Bro Eat It ALL FR 💀

cursed manwhore! A.U called ‘whoreman’.

the whole thing is basically just that instead of Odysseus offering his body / seducing others so that he can get home, Ody’ is just an absolute freak by nature who tries to fucks whoever he wants, just bc he can. (don’t worry, him n Penelope had an agreement ‘bout it :33) also because unfortunately, he is way too ‘appreciative’ to anyone who he deems ‘attractive’.

Eury’ and the Crew know this all to well n are constantly trying to drive away any potential victims of their captain’s said Freakyness, bc those thighs on him are a death sentence, everything is a death sentence srsly run 4 ur lives this man is danger to everyone’s stamina.

Events play out literally exactly the same as canon but now w/ slutty Odysseus exuding horny energy like he’s Primordial! Eros in disguise.

hfhggggg Odysseus’s blinding enthusiasm on getting down dirty is so powerful that even Poseidon n Zeus, two of the most *cough* ‘active’ Gods r just like “wow—“ upon seeing Ody’, still fully clothed, yet somehow giving off some of the strongest ‘fuck me’ vibes known to everyone, doing the Babygirl pose with absolutely NO SHAME & NO HESITATION AS HE LOOKS THEM IN THE EYES LIKE “you down to fuck gorgeous? 😏😏😏”

idk why I thought this 😭

Edit: shout out to @lunaria1 4 the suggestion that Whore! Ody’ sings Britney Spears so while the story still has all the canon songs, there’s now also a bunch of lyric parody vers of Britney Spears songs ]:)))

Gave it a try

This is my first time I've ever done a template before!...I hope people will try it..maybe? I don't know -_-

But hey it's free so use your different styles!

A collection of Polites x Poseidon and Eurylochus x Zeus doodles :3

Right off the bat, everyone point at @bloodlustwarrior for Zeury’s existence. It is such a chaotic pairing and I love it. Toxic yaoi my fav /j Also naturally had to add in Polites n Poseidon cause I genuinely do love them now ( ◕‿‿◕ ) It’s def my fav god x mortal ship for Epic -w- Doing all of these makes me really appreciate the wackiness this fandom can so casually cook up. I definitely should draw more random crack/rarepairs. So like not saying hand your wacky pairs over,,,but I’m all ears >:]

Although I do just wanna say, I’m not actually that big on Odysseus ships outside of OdyPen + OdyPo. So if I do draw more rarepairs, just never expect an Ody one. Sorry to disappoint :,3 But hey, just means there’s more room for being creative with pairings (¬‿¬)

Mandatory bonus doodle atp:

prometheus: hot take,

the greek gods: no give that back

You can’t keep brothers apart when they have instincts

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals

bsd ships x textposts

At the ending of 'I'm just a man' I can imagine Polites trying to catch the falling baby only to miss, just. Barely. So he can only look between Odysseus and the baby in shock.

I can imagine in the underworld when Odysseus sings "I keep thinking of the infant from that night, I keep thinking of the infant from that night" when Polites jumps in I imagine him finally catching the baby and singing to it and Odysseus.

I don't know why I do this.

hc!phil is just full of joy and whimsy (context to this lmao)

People on Twitter liked this a little bit so it's going here too