iâm gonna make it up to you.â Your breath stutters. He pulls back just enough to look at youâhis thumb grazing your jaw, eyes dark and locked on yours. âYou good?â he asks, tone shifting just slightlyâchecking in. You nod. âYeah.â
âSay it.â
âIâm good.â
Thatâs all it takes. His mouth crashes into yours, all heat and teeth and months of tension bleeding out between your lips. His hand finds your waist, gripping you like heâs been starving. You slide your fingers into his hair, tugging just enough to make him groan. The laptop slides off the bed with a thunk, forgotten. You pull him down with you, and he goes easily, one knee slipping between your thighs, his weight bracing over you. He kisses like he studiesâfocused, intense, overwhelming. His tongue licks into your mouth and your brain just short-circuits. He looks at you for a long second. Then, suddenly, grabs your waist and pulls you into his lap.
âAlso,â he murmurs, breath hot against your neck, âfor the record, if Iâd known the hot chem girl from freshman year would end up riding me like five times a week, I wouldâve introduced myself sooner. And not have been such an asshole to you.â You slap his chest. âThatâs your way of apologizing?â
âYeah, but you like it.â You kiss him to shut him up, and somehow, that turns into another hour of not reviewing the presentation.
â
itâs the final day, and your nameâs being called. You head to the front of the class with your laptop while Sukuna follows, looking every bit the cocky, casually dressed bastard heâs always beenâexcept now heâs your cocky, casually dressed bastard. He nods at the front row like heâs about to win a Grammy, and you nudge his ribs. A significant portion of the project requires an overview accompanied with an oral presentation, so here you are.
âBehave.â
âIâm always well-behaved,â he mutters, grabbing the clicker. You start the intro. He takes over halfway through. You canât help but grin a littleâbecause heâs good. Actually good. Clear, confident, no stuttering, and he even makes Professor Shimizu laugh with a sarcastic quip about the data trend in one of the chemical reactions. And then, without thinking, he leans down and kisses your cheek. Like itâs second nature. The room doesnât even react that muchâprobably because no oneâs shocked anymoreâbut when the class ends and people start packing up, Professor Shimizu catches your arm. She grins. âIsnât that the same boy you were begging me not to pair you with at the start of the semester?â
Your face burns. âWe hadâŚa rocky beginning.â
âMmm,â she says, amused. âWell, you turned it around. Solid work. And the chemistry was palpable.â You groan. âPlease donât say chemistry.â But sheâs already walking away, still smiling to herself. After class, Sukuna drives you back to your dorm like always. One hand on the wheel, one resting over your thigh like he doesnât even notice heâs doing it. Halfway through the drive, he queues something on his phone. And the soft strum of Faye Webster's She Wonât Go Away fills the car. You whip your head toward him. âNo fucking way.âÂ
He doesnât look at you. âDonât start.â
âYou said this was depression music for people who get dumped in the rain.â He clicks his tongue.Â
âYeah, well. Maybe I like that kinda concept now.â You cover your mouth with a gasp. âYouâre evolving.â
âIâm gonna shove you out of this moving car.âÂ
Youâre already singing by the chorus, and even though he groans, you catch him mouthing the words beside you. He tries to act like heâs just being ironic, but his fingers tap the rhythm on your leg, and he keeps the song on repeat the whole ride. By the time he pulls up to your dorm, the sunâs setting. You lean in, eyes soft, smile lazy. âThat was kinda romantic,â you murmur.Â
He scoffs. âDonât get used to it.â You kiss him anyway. And when you pull back, heâs watching you with that grin. The one thatâs half smug, half stupidly, hopelessly fond. âYou know,â he says, âif you werenât so annoying, I mightâve asked you to be my girlfriend sooner.â You blink. âThat was the least romantic thing Iâve ever heard. Like, worse when we had that little argument and you just told me that I was your girlfriend now.â
âYeah, well.â He shrugs. âYou didnât fall for me because Iâm romantic.âÂ
You narrow your eyes. âWhy did I fall for you, actually?â
He leans in close. âProbably the dick.â You shove him away, laughing. âGod, youâre disgusting.â
âAnd yet,â he says, as you open the car door, âyouâre still letting me hit. Also, this song, I actually really like itââ
You squint. âAre you saying this to get laid?â
âNo,â he mutters. âBut if it works, I wonât complain.â You slam the door in his face, but youâre grinning. And heâs still smiling when you look back through the window.
a/n: i had way too much fun writing this lollll now i need sukuna!!!
also, honourable tag for @writesvani bc of whom i actually had the motivation of writing this because she sent the most beautiful words of support 2 me after whisper of the heart. thank u so much and ily immensely <3
tags: @tracysdemise @perqbeth @fushiguroooozzz @bowlware @yuunice @xxstormyprincessxx @bnbaochauuu @beabamboo @erintaro @altgojo @sugurulefttesticle @minascasket @rinofcike @captainquake42 @pinkpookiebear @hellowoolf @clp-84 @yit-tk @nessca153 @domainofmarie @crunchyholo @emochosoluvr @sukubusss @being-blue-is-better @nikilig @syubseokie
SAY YOU WILL â shoot
cw. suggestive (18+). situationship. simon x f!reader. this ones a bit more fluffy heh...
#02 seconds | masterlist | #04
âWant some?â
Simon pulls his face back as you point the massive wheel of candyfloss towards him. Itâs bigger than your faceâin fact itâs bigger than his ownâand heâs in a small state of disbelief that you actually spent eight quid for it. He thinks of the taste: sickeningly sweet, a bomb of rainbows and fairy tales, a touch of nostalgia.
âIâm good, thanks.â He smiles anyways, watching your tongue swirl around the sticky fluff.Â
âSuit yourself.â
Your intertwined hands keep him tethered to you amidst the crowds. Itâs the third dateâif he could even call it that. The dynamic established after that morning is something heâs content with but hasnât gotten his head around yet. Whatever this is between you and him is transactional. You need a good fuck, to feel needed, and heâs still testing the waters of relationships as he figures out what heâs doing with his life.Â
Even though thereâs no romantic involvement there, Simon can see that there is some kind of friendship blooming. One that he doesnât resent. He didnât realise how refreshing it is to know someone whoâs blissfully unaware of his work and what he does; what itâs like talking to someone who isnât riddled with the thought of wars and conflict.
But heâs still restless. The skin around his nails runs red when heâs alone with himself for too long. Itâs difficult to work out how much is acceptable in this dynamic. Time from work is sweet but brief, and it still tags alongside him even when heâs not there. What would you say if you found out about the violent dreams? What would you do if you knew what heâs done? The blood heâs shed. The people heâs lost.
He tries not to feed into these anxieties. He rationalises that you probably wonât stick around long enough to see what lies underneath his skin, to find out the truth. Once the next mission comes, youâll be alone and youâll move on from him and find someone who can be there when you need it. Itâll be a mutual understanding and then he will look for someone else to start trying for something real. Yetâ
Simon canât stop staring at you.
Heâs enraptured. Hypnotized. The blinking fair lights in all their blues and reds and pinks and yellows flicker over your face in a way that leaves him short of thought. Each flash, each colour, reveals another part of your face that he hadnât noticed before, hidden from the naked lights.
The way your jaw hinges as your lips capture the stringy sugar; the crinkle of your nose when the mountain of it touches your face. Simple things that shouldnât have him so stunned, things which shouldnât have his chest growing tight and his jeans feeling tighter.
âOh my god!â You squeal and it catches Simon by surprise, eyes instinctively sharpening, this breath growing shallowerâsinking himself into stealth and awareness. Thereâs nothing in the crowd that would give away an event, a problem, but he surveys the space around him anyways.
You point the stick from your candy to the side, not too far ahead, and Simon tries to notice what it isâ
âLook at that bear!â
Hung above a stall, amidst other toys and stuffies Simon sees itâflourescent like a highlighter, a pink and human-sized teddy. The relief he feels is immediately, his shoulders relaxing back down into low slopes, heart rate steadying, and then: âSeriously?â
You laugh at him, already dragging him towards the game. âItâs so big and fluffy. I need it.â
Simon rolls his eyes, scoffs. âWhere are you even going to keep it?â
Face turning back towards him, your eyes narrow as though trying to look menacing or peeved at him, but your smirk still curls your lipâmischievous in ways that Simon slightly fears.Â
âIn my bedâŚobviously.â
Itâs just his luck that of all the games there could be at this fair, the one with the bear that you need happens to be a shooting one. Thereâs shotguns set up on a wall, crosses on the floor and target papers hung at the back. He finds it amusing, how battered and bruised the wood handles are, how the game master (who looks hardly eighteen) chews his gum and makes short comments to the people playing.
You need three bullseyes to win.
âEasy enough,â you shrug, and then you move onto the X on the floor while the guy sets up the game for you. The concentration on your face while everything is explained to you is endearing, watching from just beside you a crease forms between your brows.
You tuck the gun against your shoulder and smirk. âYou better watch this, Simon,â you humour. âIâm getting that bear.â
He huffs, twirls the stick of candyfloss youâd passed over to him between his fingers. âSure, love.â
Unsurprisingly, on your first turn you miss all three times, none of them aimed even close enough to be considered. You scowl at the papers hung at the back of the stall, trying to refocus yourself as you have another go, a puff of air on your lips as you straighten your spine far too much, firing off the bullets. This time is better, you manage to actually hit the target butâ
âYouâre too tense,â he says while taking a step closer, his chest nearly flush with your back.Â
âIâm not.â
âYou are,â his hand moves between your shoulder blades and he presses there. âRelax your shoulders.â
âLike this?â
Simon guides you into the right stance, arms over yours, a finger ghosting over your own on the trigger. He can feel your breath against him, the heat of your body through his clothes. Itâs intoxicating and nerving all at once, but his body doesnât twitch like it should. Here heâs perfectly calm, his chin ghosting over the top of your head, time slowed.
âNow?â
âNow.â
Two of them shoot straight through the middle, your gasp of excitement electrifying. His praises fly off the tongue easily, a laugh rumbling in his chest. The last bullet just kisses the circle, and youâre beaming, head tipped backward so you can see him, your eyes glowing something wild and precious.
Everything goes blank then, the rest of the world drowned for a few small moments. Relief. Bliss. Content. It bleeds into one big blur until youâre nudging him, bringing him back to his senses.
The bear is more like a mammoth.
Its appearance, very (hardly) bear-like, is almost your own height and stuffed to the brim, heavier than you expected. But even in all its greatness, you lug it all the way homeânot without handing it off to him halfway back.
