Also My Greatest Fear

As I began to love myself 

I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is "AUTHENTICITY".

As I began to love myself

I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it "RESPECT".

As I began to love myself

I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it "MATURITY".

As I began to love myself

I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment. So I could be calm. Today I call it "SELF-CONFIDENCE".

As I began to love myself

I quit steeling my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it "SIMPLICITY".

As I began to love myself

I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything the drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is "LOVE OF ONESELF".

As I began to love myself

I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is "MODESTY".

As I began to love myself

I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where everything is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it "FULFILLMENT".

As I began to love myself

I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection "WISDOM OF THE HEART".

We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born. Today I know that is "LIFE"!

Emotional Border Letter - Derya's promise to herself

You don't need to understand anymore.

It's not for you to weigh, measure, question the feelings I'm experiencing.

I opened up to you, I wanted you to hear my voice.

But every time you tried to pull me into your story.

By ignoring my story.

Now I am silent. But this is not a defeat.

This silence is not an escape.

It's a limit.

It's my right to protect myself.

It's my right to choose my inner peace.

This is my determination to stand on my own side from now on.

Keep everything that is rightfully yours.

I will no longer carry burdens that are not mine.

I let go of guilt, obligation, shame.

Because I want to walk only with my essence.

I owe only my own heart.

And now I pay that debt:

I forgive, love and protect myself.

This is my inner farewell letter.

Not to you, but to myself, whom I have silenced in the past.

I exist now.

And that's how I'm okay.

-Derya

I can't express myself like I want because of fear. I want to loose this fear and I will.

Definitely 🥹

Bir tatlı kaşık huzur 🌸🌸🌸 (hier: Yeldegirmeni bungalow evleri) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRd_TAiNEa5pRbMHBDWDIgPKe2e3-XjNoRT2ug0/?utm_medium=tumblr

Victoria Harbour in Hongkong

Extraschicht - Die Nacht der Industriekultur NRW

I saw a miracle today and it was this. I had already given up hope but after 2 years with only one withered leaf I get my new flower. This means a lot to me because it shows me that you shouldn't give up too quickly and just take care of it and the shoot will give you a new flower.