I Wrote Dis

Humor is so attractive tho…

Just be laughing my ass off like hahahahavesexwithme lol

I know how to be a drug addict, self destruction is familiar so in a fucked up way it’s comforting to me. Recovery and sobritey are new, a whole new way of living and honestly it fucking terrfies me because I’m afraid i wont be able to maintain it.. What if i fuck everything up again?

Excerpt from my journal 6-11-19

push me onto the bed and climb on top of me

Recent pic of me

Why am I always struggling I can’t do anything right. I’m too sick to work and nothing is ever stable in my life. Just a bunch of chaos and hell fires. I’m doing the right thing but it doesn’t matter. I hate not being able to support myself it makes me feel less than I hate asking for help I hate feeling weak. I don’t know what to do. I jump from idea to idea but always find myself struggling to complete on task. What is wrong with me I’m all over the place.