He comes out of the bathroom, tipsy after the beers youâd shared, to find you in the bedroom, cuddling the thing while you scroll on your phone. Itâs tucked between your head and shoulder, a leg curled over the middle of it, and Simon finds himself eyeing it with a malice which shouldnât exist.
Because itâs just a stupid teddy.
âJealous?â Your voice is rich with mirth, eyebrow quirking as you give him a once over. Heâs in his boxers, and when you bite your lip Simon knows how the evening will end.
âOf a toy?â He scoffs, crawling into the bed next to you. âDonât need tâa be.â
âNow donât be so sure too soon,â you prop yourself up on an elbow. âThereâs not enough space in this bed for you tooââ
Your laughter is all Simon hears when he rolls you onto your back, yanking the bear out of your grasp and tossing it into a corner of the room heâs unconcerned about. Protests come swiftly but just as so he presses his mouth onto yours, swallowing every noise as he kisses you with an open mouth.
He doesnât stop until you go pliant, until you stop squirming in retaliation underneath himâmelting under him as he straddles you.
Youâre a flushed mess when he pulls away, lips wet and breaths shallow as you cross your arms over his neck so he doesnât go too far.
âSimonââ
âDonât need that bear, love.â His fingers curl at your jaw, thumb ghosting over the flesh of your bottom lip. âGot one right âere already.â
part thirty-four âother parts
pairing:Â Simon âGhostâ Riley x fem!reader words:Â 4.5k tags:Â death. blood and gore. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. enemies to lovers. harm to a child. summary:Â After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.
The rattle of vials cuts through the quiet sobbing as you raid the cabinet, stuffing a backpack with painkillers and wound care.Â
"We had antibiotics on us. Where are they?"Â
From the corner of the room, the response breaks apart. "I don't... I don't know about any... This is all we have."
You drop the backpack in favor of the gun at your waist, and direct it at her. "Don't lie to me."
"I-I'm not! I don't know where they are!"
A twist in your gut says she's honest. "Is there any alcohol?" you press with a curl at your lips.
"There's... some... under there."
You lower the gun and move to the sink, uncorking a half-filled bottle that reeks of absinthe. It fits snugly into the backpack. A nod to Nereida. She lowers her own gun from the young womanâs temple. Straps over your shoulders, you step into the smoke-tinged air, leaving the woman behind, when her accented voice chokes out: "You have taken... everything from us."
You stand in the doorway, watching a piece of ash fall on the scuffed leather of your shoe, then glance over your shoulder. "There is still some medicine left in there. Take what you can, get the other women, and leave. This place could be teeming with Greys soon with all the blood spilt. Travel north. We're going south." Her glossy eyes drift up from her hands. Your gaze hardens. "We will kill you if we see you. Do you understand?"
"Yes," she whispers.
You look away. "Salome is in the cell. Alive."
The flames lick at the chapelâs frame as you return to the others. The stone walls have blackened, the door swallowed in fire, windows shattered. The acrid stench of scorched wood and charred flesh burns your nose. The last survivorsâthe few men left after Price and Kyle cleared the barnâhad been shoved inside with the Grey.Â
You need to get out of hereâaway from the stench of blood. Clean water is urgent. A safe place to treat everyone's wounds, even more so, though the missing antibiotics linger in the back of your mind. Adrenaline wearing off, you move quickly, pausing only to hastily dress Blue's feet and Ghost's back with medical cloth from the cabinet before continuing down the main road. While everyone yields a backpack and gun, Ghost carries Blue to his chest. He hasn't once let her go.Â
The flames still flicker behind you when his grip falters. He stops to adjust her weight, and you touch his elbow, speaking low. "Let Price or Kyle carry her."
"I've got it."
You donât press, though the gnawing concern remains. How much blood has he lost? You can only hope it's clotted enough to hold a bit longer.Â
The only words Price manages are instructionsâwhat to watch for to indicate freshwater. Downward slopes, converging animal tracks. Youâre nowhere near as injured as the others, yet your thighs shake, your vision blurs, forcing you to squeeze your eyes shut to regain focus. You still flinch at every sound, ready for blood.
An hour out, the sun hangs heavy. Dense vegetation and a small cliffside offer promise. Carefully, you help each other down. Ghost finally relents, letting Blue cling onto Priceâs shoulders so he can manage rappelling down the rocks. You stay close without thinking, your hand ghosting over his bicep when he wavers.
Then you smell it. Water.
Relief nearly buckles your knees.
A narrow creek winds between boulders, tucked beneath towering cypresses.
Everyone washes off the blood, dulling the stench. A fire will be needed to clean it for the wounds. As you rake water through your hair, your gaze drifts upstreamâwhere cypresses give way to ripened plum trees, bordering what seems like a property. Price sees it too. Heâs already shouldering his backpack, moving to check it out.
The gown pools at your ankles, dipping into the shallow water as you cross. The property is silent, save for the rhythmic tapping of a woodpecker. You tighten your grip on the gun, scanning the unkempt garden and overgrown path leading to the estateâa summer home fit for a family or, as you soon realize, two wealthy old fucks. Their skeletons are all that remain inside, draped in dust like the furniture around them.
Price lowers the rifle to his side and nods in approval. "This will do."
If you could, youâd strip off the stained gown and shut your eyes. Instead, you follow Ghost as he kicks open doorsânothing but a bathroom and parlor. On the second floor, the first door to meet his boot reveals a bedroom. You shake the dust from the quilt, and he carefully lays Blue down. You're already sifting through the backpack.
Ghost kneels to take her feet. He fumbles with the cloth, exhaustion stealing motor function. You help, unveiling the jagged cuts edged with dirt. Ghost grits, "They did this?"
"I did," she whispers. "I hoped you'd find me... and the Greys... they got distracted by my shoes."
Her words linger as you dab alcohol onto a strip of cloth. "This will hurt," you whisper, biting your cheek.
Ghost grips her ankle to keep it still and takes her hand, offering something to squeeze. At first touch, her nails claw at his wrist. Her lips press tightly together to muffle a small sound that dies in her throat, and then she falls silent. Her eyes flutter shut, reopening only to release a lone tear when you finish with both, then wrap them again.
"Your arms," you say, reaching for them. One is already bandagedâmust've been done by them. The other is freshly cut. When you try to look at it, she recoils, inhaling sharply.
"They did this one, didn't they?" he asks.
A slight nod of her chin.
Anger leeches from Ghost's skin.
He exhales sharply through flared nostrils, then gently takes her wrist, pressing a kiss to the skin just before the cut begins.
"Let Twix clean it, baby."
Her fist clenches before she offers you her arm. More tears cut a trail down to her lips.Â
"There. Let's get you something else to wear," you breathe out, stuffing the cork back in once it's over.Â
What you find in the closet is at least better than the bloodied dress she was supposed to die inâa large flannel shirt that smells like old man. Blue accepts it, but stares at the shirt in her hands for a long moment before asking Ghost to look away. He does, and you help her, keeping your eyes on hers while undressing her.
You turn to Ghost. "Your turn," you whisper.
Lowering to the bed is a great effort, one you have to steady with a hand under his armpit. As gently as possible, you peel the cloth from his back. Seeing his wounds before did nothing to prepare you for thisâup close, in the unforgiving sunlight. Deep, inflamed gashes ooze fresh blood at the disruption. The stench of festering flesh makes it hard to focus as you murmur for Blue to touch his hair, distract him for the first dab of alcohol.
Where Blue was able to silence herself, he cannot. Not when itâs this bad. The terrible, wrecked groan and the violent jerk of his body make you want to disappearâto run and let someone else do this to him. But you know you wouldnât. You wouldnât trust anyone else to. So you steady the tremble in your fingers and continue, the room heavy with his pain. It finds its way to your back, as though someone behind you is holding a whip. The phantom pain sinks into your skin with each of his groans, forcing you to push it away to steady your hand as you work.
Blue twists her fingers in his hair, whispering in his ear. "It's almost over, dad."
By the time the wounds are cleaned, redness remains, offering little reassurance. Over a day's worth of sweat and bacteria isn't something you can simply undo. You'll need to keep an eye on them for infection. You sift through the vials and push two painkillers to his lips, helping him sit up to swallow them. As youâre about to help him back down, he grabs onto your wrist, a pulse of pain pulling your gaze to where you slit your own vein. The linen strip is soaked through. Ghost silently unties it and reaches for the alcohol at the bedside table.
"They did that?" Blue questions from behind him.
"I did."
The pain sears as he cleans it, though itâs nothing compared to his.
When he lays back on his stomach, thereâs no fighting the heaviness of his eyelids. Blue curls up beside him, wincing. You get her two painkillers as well.
"Is he going to be alright?" she asks quietly.
You pull the light quilt over her body. "His body just needs to rest. So does yours."
"That's not an answer, Twix."
The way she calls you out makes your face fall. "I'm sorry. I just... I don't know."
There is a pause of silence before she sighs audibly, arms falling flat at her sides and her gaze finding the ceiling. "I don't think I can sleep."
Your chest tightens at the thought of what she must be thinking of, what she must have seen when you weren't with her. The wounds you can't wrap up. You dig for one of the sedatives: lorazepam. "Here."Â
It takes a while for it to take effect.
"You're safe," you whisper to her, over and over, tucking her hair behind her ear until you feel the subtle shift in her muscles as they slowly loosen from their panicked tension. When sleep finally comforts her, a shift in the air causes you to leap up.
"It's me," Nereida whispers, poking in her head. "The others are sleeping, too."
Right. The others. "They're alright?"
"Just a few fractured ribs."
"Someone needs to keep watch."
"I'll do it." Seeing the protest twist on your face, she adds, "You haven't slept in days."
She's right. It was impossible to sleep in that cell outside of being drugged.
You give in. "Patrol the whole property if you can. And keep track of the air. The flowers here should help mask our scent, butâ"
"I've got it, Twix."
The fatigue truly hits when she leaves. You barely have enough fight in you left to peel off the stupid dress and raise another flannel shirt from the closet over your head, the hem resting above your knees. There is a chair in the roomâthat's where you sink down, knees tucked to your chest. At first when you close your eyes, the world is loud and red. Then, it quiets to black.
A dove call announces morning, and you jolt awake to fresh light from the window.
You fell asleep.
They've already killed her.
You didn't get there in timeâ
Your gaze lands on the small body lying in the bed beside a much larger one, and the panic escapes through a shaky breath. You inhale and exhale to calm your heart rate before uncurling from the chair to touch Blue's soft cheek. The skin is cool. You move to her father next. Palm to his forehead. Hot, dry skin snaps your touch away as if burning you.Â
"Fucking shit," chokes out of you, along with a fresh wave of urgency. Blue stirs in her sleep. You clamp a hand over your mouth to quiet yourself and whirl out of the room. A fever: you need water. If you hadn't slept so long, you could've boiled some sooner. With the recovered energy, you race outside in the chilled morning air.
Nereida sits up from the porch.
"Good morning. You're the first one up. I haven't seenâ"
"He is burning up," you seethe. "You should've waken me. I slept all through the night!"
Her eyes widen. "I didn'tâ"
You push past her. "I'm getting water."
She lightly touches your elbow. "I already got some from the creek. I boiled it over the fireplace." She rushes to show you the full metal pot in the kitchen.Â
You don't pause to say thank you, hoisting the water upstairs to urgently wet a cloth and place it over his forehead. His lashes flutter, once, then twice, before fully opening.
"You have a fever," you exhale, swallowing hard. "I need you to drink a little."
He sits up to swallow a handful of the water from your palm, faint bobs of his throat, and you feel just how dry his lips are. His voice emerges low. "Did they have anything for it?"
"I couldn't find the antibiotics," you bitterly admit, swiping a thumb over the faint freckle on his temple, as if maybe, the sip of water has already changed the temperature. It hasn't. A growl pushes under your breath. "The bitch probably lied to me and took them. We'll need to experiment a bit for now."
"Sounds promising," he manages through his teeth. He glances down at his daughter. "She's alright?"
"She's okay, not warm." You inhale sharply. "Lay down. Let me look at it again."
When he does, you gently remove the bandages and are met with yellow-green pus. The sound that fills your throat, caught between helplessness and disgust, has him popping an eye open to look back at you over his shoulder. "Sorry, it's just..." Another explicative leaves your lips, and you have to bite your cheek hard to keep from vomiting at the sight and smell. Blue is awake now, sitting up against the pillow; she need only glance over once for her face to twist in concern.Â
"It's bad, isn't it?" She covers her mouth.
"I need to drain it," is what you say. Luckily, it's already oozing, saving the need to puncture the wounds open. You wet another cloth and carefully press at the swollen ridge of the first laceration, making him groan through his teeth as pus begins to run down his sides. Blue has one hand back in his hair, and uses another wet cloth to collect the pus. You keep pressing, draining each irregular wound, having to remind yourself the rotten smell being released is for the better.Â
After what feels like hours, it's mostly cleared. Only a bit of swelling remains, revealing just how deeply the skin was shredded, as if slashed through repeatedly in the same spots.Â
"How come you were hurt more than the others?" Blue asks him the question you've been mulling over since the moment you found him.Â
"I was their favorite," he mumbles lowly. "The most handsome."
Your brows lower.
"It's not funny," she presses, nails twisting in his hair, teeth grinding. "It's infected. You could fucking die."
"I won't," he says to her, but the silent, heavy glance you exchange with him acknowledges the understanding that he very well could, deepening the harsh pit in your stomach. "We have a nurse here."
"An unlicensed one." You finish securing a new layer of cloth and lean back. "And one without real medicine." Realizing you are supposed to be reassuring her, you hide the way your nails pick each other and add, "But draining all that pus will help. Eating will help even more," you look at Blue, "For you, too."
Blue and you share a meal of wild cucumbers, strawberries, and two small field mice you catch by the creek, swiftly snapping their necks before skinning them. For Ghost, you boil the bones with garden carrots to make a broth. You have to coax him into finishing it, no matter how it tastes, promising that once it's done, he can sleep longer.
By the time the others are awake, you and Blue have failed to leave his side, simply watching the continued rise and fall of his chest as if it might halt if you look away. "Please get better," you catch her murmuring. The only time you go is to speak with Price, informing him that Ghost is in no condition to travel again.Â
"Twix," he interrupts you, the knowing tick in his brow, and worn smile, making you realize you'd been rambling, your tone coming off a bit accusatory. "I have no intention for us to continue yet. No one is ready for it. We need food, and rest."
You release a filtered sigh, nodding. "I can help hunt, I just need toâ"
A firm hand finds your shoulder. His seafoam eyes glance past you at the door to the bedroom, then back into your gaze, low voice barely above a murmur. "You've done more than enough. Let us take care of the food. Just make sure we don't lose him, alright?"
You nod, and when he turns to leave, you mutter to yourself, "I'm trying."
You spend the evening refreshing his bandages, and draining the new wave of pus. You have the idea to look for onions in the garden, remembering they have antimicrobial properties, but there aren't any. So you clean the wounds again with a flush of water, and also scrub his dirty hair a bit. Your brain must be tricking you, because once when you touch him it feels like his fever has at least dropped a degree or two, but then a minute later it feels like it went up more. There is practically no color to his skin except the angry red of his wounds, and the rosy sheen on his cheeks. Other than that he is a pale ghost. It's as if your efforts haven't done a thing.Â
Frustration strangles your lungs, and you palm at your forehead. His body, deprived of sleep and nutritions for days, is struggling to bounce back, to fight off the encroaching bacteria. His unyielding strength is yielding; succumbing. He needs more food and water. You try to sit him up again, retrieving a small bit of leftover broth, but he is unable to help pull his weight.
"Come on, Simon. Please."
He's too heavy for you, even with Blue pulling at his other arm.
You hurry out of the room and call for Price. He and Nereida are there quickly, his rifle ready. "No, I just needâI need you to lift him."
Price drops the gun to steady Simon up despite the heavy hiss of protest. "Gotta eat, Simon."
He holds him as you spoon broth to his mouth, having to rub at his jaw to release enough tension for him to open it and swallow.Â
The room is quiet once it's all done, and Nereida stands in the doorway with her head hung low. Price carefully lays him back down so as not disturb the work you've done to his back. He glances at the empty bowl in your hands. "Kyle cut up some squirrels he killed earlier. I'll tell him to make more broth with them in the morning."
All you can do is nod and pass the bowl to him.
When they leave, the heaviness in the room has Blue picking at her wrist. You take her hand, placing another painkiller and sedative in them, and urge her to lay down for more rest.
"I'll stay up with him, alright?"
Her chin drops, and she stares blankly at the quilt. "What happens to me if he dies?"
The hollowness in her voice cuts through you. "We can't think like that," you murmur, refusing to acknowledge how terrified the answer makes you.
"Why not?" Her eyes blaze in the dark. "It's a possibility. I've never seen him like this before."
You shake your head, touching two fingers under her jaw to tilt it up so yours eyes meet. "He's stubborn, like you. And he has too much to live for. He loves you."
She looks away. "I'm not like him. I wouldn't be able to keep going on my own."
"Youâll never be on your own. He and I... we will always come for you," you swear, your voice firmer than you intend. You soften it to a whisper, breathing out, "But even if you were, youâre smarter and stronger than anyone here. Thereâs nothing you canât handle, Blue. It was you who kept yourself alive this time."
"It was just luck," she murmurs, curling a fist into the sheet below her. She peers back at you. "If you guys hadnât found me, I wouldâve been bitten to death."
"No," you insist. "It wasnât luck. You survived because you saw the opportunities, and you took them. You made time for us to find you. You are just like him."
Emotion floods through you, thick and reeling. Without thinking, you pull her into a solid hug, pressing your nose to her scalp. "Youâre just like him," you whisper again, screwing your eyes shut. White-hot tears escape, burning a quiet trail down your cheeks, and you feel her begin to tremble in your arms, silently soaking your shirt with her own tears.
Through them, she manages to whisper, twisting your shirt in her fists, "I-I don't want him to leave me again. H-he said he wouldn't."
"He won't," you promise, struggling to catch your breath through a choke, the words rushing out of you. "Never again. I won't let it happen."
After minutes, hours, like this, she grows limp with exhaustion, and you lay her back down, tucking her under the quilt and wiping your cheeks.Â
You resume position in the chair by Ghost.Â
This time, you refuse to close your eyes, locking them onto himâthe way his cheek is squished against the pillow, the bare stretch of his arm, the curve of his ribs where an old scar splits into the new ones. You keep pulling the blanket over him, thinking maybe the extra heat will break his fever, only to rip it back off moments later, convinced the cool night air would be better. Frustration burns behind your eyes as you rub them hard, then press your forehead against the uninjured part of his shoulder.
âGoddamn it, Simon,â you whisper, pulling back just enough to trace your thumb over the freckles there, connecting them with soft, absentminded sweeps of your finger.
He needs more.
Real medicine.
Either the women are long gone with it, or it's somewhere none of them knew of.Â
This is what you mull over well into the night when sleep threatens with a pull at your lids, and again, you see red. Blood-red. Like the burst of an open throat. You reopen them and jolt up to your feet, panting hard. The need for a distraction to keep yourself awake pulls you out of the room for a stretch of your legs, pupils straining against the dark hall as you stumble through it, crossing your arms over yourself. You've barely looked through this place besides what was necessary, so it's a surprise when you happen upon a spiral staircase going up, not down.Â
A cool metal rail bites your fingertips as you heave upward, revealing a small attic library. Dark oak shelves reach the low ceiling, all of the leather spines neatly alined as if never having been touched even once: a capsule of time. A large window at the far end offers enough moonlight for your eyes to scan the embellished spines as you brush a finger over them, various French titles staring back at you. You work your way to the window, where the thin curtain is parted just enough to allow you a view of the creek, cliffside, and dark horizon where stars disappear into distant earth.Â
"I shouldn't have believed her. I should've made her talk more." The words barely leave your lips before the stench of burning flesh fills your senses. Your hands shake violently. With a sudden, forceful yank, you tear the curtain from the rod. Your voice cracks, rising with rage. "I should have killed herâall of them. I shouldn't have let a single one walk away!"
You spin around and begin pulling books off the shelves, ripping at pages, thrashing them at the floor with a cacophony of thuds, until only half are left untouched. The years-old dust caking the covers explodes into your eyes, stinging them, and tears begin to fall, the painful kind. They come hard, ragged, anything but quiet. You sink to the oriental rug, burying your face into your knees and hugging them close as you sob through your teeth, scraping your nails into your shins.
You imagine all their faces: the blonde man who tortured them, the old woman you only saw once when they took Blue, all the pretty eyes beneath the stupid veils. In your head, you slash all of them to pieces. Shreds. Torn nerves and burst eyes. Until you are swimming in their entrails.Â
There is a voice. In your head maybe. But no, it's realâsomeone touches your shoulder, and you flinch. You lift your gaze, and through it, make out the shape of warm, almond eyes, one of them half-opened beneath a swollen bruise.
Kyle kneels beside you. He doesn't say anything, just sits there, his knee touching yours the only point of connection. When your crying subsides, you feel a tinge of embarrassment at the state he's found you in, and wipe at your cheeks. "Sorry. I woke you up."
"I was already awake."
Silence hums between you, and he thoughtlessly picks up one of the books, thumbing through the pages, then quietly closes it.
"We all owe you our lives, you know. Nereida told us about all you did."
You dig your chin into the tops of your knees and stare off at the wall. "I still didn't do enough."
"You're doing all you can." His gaze pierces into the side of your face, making you feel translucent. "He'll be alright. Always is."
You don't know what to say to that, sighing through flared nostrils and looking down at your feet before over at him. "How is Ari?"
"He's alright. Just shaken, I think. Thank you for asking." A tinge of guilt finds you that you haven't checked on them enough. Ari, just a boy, and he's hardly crossed your mind through any of this.
"You know," Kyle continues quietly, his knuckles whitening around the book. "When we were in there, I didnât know what to say to get him through itâbecause I couldn't see much hope myself. I had to watch, do nothing, while they made him memorize that goddamn book just to earn a meal. And he wasnât allowed to share any with me." He lets out a short, bitter snort. "I've never felt so fucking weak. So powerless. Watching someone you love suffer, not knowing how to help them..." His gaze locks onto yours. "That has to be a pain worse than any torture."
His words catch you off guard, stirring something deep and unformed. All you can do is reach for him, gripping his shoulders in a firm hug, evening your heart rate. He murmurs a promise about the broth, his hand brushing your shoulder before he excuses himself. Returning to the bedroom, you check their pulsesâher pinky curled around his in sleep. You press a kiss to Blueâs hair, then, without thinking, let your lips brush her father's fevered temple. All you can think of is the harsh burn of his skin, and the medicine you know he needs.
defiance | king!sukuna x concubine!reader master list
chapter sixteen: dream's over
summary: a psychic shares her vision with the king, saying that his soulmate would replace all 5 of his concubines one day. he had her banned from the premises for that absurd prediction. it wasn't until months later when he started believing the old bitch, after one cute yet disobedient servant started working at the shrine.
genre: female reader, heian era au but incredibly historically inaccurate, 18+, grumpy x sunshine, fluff, smut, so much crack, angst, mutual pining, might be seen as dubcon but she wants him lol, pregnancy, no he wont have two sets of arms, and no he wont have two dicks, srry srry srry
fic warnings: profanity, explicit smut, ooc, mentions of grooming, graphic depictions of violence, suicide, more will be added as story progresses
word count: 4.4k
notes: i really haven't update in a month and?? how time FLIES. anyways, i hope you sexies enjoy this chapter. we get some more domestic sukuna and more info on these frequent meetings he's been having ((:
Sukuna has decided to throw a small festival as a way to celebrate your pregnancy now that you are 7 months along.Â
Youâre not really sure what he means by small, and you honestly donât believe him because he only throws festivals strictly for the purpose of receiving gifts and blessings. Knowing this was meant for you and your unborn child, you doubt itâll be anything but small, he probably only told you that so thereâd be no pushback on your end.Â
But no pushback at all, youâre on the same boat as him when it comes to gifts and blessings for the baby. The more the merrier.
The festivalâs a couple weeks away but preparations have already started around a week ago since the servants needed to start drying and pickling all sorts of different foods.Â
As for you, you were in the dressing room of your shared chambers with Sukuna, waiting for the tailor to arrive.Â
Renovations had finally finished and you both were able to move back in. At first you insisted that the expansion wasnât that necessary but you can appreciate it now.Â
There was now a courtyard, some extra rooms, an expansion on the greenhouse, along with the koi pond and sandbox in the back that Sukuna tries hard not to act too excited about.Â
It was more of a small compound now within the estate, providing extra privacy which brought you easeâ youâve been waking up with feelings of dread over nothing in particular lately.
It wasnât anything alarming since there really wasnât anything to be worried about, but the feeling still put you on edge.Â
âI didnât pay that old hag to take her fucking time to get here,â the king groans, pulling you out of your thoughts and making you click your tongue at his impatience.Â
âWhat time is she supposed to be here?â You ask, even though you already knew the answer.Â
â11.â He scoffs.
âItâs 10:52,â you let him know, making his eyes roll into the back of his head because he believes hired help should always be 30 minutes early. âPatience is a virtue, Kuna.âÂ
âI practically own that woman, I donât need patience,â He quickly retorts. You canât help but laugh when he gets all pouty like this, knowing heâll go back to his quiet, serious self once the woman and her assistant arrive.Â
âAnd who are you to talk, hm?â He adds. âYou had a servant crying and throwing up for not bringing you your lunch on time last week.â He said, pointing his finger at you.
He smirked at the thought of what you couldâve possibly said to the girl since it was still a mystery.
You and the servant refuse to say what atrocities came out of your mouth that day, which makes him even more curious because it couldnât have been anything worse than the things you have said to him throughout your pregnancy.Â
But with the way youâre glaring at him for bringing it up again, it was probably something 100 times worse than what heâs ever had the displeasure of experiencing.
âI thought we werenât going to talk about that again,â you nearly scolded him.
âIâll let it go,â he leaned back and said. âIf you allow me to complain about that bitch who is now two minutes late. I fucking told you, she doesnât need people being patient with her. What she needs is for you to repeat whatever the fuck you said to that servant so she can start crying and throwing up tooââ
âThe tailor is here, My Lady!â Hayami yelled out from the front of the house, cutting Sukuna off mid-rant because the whole entire house could hear him, and so would the tailor had he kept going.Â
âOkay let her in!â You yell back and the father of your child genuinely looks wounded from how powerless heâs become against you and your ladies in waiting.Â
âSo you all are just going to interrupt me like that?â He whispers but keeps his argumentative tone.Â
âYes,â you break it to him. âNow sit down and donât mention anything about her being late.âÂ
The tailor warmly greets you both when she comes into the room, congratulating you both over the shrine's newest addition.Â
You both thank her and Sukuna surprisingly starts up small talk with the woman.Â
Your thoughts on how oddly respectful he was being quickly came to a halt when âthe journey here mustâve been pretty taxing, huh?â came out of his fucking mouth. The poor tailor didnât know he was just having a mini tantrum because you had hurt his feelings not too long ago.
You pinched the low of his back the moment he said that, causing his smile to grow even wider because it fucking hurtâ which scared the woman since the king experiencing any other emotion aside from homicidal rage was quite literally unheard of.
Seriously, she doesnât know how you get along with him. Sheâs honestly suspicious of you too.
Maybe the rumors were true and you were a witch.Â
But she doesnât care, itâs none of her business and Sukunaâs paying her a rather generous amount for today. Itâs safe to say that sheâd gladly serve you even if you just so happened to be satan reincarnated with just how much money she was making today.
The fitting was.. interestingâ for all three of you.Â
The woman wasnât expecting you both to act so domestic around each other.Â
As for you and Sukuna, you just couldnât get on the same page as this woman. Youâre pretty sure she thinks youâre someone who got pregnant the night you lost your virginity with the outfits sheâs suggesting for you and you can tell the kingâs going to pop a vein because of it.Â
âSheâs pregnant, not a nun, stop trying to fucking dress her like one,â Sukuna grumbles with his head in his hands after the third fitting.
You donât snap at him this time and youâre actually grateful for his attitude because you didnât have the heart to say anything to the woman.Â
âRight, my king,â she immediately stiffens up. âI apologize.âÂ
After a few more outfits you were able to finally decide on which one you liked. It was still modest compared to some of the things youâve worn around the shrine before, it was something acceptable for both you and Sukuna.Â
Once the tailor finally leaves after 3 grueling hours, Sukuna slams the doors shut without even saying goodbye, leaving the two of you alone again.
âPinching me in front of her, really?â He clicked his tongue. You honestly forgot you even did that, but youâre not surprised he hasnât let it go.
âShe did not see that, she probably just thought my hand was on your back,â you say, not taking him too seriously.
âYou still broke skin.âÂ
âDoubt it. Turn around and let me see,â you nearly demand.Â
âAnd now youâre ordering me to turn around like Iâm some brood whore for the night,â he retorts and you burst out laughing from how dramatic heâs being.Â
âOh you think this is funny?!â He nearly starts laughing with you as he cups his hands around your jaw.Â
âI think itâs hilarious my king,â you say back.
âI remember every time you disrespect me, you know?â His question is more of a statement, a rather threatening one.Â
âDo you now?â You ask, rubbing your thumbs over his hands, entertaining his antics.Â
âI do,â he promises. âI bottle them up and throw them in the part of my brain thatâll magically unlock once thatâs brats out of you.âÂ
âIâm sure you do, my love.â You reach out to cup his check with one hand. âLetâs hope you follow through with these statements given the fact I havenât gotten this side of you in a very long time.âÂ
âOh youâll get it all.â His entire demeanor lights up as he continues to eye you up and down like youâre some kind of prey.Â
And to think you wouldâve crumbled under his gaze at one point, now youâre nearly making him promise to fuck you up once the time comes.Â
Heâs created a monster and is quite pleased with that.Â
He pulls you into his embrace and starts whispering some more lewd things in your ear, just because it makes you giggle more than anything and he loves to see it.Â
And also because thereâs a part of him that thinks the baby will hear it if he doesnât whisper.Â
But he keeps that theory to himself because he knows youâll make fun of him for it and you make fun of him enough.Â
âSorry to interrupt buââ Hayami comes to the door knocking, unaware of the little moment you two are having.Â
âYou women do NOT get enough days off, do you?!â He snaps, nearly throwing his head back.
âWe do not, my king,â Hayami chirps, keeping her cheerful tone because sheâs not really that scared of him anymore. âKaori is here to visit you,â she turns her attention to you and says.Â
Sukuna lets out a long sigh into the crook of your neck and mutters something along the lines of wanting to get rid of her already.Â
You pat his back because all he wanted to do was to get some extra time with you before he goes off and does whatever he does.Â
Unfortunately, you still arenât 100% sure what  exactly he does, you just know thereâs a lot of paperwork and random yelling involved.
âCan you lead her to the sun room and let her know I'll meet her there shortly?â You ask, trying to somewhat meet the man holding on to you halfway.Â
âOf course, Iâll get some tea and snacks prepared as well.â Hayami says before making her way back to the entrance of the house.Â
It takes some time getting Sukuna off your back, but you eventually get him to put one foot in front of the other towards his office.. the office that was literally just upstairs.Â
He drags his feet to get there of course, wishing youâd tell Kaori to fuck off so you could hang out with him instead while he signs off on different bills and contracts and whatnot.Â
But you promised youâll come back right after and heâs holding you to that, even though thereâs not much of a consequence if you donât.
You let out a little sigh once you hear the door to his office fully shut and canât help but laugh to yourself. The longer youâre with him, the more clingy he gets.Â
The kingâs a smart man and youâre sure he is aware of how clingy he is, he just doesnât care how he acts around you anymore.Â
âSorry to keep you waiting,â you apologize to Kaori, whoâs been waiting for over 20 minutes now since sheâs sat down.Â
Had you not held such a high position in the estate, she wouldâve ripped your head off by now for the disrespectâ preoccupied with the king or not.Â
But youâd never know that.
âItâs no worries at all!â She assures you before squeezing your hands. âIâm sure itâs a lot dealing with King Sukunaâs.. moods.âÂ
âYeah,â you exhaled as you said it.Â
You and your ladies in waiting have resorted to placing any and all sorts of blame on Sukuna and his infamous temper, even though he never gets mad at you and is surprisingly respectful to your attendants.Â
Itâs just more believable for others to hear that heâs having a meltdown, rather than something as simple as him refusing to get out of bed with you because you were extra warm on a cold morning.Â
âThank you for being so understanding,â you try to say with a straight face. âWhat can I help you with?âÂ
âNothing at all,â she perks up. âI just wanted to bring some goodies for you,â she smiles and opens a box full of mini cakes and candies. âIâm sure the baby would love these!âÂ
âOh no, Iâm so sorryâ Iâm not allowed to eat these,â you reveal and she tries her hardest not to raise a brow at you.
Sukuna forbade you from eating anything that wasnât made by Hayami, Miya, or Akari. Itâs honestly the one rule that youâre completely on board with, given the long history of queens, consorts, and concubines experiencing attempted poisonings in the past.Â
âThatâs a little harsh of him, donât you think?â The concubine nearly pouts at your decline.Â
âNot really. I feel bad having to decline of course, but if following that rule brings him some peace of mind then I donât mind.â You say.Â
âIâm sure he appreciates all the sacrifices you make for him,â her lips thin after the words leave her mouth.Â
âIâd hope so,â you say sympathetically, you really do feel bad for turning her down. âLadies! Would you like some cakes?â You turn around and call out.
âOf course!â Miya pokes her head into the green room. âThese look yummy Lady Kaori, did you make these yourself?âÂ
âYes, but with the help of my attendants of course,â she gestures to the two women who have come with her today.Â
âWe canât wait to try them! Iâll go ahead and take these to the back to share with the girls, thank you again!â Miya says as she offers her one last smile before leaving.Â
âIâm glad someone was able to take them, you mustâve worked hard making them,â you say as you both get up from the table.Â
âOh it was nothing,â she brushes you off. âIâm just glad someoneâs able to eat them!â She forces out a laugh and you try to laugh with her.Â
But itâs uncomfortable because she is clearly offended, even though theyâre Sukunaâs rules, not yours.Â
âIâll get going, let me know if you need anything.â She says before turning on her heel to leave your chambers.Â
âThank you, I will.âÂ
Once she and her attendants finally leave, you head to the back to find the girls, who are most likely hanging out in the kitchen.Â
Which they were, the three of them were just hanging around and talking.Â
âHow were the cakes?â You ask as you lean against the counter.Â
âNo clue,â Akari says.
âIf she does ask, tell her they were great,â Hayami follows, giving you a little wink.
âWait, did you throw them away?âÂ
âDuh.â Hayami says. âMiya just took them so you wouldnât be in an uncomfortable situation. If youâre banned from eating outside food, then weâre definitely not going to be eating food thatâs gifted to you either. We donât want to get poisoned.âÂ
âYou really think Kaori would try to poison me?â You ask, genuinely concerned.Â
âNot sure, but weâre not trusting anyone right now.â Miya adds to the conversation.Â
âFair enough,â you let it go. âJust burn them, or bury themâ something. I donât want any servants peeking through the trash and seeing that. Itâs been peaceful around here and I'd like to keep it that way.âÂ
â-
âYouâre starting the hearings early today,â you offer the king a faint smile, as he frantically moves back and forth around the roomâ trying to get himself ready for the shitshow thatâll become of his day.Â
âKuna,â you impatiently snap your fingers while trying to get the manâs attention.
âHm? Ohâ yeah,â he stops for a second and just nods.
âWere you even listening to me?â You cross your arms, nearly squinting at him because heâs failing miserably at whatever heâs hiding right now.
âNo, Iâm sorryâ what were you saying sweetheart?âÂ
âThe hearings,â you nearly grit your teeth. âAwfully early for them, no?â
âNo-â he shakes his head. âNo hearings today,â he corrects you and it honestly pains him to do so. Heâd much rather have a hearing today.Â
âThen what are you in such a rush for? The sunâs barely out. And why wonât you look at me?â You begin to raise your voice at him and it doesnât even register in his head that youâre frustrated with his lack of communication this morning.
He swiftly puts on his haori and walks up to you, his hands now cupping your cheeks as he just stares at you for a moment.Â
Heâs worried, you can see it in his eyesâ distant but nearly pleading for help and you donât think youâve ever seen him look this defeated before.Â
âPromise you wonât freak out?â He asks.Â
âI wonât. Whatâs going on?â You nearly plead, knowing nothing good was going to come out of what he was going to say.
One hour laterâ
âAnd heâs how old?â Sukuna nearly chokes out as he demands Uraume for clarification.Â
The rooms filled with all of the district's shoguns, their advisors, and all high ranking generalsâ all equally as stunned as Sukuna himself.
Today was their third meeting since Uraume started spying on the west border, with this recent mission uncovering even more details on what they've been planning for a while now.
âSeven, my king.âÂ
The rooms quiet for a moment after that, except for a quiet âno fucking wayâ that came from one of the younger generals. Speaking out of turn like that is a punishable offense, except nobody really gives a shit right now, he said what everyone else was thinking.
The western region, or rather the Zenâin clan, hasnât gone against the peace treaty in yearsâ hundreds of years actually.Â
The fact that theyâre planning on breaking it now is a surprise in itself, not to mention the absolute trump card theyâre using as leverage, in the form of a literal child.Â
âGeneral Toji, you grew up under that clan, care to share more about them?â The king basically calls the man out as all the attendees turned their attention to the high ranked general.
â..Yeah,â he husks out. âIâm pretty sure the seven year oldâs my son,â he admits rather regrettably, also carrying a stunned look on his face.
âOf course thatâs your fucking spawn,â Sukuna groans to himself, causing everyone in his vicinity, especially Toji, to tense up.Â
His unseriousness served as a reminder that he was capable of murder without thinking twice about it, father to be or not.Â
It left Toji to wonder if he shouldâve just kept his mouth shut about that one little fact, but theyâd find out soon enough if they did more research on the boy. He never exactly tried to hide the fact that Megumi was his anyway, the courtesan he got pregnant just opted to sell the boy back to the clan and he let it be since he thought the boy would be taken care of if they were willing to pay as much as they did for him.
âHow did the boy end up there?â Sukuna asked while rubbing his eye, clearly irritated that this is now a fact.Â
âGot a courtesan pregnant, she said she wanted to terminate the pregnancy so I gave her money for that. By the time I found out she got money from me and the clan for selling the boy to them, it was already too late.â Toji's knuckles were nearly white as he explained everything as briefly as possible.Â
He knew his family was cruel, he just never thought theyâd convince a child to sacrifice their life in a war, let alone his own flesh and blood.Â
Heâs angry, heâs hurtâ heâs also one of the most respected generals in the region, so he reminded himself to get it the fuck together in front of the psychopath that was unfortunately crowned as king at 19 and has done a terrifyingly great job at ruling the region through fear.Â
There was no room for weakness or mistakes in the presence of Sukuna, so man up.
âI understand that this might be a conflict of interest, but I have no intentions of betraying the region or the crown,â Toji says, feeling the need to remind the clans and the king. âI left them for a reason, and it was lo-â
âNo need to state those reasons,â Sukuna cuts him off, unsure if the general was about to tell a sob story to sound convincing or not. He honestly didnât care either way. âYou need to tell me everything you know about the ten shadows technique.â
â
The meeting lasted around 9 hours, give or take. Today is one of those days where he seriously wonders why massacring entire villages is looked down upon, when acts like that have the power to prevent situations like this.Â
Sukuna is usually the last one to leave, alongside Uraume and Mariko, itâs actually one of the very few formalities he really sticks to in the world of nobility, but not today.Â
He held on tightly to the last of his composure as he b-lined it to the exit, trying his hardest not to look like heâs storming out of the room, even though he probably did end up looking like he was.Â
By now everyone knew one of his concubines was pregnant and that heâs been less.. violent lately because of it.Â
Many of the attendees have actually found themselves empathizing with the young king, especially after watching his face drop at the realization that yeah, the Zeninâs are planning an attack. They all knew the threat of war mercilessly ripped him out of the daydream he was in, forcing him back into the dreadful reality that he called his life.Â
Several ground shaking explosions followed not too long after he stormed out of the room and off to god knows wherever he went off to.Â
Some even heard the faint noise of yelling and cursing off in the direction he went in, his threats to no one in particular echoing off the trees and mountains, making their way back to whoever had a good pair of ears on them.Â
The world feels like itâs slowly closing in on him and heâs convinced he might just completely lose his mind before midnightâ throwing away the very thorough plan he and all the other generals just spent hours curating.Â
Instead, opting to charge that clan alone, head on.Â
But he canât and he knows it, which makes it all the more infuriating because for once in his life heâs facing an actual threat.Â
The threat being that final shikigami Tojiâs hidden demon child has the power to conjure up.Â
If he fucks up, this might just actually be the end of the line for him, he doesnât like the thought of thatâ hence why he blows up yet another hill.Â
The shockwaves made it to the shrine about 2.5 seconds after that.Â
He takes a look at the view in front of him and realizes heâs completely flattened acres of land. Maybe once this is all over, he could have the shrine extended.Â
If thereâs even anyone left.
If you asked him how he truly felt about it all, the news broke him.Â
He truly felt like something from above came down and clipped multiple different wires in his brain.
This wasnât the typical anger where he considers rounding up prisoners and hunting them down like animals to blow off some steam, and it ends there.Â
This was the type of anger where he wanted to drop to his knees and scream at god for doing this shit to him, againâ a war, at quite possibly the worst fucking time ever.Â
And he did, he doesnât care if people can hear him at the moment.Â
All he wanted was to enjoy these last couple months with you, and welcome his child in the peaceful-enough nation he created.Â
But no, now the nation will be baptized in blood, win or lose.
Not to mention the fact that you were at your most vulnerable right now, you canât even fully get dressed by yourself anymore without some sort of assistance. Now you were really a target and he canât be in two places at once.
He already knows that heâll look back at this years from now, whether itâs an immediate win or one thatâs drawn out, and he will fucking seethe.Â
Itâs time ripped away from his grasp, he could have more kids, enjoy the pregnancies and newborn stages with them but heâll feel nothing but rage when he looks at this one, knowing this one got fucked with.Â
This is the type of resentment that will forever marinate in his heart and heâs not sure if death to that god forsaken clan will ever be enough for him.Â
Maybe itâs a good thing, some extra fuel to really brutalize those people.Â
Many will say watching him in battle years ago was terrifying, and they may think heâs somehow mellowed out by now.Â
No. Heâs learned to redirect it, compartmentalize it. There is now strategy to that power.
And just like always, he remembers the role he plays in this world and whatâs required of him, since most people just arenât capable of the things he was born to do.
His existence is a curse within itself and he knows most people wished heâd never been born, rightfully so.Â
But those same people should really thank him one day, because this entire region wouldâve been annihilated by now without him.
He was made for this.
So he takes one last deep breath, loosens his fist, and starts to make his way back to you, because thatâs all he really can do right now.
Bracing himself, knowing you probably sat there all day hoping heâd come back with good news, yet you most likely heard the commotion he created and realized heâd be coming back with anything but that.
And when he did return, you both just looked at each other and knew.Â
Barely any words were exchanged between the two of you. The meeting ruined his appetite for the night so he skipped dinner. He tried to get you to eat but you werenât hungry either and he didnât push it because he was too tired to try to argue with you.
He stayed up that night while you eventually fell asleep in his arms. For the first time in the last 7 months, he sort of wished you werenât carrying his child.Â
It was for the most selfish reason too, he just missed laying on top of you, resting his head on your chest while listening to your shallow breathsâ it was the one thing that put him to sleep.Â
And with how uncertain the future was looking right now, a part of him began to mourn that feeling because he truly doesnât know when heâd be able to feel moments of peace like that again.
notes: so sorry for the news! hope u enjoyed the read! <3 pls leave a like, comment, and subscribe for more videos
All rights reserved Š 2024 yenayaps. Do not copy, repost, translate, or modify my works in any platform.
defiance | king!sukuna x servant!reader
chapter ten: hidden letters
summary: a psychic shares her vision with the king, saying that his soulmate would replace all 5 of his concubines one day. he had her banned from the premises for that absurd prediction. it wasn't until months later when he started believing the old bitch, after one cute yet disobedient servant started working at the shrine. TL;DR: sukuna's a sorcerer in this one, still ooc but not too much. mc pretty much ran away from home for being a hoe, and went to work at sukuna's shrine lol.
genre: female reader, heian era au but incredibly historically inaccurate, 18+, grumpy x sunshine, fluff, smut, so much crack, angst, mutual pining, might be seen as dubcon but she wants him lol, no he wont have two sets of arms, and no he wont have two dicks, srry srry srry
fic warnings: profanity, explicit smut, ooc, mentions of grooming, graphic depictions of violence, suicide, more will be added as story progresses
word count: like 3.8k?
notes: no chapter warnings this time (: enjoy the read and happy sunday!!
master list
playlist (lana heavy)
âYouâre joking.âÂ
âOh come on,â Hayami scoffed. âThat would be purely diabolical on my part.â
You crossed your arms, âWhat did they say?â
âThat theyâd like to see you again. They said theyâve been sending letters here for over two months now.âÂ
Interesting how the only ones youâve received so far were from Hayamiâ making your mind going straight to a certain salmon-haired menace who most likely knows where they are.Â
âAnd how did they find out?â
âI honestly have no idea.. Iâm guessing from Toji, maybe?â
âProbably if itâs been two months,â you grudgingly said.
â
Sukuna had just gotten back to his chambers after a long training session with Uraume, and immediately heard ruffling coming from his office in the very back.Â
Whoever had snuck in obviously didnât hear him come inside since the noise didnât stop, so he quietly shut the doorâ wanting to scare the shit out of whoever it was before he punished them.Â
Right before he reached the doorway, he heard a little âughâ that he was all too familiar with, immediately stepping into the office to see what you were doing there.Â
He froze in place, eyes blown wide open and jaw dropped at the fact that he just got caught red fucking handed.Â
He knew he couldnât even talk his way out of thisâ all 12 of the letters he hadnât disposed of were in your hand, all while you glared at him, waiting for an explanation.Â
âYouâre not mad at me, are you?â He asked in a panicked tone.Â
âYouâre really asking me that right now?â You retorted, beyond baffled at his pathetic response to getting caught hiding your mail. âKuna, how long have you had these?âÂ
He slightly pursed his lips together, pretending to think, knowing the answer was at least 2 months, but not sure if he should tell you that. âOver a month.âÂ
It technically wasnât a lie.Â
âAnd why havenât you said anything?!âÂ
He doesnât like it when you grit your teeth like that, or the way you were staring into his soul at that moment.Â
He quickly pulled it together, reminding himself that there was nothing to be nervous about. âBecause theyâre fucking assholes.â
âIâm well aware of that, I just donât get why you decided it was a good idea to keep these from me,â you scoffed.Â
âYouâre the one who said you wanted them to think youâre dead!â He argued, just remembering that little piece of information on the spot, hoping your mood wouldnât get worse than it already was.
âI did, but I still think I deserve to read whatever they have to say to me!â You argued back. âDon't you?!â
âUgh, yes,â he groaned. âOkayâ okay! It was wrong, I shouldnât have hid them from you.âÂ
âAre these all of them?âÂ
âYes,â you raised your eyebrow at his hesitancy to answer the question. âNo,â he corrected himself. âI burned the first two.âÂ
âUn-fucking-believable,â you pinched your nose bridge. âWhatever, canât take it back now.â You mumbled to yourself.Â
That was right, no he could not.Â
âThey didnât say much in the first two anyways.â He scratched the back of his head while accidentally admitting that he read them too.Â
You felt your eyes roll into the back of your head from how he didnât even realize he told on himself just now. âWhat did they say?â You let out a sigh.
âThat they missed you, that they were worried about you for the longest time, apparently. And that they were happy to hear you were doing âokayââ no apologies or even acknowledging what they did to you.âÂ
âOf course they didnât,â you said in a defeated tone. âYou swear you only burned two of them?âÂ
âI swear.â He was quick to throw his hands up as he promised, slightly relieved that you seemed more sad than mad. It was easier to make you feel better when you like that.Â
âNo apology?âÂ
âIâm not apologizing for trying to protect you.â He retorts, rather firmly, making you roll your eyes againâ you swear heâd rather die than apologize to another person.Â
ââKay, thanks for that.â Your tone wasnât too convincing, but you werenât trying to fight with him.Â
âWhere are you going?â He held his arms out.
âBack to my chambers?âÂ
He shook his head at you for trying to leave him so soon. âIâm coming with you, hold on.âÂ
You groaned at him making you wait for him while he changed out of his training clothes and into one of his daily robes. But you left it at that, not wanting to snap at him anymore than you already did.Â
He already knew you were mad, there wasnât really a point in trying to prove it even more by continuing to attack himâ no matter how questionable his thought process was.Â
âÂ
It took you around 2 hours to thoroughly read the letters, all while Sukuna found random shit to do like awkwardly tidying up your room, even though it was already clean.Â
He was just pointlessly moving around decor and random items at that point.
You figured it was out of guilt and you just let him wallow in it for a bit, until you finally invited him to sit on the bed with you while you read the last letterâ the one that came in literally 3 days ago.Â
All twelve of the letters were pretty much the sameâ asking how youâve been the past year, how much they missed you, how they wanted to see you againâ everything Sukuna said, along with them avoiding talking about what drove you to live at the shrine in the first place.Â
You wanted to talk about how much they fucked up your life, but youâve recently come to the decision that youâd stop mentioning any of the life regrets you had in front of Sukuna, whoâd get quiet whenever you did.Â
He obviously enjoyed having you here, continuing to talk about your misfortunes would just be a slap in the face to him at this point after all the effort heâs put into trying to make you happy here.
âAre you going to write them back?â He asked, looking over your shoulder and quietly reading the last letter with you despite having already read it.. three days ago.
âIâm not sure. I still donât forgive them for all the things theyâve said to me.. and literally trying to kill me. I swear I could still feel how hard my dad slapped me if I closed my eyes and really thought about it.â
He frowned at that, tucking your hair behind your ear and rubbing your cheek, unable to understand how anyone could hurt you like that.Â
Your own father out of all of the people in this world too. Heâs convinced that they only reached out to you just so they could visit the shrine, maybe climb up the ladder a bit in terms of social classes. Having a daughter that was a concubine of the king was definitely one of the easiest ways to do it, especially with how he was well known to be picky with his partners.Â
They could also work hard, but if they didnât try to do that before, he doubts theyâd try to do that now. Not only that, your parents and older brother just seemed lazy from the stories youâve told him. Taking advantage of others and then playing the victims once they got caught.Â
Sure, he believed in taking what you could get, he did it all the time.Â
But you couldnât be an asshole and a victim. There was a difference between making others think youâre a good person just to steal from them and simply going up to someone and demanding they give you something.Â
He was a part of the latter of course, and if it was fucked up, at least he was true to himself.
On top of that, he couldnât stand how fucking righteous they were. So what if you slept with people before marriage, it's not like you were born a noble or anything.Â
It clearly worked out well for you in the long run anyways, if you asked him.Â
A little too well, actuallyâ not once leaving him disappointed, ever.
âWhatever you choose to do, Iâll support you,â his words brought a smile to your face. âBut if they try to fuck with you I promise you Iâll skin them alive.â He concluded, wiping the short-lived smile right off your face.Â
âWhat a hero,â you dryly responded.Â
âMore like a villain,â he snorted as he shamelessly corrected you. âSomeones gotta be one and I do a wonderful job at playing the part.â
âThat you do.â You agreed.
âSooo,â he reached for the rest of the stack on the bed. âCan I burn these too?â
âAbsolutely not, Kuna.â
â
âMy king,â Kaori walked up to Sukuna and Uraume, bowing with her five other attendants. âIt's a beautiful day, isnât it?â The young woman attempted to spark up a conversation with him for what seemed like the millionth time.
Sukuna was on his way to the throne room, not in the mood for small talk. âI guess. Too bad I canât enjoy it since Iâm late for the hearing,â he briefly responded, hoping sheâd get discouraged from keeping the conversation going.Â
âIâm sorry to hear that. Were you being accompanied by any of the concubines today?âÂ
âLady Ayameâs already there.âÂ
He tried to get you to come today, and wished you actually wouldâve because then this woman wouldnât be approaching himâ but you didnât have the stomach to go to hearings on most days, today being one of those days.Â
The only ones who could truly stand them were Ayame and Yuna, but he learned his lesson with Yuna after just one time.Â
That little shit started laughing and clapping like a fucking seal after he beheaded someone for a reason he could no longer remember since it was already long ago. The only thing he remembers was Yuna embarrassing him and her not giving a single fuck if she didâ never again.
âMay I join? I would love to see what your daily commitments look like.â She smiled at him warmly.
Fucks sakeâ this is what he gets for trying to get another concubine when you both were fighting. Now heâs cursed with some random girl that thinks he picked her out because he was interested in her.Â
And to make matters worse, you pushed him to visit her, which he ended up doing a couple timesâ you were an absolute trooper for even suggesting that, but eventually told you that he was done.Â
Fast forward to now, both him and Uraume genuinely feel like she spends her day walking around the shrine trying to search for him, judging by the amount of times sheâs approached him since the first visit.
âNo, you may not.â He answered coldly, staring her down as if she were some persistent gnat. Nothing annoys him more than when a person asks him for something.Â
The girl thankfully excused herself, still surprisingly as gracious as ever, even after receiving a harsh rejection. It was something he wouldâve respected in the past prior to meeting you, but now itâs just old and boring.
Have a backbone, look at him like you want to stab him or something if you really want his attention.Â
He found it funny how much things could change in less than 6 monthsâ who wouldâve thought heâd grown to enjoy being scolded, even feeling compelled to start petty little arguments to get you riled up.Â
Key word: You.Â
If anyone else were to try that shit with him, fuckâ good luck.Â
Having Kaori at the shrine wasnât all that bad though. He surprisingly got along well (enough) with her father, who was the shogun of the Silk District.Â
It was the main reason why he didnât go back on the deal, even though he had already made up with you before it was finished.Â
Direct access to silk didn't hurt anyone. Plus, he figured youâd like the clothing from there tooâ and you did. He likes the way your eyes light up when he brings you back new dresses, skirts, robes, whatever.
Now he just needed to find a way to get Kaori to fuck off, that girl was too persistentâ it was going to drive him up the wall.
â
âHey, is Mariko free right now?â You asked her lady in waiting that opened the main door to her chambers.
âYes she is!â Mariko yelled out from the general area, before her attendant could even answer. âPlease, come in! Aiko, could you make her some tea please?âÂ
âOf course, my lady.â Aiko bowed and excused herself.
âHow can I help you princess?â She asked, her tone laced with her usual playfulness.
You wanted to roll your eyes at the nickname, she started calling you that after sitting next to Sukuna during the ceremony on the second day of the festival.
âWell..â you handed her the letters you received from your parents. âIâm trying to figure out if I want to write back to my family or not. Help me out here, Miss Consultant.âÂ
âIâd love to,â she said, immediately reaching for the papers. âYou know, I thought youâd feel comfortable enough to come to me after one or twoâ not 12.âÂ
âActually, there were originally 14. Sukuna burned the first two, and then I found the rest hidden in his office.âÂ
âOf course you did,â she mumbled while skimming through the letters, not even wanting to get into how much of an idiot that man could be at timesâ smart enough, yet so irrational.Â
âYour parents are assholes.â She concluded after reading one of the letters. She already knew about your backstory, courtesy of Sukuna and his big mouth.
âI know.â You wholeheartedly agreed.
âNot even an apology?âÂ
âNope.âÂ
âI meanâ do you still want a relationship with them?âÂ
âSometimes,â you admit. âBut then I remember how easy it was for them to disown me.â And attempted to murder you, but you left that part out because you were pretty sure you sounded like a broken record at that point.
âOkay, keep this between you and me,â she directly faced you and started to whisper. âBut General Tojiâs so hot. If I were your mother, I wouldâve been so proud.âÂ
Your eyes widened at the concubines confession. âPlease donât let Sukuna hear you say that.â You whined, not failing to think about the grade A tantrum heâd throw if he ever heard that sentenceâ you within a 20 feet radius of it. You had enough ptsd from the flower festival to make you physically recoil from her words.Â
âHeâs just jealous,â she nudged you with her elbow.Â
âHeâs terrifying when heâs jealous.â You murmur. âAnyways,â you quickly change the subject, âshould I write back to them?âÂ
âIt wouldnât hurt,â she shrugged. âItâs not like they could do anything to hurt you now that you're here. You donât have to have a relationship with them either. You can always make that decision after hearing what they have to say to you.âÂ
âThatâs true,â You smiled, remembering how Sukuna said heâd support you either way. âOk, Iâm gonna do it. Even if itâs just to get some closure.â
âThatâs my girl,â she clasped her hands together before pulling you in for a hug. âNow onto more important mattersâ when are you going to give the throne an heir?!âÂ
âNot anytime soon,â you clicked your tongue.Â
âBoring,â she booed. âIt would be such a cute kid too, what a waste of genetics,â she pouted.
An heir was something Mariko had been bringing up with you and Sukuna more and more often lately. Sometimes even when you two were together, but he never made it weird.
Ever since taking you to his son's grave, heâs been surprisingly honest with you about how he felt about having another child.Â
And his feeling on that being that he didnât want to have another one just yet, he also knew and understood your own fears when it came to pregnancy and motherhood. It was something you two would revisit in the future.
He however had slipped up many times while having sex with youâ deliriously telling you that he was going to put a baby in you, and how youâd be the prettiest mommy. You both always ignored that little detail though once you both finally came back to your senses.
There was also the newly common occurrence where heâd âforgetâ to have Uraume bring you your usual morning concoction.Â
âWhen will Uraume be coming this morning?âÂ
âWhy would they come here?âÂ
â..To drop off the elixir?â
âOh.. rightâ yeah, theyâll be here soon.â
Mornings like those always made you wonder if he was just lying to himself, but you werenât going to push the subjectâ heâd eventually say something to you if he were that serious at giving fatherhood a second chance.Â
â-
Kaori waited near the exit of the throne room, hoping sheâd run into Sukuna again so she could invite him to eat dinner with her later. Her heartbeat steadily picked up once the doors opened, servants coming out first, the king and higher ranks usually being the last. Alas, after finally seeing him come out of the building she started making her way towards him, ready to greet him with a smile on her faceâ one that was just for him.
Except she was beat to it by you and your newest lady in waiting, Hayami.
A lowly servant turned concubine and a used up whore turned attendantâ both of low birth, never once contributing anything useful to society except your bodies and wasting the shrine's resources.
Apparently you two were childhood friends, it made plenty of sense to her with how classless you both wereâ both of you spending your days frolicking around the estate, you being openly affectionate with the king for everyoneâs eyes to see.
It was shameful how desperate you were to have the king's attentionâ all to yourself, at that.
For the first time ever, she saw a smile creep up on his face that usually held a stoic expression for the world, including herself, to see.Â
The smile he had on his face being just for you, as you walked up to him with a letter in your hand.Â
The circulating rumors of you being a witch made more and more sense to her with each day that passed. There was no fucking way King Sukuna could be that interested in whatever was in that letterâ all while something randomly possessed him to tuck your hair behind your ears.Â
And as if that wasnât enough to have the misfortune to witness, he started rubbing your back and shoulders as you started to read its contents to him, his smile growing wider by the minute.
She was stunned you even knew how to read, most servants being illiterate due to lack of education.
He even spoke kindly to your lady in waiting, despite his reputation for being known to act like the servants and attendants in the shrine didnât exist aside from his ownâ and yours, apparently.
Sheâll never understand how some men could have shit for taste despite having the world at the palm of their hands.Â
You didnât even have mannersâ your eyes glazed over during the entirety of the ceremony that was held during the festival, not one ounce of respect or care for tradition thatâs been around for hundreds of years.
How dare you act that way in the presence of a king?
Disgraceful.
Vulgar.
Ill-bred bitch.
And of course he let it slide after you took him back to your chambers afterwards to let him fuck you like the whore you were.
But itâs like what her mother told her: men will play around with whoeverâs easy and available while theyâre young, but they always end up marrying the good girlsâ the ones whoâd actually make good wives and good mothers.
And thatâs why she wasnât worried about you, at all. He was going to use you for all that you had until there was eventually nothing left for you to offer, and then inevitably toss you aside, like the opportunistic whore you were.Â
â-Â
âSooo.. what do you think?â You asked him right after reading him the letter you were planning on sending to your parents out loud.
He took the letter from your hands and skimmed through it, while his other hand kept a gentle, yet firm hold on the back of your neck.
âYou spelled I hope youâre doing terrible wrongââÂ
âNo I didnât,â you hissed, pulling a chuckle out of him.Â
He didnât get why you were so nervous all of the sudden, itâs not like they were going to disown and throw you out onto the street.Â
They already did that, like the useless people they wereâ clearly undeserving of a daughter like you. The last thing you needed were people like that in your life.Â
But he did promise you that heâd be supportive, no matter how much he hated the idea of you potentially forgiving them.Â
So he was going to keep his mouth shut and do exactly just thatâ be the emotional support you needed for when or if they inevitably broke your heart again.Â
âYou wrote them a kind letter.â He said, holding back the many other choice words he had lined up for your family. âDid Mariko end up helping you with it?âÂ
âNope, it was all me,â you proudly said. âI did ask her for her advice though before deciding if I wanted to write back to them or not. For now I just want to hear them out. If theyâre insincere about it, then Iâm not going to try to rekindle a relationship with them.âÂ
Thank fucking god.Â
âSmart girl,â he continued to rub the back of your neck. âAnything else you and Mariko talked about?âÂ
âNope,â you chirped, trying not to let his little smirk get to you.Â
âYou sure?â He prodded, alluding to the subject that woman has been persistently circling back to lately whenever she was around either of you.
Judging by how red you got, Mariko definitely brought up you both trying for children when you visited her earlier. You were always so shy when the topic came up, it was fun teasing you about itâ he thought it was sweet.
âPositive,â you grit your teeth, removing his hand from you, only for him to take your hand in his and placing a soft kiss on it.Â
âDonât get all feisty with me now, Iâm just asking you a question,â he continued to taunt you, tongue in cheekâ all while Hayami held back her own giggles in the background, watching it go on until you complained about being hungry and wanting to eat already.Â
And of course he offered to take you back to his chambers, letting Hayami have the rest of day and night off as usual.
next chapter
notes: kaori's a real joy isn't she? also, how are we feeling about sukuna hiding 2+ months worth of letters? and him teasing her about mariko pushing her to have babies?
All rights reserved Š 2024 yenayaps. Do not copy, repost, translate, or modify my works in any platform.
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simon who is just straight up cruel when it comes to fucking you when he's in a bad mood.
he comes home after a long shift at work. he was so pissed off that he couldn't think straight. captain has been driving him up the fucking wall, nagging at him for doing something that he isn't particularly comfortable with during one of their missions or whatever. he can't even remember? he's so mad.
you barely got any words out of your mouth before his tongue was shoved deep down your throat?!
fifteen minutes later, he's folding you in half till jt was physically impossible. your legs pressed right up against your chest while his cock slams in and out your wet pussy.
you can't even calculate anything but his cock ruining your deluctable pussy. you know you look fucked out of your mind right now. don't need a smart-alec to figure that one out. tears prickling out of your eyes, staining your pretty cheeks. mouth wide open, jabbering on nothing but full-on bullshit.
simon wasn't paying attention to that though - too pleasure-hungry for his own good. he grips onto harder onto your thighs and continues to drive his cock in and out of your wet channel. you were close, and you could tell he was too. his movements beginning to slow and become incoherent.
he moves the pad of his thumb against your clit, drawing soft circles until the knot in your stomach bursts and your pussy quivers around his cock. your arousal dripping down his cock as you come down from your high, which was suddenly taken from you when you feel a sharp feeling against your clit. you choke upon your tears as his thumb continues to tease your twitchy clit and he doesn't stop fucking you wrecklessly, "don'worry, sweetness. cummin' soon."
he utters out between a groan. he was true to his words. his cock pulsating inside of you as his load fills you cunt up, hand digging into your thighs which was bound to leave grim bruises later, but whatever.
he expels a shuddering breath before pulling out of you. his cum drizzles out of your fluttering hole and he stares at your throbbing pussy in awe. you try shift up onto your elbows, but he stops you with a hand on your stomach, pushing you back down in place.
"nowhere near done, lovie."
Sukuna
[Chapter 7] Prisoner
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Pairing: Trueform!Sukuna x f!Reader
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Winter comes faster than expected. Within the blink of an eye, snow begins to fall and youâre prohibited from going outside. Now more than ever, you feel trapped.Â
You donât feel any changes in the weather. The moment the temperature gets colder, Sukuna orders for more layers to be placed on you. Though you plead with Hina to let you breathe, all the layers are weighing heavily upon you, she has no option but to listen to Sukuna. Sukunaâs orders trumps all.
To add more to your suffocation, youâre bigger every day. Itâs gotten to the point that you canât see your feet, no matter how much you try. Youâre prohibited from doing anything and everything, and you canât secretly indulge since Sukuna watches your every move.Â
Though lately you wake up in the middle of the night and heâs gone. You know what heâs doing, and you canât find yourself getting upset about it. Sukuna made it clear that your marriage means nothing. To add to it, you donât feel anything towards him.Â
You wouldâve sworn that at this point youâd have some sort of feelings towards Sukuna. Youâre more sentimental than youâd like to admit⌠But Sukuna isnât someone that you can find yourself attached to. On the contrary, youâre getting mad at his mere presence. Maybe itâs because he makes you feel like a prisoner, while he gets to freely live his life.
You wouldnât dare go against Sukunaâs orders. That is until youâre very well into your pregnancy, and you realize that he wouldnât dare hurt you. You know that you made a deal months back. You pretty much agreed to be his prisoner in order for him to save your brotherâs life. But youâre tired.
You need a break from him just for a few hours. Which is why you wait for him to leave in the middle of the night in order to get up. Luckily, you donât have to sneak past anyone. Since Sukuna has taken over the task of watching over you, no one bothers with keeping an eye over you.Â
You can barely watch your step, but you donât dare to take a candle because youâll just give yourself away. You finally get a breath of fresh air before realization kicks in. What are you exactly planning? You canât go back home to your family, itâll just end poorly for them.Â
You just need a breath of fresh air. Youâll go back inside in a matter of seconds. You need a moment where Sukuna isnât watching your every movement. You just want to watch the snow fall, like you once did. You want to feel human, even if itâs just for minutes.
âMy queen, what are you doing here?â Youâre spooked by an all familiar voice. You put your hand over your fast beating heart as you turn to see your servant.
âHina.â You acknowledge her presence before walking away. Sheâs assigned to you, but ultimately, she listens to Sukuna. She knows better than anyone that he wonât allow you to be here, which is why you walk away before she can speak up.Â
âMy queen, youâre not supposed to be out here.â She tells you, and you pretend not to listen as you walk away. Youâve gotten to know the palace like the back of your hand these past months, but it gets slightly difficult to navigate when itâs darkâ And you wonât even mention the giant bump thatâs grown over the past months. Youâre most certainly expecting more than one baby, just as your husband wants.
âKing Sukuna is going to be livid if he finds you here.â She reminds you, following behind you. She canât restrain you, but sheâll remind you that there will be consequences if Sukuna finds out.
âLivid? Heâs burying himself inside another woman. He canât be livid that his wife is taking a short walk.â You answer, and it dawns on her. Something that youâd never admit to yourself.Â
âHeâs worried about the babies, arenât you worried about them?â Hina questions and you freeze. How are you supposed to tell her that youâre not? You continue walking, deciding that not answering is the best possible option.Â
âIs this because youâre jealous?â She suddenly blurts out and itâs like a switch flips inside of you. You turn around to look at her and you scoff.
âJealous of what? That a grotesque monster is with some other woman?â You sound offended that she even dared to ask that. âPlease donât ever disrespect me like that again, Hina.â
âA grotesque monster?â You hear the chilling voice behind you, before youâre lifted off the floor by him. Youâre not even given a second to defend yourself before heâs carrying you back inside.
âSukuna! Put me down!â You yell, kicking your feet as he forcefully takes you inside. âSukuna! Put me down! Iâm ordering you to put me down!â
âWhat makes you think Iâd listen to you?â He responds as you continue kicking your feet. Youâre yelling at him to put you down on the ground, you can still use your own two feet to walk back to your room. Sukuna finally fulfills your wishes when you reach your room, gently putting you down on the floor. The moment your feet make contact with the floor, he scolds you, âWhat is it with you and not listening?â
âI just need a breath of fresh air. You always refuse when I ask so I took matters into my own hands.â You cross your arms, an act that is barely visible in the dead of night. Sukuna lights a candle, that way you can see his every expression. He wants you to be scared by a mere look. He wants you to see just how grotesque he truly is. âI feel like a prisoner, Sukuna. I canât stay locked inside this cage until these babies come out of me.â
âWhat did you think this was?â Sukuna has a mocking tone of voice, making your blood run cold. It knocks you out of the idealistic world that you live in your head. âYou feel like a prisoner because you are one. You traded your liberty for your brotherâs life, and now youâre mine.â
You feel tears well up in your eyes, the harsh reality check breaking your heart. Why did you think you would have a say? You canât even walk outside of your room and take a breath of fresh air until spring. You canât do anything that Sukuna doesnât approve of.Â
âI just want a breath of fresh air.â Your voice cracks, unable to contain the emotions that flow through you. This is your life now, and itâs hard to accept. Youâve had a couple of months to get used to the idea, but youâve given yourself a higher position than the one that you actually have.
âAnd youâre about to cry.â Sukuna scoffs, watching as tears fill your eyes to the brim. His words are the catalyst that leads the salty tears to stream down your face. âGreat.â
âWhy canât I just step outside for a minute?â You cry, and he rolls his eyes. âIâm not running away, I just needââ
âDo you think the cold isââ Sukuna interrupts you but he canât finish his sentence without being cut off by one of your sobs. He sighs, stepping closer to you and wiping your tears with his kimono. He gently pats your back, the way Uraume told him to. âThere, there.â
âI canât do anything without you. I can barely breathe without you breathing down my neck.â Youâre a complete mess, and Sukuna scoffs yet again. It should be an honor for you to say those words, yet you sound distraught.
âThe cold isnât good for my heirs.â Sukuna reminds you, something that you should know by now. Heâs made it clear since the beginning, and he reminds you every time he reprimands you for asking to go outside.Â
âDo you know how hard it is to be locked inside all day every day?â You ask him, and he looks annoyed at the question. Of course he wouldnât know, but this is for your very own good. âIâm staring at a wall for hours on end, while you breathe down my neckâ If not you, then one of your stupid servants.â
âDo you not care for your own sons that you continue to make such stupid points?â Sukuna questions, and a knot forms in your throat. You look away from him, wiping away the tears that manage to escape your eyes. Youâve never said it out loud, but you guess thereâs a first time for everything. Youâre scared about how heâll react though.
You take a deep breath.
âI donât.â You answer. âTheyâre your sons, not mine.â
âHuh?â It takes a lot to leave Sukuna dumbfounded, and youâve accomplished it. Heâs staring at you as if youâve managed to cast a spell. âWhat did you just say?â
âI do not care for your heirs.â You repeat, and Sukuna isnât sure how to react.
He knows of women that donât love their offspring, usually they come offering their babies as currency. However, most women that come to him, come with the purpose of saving their children, whether born or unborn. Heâs heard that humans tend to love their babies since before theyâre even born, and he surely wouldâve expected that from you. But thatâs not the case.
âOf course, you wouldnât care for the heirs of such a grotesque monster.â He responds, and you nod in agreement. You canât even look him in the eye, but you act boldly. Sukuna tries to not get hurt by your response, because in the end it doesnât matter. âYou still have to carry them, and nurture them once theyâre born. You canât get rid of them so easily.â
His hand goes under your chin, tilting your head up and forcing you to look at him,
âWhether you like it or not, youâre still my prisoner.â